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Chapter Thirty-Six

Posted on Monday, 21 August 2006

While Sophia and Frederick were still busy with one baby, Anne took the others to the drawing room when Lady Russell had finished admiring the other one. She suspected that the second child might well require similar attention soon and there was no need for everybody to look on, not to mention that Lady Russell's ears were not accustomed to their crying.

"It is not easy to find out such things at sea," Frederick said to his sister, sounding faintly defensive.

"That…does not make it less amusing. I am sorry."

"I was shocked by how she looked. I came to tell Anne something and I never knew something might be going on." He had been surprised, despite having been told she was lying in.

Sophia froze. "Have you watched?"

"Not intentionally!"

She resumed her movements. She had not noticed and why should she care now?

"I almost fainted. I should have left, but I could not leave you, even if there was nothing I could do. And that thing, it was so ugly and you called her lovely! I felt for you. Anne pushed me away and told me to tell the admiral, but I felt I was lying, making him happy with something that was clearly not healthy. I know there were three women thinking the child was normal, but…"

"You were almost more distraught than their father," she observed with compassion. "He had much the same fears about the second child. I hope that in the future you will both be better at weathering this."

He was surprised. "Will you have more?"

"James says no, certainly not." She did not know how much that was worth, but at any rate her chances would probably not be any better than improbable, whether he changed his mind or not.

"Then you must think they will be mine." He imagined himself glancing in on his wife and not his sister. That would be even worse.

"Yes, that is what I think. If you are on a ship full of strange men when it occurs, you may even want to involve yourself rather than leave it to somebody else. In fact, she may beg you to."

"I remind you of what I have always said." He had always said he would not change his mind, whether he married or not. Ladies did not belong on board, pregnant ladies least of all.

"Ah, you also say no, certainly not," she nodded. "Did your captain not once say the same? I do believe he did. But then he saw one he liked and he asked her to live on board with him."

"He could not afford to have you live anywhere else," he pointed out. "Those lodgings of his…"

"It may not have occurred to you yet, but your wife may be happiest living with you, whatever you could afford. If he had left me in such a house as this at the start of our marriage…" She was not sure what would have become of them if he had done that. It was good that such a thing had never crossed his mind.

"You are the evil genius behind all the lectures on happy wives, are you not, Sophia?" Frederick inquired.

"If being a happy wife makes me an evil genius, then I am. Hand me the warm water again, if you please."

He obeyed. "I am referring to your using an intermediary, sister."

"The poor man feels terribly used, I am sure."

"He said you had forced him," Frederick said with a frown at what he was being forced to hold. It was soiled.

"He did go through a shy phase," she agreed. "I say, Frederick, do you happen to remember exactly how this thing was fastened? I forgot."

"I shall be glad to do it for you if you will take this dirty rag from me. I am almost afraid to say I did pay attention. What is her name?" He was a little more confident now that she was clean and quiet.

Sophia watched him in astonishment. He had really paid attention when he had undressed her. "Er…we are still conducting negotiations. I mean, James' suggestions still amuse me enough to keep silent about my perfectly normal ones."

"Yes, why should he become serious if you do not want him to be?" He rolled his eyes at them. "How will he react to no longer being your only baby? Could I say I want nieces with normal names?"

Frederick joined the others not long afterwards, looking happy to have escaped the cleaning of his second niece. That he must now be in the company of Lady Russell was only slightly better, however. He wondered what she would say.

During one of their talks yesterday Anne had said she did not know what Lady Russell was thinking, but that she was not completely opposed. He had replied that the woman did not have the right to be opposed to anything, but he had seen that her opinion mattered to Anne to some extent and he was at least prepared to behave in a manner that could influence her positively. Perhaps being caught examining his niece had not been a good start, although it had very properly been in the presence of her father.

He wondered if he could once be so proud of a little girl, even if she had done something absolutely disgusting. The admiral had considered it disgusting too, but no less wonderful. Frederick smiled at it. Perhaps the time for retaliation had come. If he was being made to feel a fool so often, he deserved the opportunity to strike back too.

"Will Sophia be back?" asked the admiral.

"I do not think you should press Sophia too much to come downstairs," her brother answered. "I think she may be lying down now. She would tell you to amuse yourself with Anne." He thought he was being good by not mentioning the possibility that he might be monopolising Anne himself.

Lady Russell looked a trifle shocked. "Anne," she said to change the subject. "Have you got any definitive plans? You will not go to Bath anymore, I suppose."

"I do not want to, but…" She shrugged with a helpless look. She supposed she should tell her father in person, yet there was nobody to accompany her. Exquisite happiness was invariably followed a rough return to practical matters. Either she would have to postpone her marriage until Sophia had recovered enough to go with her or risk inevitable displeasure by getting married on the sly. She turned pale and tears shone in her eyes.

Admiral Croft, who was not seated too far away to lean towards her, began to whisper.

For once she was glad for the size of the Kellynch drawing rooms, although she too was unable to hear what he was saying. "Could you say that again?" she asked softly.

"Do you think a note would not do?" he whispered. "Think of what you would hear if you told him." In fact, he was not certain that Sir Walter would say anything at all, but silence was equally disheartening. He had once informed his father with a note as well, only to have the reply be the written equivalent of silence.

"Think of what I should hear if I did not tell him!" she replied. He would fear slander and gossip, when others' opinions mattered so much to him.

"But by then you will be safely provided for by other people."

That was true and a feeble smile returned. They would be here and she did not have to care about what went on in Bath. She nodded and bravely rubbed her eyes. "I will stay," she said to Lady Russell.

"I thought you might stay," said Lady Russell. "You do not like Bath."

"And nobody would notice if I was there." She found she had a decided preference now for being noticed, if she had the choice. In Bath she would be tolerated, but here she would be liked.

Frederick spoke because he could not let that pass. "Half the Navy noticed you. They told me some very strange things in Bath."

Anne was surprised. "About me?" She had not done anything strange.

"I told you they would notice," the admiral said smugly. "Whom did you talk to, Frederick?"

"Captain Preston."

"Ah, rubbish." He dismissed whatever had been said with a wave of his hand.

"Rubbish? So you did not have a girl jump into your arms, Admiral?" That was one of the bits he could still not believe.

"I did, Captain."

Frederick noted the unspoken correction. Yes, he should try to use the name. "I had thought you were more the sort to step aside if a girl threatened to jump, so I did not believe this information."

"Would you have wanted me to do that to this particular girl? I cannot imagine Preston related this with any sort of truthfulness, but the bit about the girl was almost true. She threw herself down some steps to escape some fellow."

Frederick wondered if that fellow was the Elliot cousin and what he had been doing to make Anne jump. He would not ask her about it in company. "Preston was indeed baiting me, with his tales about how you amused yourself with a girl because Sophia was huge." There would have been even more baiting if Preston had known whose girl it was, he supposed.

"I also amused myself with the huge Sophia, though not in plain view. It would have been too boring to relate even if Preston had seen it, because I am married to her."

"Oh!" Anne exclaimed, fearing Lady Russell's reaction to all this frankness. "I was there and nothing occurred, save that he walked me to my father's house and we were seen by some acquaintances who did not know who I was. He never had any time alone with Sophia."

"Indeed. I even made Anne share a room with Sophia everywhere. My father would have objected strongly to mixed occupancy under his roof, so the ladies had to stay together. And at the inn…well, inns are not safe if the windows are not very high. You never know which unsavoury characters might climb up."

There was a surprising arrival in the middle of their conversation. "We found ourselves nearby," Edward Wentworth announced after he had been greeted.

Anne had watched silently, but apparently everyone was as surprised by this visit as she. She had always liked Frederick's brother and she was glad to see what had become of him. Although it had been a few years since he had moved away, he had not changed much and she had recognised him instantly.

His wife looked rather sick, Anne thought. She observed Mrs Wentworth in concern and managed to seat herself beside her. "But you are not well," she said very softly. "Would you like to leave the room?"

"Please," Mrs Wentworth said gratefully.

Anne took her out of the room, only to have her vomit into an ornamental umbrella stand that was fortunately empty because of its highly impractical location. "Oh," Anne said, much impressed with her timing and aim.

"I am so sorry," Mrs Wentworth said when she was able to speak again.

"Oh, do not be. Nobody ever keeps umbrellas in there anyway." It would be easier to clean up this way too.

"It was very kind of you. Could you show me where to rinse my mouth?"

"Of course." Anne took her to the water closet and waited. "Would you like to be shown to your room to lie down? Could I have anything made for you?"

"I shall be all right now. I do not want to lie down. I hope this does not sound too curious, but I want to hear what they are talking about." She glanced in the direction of the drawing room.

"And perhaps Mr Wentworth is worried about you." He had looked more occupied with Frederick than with the two ladies leaving the room, although Anne had not looked very closely. She studied Mrs Wentworth now -- perhaps her age or a year younger and in appearance exactly what she would have supposed him to marry, but perhaps a little less serious than her husband.

"No, I do not think so." She caught Anne's look of surprise and had to explain. "He would be if he did not know what it was, but he is used to it. I do this every day. I am expecting."

"Oh. Yes. June." Anne smiled. "That was very good news. I am very pleased for you and Mr Wentworth. But should you have travelled so far if you are not well?"

"Edward had little faith in his brother. He admitted it might be unjustified, but in that case he would have little faith in his sister's skills in organising a wedding, so he said he had to come here. I…did not stop him." She smiled bashfully. "He must not be discouraged from doing exciting things, not by my condition."

"A wedding?" Anne's eyes went wide. "Did Frederick speak of a wedding? How did you know there was a possibility?" He had not said a word to her, but he had told his brother? Had he gone away, knowing what he would do when he would come back?

"He told one of our acquaintances that he was engaged --"

She gasped. "Engaged! To whom?"

"Well, to you. And naturally this acquaintance, an older lady, quizzed him about his wedding plans. He looked as if he had never attended a wedding in his life and clearly he did not know anything about weddings at all, so I had to help him out. Then he left and Edward said his sister practically ran through a church and came out married at the other end without so much as a kiss, so…yes. Here we are." They had reached the door again. "You are engaged, Miss Elliot, are you not? Or have I just said something painful?"

"We are engaged now. It was a surprise to hear he had spoken of it, that is all."

"I gather he said rather more to us than to you -- but of course a brother could not reject him the way a woman could," she said a little apologetically.

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Posted on Thursday, 24 August 2006

"Where is everybody?" asked Anne when she returned with Mrs Wentworth. Suddenly it occurred to her that they would once both answer to that. They already had something in common. They were married to two brothers who for all their differences seemed fond of each other. Not a word about her had passed their lips, but Frederick had smiled at Edward and then he had known. She had seen that. And now both of them were gone.

Admiral Croft had the same idea about the two ladies. "Your men have gone to fetch my women. Not even their own women, my women." He seemed proud of the fact that his women were more important, or even of the fact that he now had several.

Anne wondered if he had elaborated on this to Lady Russell after the other two gentlemen had left them alone, but she could not discern anything.

"Your women?" Mrs Wentworth asked with a puzzled look. "But Captain Wentworth told us that Mrs Croft was merely…er…and then he used a word to describe it, but it does not mean very large."

"Ah, brotherly love. It expresses itself so eloquently."

"But I never concluded she was large enough to have -- did she…?" she asked, unable to suppress her curiosity.

"She did."

"Oh, that is wonderful! But so did you then!" she realised, stepping forward to congratulate him.

"That is remarkably clever of you."

"I must congratulate you on becoming a father! And your women -- it must be a girl?"

"Two girls." He accepted her congratulations and did not let her go instantly. "I heard from Frederick that you and Edward will soon follow in our footsteps."

She blushed. "Yes, he is very happy with that."

The admiral raised his eyebrows at her. "Are you not?"

"I am, but not in the morning. Although I try to be."

"And what brought you here?" he asked when they sat down again. "Those boys ran off to see Sophy before Edward could tell me anything." He supposed Frederick could not be blamed for wanting to be away from Lady Russell. Perhaps he had feared that if he did not take his brother away to see the babies, the new father would, and that would leave him alone with that woman. He had now been left with her himself, but he had not minded.

"Edward thought you might be here, even though Mrs Croft wrote you were going to Bath."

"There is that. What would you have done if we had not been here?" He supposed his wife's brother would be allowed to stay, but they could not have counted on that beforehand.

"I wondered about that too. Edward did not." She shrugged, as if she did not always receive a satisfactory explanation.

"Those Wentworths, they are never wrong," he said to her in a conspiratorial tone.

Sophia came in with her brothers, who were each carrying a basket. She ordered both to hold a baby while she greeted Mrs Wentworth and then she sat between her brothers. Anne had never seen all three of them together, but she liked the picture they made. Seated in a row they were clearly related. She also liked the care the uncles showed for their little nieces. They held them gingerly, but gently. Frederick's infant began to cry nevertheless, which caused him to look very alarmed.

"Oh, Frederick!" cried Sophia. "Did you do something to her foot?"

He laughed, but he handed her back to his sister. "I think she likes you better."

"Anne," Lady Russell said, turning towards Anne. She had been watching and listening all this while, but if this was turning into a family gathering she might prefer to take her leave. She would not do so without speaking to Anne first, however. "Could we speak for a moment?"

Anne walked to the other side of the room with her. They stood by the window and looked out. She supposed the topic was to be Frederick, but she would not be the one to bring him up first. If there was anything Lady Russell wished to ask, she should do so.

"It is settled then?" asked Lady Russell at last. "The thought of Bath seemed to distress you."

"My father will be indifferent at best. Must I really go and tell him? The admiral suggested a note, but I suppose the proper way is to wait for weeks until someone is able to take me to Bath -- and I really do not want to wait for weeks." She wanted to be married as soon as possible. Nothing should be allowed to prevent it.

"Pray what would be in this note?" She had her suspicions, considering that Sir Walter had to be told. There were not many things Anne would be required to tell him in person.

"That I am going to be married." She kept a close eye on Lady Russell's face. It could not be much of a surprise. He was here and she had seen him. Lady Russell might not have seen him touch or sit beside Anne, but the atmosphere was far from strained. It had to be evident that matters were settled. She was even openly being treated as a member of the family.

"He…" Lady Russell turned back to look at Frederick. He was not what she remembered, although it remained to be seen how he would conduct himself in different situations that did not involve infants. However, it was probably those situations that involved infants that increased his appeal for Anne. "Will he make you happy?"

Somehow Anne was grateful for that question. "He will. Oh no," she said involuntarily when she noticed three figures approaching through the park. "Admiral, it is my sister!"

He joined them by the window, appraised the situation and turned back to the room. "Frederick, it is the parrots! You still have time to flee."

"I cannot always flee," Frederick said with a frown as he came to look. It was time to make matters clear. He was going to marry Anne.

"I still advise you to. We shall be rid of them faster if you do. Oh, and young women always like infants, so they might linger. Take those with you too."

He could not see himself take two baskets and hide somewhere. They would cry and what would he do then? "Sophia will really trust both of them to me, do you not think so? I swear the one who cried was the one we undressed. She dislikes me now."

He loved Frederick for providing him with such perfect opportunities. "That is what you get if you undress girls, Frederick."

"She was my first. How was I to know?" he said for Lady Russell's benefit. She was still eyeing him with some wariness. "I think I should stay."

"I cannot," Anne spoke. "I shall…take out the gig." She turned with a swirl of her skirts.

"The gig?" Frederick and Lady Russell asked in unison, but Anne did not look back.

"This is not the first time I am wondering what happened to her," Frederick confessed with a look of amazement. He had truly heard her say she would take out the gig. She would not be anybody's passenger. "Is she serious? Will you let her take out the gig?"

"She is not a child and she is not my daughter," Admiral Croft answered and he was glad he could say this. "I have no say in the matter."

"But --" Frederick looked at Anne just exiting the room. She had walked full of purpose and determination. She was serious. "I cannot let her." He set off in pursuit. She would drive into hedges and ditches if he did not prevent her and she would break more than an arm.

"We men are delightfully easy to manipulate," the admiral said to Lady Russell.

"Anne!" Frederick's longer strides caught up with her in the passage that led to the side door. He had seen her slip into it, but he had first gone to get his coat.

"Are you coming with me?" asked in surprise. "I thought you wanted to stay."

"Who would drive you otherwise?"

"Oh, Frederick." She hurried on, eager to be out of sight of the front hall. She was pulling on her gloves and when she had done so, she took his arm. "She was your first?"

"I shall make you my second."

"I am glad you did not say that in front of Lady Russell!" Lady Russell would be even more shocked than she was and she at least had this shock tempered by some excitement.

"I should have."

"Why did you undress your niece?" Anne said to keep her thoughts off herself and where or when the undressing was going to occur. "Did she smell?"

"She looked rather bad when she came out. I needed to see whether she was normal now. I was…" He paused for a few seconds and then his voice was filled with awe. "It does make one wonder, does it not? What they really feel when they look upon what they have made." Of course, that was only when they were quiet and clean.

"Yes…I love them and I did not even make them." She imagined the feeling would be even stronger for a parent and she wondered if she was going to be one some day.

"Today Sophia also loves everybody she did not make." When his sister had expressed this sentiment he had given her an odd look.

"That cannot be of a long duration if my sister is calling on her. Sophia became rather angry one time, I thought." She had no wish to see her sister misbehave again, or even to see Louisa talk to Frederick. She wanted to be away.

That surprised him. "I have not often seen her angry."

"I thought it had to do with my sister wanting me to look after her children here."

Frederick turned towards her. "Here? With your injuries? I can well understand Sophia becoming angry with such a request."

Anne did not think it had very much to do with her. "I thought it was because she could not have children herself that she could not bear to hear someone was willing to be rid of them, but of course at the time she knew she could. They were probably kicking her as she spoke."

"But they did not come easily, so I see what you mean nonetheless. I am glad you and Sophia like each other."

"Yes, I like Sophia -- and she is really trying to mind her words around me."

He wondered why that was necessary. "What does she say?"

"I am used to it now, but the first time she said she would see if the admiral had undressed for bed she really shocked me."

"Because you sleep fully clothed," he nodded. He had already heard about Anne's shock from Sophia, so he was not at all surprised. "I know you do. Is this a local habit?"

"Frederick!" she laughed helplessly. "I know nothing about other people's habits. Wait. I know Sophia's, since I have shared with her. Perhaps my habits are ordinary. Nightgown," she mumbled.

"But not in front of me…" he said teasingly.

"You make me wonder now," Anne said in all seriousness. "If that had made any difference."

He could wonder too. "Perhaps not as much as if you had offered the other half of your bed."

"Oh, Frederick." She looked alarmed. "Please do not say this near the stables."

He was genuinely surprised by that request. "Why not? What do the stables have to do with it?"

"There are always people about. If you have any more to say, you must save that for later."

"Perhaps, considering your many visitors and Anne's departure, I should take my leave," said Lady Russell, who felt rather taken aback by Anne's running away. "Mrs Croft will need her rest."

The admiral did not worry very much about her yet. "There is nothing like a visit from the parrots to drive Mrs Croft to seek that rest."

"The parrots?" She had deduced who they were, but not why.

"The young women you saw approaching. They have been bothering us repeatedly at breakfast time, chattering away without waiting for replies, all at once. Very annoying."

"You do not like them," she stated.

"There are many young women I do not like." As he spoke, he wondered into what kind his daughters would grow. He would probably like them. "Except those in my family."

She could not leave without at least bringing it up. "Anne said she will be married."

"Yes, she will."

"I wanted to speak to her about that, but she went outside." Lady Russell still looked nonplussed.

"She fears your opinion. Or perhaps she felt she would be annoyed to too great an extent by the parrots." That could happen even to Anne.

"Considering my advice in the past…" said Lady Russell. She could imagine Anne being afraid of her opinion. "But I do not yet have a proper opinion. Circumstances have changed. People have changed." She could not yet reconcile the captain's dangerous character to his willingness to hold newborns.

He did not know what she had first thought of Frederick, so saying he had not changed much was probably not a good plan. "If I may be so presumptuous as to compare the two men I have seen taking an interest in Anne…"

"Two?" she asked sharply.

"The other was the heir to a baronetcy, which would make his background perhaps better suited to the daughter of a baronet," he said reflectively, "but alas, he lacked morals -- in my very judgemental opinion, naturally."

"It is no surprise you would speak in favour of your wife's brother."

"I knew him before I knew her, although he was not grown up and she was. Or so she says. She was only twenty-three. But since I married his sister I cannot be expected to think meanly of his upbringing." He glanced at the door where the parrots were shown in. "Are daughters of baronets truly such a superior sort?"

Not even Lady Russell could think that of Mary, so she stayed silent.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Posted on Sunday, 27 August 2006

"But you need not be concerned," Admiral Croft said to Lady Russell. He still had a few moments before he might be required to play host, although he was all for putting it off for as long as he could. "If we recognise that Anne is worthy of him, he must be worthy of Anne."

This was a sort of logic that she needed to ponder.

"I was once in almost the same situation," he continued. "I had no money. I could offer her nothing but my company and my cabin. If we had had a child in our first two years, we should have been in great trouble. Young people never think of that, do they?"

"Rarely," she agreed.

"Her father never objected. I wonder what he was thinking, but he was probably glad to see her provided for in whatever way before he died. But Frederick's current situation is very different."

"Yes," she answered. She supposed it was. He appeared to be very rich and he would certainly be able to provide for Anne, to give her anything she wished. Even siblings. She had not failed to notice that these future siblings appreciated Anne much more than her real ones. "Her mother was my close friend. Anne is most like her and the most deserving."

"Not a fact I will dispute."

"But you will also say your wife's brother is the most deserving of men?"

"No, I am," he said with a wink. "Still, Frederick is good enough to deserve a wife who is almost as good as mine."

"Almost!" she spluttered.

Frederick had automatically taken the reins after he had helped Anne in, but she took them back. "Thank you," she said.

"Anne…" He was too stunned to do anything. "What…"

"I have taken out the admiral a few times now. Sophia forbade him to take the reins after our accident, you see. If Sophia can drive, so can I. We cannot be seen arguing in front of the stables," she said with a forced smile and set the carriage in motion.

He stared at her. She had been serious about going out with the gig and she had done it before. He was merely going to be a passenger.

"Are you scared?" she wondered and then decided to be bold. "You ought to trust your future wife."

"I do," he said without believing that much. He was still afraid.

"And can I trust you? Will you land beneath me if we fall out?" She remembered Sophia's absolute trust in that and she wanted the same.

"Beneath you?" He still stared. Was this Anne? Where was she getting these ideas?

"Not on top of me, no. To break my fall you should be beneath me. We shall likely not fall out, but all the same I should like to have your assurance." She spoke quietly and confidently, but there was a twinkle of amusement in her eyes.

"What…" He took a deep breath. "…has come over you?"

"I honestly have no idea," she laughed, but she felt it was something good. "Please, Frederick. Stop gaping at me as if you have never seen me before."

"You…never used to laugh, really laugh," he remarked in astonishment. "How could you want me if I do not know you?"

"You do know me. I am the same. Perhaps less perfect than you think."

"It is not imperfect to laugh."

"But why I laugh! What I think! Though I may not yet laugh in company and I may be able to restrain myself then." In his presence she could not, yet she thought that was how it should be. She still had to become used to such unchecked behaviour, though.

"Restrain yourself! You are the last person who would be in need of that!"

And he might once have been considered the first, she remembered -- reckless, eager, impulsive. All of that had become less, she would say, unless he was merely temporarily uncertain and insecure. "You have grown calmer. I am growing less calm. We may even be better suited today than…"

"I hope it was all good for something," he muttered, not convinced that it was. He could not overlook his own mistakes. How could mistakes be good for anything?

"I am certainly…" She considered it. "Very happy."

"So happy you would enjoy landing on top of me if we fell out?" Somehow that felt like the last thing Anne would enjoy, something so rough. Did happiness make her wild? But he could see she was not wild.

"It is not the landing. It might hurt you. It is knowing you will be there."

"I am willing, but I am not very skilled in falling out of carriages -- and please, let us not practise. I do not want you to be hurt."

"We are not going fast enough," she assured him. "Are you all right, Frederick?"

"Do you remember we went up there?" Anne pointed at Lovers' Hill. At the time it had been the epitome of naughtiness, to meet on a walk and to go up there together. She could smile at that now. It did not come close to having men climb into her window, even if even less had happened in the latter case.

"Yes. A little."

"It remained my favourite place. I have been up there often to think back and to imagine you were there. I closed my eyes and had my memories."

He took her hand. "I am sorry." It was his fault that she had had only that.

She squeezed his hand. "The admiral saw our initials, I think. He forbade me to go up there alone because it would not be good for me." It would not have been good for her if she had chosen to continue doing so instead of speaking to Frederick, but she was not certain it had done very much harm when he had not been here. It had allowed her to keep him in her thoughts and heart.

"He can be serious sometimes." He drew in his breath. "I am much better company than a few rocks -- eventually," he had to add for honesty's sake.

"I do not know how he could know why I went there. Although perhaps initials in a rock are similar to names on people," she mused, giving him a sly glance. "And he saw ours. I know he did, because of his not quite random comments."

"How do you know he has Sophia on his arm?" He had not thought of asking this when she had told him about that, but it was rather odd that she knew.

"They mean no harm, but they…" Anne sought the best way to lessen Frederick's disapproval. "They go about their domestic business without -- no, that is not true. She asked me if I minded half undressed sailors before I went in and I said yes, so she covered him up --"

"I beg your pardon?" he cried. "What were they doing?"

"She was cutting his hair, but the cape fell down and then I saw the tattoo. I asked if all sailors looked like that, but he answered…Frederick looks better."

He leant sideways to embrace her. "How you must have suffered!"

"He is not that frightful."

"Anne! Of course he is frightful if he immediately teases you with me! And there was nothing you could do, because I was still being a fool."

"Their teasing is not cruel," she protested. It was good that she was the one with the reins. She could stop the gig. He might have forgotten. "And I am occasionally able to shoot back."

"Indeed. Hearing to what you were subjected certainly explains that much better. Such provocations. They could not fail to affect even someone like you." He gave her a fond look.

Feeling there might be a kiss coming up and seeing they were in the middle of the lane, Anne offered a suggestion. "Shall we climb the hill?" Up there he might make it as lengthy as he chose. There would be nobody to see it.

"Yes, I think we should. You are not alone now." He climbed out and held out his arms. "And do I look better?"

"I think so, but Sophia was of course prejudiced in favour of the admiral."

"Love is blind." He lifted her out of the gig, but did not set her on her feet immediately. "I mean other people's love, not ours. I believe you are objective."

Anne wriggled herself onto the ground when he gazed into her eyes again affectionately. "Climb the hill first."

"Oh hey ho! Are you insane? Where the devil is the person who parked his shabby vehicle in the middle of the lane?" cried a voice.

It was indeed in such a place that it made it difficult for any other carriage to pass, but Anne had never seen anybody here except on foot. She now peered over a rock on the top of Lovers' Hill, down at an agitated Charles Musgrove. "Oh my…it is Charles. He wishes to pass with his carriage."

"Let him wait," said Frederick, not taking his eyes off what he was carving in the rock. "We are busy."

"Oh my, he is now climbing into the gig."

"I know this is Charles Musgrove, expert on all things with wheels and barrels, but not even he can drive two carriages at once. He takes ours, we take his." His voice was calm. There was no problem, except perhaps a mischievous desire to speed off with Musgrove's carriage that Anne would very likely not appreciate.

"Perhaps I could…" Anne contemplated getting up to prevent Charles from driving their gig too far away. Since she was seated on Frederick's lap because he had deemed the ground too dirty and cold for her, she was not too motivated to move.

Frederick grasped her around her waist to hold her in place with his left arm. "Your innocence decreases with every second you wait. He might think you needed this time to get dressed." Although he was not certain Musgrove ever thought very much.

She half looked aside. "In December? You will not even let me sit on the ground fully clothed."

He wondered if the month made any difference. "August?"

"We were here in the warmer months and it was not much different, but what did you think I sat on when I came here alone without such a gallant gentleman to protect my clothes?" Her eyes were still following Charles. "Oh, he is not leaving it too far away and he is coming back on foot."

"That is a pity," Frederick said regretfully. "I was growing rather tempted to capture his carriage."

Charles walked back, clearly muttering to himself and looking around. "Admiral!" he shouted. "Admiral? What the devil are you up to? You are too old to be up there!"

Anne ducked down and peered through a crack between two rocks. She giggled, because the admiral had been up here despite his presumed age.

"What do people do on Lovers' Hill that Musgrove thinks is not for older people?" Frederick wondered. "He may be mistaken about the admiral, given the undeniable proof we saw at home."

"Frederick!" she chided with a blush.

He studied her colour thoughtfully. "I always thought country girls were more sheltered than sailors, but perhaps they see quite as much."

"I hear more than I see," Anne revealed. "It comes of being quiet. Charles is giving up. He is setting his horses in motion."

Frederick finished the last letter. "How well-timed of him. Are you ready to descend?"

"Are you not afraid for my -- our innocence anymore?" She watched Charles slowly disappear from view. "I might have been attacking your virtue as well."

"That would be very interesting. But that it is December was a good point. It clears us from any suspicion of having undressed."

She coloured again upon hearing it would be very interesting. "I should think our characters cleared us as well. What would you do with a fine lady on top of a hill when you will not even take one onto a ship?"

"Oh!" he cried. "That is…"

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Posted on Wednesday, 30 August 2006

Given that Mary had always been thinking in terms of a litter of puppies and she had not related this news to Henrietta and Louisa, it never occurred to the new visitors that the two infants might be Sophia's. They were receiving much attention from Mr Wentworth and his wife, who were not interesting people, and Mary assumed they were theirs when they were really only practising.

"We came to see Anne," said Mary. "But she does not seem to be here."

"No, she does not seem to be," Sophia replied. She vaguely recalled Anne leaving the room, followed by Frederick, but she had no idea whether they were going to come back. She would not blame them if they did not return until Mary had left. There were more pleasant things to do for any couple, even more so for a newly engaged one. "She must have stepped out."

"I was quite surprised she appeared to have gone away with you, Mrs Croft, since Anne would rather not leave home."

Sophia wondered if she was now being accused of taking Anne against her will. She was prepared for any ridiculousness, though, and she could reply calmly. "Oh dear, in that case I feel flattered that she wanted to come with me."

"I was surprised to hear of it, since she never told me she had plans to leave. Did she tell you anything, Lady Russell?"

"Yes, she did." Lady Russell did not say more.

"Then why did she not tell me?" Mary complained. She was evidently not pleased with Lady Russell's answer. "I am her sister. Since she was staying with me, I had every right to hear where she was going."

"But you did hear, madam," said Admiral Croft. "Someone told you she was gone."

"But it was probably a servant, not Anne!"

He glanced at Sophia and he saw she had the same idea. Since when was Anne not considered a servant?

"Is your brother not here, Mrs Croft?" asked Louisa, who took advantage of the silence that followed upon Mary's words.

"That is my brother." Sophia nodded at Edward, who gave her a look that indicated that he wondered who these girls were and why they were interested in her brother.

Sophia did not think an announcement was in order if the engaged couple was absent. She was not their parent and their visitors had no right to know anything at any cost, although Mrs Musgrove evidently believed that she did. If they had heard anything -- and she assumed they did, or they would not be here -- it was up to them to take the first step.

So far the girls were not chattering, but Frederick was not there and strangers were present, which might keep them from saying too much.

"I did not meet you when I lived in the neighbourhood a few years ago," Edward said to them. "But perhaps I met your parents. You must have been at school."

The admiral grinned widely at him when he saw such a reminder of their ages was not appreciated. And Edward did not even know what he was about. He started to pace the room, pretending to be lost in thought. He was, but he was not oblivious to the conversations that went on between the others.

One of the two girls asked Edward if his brother had indeed stayed with him. The answer was affirmative. Mrs Musgrove was still complaining about Anne and Sophia's stare was becoming vacant. Lady Russell appeared to be ashamed of Mary's bad manners, but she could do nothing to stop her.

He could not decide whether to listen to Edward relate how many women Frederick had met in Shropshire, or to rescue Sophia. Edward -- and his wife -- seemed to be doing fine with these fabrications, however, whereas Sophia looked ready to die of irritation. Her patience was wearing thin.

He sat beside Sophia, although he regretted having to give up eavesdropping on Mrs Wentworth's list of Shropshire females. From Edward's expression he deduced that she was the one with the greater imagination. It was undoubtedly amusing, but Sophia's expression indicated an immediate need for action. "Did you know, I saw your father in Bath," he informed Mrs Musgrove, interrupting whatever she had been saying. It could not possibly have been important.

"Did you?" she cried. "What did he say?"

"He made me a compliment on my hair." He smiled at her look. Either she did not agree with her father or she did not know him well.

"Oh." She looked blank for a second. "Did Anne see my father as well?"

"Oh, yes."

"Has Anne been to Bath? Did she bring any message for me?"

"Are you expecting news from Bath?" He kept his voice polite.

"Not as such, but if everyone has been speaking to my father I cannot see why there should not be any message for me." Mary looked displeased at having been overlooked.

Sophia's eyes bulged. "I cannot see why there should," she said sharply.

"Now, Sophy, fathers may like to send their daughters a message," said her husband. "Perhaps you ought to go to Bath yourself and partake of all its enjoyments," he suggested to Mrs Musgrove. "And see your father and attend one of his evening parties. They are all the rage in Bath."

"Did Anne?" she asked jealously.

"Anne and I did," he nodded.

"You and Anne and not Mrs Croft?"

"I cannot walk two ladies to a party," he said, as if that was obvious.

"Oh, you walked." That impressed Mary less than Anne's having been walked to an evening party by a man. It was Admiral Croft, but it was nevertheless a gentleman of some standing and furthermore not Anne's husband, so that all eyes would have been upon her. Such a thing would never happen to Mary if she arrived with Charles. "But I thought Anne did not walk?" she remembered.

"Then obviously I either carried Anne or dragged her through Bath, or it was not very far."

"Carried," Mary echoed. "No, I am sure my father would not have approved of his daughter being carried."

He wished to say it would all be approved as long as his hair looked fine, but refrained.

"Was Captain Wentworth also at this evening party?"

"He was very likely at an evening party in Shropshire at the same time." Or, considering when he had appeared, on his way to Bath.

"Perhaps, if Anne is not here, I should go," Mary said after she had debated with herself for a few moments. "I came to see her. Henrietta? Louisa? Are you ready?"

Henrietta could not say she was not, since she had only come along to provide company to the others. Louisa, in the absence of Captain Wentworth, had no further business here either.

"Now I am tired," Sophia said when they were all gone, including Lady Russell. "And I had been thinking I loved everybody today. I could not ask where Anne and Frederick have gone, but where are they?"

"Frederick did not think Anne could drive the gig," said the admiral. "I suppose he believes he must protect her from harm by going with her."

"But…?"

"I very much hope she will not give him the reins." The admiral took Mrs Wentworth's baby when it began to cry and made soothing noises at it.

"You are quite the expert already!" Edward said in awe. He was sure he would not know what to do.

"Well, there are two. One for her, one for me. And I had a lot of practice during the night. I hope you will not take this personally, Edward, but I want to rest for a few hours as well because of my night duties. Could you amuse yourselves?"

"Something has been bothering me," Sophia spoke. "Do you not recall that I sent a note to Mr Musgrove about the bassinet? And that I even received a reply from him? Yet Mrs Musgrove comes here and behaves as though she knows nothing. She never said a word about the babies and seemed to think they were Edward's!"

"Edward's!" he scoffed. "When they clearly have my hair."

"James, you are going grey and they are wearing hats." Nobody could even see their hair -- and it was a moot point anyhow because nobody had even looked at them. Her maternal pride had been severely wounded.

He was not listening. "Why did we not make the parrots believe the twins were Frederick's? Can we still do so?"

"I am not certain he would appreciate the implication," said Edward.

"But what of all these ladies you said he met in Shropshire?"

They had not exactly lied, but they had not been exactly truthful either. "Most were well beyond the age of child-bearing."

"How would you know that?" He sounded genuinely interested.

Edward gave him an uncomprehending look. "How would you not know that? Do they have grey old ladies at sea who give birth?"

"Does your acquaintance consist of many such ladies, Edward?"

"Oh, stop it!" Sophia cried. "No matter whose children they were assumed to be, nobody had any interest in my little sweeties! They ought to be interesting no matter who their parents are. I can understand how I could not be interesting, but --"

"Sophy, my dear, we are going to lie down," the admiral decided. "You are talking nonsense."

Anne smiled, but she did not ask if he had changed his mind about having women on board. It was not yet relevant, since he was not going anywhere in the near future.

"What I meant was -- no," Frederick decided. "If you are in such an impertinent mood, may we return to the matter of the other side of the bed, please? I was going to say it might have made a difference, but you would not let me finish. Your proximity --"

"Do not say it!" she said hurriedly. "Because I do not want to know how it could be closer than being carried or sitting."

He did not care that she did not want to know. "The same, but then lying down -- and longer. I imagine."

"You do not know? You imagine?" she said in a hopeful tone.

"Oh, frequently." He caught her astonished expression. "Shall I need to carry you down now? You look overcome."

Anne leant against the rock. "No, no. What have you been imagining?"

Her interest spurred him on. She was intrigued rather than shocked and he liked it, although he could not yet give her a detailed answer. "Things you would not have done, but that are pleasant to think about anyhow."

She had no idea what that might be. "But…does that mean you think I will never do the things you find pleasant?" That was a little disconcerting. She did not want to disappoint him another time by rejecting him in some sense.

"What sort of logic is that? No, I think you would not have done them at that particular time." He placed his hands on either side of her. "Frederick! Come and sleep beside me. I have loved you forever. Or some variation thereof. You are very creative in my imagination," he said with a grin.

Anne gasped. "That is what you have been imagining?" She told herself not to be surprised. She had imagined different follow-ups to their kiss herself. It was not odd that he had been doing almost the same.

"Later. Not at the time. If I had been imagining anything at the time I would probably have acted it out." It would have saved them some time if he had done that. Anne did not at all appear to be opposed to such things.

"And then? Did you think on?" she asked curiously, her colour deepening because of the trouble into which she might be getting herself. It was impossible not to ask the question, though. "What would happen after I invited you?"

"Not much more," he confessed. Inevitably he always ended up asking himself the same question and that was when it stopped being agreeable.

Anne would like to know what he liked, so that she might do it at some point. She had no idea what people did in such situations. "So, not much more is what is pleasant to think about? Or are you trying to be proper to me by not telling me everything?"

"Even in my wildest imagination you would not do something improper and that is why I could not think on."

"I take it you do not consider sitting in your lap and kissing you very improper." She had done both willingly without wondering about them too much. While they were not exactly proper, she did not know how she could be married without them. If she did not want to do them, she would not love him enough. Of course she could still be strong, but she was not.

"Well…" he said slowly. "Considering that I was only warned not to be rough-handed with you and perhaps not to spend the night in your room -- although I could have been mistaken about his message there -- I think that everything done in a gentle manner is allowed. And therefore proper."

"Yes, that fits with what he said to me," Anne answered. She could not say it fit with other people's opinions, yet she was beginning to lean towards these permissive standards. "But I should rein you in a little, he said."

Frederick looked a little indignant. He had been showing too little rather than too much affection, he would say. "Has it been necessary?"

"Not yet. Not really. Apart from directing you up this hill."

"It is very odd," he said reflectively. "How their opinion changed so suddenly. Every evil is now encouraged -- as long as I do it gently! And you seem more willing to talk to me about it than this morning," he observed.

"Well, that was very sudden! And I did not want to give you the full explanation." Their conversation now was different.

"Why not? Because you think I should know?"

"No, because I think we should not yet act upon it. But do you know?" she asked in spite of herself.

"You seem to think I do not, because I have not yet acted upon it." Frederick wondered about it as he spoke. Was acting the consequence of knowing? "Not really."

"Because you are supposed to be in love with me and talking will give you ideas. You might not act, but certainly imagine." If she was already doing this a little, everyone else's imaginations must be running wild in the same situation, Anne reasoned.

"You are right and you are wrong," he answered. "Though not about my supposedly being in love with you. By the way, did you say we should not yet act upon it? Are you in any danger of acting?"

Anne giggled a little and walked down the hill as quickly as her ankle allowed.

Chapter Forty

Posted on Saturday, 2 September 2006

"Anne and Captain Wentworth were not there and nobody mentioned them," Mary Musgrove complained at home. She was happy to find Charles so obliging as to be home for once when she had something to say. "Now I still know nothing."

"How stupid of you not to ask directly." Charles would not have cared enough to ask, but he knew that if he had cared, he would have asked. It was what sensible and even less sensible people did.

"Have you any idea how embarrassing it is to say that Anne told me, her sister, nothing!" Mary cried. "I have the first right to information. I should really not like to be told about such an important thing by my father's tenants."

Charles still did not care very much and he looked bored with the Elliot pride. "I thought you went there so they could tell you."

She began to look hopeful. "Perhaps they told me nothing because they know nothing. Lady Russell knows something, I am sure, but she would not tell me anything. But I feel she should be as loyal to me as to Anne and tell me. Do you not think so?"

He did not care about Lady Russell either. "I wonder to whom you spoke, since Admiral Croft was out with his gig and Mrs Croft cannot have been receiving visitors." In his experience such women would be recovering for months. The last thing they would do was receive Mary and his sisters.

"He was there and she was there. They were both there."

"His gig went out alone?" Charles pondered that. Such gigs had not yet been invented and he very much doubted that Admiral Croft would have the latest novelty in the carriage business anyhow. "No, Captain Wentworth must have been out with the gig. He is the only other man in the house and although he is not a carriage man, I think, obviously someone parked it who did not know how. He was out with Anne, I am sure. There is your answer. As for Mrs Croft, her being there is obvious proof she cannot leave her husband alone, but she must guide him at all times."

Mary heard only one thing. "Out with Anne?"

"Now that I think about it," said Charles when he saw the perfect way to have some fun, "the gig was at the foot of Lovers' Hill. They probably went up together. It is no wonder nobody responded to my shouts."

"My sister?" Mary cried. "Now, Charles! I know you must be terribly miffed that she snared Captain Wentworth away from your sisters, but that does not yet make her a…a…"

"I am only glad my sisters have been spared this fate." He chuckled. "I know exactly what sort of rake that captain is! He told me about it himself." The captain was a very odd sort of fellow who wished to live with his sister. It was very likely that he would end up as boring as Admiral Croft, not to mention rather stingy. Now that he thought about it, not at all the sort of man for his sisters. It was no wonder that the man had chosen someone like Anne. And they were probably up there for the view.

Mary gasped. "Tell me!"

"No, I shall not tell you things another gentleman told me in confidence," he said cheerfully.

"You said we as if you were my equal in this matter," Frederick said, catching Anne to stop her from descending. It was not only interest; he was also afraid she would stumble.

She did not know whether to dislike that he was quick, not after having wished for it for so long. "Yes, I may be."

"Is this reticence self-protection?" he wondered.

She gave him a dramatic sigh. "Yes. I am turning into a sort of Sophia. She warned me about that already and I thought she was teasing, but she was right. I shall end up being indiscreetly devoted and making innocent young women wonder about the pleasant things with which I distracted my husband."

He tried not to focus on the fact that she was saying odd things, but on the odd things she was saying. "Devoted is good. Distracting your husband with pleasant things is also good, whatever they are. Where is the badness?"

"It is perhaps in my having thought I would do exactly the same to keep my husband from washing overboard -- until I discovered what it was precisely. The irony." She chuckled wryly at her own ignorance and the dilemma she would face -- would she or would she not?

Frederick laughed at her concerned expression. "However, I strongly suspect Sophia does not have to resort to the heavy guns to make him do what she wants and he would not even let her do something distressing, so I am assuming she did not do anything that was particularly distressing to her."

"It would be to me," Anne muttered.

"And what makes you think that your husband's response would not be to return the pleasantness in an equal measure?" He would not let her do anything distressing either, as much as he could mock his brother-in-law.

"The nature of it."

Frederick raised his eyebrows in a questioning manner. "But you said you wondered what it was."

"After a little frankness from the admiral I no longer wonder. He gave me a different piece of the same puzzle. And I am not incapable of piecing things together. Unfortunately for me."

"Neither am I. Really, would he like something Sophia did not like?" He could not imagine it. It was Sophia.

"Er…thunderstorms?" Anne suggested after a moment.

"That is something else and you know it. You think too much and you are perhaps piecing the wrong things together," Frederick decided. They needed to combine their pieces. "I am beginning to realise the merits of his suggestion."

"What was his suggestion?"

"To speak to you. You can tell me much more than he can. I am not marrying him, you see. I need to know about you." He remembered something. "We may need to share a room first. I was told you cannot know a girl until you share."

"How do you propose we share a room if we are not married and if the admiral is on patrol during the night?" They would be better off spending time with each other during the day. In fact, they would be better off not discussing this at all, but Anne found herself drawn to these subjects again and again. She could only blame Frederick, for she had never been interested in these matters on her own.

"Oh Anne," he said with a sigh. "Such encouragement from you and discouragement from him will only lead to trouble, did you know? It makes me want to try it anyhow, to try and reach your room unseen!"

"I did not really mean it as encouragement," she needed to point out.

Frederick's eyes sparkled with excitement. "Too late. You know I will try now."

Anne tried to temper his enthusiasm. "But what if I do not want you to? Would you like something I did not like?"

"Then I shall go away instantly after having succeeded. But I will try. That cannot harm you."

She shook her head and looked away. If he appeared in such a state, full of excitement and glee, she was not certain she would have the power to send him away. No, she was certain she would not. She would like him and she would let him get away with rather more than she ought, especially if he said he would go away.

"See, you will not mind," he said.

There must be something she could say, something sensible and cautionary, and she struggled to find it. "I should not like to find you under my window with a broken leg."

Frederick opened his eyes wide. "How would I come by a broken leg?"

"Should I tell Mary, do you think?" Anne asked when they neared the turnoff to Uppercross. She forced herself to think of serious matters again.

"Not about my excursion, unless you wish her dead." Speaking these words he felt seized by a great desire to shock Mary, perhaps with something else.

"That we will be married. She may write to my father instantly and I do not know what he might say then. She does not always write objectively."

"I suppose I could see your father and break the news to him myself," Frederick mused. He would do much for Anne, even speak to Sir Walter Elliot in a civilised manner.

Such a course of action had not yet occurred to Anne. "And ask him?"

"Ask him? I am not going to ask him anything. I shall tell him we are going to marry, whether he likes it or not. Asking him is ridiculous."

She still had to grow used to that determination as well. Of course he would no longer ask. She was old enough not to need permission.

"Would you like your sister to be present or should I speak to your father alone? I am not sure how these things are done in general, but my captain did not care that we were there. He correctly assumed that Edward and I already knew. My father, on the other hand, thought he had developed a wish to marry Sophia between the soup and the chocolate cake and might actually have withheld his consent if he had had any to give."

There must not be any room for doubt, although she did not think her father would withhold his consent because he believed her feelings might not have been consulted. "And thus you think it is better to say the matter is already settled?"

"Well, it is."

"Should I not come with you?" She hesitated and tried to decide whether her presence was required. She had no more power over her father than he had. "When will you go?"

"As soon as possible, if you wish, but I shall not be away long. Perhaps you had best stay with Sophia. You showed her how to dress her babies, did you not? There might be more she does not know. She is sweet, but she will manage better when their clothes are larger."

Anne did not think it was quite so bad. Besides, the clothes were large enough; the babies were the ones who were too small for them.

"But if you want to tell Mary…" He studied her doubtful expression. Mary needed the hard truth. "I shall tell Mary. Take the turn. You must let me handle it."

"I called on you earlier, Anne," Mary greeted them with a suspicious look. "But you were not there. Were you out together?"

"Of course we did not meet on your doorstep, Mrs Musgrove," Frederick answered amiably. "But because you are my sweet Anne's sister I can share the secret with you."

These words, accompanied by his laying his arm around Anne's waist, could not fail to work. Mary gasped.

Anne would almost do the same, but she had been forewarned. He would handle the situation and she would not have to do anything. However, she would never have guessed he would do this. He certainly had a greater appreciation for the arts than his sister and no fear of anything that daunted Anne. She was glad for the latter and she would also have been glad for his arm around her waist had there been nobody to see it.

"We are going to be married," he continued with a brilliant and affectionate smile at his future wife.

That was no act, Anne decided. He meant what he conveyed with his smile. As a consequence she could not fail to appear equally besotted, even without trying.

It took Mary only a few moments to realise what was truly important about such a marriage. "What a wedding! A carriage! A house!"

"Kellynch," said Frederick. He sat Anne down beside him.

Mary had to sit down too. She was only mistress of Uppercross Cottage and if Anne got Kellynch she would lose her superiority. "Mistress of Kellynch? But you have used me so ill by never breathing a word of it! Does anybody else know?" The news might be more palatable if nobody else knew and if she was the one who could tell everybody.

"My relatives, naturally, because they are quite particular about whom they would allow into the family."

"So are we!" Mary exclaimed. She got up again to pace the room, hardly knowing whether such a connection was a good or a bad thing.

Frederick gave Anne a kiss -- on her hand, but she begged him with her eyes to behave nevertheless. If she encouraged him, he might choose another, higher spot on which to bestow his affections next time. Obviously he was not afraid of appearing improper when other considerations were more important. Anne was suddenly very conscious of her bare neck.

"Anne! You have used us ill indeed!" Mary pressed her hands to her chest. "You have been courting all this while and none of us ever knew! In secret! Running off with the captain without our knowledge!"

"We have not yet run off," Anne corrected her, but it was useless. Her soft voice was drowned in the sound of Mary's agitation.

"In Lyme…what did you do in Lyme?" Mary remembered Charles idea that they must have been alone in Lyme. Alone in Lyme! With Captain Wentworth! One wondered what had happened. He was a sailor and they were said to be very scandalous.

"Lyme," Frederick said lazily. "I am sorry. I am not at liberty to say, as you will understand."

Anne thought Mary loved such responses, in a way, although she appeared vexed. "Frederick," she whispered. She tried to ignore that his hand was not at all unobtrusively creeping onto her thigh. He wanted Mary to see it. That was clear. "Where did you acquire this caddish behaviour?"

"No, my darling, I shall not tell her anything," he whispered back far too loudly, as if Anne had begged him to be silent about their adventures.

She hid her face behind her hands, but it also deprived her of the chance to see the shock from which Mary now had to recover.

"It does not require any skill to appear a cad to your sister," Frederick whispered in her ear. "You need not be concerned." He rose. "We must move on, Mrs Musgrove. I am delighted that you are happy with the news."

"Was that not easy?" he asked smugly when they drove off again. He had taken the reins because Anne had looked rather overwhelmed. "Now she knows."

Anne hoped the cold air would cool her cheeks. "You are such a cad." She had been thinking she was bad, but he could be worse if he put his mind to it.

"Cads do worse things than kiss your hand," he said in amusement.

"Such as? They will try to reach my room at night?" She was glad he had at least not brought that up in front of Mary, although her sister was probably assuming it had already happened. In Lyme. And it had, too.

"I have a few rakish acquaintances, but they do not try. Real cads usually manage to get themselves invited." As he spoke, he wondered if she was going to misconstrue that. He was not looking for an invitation.

"But not by real ladies," she had to point out. She was a real lady, or at least she was trying to be one for as long as she managed.

"They might have been real ladies before the invitation, but afterwards they are certainly not," Frederick agreed.

"How do you know all that?" Anne asked a little suspiciously.

"What is a conquest if you have no one to whom to boast of it?"

"Oh." She pondered that. "And do they tell you everything?"

"How much they tell me depends on how drunk they are and how much interest I have in the story, but it is never everything, nor is it very…" He shrugged.

"Oh. Suppose you were to try, in spite of not being encouraged, shall I remain a real lady in spite of your desire to fool the admiral?"

Frederick looked surprised. "Of course. Because I am not a cad. Besides, my purpose in going there would not be you, but arriving there unseen."

Chapter Forty-One

Posted on Tuesday, 5 September 2006

"I should finish my conversation with Lady Russell," said Anne when Kellynch Lodge came into view. It had not been well-mannered of her to leave so suddenly. Lady Russell might have been left with a dissatisfied feeling and a few questions. "You could stay outside, but if you promise to behave…"

He would. "I would not kiss your hand in front of her." Although he would be content to leave the conversation unfinished, he understood how it could bother Anne. It might furthermore look odd if she left him outside. That would imply he had absolutely no desire to meet Lady Russell. His desire was indeed not great, but he would be civil for Anne's sake.

"I do not truly think it is misbehaving," Anne had to explain, "but she is not used to such displays of affection."

"Neither am I."

Anne stopped the gig at Kellynch Lodge. She was nervous going there with Frederick in tow, more nervous than she had been with Sophia. She could not help straightening his clothes before they were shown in, something that amused him.

"Our conversation was interrupted. I am sorry," she said hesitantly. She was acutely aware that nothing had passed between the other two but a cold and civil greeting. "But I did not think we were finished. We are going to be married."

"Yes, you told me earlier," Lady Russell answered quietly. She was glad Anne had come to elaborate on that comment, even if she had brought Captain Wentworth.

"And…" Anne did not really know what else to say. She did not think she needed to explain why they were going to be married, but it might be appreciated if she said she was not going away. Not much would change, in fact, except that she would have a husband. "We shall live at Kellynch."

"Will Admiral and Mrs Croft move elsewhere?" Lady Russell was surprised. They had seemed pleased with their home and could not be thinking of relocating with their two infants.

"No, we can all live there."

"That would be very good for you." A man who would allow Anne to remain in her favourite home certainly rose in her estimation. She finally looked at Frederick. He was wealthy enough to rent or buy a large house of his own. Was this his wish too or had Anne persuaded him? "Would you not wish to have your own house?"

"I get along perfectly with my sister," he answered. And nobody would be left alone if there was another war, but speaking of a separation even before they were together was something he did not think he could do yet. At the moment he wished that time would never come, although at some point he might feel eager for action again.

"So do I," Anne added. "His sister, I mean, not mine."

"I had noticed. Mary…" Lady Russell wondered what she should say about Mary or if that was even necessary. They all knew her.

"We have just spoken to Mary. She knows now."

"She does not like to be left out. I am sure she will take it upon herself to inform the other Musgroves before you could do so yourself. Louisa will suffer some disappointment."

Frederick could only feel vexed by such a remark. "Surely no greater disappointment or grief than what made me get this many years ago!" He stood up and showed her something, whereupon he had the satisfaction of seeing Lady Russell faint.

"I suppose I should not have done that," Frederick spoke when Anne was busy trying to revive Lady Russell. He regretted his thoughtless outburst. He had said he would not kiss her hand, but he had done something far worse. Anne had said nothing. By the time he had glanced at her, she had already approached Lady Russell. "Are you angry with me, Anne?"

"No. But it might be best if you waited for me outside." She abandoned Lady Russell for a moment to stand in front of him. "Please? I should be better at making your apologies without you present."

"I am not sorry."

"I know. That is why you should let me talk."

Lady Russell opened her eyes not long after he was gone. "Oh, Anne!" she said in distress.

"I am sorry. I did not know he was going to do such a thing, or I would have stopped him and told him not everybody was equal to the sight," Anne apologised. "I am sorry it shocked you."

She would almost faint again at Anne's calm voice. "You make it sound as if it did not shock you in the least!"

It had indeed not shocked her. That he had done it here had perhaps shocked her more than what he had done, but it had not been very much. "I had seen it before."

That was still extremely distressing and Lady Russell remained horizontal. "I do not know what to say. What sort of man do you wish to marry?"

Anne bit her lip. She was marrying a good man and she did not have to wonder why he had done what he had done, because he had done it before. "I think that was his way of saying that he never recovered from our broken engagement. It would have been more proper to use words, but perhaps he did not think they would convince you quite as much, or they did not come to him instantly. I do not know."

"And he showed this…this…to you before?"

"Yesterday. Not more, only that." She blushed because she had to make that clear, but at least she could do it herself without Frederick's dubious assistance. "He did not undress entirely, I mean. He is not that bad. He is very proper, truly."

"Very proper! Not that bad," Lady Russell echoed in shock. "This was quite bad enough! And you are making excuses for this bad behaviour."

She would never make excuses for truly bad behaviour. "I agree it would have been wiser to tell you he felt deeply hurt, but such strong feelings do not always lead to calm actions." And she was apparently only a calming influence after the outburst, not before.

"Anne." Lady Russell shook her head. "I realise it is your character, but for certain types of behaviour there is no excuse. He practically exposed himself to me."

"His heart only." She remembered calling it his character to Admiral Croft and she was silent for a few seconds. Although she still believed it was more adequately described by these terms, an outsider might not see it as such. "And perhaps a tiny little bit of his hip."

"That tiny little bit was much more than I ever cared to see of Captain Wentworth or indeed of any man!"

"I can only say I am sorry you fainted," Anne said in a small voice. She was shocked by her immediate thought that she would rather see much more of Captain Wentworth and she could only be very happy that she had had the presence of mind not to voice it.

"And you will marry him anyhow." She did not suppose Anne had fainted. No, Anne thought such behaviour was perfectly acceptable -- Anne, her favourite of the Elliot girls, whose character and conduct had always been impeccable.

"Yes." She was quite determined. "So it cannot signify that I saw the tiniest little bit of him."

Lady Russell thought she might have to resign herself to the inevitable. Today's young people had different norms. The heart ruled the head. "Can you not train him to express his feelings in words?"

Anne's lip began to tremble. "I will try."

"Please do. I have no desire to faint every time he comes to visit," her godmother said sternly.

"Well?" Frederick asked with rather more anxiety than he liked. Anne looked more or less cheerful and that was odd. He had been fearing something else, although this was very good.

"She has no desire to faint every time you come to visit, so she asked me to train you to express your feelings in words." Anne considered that very close to approbation and acceptance. Certainly the way Lady Russell had thanked her for kind care after she had fainted must mean she was still as well-liked as ever.

"If I may be so annoying, it was expressed in words." He wanted to look relieved, but he was still hesitant. "And did you talk her into this mildness or was my behaviour simply not as bad as we feared?" He had been trying imagine what he would think if he saw someone behave in the same manner, but he had not been able to find good excuses for it.

"I do not know."

"You help me with the people with whom I struggle and the reverse," he noted in wonder, comparing this visit to that at Mary's. "It is always nice to have real proof that I need you and that I am not merely wishing and imagining that I do."

"Do you?" Anne asked happily.

"Yes, I do." He lifted her into the gig. "I cannot be trusted on my own, can I?"

"After we are married," Frederick began as he studiously seated himself in a chair in the drawing room. He could broach this topic now all his relatives seemed to have retired. They had left all six of them here, but none were left now. "We should perhaps address the question of where we are to…er...of whether you would prefer to…er…yes, what you would prefer."

Anne took a chair next to him and looked at him thoughtfully. "How would it reflect on me if I understood you?"

"Do you?" That relieved him. It had been surprisingly difficult to say anything comprehensible, although his thoughts had been clear.

"Ah, it reflects well. If I did."

"Do you not?"

She brushed something off her gown. She was not certain what her reaction ought to be, so she shrugged. A proper lady could not be direct, she supposed, or could a proper lady not be encouraging? And would such a gentleman even require a proper lady?

Frederick was a little frustrated. They had seemed to make much progress earlier. "Anne…"

"But the matter on which you appear to be soliciting my opinion…" she began with a blush. "I could hardly say I have one."

"No, certainly not if I am asking you for it," he answered dryly. "Form one."

"I might have been forming one," she revealed. "I have been looking at other people and wondering which examples I should like to follow if I was ever given the chance. I have had ample time for that, several years."

"That takes much too long." He lifted her out of her chair and carried her upstairs. As long as he did not receive any protest it would be fine -- and he did not. She only looked up at him expectantly. He set her down in front of her door. "Show me your room."

After glancing in all directions and seeing no one, Anne opened the door and let him in. She had no idea what he wanted, but there was something agreeable about having the matter decided for her.

Frederick began to look into her drawers because there had been no invitation to move in. He would have to take some action himself. "There is not much room for me in here, is there?"

"Not for a whole husband," she agreed, tentatively guessing his intentions. "But perhaps for some of your clothing. Would you like to…live here?"

"I do. I am not attached to any particular room in this house. You are. Oh lord, what are you doing here?" he said to Admiral Croft. The man always materialised out of nowhere when he was least wanted or expected. "How did you know I was here?"

"I did not. I was going for a walk with number two." He nodded at the infant in his arms. "And I heard your voice."

"And you thought you had to see whether I was not doing anything to Anne."

"No. I found I could not sleep after all because of her and when I cannot, I am in need of company. This little one," he said, "takes after me. She becomes very distressed if I lay her down and stop talking. She also likes company."

"Fascinating," Frederick said flatly. He did not see why he should be chosen to provide this company. He would rather be alone with Anne to discuss their living arrangements. "Where is Sophia? And Edward?"

"You are not impressed, I see, but I will show you." He laid the baby on the bed and pressed a finger against his lips. It did not take long for the wailing to start, but he was quick to lift her up again and it stopped almost instantly. "See?"

"No, I hear," answered Frederick, still speaking in the same flat tone.

"She furthermore has my hair." He kissed her little bonnet, but no hair was visible. "Well, the colour it used to have when I was young. Sophy says I am going grey, but I am not sure of that."

"Again, fascinating."

Anne was more interested. She sat on the bed too because their visitors had taken up a position there. "I did not know they had characters already. And the other one? Does she have the same character?"

He was delighted with her interest. "There is always one who is less distressed, but to be honest I am not certain that she is always the same child. They look rather similar."

She smiled at him. "You were right about not being able to love two women, were you not?"

"Very right. It is one or three. Is that not so?" He made some odd noises at the baby.

"That is it!" Frederick exclaimed. "I must call you James, because I cannot address anybody who speaks such sentimental nonsense as Admiral."

"I never asked you to call me Admiral, Frederick, and that you insisted has long been a source of amusement to me. Did you give up control of the gig to Anne?"

"Yes." Frederick narrowed his eyes. "Your daughter is spitting on Anne's bed. In fact, you are holding her so she will spit on Anne's bed and not on you."

"Oh, by the way," said Anne as she watched the admiral employ his handkerchief. He was the master of the house and she did not know how much attention he paid to the furniture and decorations. "Mrs Wentworth spit into that ugly umbrella stand that nobody uses. If you notice it is gone, it is probably still being cleaned."

"Why did she do that? Did she think it so ugly that it made her ill?" the admiral wondered.

"She is expecting."

"And therefore she spits into umbrella stands?" He thought that was extremely strange. "Sophy never spit into anything at all."

"Sophia will do everything more perfectly than everyone else, will she not?" Frederick asked mockingly.

"Naturally. And what were you doing here? You were looking into her dresser, I observed. Are you moving in already?"

"You would not even let me."

"You are talking very oddly, Frederick, by implying I am the one who decides such matters and not Anne. If I said to go ahead and Anne was against, would you still go? No, you would not. Conversely, would you be stopped by my saying no when Anne says yes? No, you would not." He yawned. "Before I fall asleep on your bed, Anne, and Sophia will chide me, would you mind watching the little one while I am off to bed? When she falls asleep you can leave her in the nursery. She only wants company till she falls asleep."

"Of course."

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