This story is part of a longer one which asks the question "What if Lady Catherine had not interfered?" If Lady Catherine had never informed Darcy of Elizabeth's reaction to her demands, then Darcy might never have learned that Elizabeth loved him, and we might have had a different ending. That ending is in the process of being written.

Part I of this story has already been presented as"Darcy Confesses", which stands on its own as a missing scene from Pride and Prejudice, without reference to the greater premise of this new story. The first section of Part II, entitled "Between Love and Loss", was also presented earlier, but has received some new editing since it first appeared. Part II deals with the events following Darcy's second departure from Hertfordshire, in the autumn of 1813 (according to the Chapman chronology), and carries the story through the wedding of Jane and Bingley. This part of the story does turn on the premise that Darcy and Elizabeth never come to realize that they are in love with one another.

Part II

few days after Darcy leaves Netherfield for London, Bingley and Jane become engaged. Everyone at Longbourn is delighted. Jane walks on air, and Elizabeth is glad to see her sister's previous disappointment so happily overcome.

With the engagement of her sister, Elizabeth naturally thinks of Darcy. She knows that Bingley would never have asked Jane to marry him without Darcy's permission. All of the pride and arrogance she had once accused Darcy of now seems to be gone. In fact all of the things she once accused him of are gone. His interference in his friend's and her sister's lives has been corrected, she has learned the truth about Wickham, and at Pemberley she saw a man properly humbled, perfectly attentive and civil--completely different than what she had known him to be before. She also knows, what no one else in her family knows, how very generous he is, and how much her family's present happiness is due to his efforts.

She is now ashamed of the terrible things she said to him that evening at Hunsford, and how badly she had misjudged him. Where she had thought he was proud, she now knows him to be humble and unassuming. Where she had thought he was temperamental, she now knows him to be sensible and even tempered. Where she had thought he was unjust, she now knows him to be honorable and kind. Where she had thought he was conceited, she now knows him to be generous and giving. With every thought of him, her love grows.

All of her change of heart is unknown to her sister. Because Lizzy has been reluctant to discuss fully with Jane the contents of Darcy's letter, or all that had happened in Derbyshire, and, more importantly, her reaction to these events, Jane knows little of what has occurred to change her sister's opinion of Darcy. She only knows, what she always suspected, that the rumors of Darcy's ill treatment of Wickham were false, that Lizzy regrets having accused Darcy of unjustly harming Wickham, and that Lizzy and Darcy saw each other again in Derbyshire--but beyond this, Jane is ignorant of what has occurred and ignorant of Lizzy's true feelings.

Bingley, on the other hand, knows enough of Darcy's feelings to be concerned for his friend. With his own happiness forever secured, he of course wants all those connected to him to be as happy. He therefore decides to ask Jane about Lizzy's current feelings for Darcy, hoping to hear that Lizzy has had a change of heart of which Darcy is unaware.

While walking together near Longbourn Bingley asks Jane, "My dear, has Lizzy told you anything about what passed between her and Darcy last spring?"

"She has told me a little of what had occurred."

"Did she happen to mention to you that Darcy proposed to her?"

"Yes, she did. She told me that Mr. Darcy asked her to marry him, and that she had refused him. I do hope that he was not too terribly affected by her refusal?" says Jane, as concerned as ever for the feeling of others.

"I think, my love, that he was very deeply affected by it. He is still in love with her, Jane. Before he left for Town, he told me that he believes she will never agree to marry him. Is he right? My dear, is there any chance that Lizzy might change her mind and accept him? They seem to me to be a perfect match, and I would dearly love to see them as happy as we are."

"I would like to see it very much as well, but I am sorry to say that I do not think that her opinion is so altered that she could accept him now. She does not really talk about him. If her opinion had changed, I am sure that she would have told me. I believe they saw each other again in Derbyshire this summer?" Jane says, not knowing the extent of their meeting or how pivotal the trip to Derbyshire had been to her sister's feelings.

"Yes, several times. I believe they met directly upon his arrival at Pemberley and spent some time together. He introduced his sister to her the following day, bringing Georgiana to see her only a short time after we had joined him in Derbyshire. He saw her again the next day, and again the next, and Lizzy and Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner were invited to dine with us on the day they were all called back to Longbourn. At that time I had no idea Darcy was in love with Lizzy, but in retrospect it all seems so obvious that I wonder that how I could have avoided seeing it. Looking back on it, I can see that he was very attentive to her and made not the slightest attempt to hide his feelings."

"I had no idea that they had seen each other so frequently," Jane said. "She only told me that they had met, nothing more. I am sorry that I can not tell you that her opinion of him has materially changed. I can say that she thinks much better of him than she once did, and that she is sorry for some of the things she said to him, but I do not think her opinion has changed to such a degree that she could accept him. I hope, for his sake, that he can forget her."

"I hope so too, my dear. I hope so very much indeed," he says as they approach the house.

A few days later, Bingley and Elizabeth are talking together after supper in the drawing room of Longbourn. She is working at the table with Kitty, while Mary is practicing her pianoforte. Jane is upstairs attending to her mother, who can not bear to be out of the spotlight for long, and has therefore come down with a bad case of nerves.

"I hope your friend, Mr. Darcy, was happy to hear of your engagement?" Elizabeth asks her future brother-in-law.

"Oh yes. I, of course, informed him of it soon after it had occurred, and he wrote the most wonderful letter of congratulation," Bingley replies.

"He should be returning here soon, I believe. Then perhaps, he can give you his congratulations in person."

"He had planned to return in a few days, but in his last letter he informed me that he would be remaining in London. I suppose I will next see him when I travel to Town to prepare for the wedding."

"He does not intend to return then?" Elizabeth asks, trying desperately to hide her distress.

"No. But he is to be my groomsman, so he will come down again for the ceremony," he replies, as Jane reënters the room, putting an end to the conversation.

Elizabeth sits, intent on her needlework--stunned by what she has just learned. She has been waiting for Darcy's return, assuming that he was only waiting for his friend's engagement before renewing his own addresses--but if he is not to return, then all of the hopes that she has been entertaining will be ruined.

Can this be true? Is he not going to return to me? she thinks. Have I lost him, just when I have come to love him so dearly? With what Bingley has just told her, her mind is in complete confusion. Unable to sit any longer, she gets up and goes to her room. There, she tries to regain her composure, but fails utterly.

After crying for half-an-hour, she gets control of herself and tries to think clearly. The only explanation for his staying away seems to be that he no longer cares for me. But if his love had survived the terrible things I said to him at Hunsford--and his behavior towards me and my Aunt and Uncle at Pemberley seemed to suggest that he still loved me--what could have caused that love to end now?

Perhaps he can not bear the thought of becoming a brother-in-law to Wickham, she thinks. Perhaps his judgment has at last prevailed and he has decided not to attach himself to the Bennet family. When he was last at Longbourn, he again seemed to me to be as he was the year before--quiet and aloof. Faced again with my family, particularly with my mother, who had been as rude to him as ever, did he decide to forget me once and for all?

Or perhaps I have been mistaken by his behavior at Pemberley. Perhaps he was only more at ease at his home than he had been before, and I had simply misinterpreted his feelings. Perhaps he has never forgiven me for what I said to him. Perhaps he stopped loving me last spring and I have been deluding myself since the summer. In total distress and near despair, she eventually cries herself to sleep.

With her family's attention on Jane, no one notices the change in Elizabeth. She keeps to herself more than usual. Even with the winter growing in strength, her walks lengthen. When the time comes for Jane to travel to London to prepare for the wedding, Lizzy tries to excuse herself from the trip.

"Oh, Lizzy," says Jane. "I have never been so excited about traveling to Town. Bingley is to introduce me to some of his friends, who are in residence there at the moment, and I must say I am quite anxious about it, and it relieves my mind to know that you are to be there. I do not know what I would do without you. I especially will need your advise on the wedding clothes. I want to look my best for Bingley at the ceremony, but I would not want to be overly dressed. I fear my mother would wish me to wear a gown which is overly fine or made of satin or something which will not do at all. I know if you are there, you will help me to find the perfect gown. I quite rely on you, Lizzy."

Elizabeth listens to her sister with increasing discomfort. She had been trying to find a way to stay behind at Longbourn, but hearing her sister speak so warmly of her need for her in London was making the trip almost impossible to avoid. Her spirits, she feared, would not be up to the task of watching her sister and Bingley together in Town--or, more importantly, for the inevitable encounter with Darcy. Fairly convinced as she had become that Darcy no longer cared for her, she felt that she could not meet with him in a state of composure, and wished to avoid the chance of meeting him.

"My dear Jane," Lizzy begins, "I had been thinking of staying behind in Hertfordshire and not going to London with you."

"Not going to London!" cried Jane. "But you must. You simply must. O Lizzy, I am going to need you most desperately. Indeed, I know the Gardiners are expecting you, and that my Aunt is eager to have you with them again. Only think of the fun it will be. We will have a great deal of shopping to do during the morning, then in the evening we will have dinner parties with Bingley's friends, and perhaps be able to go to a ball or two, and have such a gay time. My dear Lizzy, you must not think of staying behind."

While Lizzy did not wish to disappoint either her sister or the Gardiners, of whom she was very fond, Jane of course had no way of knowing that many of the reasons she had given were precisely the reasons Lizzy did not wish to be in Town.

"But Jane, someone should be here at Longbourn to look after things, and since my mother would never miss this opportunity to be in London, I believe I should be the one to stay behind."

Jane looks at her sister in disbelief. "Forgive me, dear Lizzy, but this is utter nonsense! Longbourn will get on very well without us for a little while, and Mary, Kitty and my father will be here. I see no cause for you to exempt yourself from this trip. You simply must come. Please, Lizzy; I will need you beside me. Please say that you will come."

Though she is not at all swayed by her sister's arguments, and still wishes to remain at home, she can not think up an excuse which will satisfy Jane and Elizabeth very reluctantly agrees.

One of her fears is relieved soon after arriving in London by Bingley stating that Mr. Darcy has been unexpectedly called out of town, and would be gone during the whole of their visit there. Darcy is just as anxious to avoid Elizabeth, as she is to avoid him. While both pine away for the other, both are convinced of the other's indifference.

Elizabeth's time in London is not enjoyable to her, but with all of the activities surrounding the wedding preparations, the time passes quickly, and she is soon back at Longbourn.

The day of the wedding is a day of great joy among the family at Longbourn and all of their friends. The wedding is simple and tasteful; attended only by family and a few close friends. Jane looking radiant, and to the fortunate man at the altar looking more like an angel than any woman he has ever seen in life or in art, is filled with sublime happiness. Jane has never felt so perfectly happy nor known that such happiness was even possible. Elizabeth shares in the joy that her sister's spirits spread to all those around her.

Darcy is solemn and apparently emotionless as he stands beside his friend. He desperately tries to avoid looking at Elizabeth. He indulges himself only once, as she precedes her sister up the aisle, but to see her in such circumstances, at the wedding of their two dear friends, to see her eyes bright and her cheeks aglow, is almost too much for him. He feels again, more acutely than ever, that pain in his chest that he has lived with almost since first meeting her. Before he succumbs to his grief, he turns away.

During the ceremony, Elizabeth's attention is only once turned towards the tall man standing beside the groom. She has told herself that at the breakfast following the wedding there would be time enough to ascertain once and for all whether he does still love her or not, and if by chance she has been mistaken in thinking his feelings for her are no longer what they once were, a chance and mistake she has prayed for since learning that he would not be returning to Hertfordshire, there would be, she was certain, an opportunity to make her feelings known to him, but at this moment her mind and her heart are filled only with thoughts of her sister.

The ceremony passes quietly and quickly, and the guests return to Longbourn for a celebratory breakfast. There they are joined by many from the neighborhood, who have come for the celebration, to wish the couple joy, and to observe all of those details which will provide the subject of every conversation for many weeks to come.

Elizabeth stands beside the new Mrs. Bingley as the latter welcomes the guests, but Lizzy's eyes search through the room for Mr. Darcy. He is no where to be seen. After all of the guests have arrived, Elizabeth walks through the rooms looking for him, but he is not there. Eventually, with her mind and heart full of dread, she decides to asks her new brother about Darcy.

"Mr. Bingley," she begins.

"Charles, please call me Charles, sister," he replies with a smile from ear to ear.

"Charles, I do not see Mr. Darcy anywhere. Do you know where he might be?"

"Yes, he left just after the ceremony. He paid his respects to my wife and then departed for Netherfield and thence to Derbyshire. Was there something, particular, you wanted him for?" Bingley asks, hopeful that she would say yes.

"No," she says as lightly as she can muster. "Not at all. I was just wondering where he might be."

She then quickly disappears to her room upstairs. It is over, she thinks, trying very hard to hold back her tears. He is gone forever.... He is gone.... He is gone....I must not cry--not now. I must return downstairs. I must. She barely manages to control herself. She sits for some time trying to compose herself, eventually she believes that she can return downstairs without arousing suspicion, but before going down, she looks one more time in the mirror. Today is the happiest day of my sister's life, she thinks, and the most unhappy of mine!

After the breakfast the newlyweds drive off in Bingley's new carriage for Netherfield. Lizzy is to join them there in a few days, but for now, she is alone. When night comes, she cries herself to sleep and has no Jane to comfort her.

The days and months pass by, but Elizabeth's feelings do not pass. During her solitary walks, her mind is always on Darcy, her love for him, the things she said to him at Hunsford, and the great loss she has suffered. She is now in many ways alone. Her sister, though nearby, is out of reach to her. Even when she is staying at Netherfield, she knows that this is one subject she can not discuss with Jane. Her other sisters, her mother and her father are no help to her. She has no close friends in whom she can confide. She is disappointed and melancholy, but does her best to hide her feelings from the world, letting them out only at night in the loneliness of her room.

For Darcy the months are just as difficult. He remains at Pemberley. He avoids society as much as possible. He accepts few invitations, and invites no one to visit him. His friends worry; his sister worries. Fitzwilliam, who, though he does not have any direct knowledge of what has happened, has a pretty good notion of what is troubling his cousin, tries to snap Darcy out of it. All efforts are in vain. Darcy can not forget her, nor can he stop thinking about her. He, like Elizabeth, is alone and melancholy.