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Chapter 49
"What do you mean you killed her?" He asked, after they had drifted into silence. Elisa curled herself into a ball, trembling as if she were freezing. Darcy saw how troubled she looked and decided that he couldn't continue pushing her for information if it put that hurt expression on her face. "You know what, Elisa? You don't have to answer any of my questions. I'm sorry I'm making you remember things you don't want to."
"No." She grasped his arm. "I haven't told anyone for so long."
Darcy pulled his seat closer to the edge of her bed and sat back. They fell back into silence where only the sound of their breathing indicated any activity at all. It could have minutes, or maybe hours, before she spoke again.
"It was January of '97. I was a senior in high school; Kitty was a sophomore in college. She had come back for the holidays and she was so happy because she had saved up and bought a new car. It was her last night home before she had to go back and I wanted to go out for one more joy ride before she left. Without out our parents in the back seat making comments on the performance of the car or Lydia complaining that she didn't get to sit in the front. I begged and begged her to drive me once around the block, just for fun..." Elisa tightened her grip. Her face was pinched, a pale white in the moonlight. As her breathing grew increasingly labored, Darcy searched his mind for a way to calm her down.
"Shh..." He petted her hair, like he used to do to Georgiana when she was younger and sick in bed. "It's okay."
"We didn't even see the other car coming. One minute we were driving down our street, happy and full of life. The next minute - " Her voice broke into a quite sob. Darcy moved onto her bed, sitting up with his back against the headboard and his legs stretched out. He pulled her towards him, resting her head on his lap while he smoothed her hair in long soothing strokes. "They said a drunk driver swerved over the median and hit us from the left. Kitty didn't have a chance... When I came to, I turned to her and she was sitting there, awake, crushed and crying and with this calm smile on her face like she knew... like she knew."
He couldn't imagine witnessing the death of a loved one. His father and mother had died, yes, but their death had always seemed a lifetime away, in some other country, in some other time and place. Elisa had seen it, and the terror consumed her.
"If I hadn't asked her take me out one more time, we wouldn't have been hit and she wouldn't have been killed... After her death, I went to pieces, as you can imagine... I never told you about George, did I?" She choked on the name, glancing up to his face to see if he felt the same distaste she did. Her eyes were hazy, filled with tears and alcoholic visions of a face she had half-forgotten. Darcy smiled his calm and stern smile that always got to her.
"No, you didn't." He replied. She wondered if he was just being polite, or was he really curious.
"We dated all through high school. I loved him, you know. Loved him, unconditionally. We were perfect for each other and everyone knew that. We talked about marriage after college." Her voice grew venomous. "After Kitty died, I changed. He changed... George couldn't handle it anymore. He broke up with me... left me when I needed him the most."
She let out a bitter laugh. "And now he's marrying my little sister. Apparently they lusted after each other all those years we dated. Apparently - " The word was harsh coming from her mouth. "They slept together while I was grieving for Kitty and apparently that was the real reason George broke up with me."
Darcy attempted to sort the information in his head.
"Betrayal." Elisa whispered, claiming his attention once more. "He betrayed me in the worst way. And now he's getting married and mom welcomes him with open arms and Lydia plays the blushing bride and father's stoic as ever and no one ever asks 'Where's your over-emotional and unbalanced freak of a daughter? You know, the middle one?' because they heard that I'm living in New York and hiding from all the pain of the past, that seems to find me regardless of where I am." She took a breath. "No one ever asks because they don't want to know."
"I asked, and now I know. I don't think you're a freak, Elisa." He put in softly.
"Don't you?" Elisa studied him as carefully as someone who was seeing double could. She sat up suddenly, pulling away from him. "Now you know everything about me. Isn't that what you wanted? To find out my every dirty secret and use it against me? Mock me? Laugh at me?" She stumbled out of bed. "'Poor Ms. Elisa Bennet. Drunk and insane. I'm soooo glad I didn't get involved with her. I'm so glad I got to trample her bleeding little heart without a second thought!'"
She looked wild and vicious, and Darcy couldn't help but feel sorry for her, for all the trial and tribulations that had proved disastrous to her heart. "Calm yourself. You don't know what you're saying." He got up and held her tightly in his arms while she struggled, weakly.
"Let me go, you... you cur!" She twisted and turned, but her coordination was off and her protestations had no strength behind them.
He shook his head. Elisa did not make a pretty drunk, he decided. Pulling her towards the bed again, Darcy settled her in once more. She mumbled incoherently.
"What is it?" He asked carefully.
"I think I'm going to barf." She smiled sickly, and then turned over.
"Is she okay?" was the quiet murmur Darcy heard first thing in the morning. His neck, shoulders, and back were stiff from leaning over the bed as he slept in the nearby chair. He squinted in the light and realized it was morning. Shawn was hovering over him like a bee.
"She's fine, for now." Darcy got up and stretched. "Did you just come in?"
"Oh, no. I came in earlier, but you guys were sleeping and I didn't want to disturb you. Georgiana let me crash on the sofa in your suite." He looked over at Elisa. "I've never seen her like this."
"Me neither."
She looked almost peaceful in the sunlight. Her hair fanned out in a gleaming mahogany wave. The sheets were rumpled and her dress was pulled in a million different directions from her tossing and turning the night before. Only the tearstains down her cheeks were evidence that she had not been simply sleeping.
His heart felt a little tug. What she had must have been through these past years, dealing with everything by herself, never letting anyone know how much her harbored past still pained her. He was determined to do something about it now, to be the one she turned to for help, to be there for her as no had before. Darcy smiled grimly.
"We should let her sleep." He said to Shawn. "She's had a rough night."
"I can imagine." Shawn looked at Elisa thoughtfully. "You wouldn't think such a small person could drink that much, would you?"
Darcy smiled, reluctantly. "She certainly has a will of her own."
He silently hoped that her stubbornness wouldn't become a problem.
Elisa woke up much later that morning, alone in her hotel room. She had the distinct feeling that something had happened the night previous, but she couldn't remember a thing for the life her. Not when her head pounded like someone was taking a jackhammer to her skull. She groaned and rolled to the side of the bed, feeling the worst she had for the longest time.
Softly, the door opened and someone entered the room. Elisa stared at the pair of feet padding over to her, but the light hurt her eyes and she shut them, grimacing.
"You're awake." A hushed male voice said.
She scrunched her face in consideration. Was that who she though it was? She slowly opened on eye and was greeted with the sight of the last person she expected to see. "Mr. Darcy? Oh God. How did you get in here?... Why are you in here?"
"The manager gave me the key." He came closer, bearing a cardboard cup and a white paper bag. She sniffed; it wasn't coffee, but the thought of putting anything in her stomach at that precise moment made her nauseous. "Tea and scones, when you're up to it." He laid the items on the table a little ways away from the bed.
"That still doesn't explain why you're here." She said, closing her eye and not feeling at all up to doing anything at all, even if Mr. Darcy was being nice to her.
"You don't remember what happened last night?" He asked after a while.
Her eyes popped open at once. "Wh-what happened? Did I do things I shouldn't have?... Say things - " Snippets of their conversation flashed through her mind. "Oh dear." She couldn't bear to be in his presence any longer. What an idiotic fool she must have sounded like - whining and blubbering and crying for all she was worth. She couldn't have felt more embarrassed in her life.
"I know now." He said, in the quiet calm voice of his. "You don't have to hide from me any longer."
She wanted to get up and run out of the room. If only the room would stop spinning, and her legs would cooperate. Damn him. "I'm not hiding." She said stiffly, pulling herself into a sitting position with sheer mental will.
"Elisa." He reached out a hand to touch her shoulder.
"Don't." She said shortly. "Don't touch me."
He dropped his hand, his arm swinging to his side.
"I can't believe you did that to me."
She didn't have to say it, but Darcy knew what she was talking about. He had taken advantage of her drunken state, weaning from her information that he - no matter how much he thought otherwise - didn't have a right to.
"Get out." She said, quietly.
Darcy's face was set, but she couldn't see his determined expression. He left after a moment.
He realized he loved her. That should count for something.
Chapter 50
It wasn't long before the L.A. Fashion Week came to a final, disastrous conclusion. At least, that was how Darcy felt the week had ended. He thought he had finally taken a few steps in the right direction with Elisa, only to be shoved back, losing the advantage of those steps and then some. Shit. He stared out the window of the airplane, pretending to admire the view. What am I going to do know? Where do we go from here?
Elisa hadn't spoken to him the last two days of the trip. She seemed to be battling a bit of depression. Georgiana was concerned for her friend, and she kept shooting dirty looks at her brother. Darcy would shrug, and then look away, troubled with his own thoughts. He didn't need Georgiana giving him the third degree, too.
What had happened that night was strictly confidential. He couldn't tell a soul, no matter how much his sister demanded information, until Elisa had given him the liberty to do so. But that wasn't very likely now that she hated his guts.
Rightly so. He thought, feeling like a cad. No wait! Not rightly so... I was trying to help her. He snuck a peek over his shoulder at Elisa, who was sitting a row back on the opposite aisle. She was talking softly with Shawn, looking somewhat distracted and sad. He wished she would speak to him, even look at him and acknowledge his existence. But she hadn't, and very likely wouldn't until the initial anger had worn off.
If he could just get a chance to talk with her, he'd... Well, he'd do something. He wasn't sure yet what, though.
Smooth move, Bennet. Elisa thought harshly as she, for the fifth time that day, almost crashed into another person in the hallway. She smiled sheepishly at the other person and walked away quickly. This was really becoming embarrassing. Escaping into her and Georgiana's studio office, she sank down into a chair and let out a huge breath of air. I need to get out of here.
Barely a week back from Los Angeles, and Elisa felt almost as misplaced in the splendors of Pemberley, Inc. as she had when she arrived there last autumn. When would she ever feel comfortable in her surroundings? When would she ever feel comfortable in her own skin?
Probably never.
She looked around the office, hoping to find something to distract her from thinking about certain things that she didn't want to think about. Mainly, that night in the hotel room in Los Angeles with Mr. Darcy. William. Elisa smiled ruefully. She had never been much of a drinker, but that night it had all gotten out of hand so quickly. The pleasant feeling of numbness had swirled through her blood stream, spreading throughout her body with each sip. One minute the bitter taste stung her insides, the next minute she didn't care anymore.
It had seemed so easy to forget everything. For just one moment, not to hurt so much.
She couldn't believe she had just told him everything. She felt so foolish, so stupid.
Stupid mistake.
And to think, she was sort of getting to like him. Sort of. Elisa walked over to her desk and began shuffling stacks of paper into some semblance of order. She couldn't bear to even imagine what he thought of her now. Before she was just some odd, out of place employee of his sister - new, maybe a tad different than the rest of the women he knew, but generally not unlike an interesting exotic species at the zoo. Now she was... what?
"Elisa?" She turned to the doorway where Richard was standing, looking at her curiously.
"Oh, hey." She gave him a small smile, trying to push back her distressing thoughts.
"You haven't been to see me since you're come back." He studied her carefully. "Is something wrong?"
"No." She sat up abruptly. "Why would you think that?"
Richard shrugged and sauntered in. "Belle's hosting an impromptu dinner party tonight. Why don't you come?"
"Me?" She looked surprised.
Poor girl. Richard observed, thoughtfully. To be so loved by the people around you and not even know it. To be genuinely shocked at a dinner invite from a friend. He shook his head, frowning a little. He wished he could show her how much everyone cared for her.
"Yes, of course you. Come on, it'll be fun."
"Well, I don't know - "
He flashed a persuasive smile. "Plus, you haven't met Belle yet. I've talked about you so much to her that now she's dying to meet you. Do me a favor and come, okay?"
Elisa huffed. "Fine... Thanks for cornering me into a box, Richard."
He grinned. "You're very welcome. 8 PM at my place on Park Ave. You need directions?"
"I'll get them from Ana." Elisa rose and pushed Richard out of the room. "Now go, before you have me promising to do all sorts of things that I don't want to."
She was smiling. He was glad he was able to make her do that. He waited a moment, watching her, and then walked down the hallway and rounded the corner, bumping into Georgiana.
"Well?" She asked impatiently. "Did she tell you?"
Richard let out a breath. "No. And I didn't ask." He stopped her with a glance before she could interrupt him. "And I won't. Ana, you have to let them work it out for themselves."
"You know, you were so much more fun before." She pouted.
He grinned. "Well, I got her to come tonight. That should make you happy."
"I'd be happy if I knew what was up with Elisa and William." Georgiana gave him a pointed look and huffed when he shook his head 'no'. "Fine, whatever."
"That's the spirit." Richard smiled and walked to the elevators. Now all he had to do was get Darcy to cooperate and then let things happen by themselves.
Darcy roamed around Richard's apartment, admiring the changes rendered it by the ever-charming Cybelle. He hadn't been there for a while, so when he first stepped into the room, it was a huge shock to his already weakened system.
He fingered a delicate looking porcelain dancer figurine and smiled up at Richard. "Yours?"
"Belle's." Richard put in succinctly. "Don't give me any grief about it."
"I can't believe she made you give up the leather." Darcy said, pained. "It's simply unnatural." He gestured to the tame white-cushioned furniture.
"Love can make you do funny things." Richard responded smoothly. Something glazed over his cousin's eyes, lasting only for a second before it disappeared. Darcy coughed discreetly and turned away. Richard grinned to himself, enjoying that he had caught his cousin off guard.
"Yes, I suppose." Darcy shrugged and walked toward the kitchen.
Richard looked after him with a frown. He wished Darcy would open up and tell him what troubled him. But Darcy wasn't the type to do that. He sighed, and turned to the front door just as the doorbell rang.
"You're here." Richard smiled as he pulled in Georgiana into a hug. "Is she coming?"
"She asked for directions, if that's what you mean." She sniffed the air. "Mmm. Is Belle cooking?"
"You know it." Richard grinned and pushed her towards the kitchen. "Keep your brother busy until she gets here."
"I thought you were done playing matchmaker?" She narrowed her eyes.
"Don't get cheeky with me." He chuckled, giving her another nudge. "Just distract him. I don't want any chance of him causing a scene and scaring her off."
"Well, good luck." Georgiana said wryly, walking towards the source of the clanging of pots and pans.
Elisa took a deep breath, lifting her head as her eyes ran up the fifteen floors of Richard's Park Ave. apartment. Man, these guys know how to live in style. She took another fortifying breath and walked straight into the building, giving the doorman a weak smile.
"Your name, Miss?" The man behind the counter asked.
"Elisabeth Bennet. I'm looking for Richard Fitzwilliam's apartment?"
He nodded towards the elevator bank. "The elevator car has been programmed to his floor. If you'll just step in, it will take to straight to his apartment."
She did as he suggested and was in a matter of seconds transported to the tenth floor. The door opened up into a creamy expanse of hallway decorated with a faint blush rose motif and gold lighting fixtures. Pausing in front of 10-H, she wondered what she was being so uptight about.
Because I know he'll be in there. I know he'll be in there, and I'm still here. What does that mean? Gah.
The door opened suddenly. Richard was standing there, a great smile on his face.
"Whoa. That was weird." She said lamely.
"I guess I have ESP, or something." He grinned. "Come on in. The food's almost done."
She shrugged out of her coat, sniffing the warm smells that permeated the room. "It smells delicious. What is it?"
"Why don't you ask the chef?" He led her towards the kitchen, where the boisterous conversation and wonderful aromas were emanating from. "I'll introduce you to Belle."
"Great." She could already hear a woman laughing that she had never heard before. "Who else is here?"
Richard didn't answer her question. Instead, he pushed her into the kitchen, his body barring the entrance in case she wanted to escape. Her eyes scanned the room. There were several people she didn't know, some she knew only from sight at work, Georgiana, a beautiful woman by the sink chopping shallots that could only be Belle, and, as she had suspected, William Darcy.
From the surprised look on his face, he hadn't been expected her. Good. It was nice to knock him off his feet once in a while. Lord knows he did that enough to her.
The room shushed at her entrance.
Richard coughed discreetly. "Everyone, this is my dear friend Elisabeth Bennet. Come. I'll introduce you." He latched onto her arm as if he expected her to run. She wasn't planning on any such thing, though. He tugged her over to the beautiful brunette by the sink. She was tall, with the athletic build and grace of a dancer, wiry but strong. Her carriage was graceful, even when she was slicing vegetables, her face with marked, unique features that suited her quite well. Her cheeks were pink and glowing when Richard introduced Elisa to her.
"It's nice to finally meet you." Her voice was sultry, musical and exotic. "Richard's told me so much about you."
"Likewise." Elisa said, smiling.
"Oh. I'd shake your hand, but mind's all dirty from cooking." Belle consciously rubbed her wet hands on the apron she had tied on.
Elisa giggled. "That's quite all right. Thank you so much for inviting me to your dinner party."
"No thanks are needed between friends, I hope. That is if we are to become friends?" Belle raised her perfectly shaped brows.
"Of course." Elisa seemed taken aback by her open show of friendship, but she covered it up quickly.
The conversation in the room resumed.
Richard smiled. Taking her arm, he led Elisa around the room and introduced her to the people she did not know. Finally coming upon Darcy, he released her and walked towards the stove to commandeer the pan searing, mockingly scoffing at one of the younger men who had tried to help.
"I - I didn't know you were coming." Darcy said finally.
She gave him a somewhat tight smile. "Funny. I knew you were."
Chapter 50
It wasn't long before the L.A. Fashion Week came to a final, disastrous conclusion. At least, that was how Darcy felt the week had ended. He thought he had finally taken a few steps in the right direction with Elisa, only to be shoved back, losing the advantage of those steps and then some. Shit. He stared out the window of the airplane, pretending to admire the view. What am I going to do know? Where do we go from here?
Elisa hadn't spoken to him the last two days of the trip. She seemed to be battling a bit of depression. Georgiana was concerned for her friend, and she kept shooting dirty looks at her brother. Darcy would shrug, and then look away, troubled with his own thoughts. He didn't need Georgiana giving him the third degree, too.
What had happened that night was strictly confidential. He couldn't tell a soul, no matter how much his sister demanded information, until Elisa had given him the liberty to do so. But that wasn't very likely now that she hated his guts.
Rightly so. He thought, feeling like a cad. No wait! Not rightly so... I was trying to help her. He snuck a peek over his shoulder at Elisa, who was sitting a row back on the opposite aisle. She was talking softly with Shawn, looking somewhat distracted and sad. He wished she would speak to him, even look at him and acknowledge his existence. But she hadn't, and very likely wouldn't until the initial anger had worn off.
If he could just get a chance to talk with her, he'd... Well, he'd do something. He wasn't sure yet what, though.
Smooth move, Bennet. Elisa thought harshly as she, for the fifth time that day, almost crashed into another person in the hallway. She smiled sheepishly at the other person and walked away quickly. This was really becoming embarrassing. Escaping into her and Georgiana's studio office, she sank down into a chair and let out a huge breath of air. I need to get out of here.
Barely a week back from Los Angeles, and Elisa felt almost as misplaced in the splendors of Pemberley, Inc. as she had when she arrived there last autumn. When would she ever feel comfortable in her surroundings? When would she ever feel comfortable in her own skin?
Probably never.
She looked around the office, hoping to find something to distract her from thinking about certain things that she didn't want to think about. Mainly, that night in the hotel room in Los Angeles with Mr. Darcy. William. Elisa smiled ruefully. She had never been much of a drinker, but that night it had all gotten out of hand so quickly. The pleasant feeling of numbness had swirled through her blood stream, spreading throughout her body with each sip. One minute the bitter taste stung her insides, the next minute she didn't care anymore.
It had seemed so easy to forget everything. For just one moment, not to hurt so much.
She couldn't believe she had just told him everything. She felt so foolish, so stupid.
Stupid mistake.
And to think, she was sort of getting to like him. Sort of. Elisa walked over to her desk and began shuffling stacks of paper into some semblance of order. She couldn't bear to even imagine what he thought of her now. Before she was just some odd, out of place employee of his sister - new, maybe a tad different than the rest of the women he knew, but generally not unlike an interesting exotic species at the zoo. Now she was... what?
"Elisa?" She turned to the doorway where Richard was standing, looking at her curiously.
"Oh, hey." She gave him a small smile, trying to push back her distressing thoughts.
"You haven't been to see me since you're come back." He studied her carefully. "Is something wrong?"
"No." She sat up abruptly. "Why would you think that?"
Richard shrugged and sauntered in. "Belle's hosting an impromptu dinner party tonight. Why don't you come?"
"Me?" She looked surprised.
Poor girl. Richard observed, thoughtfully. To be so loved by the people around you and not even know it. To be genuinely shocked at a dinner invite from a friend. He shook his head, frowning a little. He wished he could show her how much everyone cared for her.
"Yes, of course you. Come on, it'll be fun."
"Well, I don't know - "
He flashed a persuasive smile. "Plus, you haven't met Belle yet. I've talked about you so much to her that now she's dying to meet you. Do me a favor and come, okay?"
Elisa huffed. "Fine... Thanks for cornering me into a box, Richard."
He grinned. "You're very welcome. 8 PM at my place on Park Ave. You need directions?"
"I'll get them from Ana." Elisa rose and pushed Richard out of the room. "Now go, before you have me promising to do all sorts of things that I don't want to."
She was smiling. He was glad he was able to make her do that. He waited a moment, watching her, and then walked down the hallway and rounded the corner, bumping into Georgiana.
"Well?" She asked impatiently. "Did she tell you?"
Richard let out a breath. "No. And I didn't ask." He stopped her with a glance before she could interrupt him. "And I won't. Ana, you have to let them work it out for themselves."
"You know, you were so much more fun before." She pouted.
He grinned. "Well, I got her to come tonight. That should make you happy."
"I'd be happy if I knew what was up with Elisa and William." Georgiana gave him a pointed look and huffed when he shook his head 'no'. "Fine, whatever."
"That's the spirit." Richard smiled and walked to the elevators. Now all he had to do was get Darcy to cooperate and then let things happen by themselves.
Darcy roamed around Richard's apartment, admiring the changes rendered it by the ever-charming Cybelle. He hadn't been there for a while, so when he first stepped into the room, it was a huge shock to his already weakened system.
He fingered a delicate looking porcelain dancer figurine and smiled up at Richard. "Yours?"
"Belle's." Richard put in succinctly. "Don't give me any grief about it."
"I can't believe she made you give up the leather." Darcy said, pained. "It's simply unnatural." He gestured to the tame white-cushioned furniture.
"Love can make you do funny things." Richard responded smoothly. Something glazed over his cousin's eyes, lasting only for a second before it disappeared. Darcy coughed discreetly and turned away. Richard grinned to himself, enjoying that he had caught his cousin off guard.
"Yes, I suppose." Darcy shrugged and walked toward the kitchen.
Richard looked after him with a frown. He wished Darcy would open up and tell him what troubled him. But Darcy wasn't the type to do that. He sighed, and turned to the front door just as the doorbell rang.
"You're here." Richard smiled as he pulled in Georgiana into a hug. "Is she coming?"
"She asked for directions, if that's what you mean." She sniffed the air. "Mmm. Is Belle cooking?"
"You know it." Richard grinned and pushed her towards the kitchen. "Keep your brother busy until she gets here."
"I thought you were done playing matchmaker?" She narrowed her eyes.
"Don't get cheeky with me." He chuckled, giving her another nudge. "Just distract him. I don't want any chance of him causing a scene and scaring her off."
"Well, good luck." Georgiana said wryly, walking towards the source of the clanging of pots and pans.
Elisa took a deep breath, lifting her head as her eyes ran up the fifteen floors of Richard's Park Ave. apartment. Man, these guys know how to live in style. She took another fortifying breath and walked straight into the building, giving the doorman a weak smile.
"Your name, Miss?" The man behind the counter asked.
"Elisabeth Bennet. I'm looking for Richard Fitzwilliam's apartment?"
He nodded towards the elevator bank. "The elevator car has been programmed to his floor. If you'll just step in, it will take to straight to his apartment."
She did as he suggested and was in a matter of seconds transported to the tenth floor. The door opened up into a creamy expanse of hallway decorated with a faint blush rose motif and gold lighting fixtures. Pausing in front of 10-H, she wondered what she was being so uptight about.
Because I know he'll be in there. I know he'll be in there, and I'm still here. What does that mean? Gah.
The door opened suddenly. Richard was standing there, a great smile on his face.
"Whoa. That was weird." She said lamely.
"I guess I have ESP, or something." He grinned. "Come on in. The food's almost done."
She shrugged out of her coat, sniffing the warm smells that permeated the room. "It smells delicious. What is it?"
"Why don't you ask the chef?" He led her towards the kitchen, where the boisterous conversation and wonderful aromas were emanating from. "I'll introduce you to Belle."
"Great." She could already hear a woman laughing that she had never heard before. "Who else is here?"
Richard didn't answer her question. Instead, he pushed her into the kitchen, his body barring the entrance in case she wanted to escape. Her eyes scanned the room. There were several people she didn't know, some she knew only from sight at work, Georgiana, a beautiful woman by the sink chopping shallots that could only be Belle, and, as she had suspected, William Darcy.
From the surprised look on his face, he hadn't been expected her. Good. It was nice to knock him off his feet once in a while. Lord knows he did that enough to her.
The room shushed at her entrance.
Richard coughed discreetly. "Everyone, this is my dear friend Elisabeth Bennet. Come. I'll introduce you." He latched onto her arm as if he expected her to run. She wasn't planning on any such thing, though. He tugged her over to the beautiful brunette by the sink. She was tall, with the athletic build and grace of a dancer, wiry but strong. Her carriage was graceful, even when she was slicing vegetables, her face with marked, unique features that suited her quite well. Her cheeks were pink and glowing when Richard introduced Elisa to her.
"It's nice to finally meet you." Her voice was sultry, musical and exotic. "Richard's told me so much about you."
"Likewise." Elisa said, smiling.
"Oh. I'd shake your hand, but mind's all dirty from cooking." Belle consciously rubbed her wet hands on the apron she had tied on.
Elisa giggled. "That's quite all right. Thank you so much for inviting me to your dinner party."
"No thanks are needed between friends, I hope. That is if we are to become friends?" Belle raised her perfectly shaped brows.
"Of course." Elisa seemed taken aback by her open show of friendship, but she covered it up quickly.
The conversation in the room resumed.
Richard smiled. Taking her arm, he led Elisa around the room and introduced her to the people she did not know. Finally coming upon Darcy, he released her and walked towards the stove to commandeer the pan searing, mockingly scoffing at one of the younger men who had tried to help.
"I - I didn't know you were coming." Darcy said finally.
She gave him a somewhat tight smile. "Funny. I knew you were."
Chapter 51
The crowded kitchen buzzed with excited talk, warm laughter and joking. The smells of sizzling meat and the sharp, pungent bite of garlic and shallots hung heavy in the air. Richard and a few of the other men nipped at the Cabernet Sauvignon that was being added to the sauce. When Belle went to scold them, they expressed such feigned penitence that her indignant reprimands soon dissolved into amused chuckles. The guests mingled, at home in the beautifully furnished apartment.
"We have to talk." Darcy approached Elisa after a few minutes. She had fallen gaily into conversation with another male guest, conveniently forgetting his existence - that annoyed him. When she was finally alone, he sidled up next to her. "Elisa - "
"Later." She turned away from him, plastering a smile as Georgiana sent her a questioning look.
Darcy huffed in irritation.
Everyone soon drifted over into the dining room. The table was set with pale green ceramic dinnerware with a cute apple and blossom design, fluted crystal glasses, and polished silverware. The women made a general coo of approval. The men made the obligatory rolling-eyes-at-feminine-absurdities look about the room, smirking as they caught another man's eyes. The food was served, wine and drinks poured, and everyone settled down to partake in the feast that had be provided.
It was no wonder that Darcy and Elisa ended up sitting next to each other. Each had a feeling Richard had something to do with it.
"I believe we must have some conversation." He said grudgingly, fighting to be heard over the sound of clinking dishes and boisterous chatter. "A very little will suffice."
Her eyes blazed with emotion but her voice was level. "I really don't wish to talk to you right now."
"Now's a good a time as any." His voice rose a degree. "Why don't you just say it, huh?"
"Say what?" She replied a little harshly.
"That you hate that I know the truth." She made a slight squeaking sound as his voice got even louder. "That I got to you - and that scares you."
"Shut up!" Elisa exclaimed, a little louder than she had planned. Everyone stopped talking, looking at her curiously. "Excuse me." She made a hasty retreat, forcing a bland smile on her face.
Darcy got up, made his apologies, and went after her. After an awkward pause, the other guests resumed their conversations - all except for Richard and Georgiana, who shot concerned glances to each other.
He found her on the little balcony that jutted out of the living room. It reminded him of last Christmas, when he had come upon her leaning on the balcony banister of his apartment, staring into the night. Only this time, she was angry, not contemplative.
"How many times do I have to tell you that I don't want to talk to you?" Elisa asked. "Why can't you just leave me alone?"
"You've been alone for too long." He said seriously. "It's time things changed."
"What makes you think you're the one making the changes?" Her eyes flared. "What gives you the right to decide how I should live my life? Maybe I don't want things changed!"
"You can lie to yourself, Elisa. But you can't lie to me."
She was momentarily silenced. He sighed and went over to her, leaning his back on the banister. "Look... I see how much pain you're in... No, wait." He raised his hand to stop her from interrupting. "Maybe I'll never understand what you've been through. But I do know what it's like to lose someone you love. Give me that much."
She sobered, remembering his parents. "I'm sorry."
"It's been a long time..."
"No." She let out a cleansing breath. "I didn't mean that... I mean... I haven't been fair, I guess. To you."
Darcy looked at her curiously.
"I - " She faltered, shaking her head. "It wasn't your fault that I was drunk that night - it was mine. I shouldn't have blamed you for that... and for... well, you know."
He glanced at her profile. There was a soft halo around her head, the light radiating from the lamps inside the living room. "Don't be sorry about that." She turned to him, the beginnings of tears in her eyes. "You needed to tell someone. And I wanted to hear it."
"You must think me a pretty pathetic mess." She managed a weak smile, the anger subsiding.
"Oh, no." He smiled a little back. "Pathetic, yes. But not a mess."
She let out a shaky laugh. He held her eyes for a moment, before she lowered her lids, a faint blush on her cheeks. "I sort of made a fool of myself in there, didn't I?"
"Well, I shouldn't have provoked you." He admitted. "I was just so... angry. Frustrated, mostly. I wanted so badly to talk to you, to set things straight... I wanted things back to where they were before... when we were on good terms."
"Were we ever on good terms?" She joked. "I seem to remember feeling this persistent annoyance whenever you were around."
Darcy smiled. "We got off on a bad start last November. I guess it didn't help that I was a ridiculously rude ass when I first met you."
"And I guess it didn't help that I acted like I had a stick up my butt." Elisa conceded.
"Are we calling another truce?" He asked, remembering the last time they were together on a balcony and had called truce for past misunderstandings and grudges. "Yes?"
She offered her hand. He clasped it his, his warm grip warming her frozen fingers. Holding it longer than necessary, he gave into the urge and pulled her closer to him. Her face was upturned to his, her eyes betraying confusion slowly dawning into understanding. "I know the truth, and I still want you. I don't pity you and I don't feel sorry for you." With his other hand he traced a finger down her pale cheeks, running them over her lips that trembled a little at his touch. "I can't change your past. I can't take away the hurt and pain." She tried to lower her head but he held it more firmly in his grasp. "Look at me."
Oh god, he's going to kiss me. She could barely register the thought before panic fluttered in her stomach. It was like slow motion, as his mouth gently dipped toward hers. At the last possible second, she pulled away. "I'm sorry... I just can't... right now." She apologized, frightened and thrilled at the same time. Oh god, oh god, oh god...
He dropped her hand and stepped back. "When, Elisa?" He didn't sound particularly angry, only maybe a little disappointed.
"I don't know." She answered truthfully. "I need to think."
He gave her a small, regretful smile. "Don't think too hard about this, Elisa." He quickly dropped a quick kiss on her cheek, before he could stop himself. "Just let it happen... I like you - a lot. Don't doubt that."
She watched as he walked back inside the living room. She shivered slightly, but it had nothing to do with the chill night air. Jesus. Her heart raced and she had to remind herself to exhale. She could feel her reservations and misgivings physically melting away from her system.
And that worried her.
"Damned if I let him sweep me off my feet." She huffed, amused and uneasy.
Unknown to her and within listening distance, Darcy pressed his back to the wall by the sliding doors. He smiled in relief, grinning stupidly. At least I'm having some sort of impact on her, he thought wryly.
Chapter 52
The gifts started arriving the next morning, and Elisa had no doubt whom they were coming from. First it was a little stuffed toy in the shape of a smiling turtle (which made her giggle). Next, an "I <3 NY" key chain (which made her roll her eyes). Then, a packet of Top Ramen (which she laughed at... and then ate for dinner).
The small, innocuous and curiously random gifts continued appearing for about a week until the day when Elisa found a See's Bordeaux Bar lying on her table, and she knew she was in deep trouble. Letting out a small squeak of delight, she looked around to see if anyone had somehow misplaced the candy before claiming it for herself. Hoarding it like precious gold, she opened the crinkly plastic, looked around to see if anyone heard, and slowly took a minute nibble of the milk chocolate and brown sugar buttercream filling. It wasn't long before the entire bar was devoured and she was craving more.
"Looking for this?" Darcy was leaning against the doorway, obviously amused. In his outstretched hand he held another Bordeaux Bar.
Her eyes darted to his. "Give it to me." She said before she could stop herself.
He chuckled. "I would love to... but on one condition."
"What?" Elisa demanded impatiently. The chocolate was just screaming to be eaten.
"You agree to go out on a date with me this evening."
She scoffed. "I can surely find someplace in New York that sells See's - "
"Yes, if you send someone to JFK to fetch it for you." Darcy grinned.
"The internet - " She started to say.
"Why pay for shipping and wait a few days when you can have this now." He waved the chocolate bar for emphasis. "A date tonight, right after work. I'll come down and meet you here. A Bordeaux Bar for a few hours of your time, what do you say?"
The absurdity of his offer made her - reluctantly - smile, and give in. "Fine."
"Ah, I knew you would cave." He smiled broadly.
"Yeah, whatever." She glared. "Now give it here."
"You're welcome." Bingley said in a singsong voice when he caught Darcy going into his office.
Darcy avoided his friend's all-knowing look and sat down at his desk. He cleared his throat several times, hoping Bingley would leave if ignored. "Um... for what?" Darcy finally asked, pretending he hadn't a clue what his friend was talking about.
Bingley rolled his eyes. "Give me a break Darce. 'Hypothetically, Charles, if a man wanted to get in the good graces of a woman he liked, what should he do?'... I mean, do I look stupid?"
Darcy colored slightly.
"Well?" Bingley continued, cheerfully. "I take it from your triumphant smile that you've succeeded with Elisa."
"What?" Darcy bit off a little too quickly. Did everyone in the building already know?
Misunderstanding, Bingley raised a brow. "Don't tell me she refused you?"
"Wha - I mean, no, she didn't refuse me... I asked her out on a date, and she said yes." He answered, slightly troubled. Have I been that obvious? If Charles knows... well, shoot. Probably everyone knows.
Bingley smiled widely. "Good! You haven't been out on a real date since Natalia, and that was years ago. Haven't I always told you what you needed was a girlfriend?" He prattled on, oblivious to the fact that Darcy wasn't paying him much attention.
"How many people know?" Darcy interrupted suddenly. When Bingley looked confused, he added, "About me and Elisa. How many?"
"Um... no one else, I think - "
"Is the attraction that noticeable?"
Bingley smiled. "Well, on your part maybe - " When Darcy anxiously tugged at his hair, Bingley laughed. "Darce, you really have gone too long without a proper date."
"Tell me about it." Darcy huffed. "Look at me, I'm already acting crazy."
"Yes, you are. In fact, you're kind of scaring me with the increasing randomness of your questions." The glittering in his eyes betrayed his barely restrained amusement at Darcy's behavior. Oh, how the mighty have fallen! "One word of advice, my friend?"
"Yeah?"
"Whatever you do, do not act like Mr. Darcy, CEO of Pemberley, Inc. Remember, after work hours you're William Darcy, all-around good guy with a surprising sense of humor."
He's teasing me! Charles teasing me! What has the world come to? "Oh, get out of here."
Bingley grinned. "Just reminding you, in case you forget."
"Really, move it or I'll sock you one."
I have to tell Richard. William Darcy and Elisa Bennet - who'd have thought? "And remember - don't act like a stuffy prig!" Bingley nearly shouted with glee as he quickly darted out the room. The other employees outside Darcy's office stood and stared as Bingley departed down the hall. When they turned towards their boss, who had stuck his head outside the doorway to shout back at Bingley, Darcy abruptly looked uncomfortable and hurriedly shut the door with an embarrassed cough.
Good Lord, I have lost my mind! He thought, laughingly, amazed at his sudden burst of childish playfulness.
"I temporarily went insane over a two ounce chocolate bar." Elisa exclaimed pitifully, slumping down into the chair opposite Janine's desk.
Janine opened up a cup of strawberry yogurt and took out a granola bar. She offered some of her celery sticks to Elisa, who shook her head in refusal. "What did you do?"
Elisa heartily bit into the sandwich she had brought along with her in search of Janine on her lunch break. "I somehow managed to get conned into a date."
"Ooh, it wasn't with Eli in Payroll?" Janine looked horrified.
"No, no, nothing as terrible as that." Elisa grimaced.
"Mum always said that if you didn't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all, but - " She shuddered for effect. "He flirted with me, you know. Called me 'Strawberry Shortcake' or some other sort of nonsense. He asked me if I wanted to have tea with him. Like I'd have tea with such a - "
"I thought we were talking about me?" Elisa interrupted.
"Oh, sorry. You were saying something about chocolate?"
"And a date. You'll never guess whom with."
Janine licked her spoon thoughtfully. "William Darcy?"
"How'd you guess?" Elisa looked bewildered. Janine shrugged. "Yes, him. Anyway, you have to help me get out of it."
"Why would I do that?"
"Because you're my friend and I asked you to." Elisa pouted.
Janine scrunched up her face. "But Mr. Darcy is a nice man."
"That's besides the point." Elisa huffed.
"Which is?" Janine crumbled the granola bar into her yogurt. "See? You should go."
"But I don't want to."
"Yes, you do." Janine smiled. "You just have to get used to the idea of dating again."
The sun was setting now. It was peaceful - hazy and sort of dizzying, but peaceful. Outside, the air was gray where the shadows fell across the streets between high-rise buildings. At around 5 pm there was a mass exodus of people in business suits and long coats flooding the once quiet streets. Yellow cabs began appearing out of nowhere; dark luxury cars rose out of the depths of hidden parking structures. Honking and shouting became familiar and soothing background noise as Darcy lounged in his swiveling leather chair and thought.
I am going to screw this up. Big time.
He was approaching the inevitable three-oh (well, in a year or so, but that didn't seem far off) and the only thing he had to his name was his company. Okay, so Pemberley, Inc. was something to be proud of, but still... there was that empty void that the love of his family and friends just could not seem to fill.
What he needed was the love of a good woman. At least, that's what Richard would have told him. Charles, too. They were always, in their own subtle way, nagging him to get a love life. After the surprisingly painless breakup with Natalia a few years back, he hadn't had a steady girlfriend. He had barely dated, and those women that he did take out more than once he later always found them wanting. They didn't have that... something.
Fire? He wanted the passion. He wanted the unconditional love.
And he wanted to love. His heart was heavy with the need. How it would feel to really love, he wanted to know, wanted to experience the strength and beauty of it. Like his mother and father, God rest their souls - how they had loved so deeply.
Was it too much to ask the same for himself? He sighed, slowly closing off the picture in his mind of his late parents. Sometimes it was too much to think of them, and what he had lost.
"Sir?"
He looked up, startled. Hannah, tidily dressed up in her suit and khaki overcoat, smiled warmly. "Are you working late tonight?"
"Oh, no." Elisa was waiting downstairs, he reminded himself. It was time to go. "I'm getting ready to leave myself."
"Goodnight then, sir."
"Goodnight, Hannah." Darcy packed his things into his briefcase and hung his coat over his arm. Shutting off the lights, he closed the door and walked toward the elevator bank. The floor was empty of employees, silent except of the hum of the water cooler at the far end of the room. He gathered his thoughts, mentally preparing himself for the date to come.
Please don't mess this up. You're on tentative ground as it is.
Chapter 53
Obviously the man wasn't coming.
At least, that's what she was silently hoping. Elisa checked her watch for the twentieth time, wondering what was keeping him. Shouldn't there be some ten-minute rule? Like, if he doesn't arrive within ten minutes, I get to leave? She busied herself with picking lint off her cream-colored winter coat, wondering if she was dressed appropriately for whatever he had in mind. Man, who cares what you're wearing? Sheesh. She shook her head as if to clear the preposterous thoughts. Great, now I'm thinking myself to death with stupid thoughts. This is just fabulous. Just look at yourself, Elisabeth Bennet. Why, you'd think you were sixteen and never been out on a date before. Get a hold of yourself.
The far-off ding of the elevator doors opening seemed ridiculously loud in the quiet of the building. She could hear his steady footsteps gradually making their way to her office. Growing immediately still, she held her breath and ceased fidgeting.
Lord, did the man grow handsomer every minute? Okay... so he's hot. Big deal.
"Hey. Sorry to keep you waiting." He said, a soft smile on his lips.
"Yeah, well..." She shrugged. "You bribed me with chocolate, so I guess I can make allowances ... um, you wouldn't happen to have anymore, would you?" Her hands began to fidget again.
He noticed her restless movements. "Are you nervous?" Because I am. He put on his coat, hoping that she wouldn't see how anxious he was.
"Of course not." She said, miffed that he would presume that he could make her edgy (even though he did, but that was besides the point). Tucking her hands into her pockets, she put on what he considered a rather poor attempt at an eager expression. "So, what are we doing tonight?"
"How about dinner and a movie? I'll pick the restaurant and you pick the movie?" He guided her outside the office, closing the door behind him.
See? Nothing to worry about. You can do this. "Sounds good." She mustered as much enthusiasm as she could.
He chuckled as they got into the elevators and descended. "You don't have to look like you're being led to the guillotine."
She colored, lifting her hands to her face to cover her cheeks. "Do I look like that? I'm sorry."
"Come on, then." He took her hand and led her down the street, walking past the New York Stock Exchange in the direction of Trinity Church. "We have to catch the N Train to 23rd if we're going to make our reservations on time. Are you hungry?"
"A little." Her stomach rumbled. "A lot." She amended, as Darcy laughed.
"Good." He led her down the stairs to the subway station. The air cooled immediately, and she shivered. "Cold?" He cupped her small hands in his much larger ones, slowly rubbing them together to produce heat through friction. Her cheeks pinked. "Better?"
Elisa coughed, still blushing. "Yeah." She pulled her hands from his, embarrassed that he could fluster her so easily. It'd been a long time since a good-looking man had paid any sort of attention to her - at least, a man that she increasingly found herself not minding getting attention from. The more she got to know him, be in his company, the more she admired him. He was terribly charming when he wanted to be - which now seemed like all the time.
The train pulled up abruptly, the roar of the engine drowning out any further conversation. Darcy didn't take her hand this time. Okay, old man, she's a little nervous. So are you. Don't read too much into it. Guiding her with a light touch on the small of her back, he led her into the crowded subway car. The general hum of the other passengers made private conversation impossible, so Darcy contented himself with leaning against one of the center poles, keeping a watchful eye on his date. Date. He couldn't get over it - he was on a date with Elisabeth Bennet, the woman who had preoccupied his mind for the past half-year or so.
Seven stops later they exited, pushing their way out into the clear night air. The sun had completely set while they were speeding along underground, and the streetlights made haloes on the concrete sidewalk. The streets were busy with traffic, full of honking cars and people shouting colorful phrases that made Elisa laugh.
"I love nights like these." She said, as they walked past two taxicab drivers in a humorous heated argument. "Sometimes when I'm feeling low, I'll go out and just soak up the nightlife. It always revs me up ... the excitement in the air. Can't you feel it?"
He looked at her curiously. "I've never really thought about it."
"Really?" Her eyes were bright and lively. "Haven't you ever gone out just to go out?"
"You mean, walk around for the heck of it?" The idea seemed ridiculous.
"Yes."
"No."
She pretended to be shocked. "And how long have you lived in Manhattan?"
"All my life."
Elisa rolled her eyes. "Clearly, you've missed out on a few things, Mr. Darcy."
"William." He corrected her as they walked up to the restaurant. Holding open the doors, he bent his head down toward hers as she walked past. "Call me William, please."
She blushed again, feeling the heat of his breath on her cheek.
"Welcome to The Craft, Mr. Darcy." A female attendant approached them and took their coats. "We have your table ready. If you'll follow me?"
"Does everyone know who you are?" Elisa stage whispered, causing Darcy to chuckle.
"Not everyone." He pulled out her chair. "I remember a time, in a coffee-shop..."
"Oh, hush." She sat down, slightly embarrassed. "You know, I already apologized for that."
"I know." He grinned. "I just like seeing you blush."
The attendant handed them their menus and discreetly departed. After a few minutes, Elisa looked to Darcy for help.
"Since when do I have to think like a chef?" She pointed to the menu. "How does this work?"
He smiled. "Basically you decide what you want to eat and how you want it cooked, pick out a side dish that goes with it, and they make it for you."
"Too many choices." She furrowed her brow. "Couldn't have made this easy, could you?" She kidded.
"Nothing is easy in life." Especially falling for you.
"That was nice."
They walked lazily along the outer rim of Central Park, enjoying the cool weather after a lovely dinner. After partaking in a simple meal of braised white corn and rosemary chicken with polenta, they hailed a cab to the Theatre District where Elisa promptly decided they would take an after-dinner stroll.
"You liked dinner?" Darcy asked, after a moment.
"It was delicious." She sighed, her stomach pleasantly full. "I gained at least two pounds."
Darcy grinned in the dark. If another woman had said that in his company, he would have thought her self-absorbed and fishing for compliments. But Elisa... she was different. She made fun of her own faults, whether they were imaginary or real, and he liked her all the more for it. As they rounded the corner on Central Park South, she led him over to the Columbus Circle bus stop.
"What are you planning for the rest of the night?" He asked, looking around at the other waiting people.
"You're game for a movie, right? Or rather, a video? There's a Blockbuster near my place. We can rent something and watch it at my apartment, if that sounds okay with you?" In the back recesses of her mind, a voice was screaming for her to shut up; but somehow the words slipped out of her mouth. Great. Now he thinks I'm putting out.
Her place? "That sounds good to me. Lead the way." Okay, definitely don't read too much into this.
Taking the M104, they got off on 8th Ave, between 49th and 50th, in front of the Food Emporium. "I live over there." She unnecessarily pointed to one of the buildings as they crossed the street. "Blockbuster's just around the corner." For God's sake, stop babbling.
She's nervous, and she's making me nervous. Change topics. "What's your favorite movie?" He asked suddenly as they entered the store.
"Huh?" She faltered. Well, at least that shut me up for a second.
"What's your favorite movie of all time?" He asked again as he walked up to the drama section that took up several rows.
"Why do you want to know?"
He smiled playfully at her, a trifle more relaxed than he was earlier. "It'll give me some insight into your character. So?"
"Um..." She chewed at her lip while she thought. "Can I pick more than one?"
"Sure." He picked up a video and studied the back cover.
"Breakfast At Tiffany's." Elisa said as she scanned the rows for something familiar.
"Why?"
She smiled fondly at the memory. "My first Audrey Hepburn movie." She shrugged.
"What else?" He moved down the aisle.
"Schindler's List." She held it up to show him. "Because it was powerful on so many levels."
"Not much of a date movie, though." His lips quirked upwards.
"Apocalypse Now?"
"Same goes ... I thought you'd be more of the romantic comedy type."
"Why, because I'm a girl?" She drifted over to the comedy section.
"No comment." Darcy walked over to join her. "I'll refrain from saying anything to insult you or your tastes in chick flicks." He covered his mouth with his hand in mock shock. "Oops, did I say that out loud?"
"You're terrible!" She laughed. "And anyway, it's my choice tonight. You can pick next time."
Did she just imply there will be a 'next time'? Progress! "Deal."
"How's this?" She swooped up a video and dramatically handed it over to him. He grinned, then took a look at the video she handed him and groaned. "Don't make that sound. I love this movie!"
"This is the typical guy response to a chick flick. Excuse me while I go vomit outside." He joked.
"Definitely this one, then." She grinned evilly and paid for the rental. They stepped outside and began walking over to her apartment building. Impulsively, she reached for his hand, holding it like he had held hers earlier that night. He smiled inwardly at the contact. It was the first time she voluntarily made a move to touch him.
It appeared that things were looking up.
Chapter 54
"Do you mind waiting while I change into something more comfortable?" Elisa asked as took off her coat and hung it in the closet on the left wall of her apartment's small foyer. She repeated the process after Darcy handed her his coat, momentarily stopping at the sight of the two of their coats hanging together side-by-side; it was kind of stupid, but the idea - however fleeting - of them truly being in an amorous relationship made her slightly giddy.
"No, of course not." Darcy walked past the built-in kitchen on the right into the living room. It was nicely furnished, with a plush rose-colored sofa standing on carved wooden legs over a patterned rug on the hardwood floors. Low bookshelves lined one wall and wooden end tables topped with flowers flanked the sofa.
"I'll be right back. Make yourself at home." She disappeared into the bedroom on the left, closing the door.
So this is how she lives, he thought while looking at the delicate porcelain and glass figurines in the curio cabinet next to the entertainment unit that housed a medium sized TV, a VCR, and a few videos. The apartment was larger than he had thought originally, and the building much nicer than he had anticipated, complete with a cheerful uniformed doorman out front. The room was modest, yet stylish, comfortable, and definitely female. He plucked a flower from the arrangement on one of the end tables, admiring its bloom.
"Do you want anything to drink?" Elisa appeared a few minutes later and walked over to the kitchen. She had changed into cranberry colored velour drawstring pants and white henley top. He fancied she was more relaxed now that she had shed her stiff business wear for clothes that were more her style. "I have bottled water, 7-Up, peach juice, and some wine coolers." She rose from her crouched position in front of the refrigerator. She lifted a brow. "What's your poison, William?"
He grinned. "7-Up sounds good." She began rummaging through her cabinets for glasses. "You don't mind if I take off my jacket, do you?"
She looked up. "Not at all." She tried not to look obvious as she stole looks at him while he partially disrobed. He loosened his tie, and after debating with himself for several seconds, took it off entirely. The ice cubes clink loudly as her hands slipped while watching him undo the top two buttons of his shirt, but he didn't notice. She twisted off the cap of the two-liter bottle, pouring out two glasses of soda. She absolutely did not want to think about how nicely toned his forearms were, as he meticulously rolled up his sleeves.
"Here you go." She padded over to the sofa, setting his glass down on the coffee table.
"Thanks. I'll set up the video. Why don't you sit down?" He popped the video into the VCR and fiddled a bit with the remote controls before it ran smoothly. She reached over to switch off the floor lamp, the darkness falling over them like a congenial curtain. He settled down to her right, sitting close to the center but not crossing the division that separated the two cushions. I wish she'd move closer, he thought, balking at the idea of scooting over to her side of the sofa. Give me a little sign here.
This is weird. Elisa snuck a peek at the man sitting besides her. Should I move closer? She was nestled uncomfortably in the corner between the sofa back and the armrest on her end. Does he want me to? And if I do, will he prop his arm around my shoulder like guys do, and will I mind?
She tried to get her mind on the movie, but her insecurities were getting the best of her. Finally, in a move that defied rational behavior (well, at least her usual behavior), Elisa took a deep breath and scooted, ever so discreetly, eight inches to her right. Her knee brushed his left leg, causing him to look over. She thought she saw a little of surprise and pleasure in his eyes, and slowly a sort of contentment washed over her.
This isn't so bad, she thought, trying to keep her confidence up. It wouldn't do if he knew that she was scared of silly things like sitting close to an utterly divine looking man whom she gradually found herself attracted to.
Okay, that's definitely a sign, right? Do I put my arm around her? Hold her hand? What? It bothered him that he had forgotten how to conduct himself properly on what was essentially a first date. He had dated women before, he told himself. So why was he acting like such a bloody idiot? Goodbye normally cool self, hello Mr. Insecurity, he thought wryly. Okay, just breathe. You're in good form here. She made the first move, now you make yours.
She laughed at something Billy Crystal's character said on the TV. "Do you think that's true?" She looked at him now, her face glowing with mirth.
"Excuse me, what?" That's good. Don't pay attention to one of her favorite movies. Smooth. He wanted to kick himself.
"That men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way?"
"Um, no?" He looked confused. Sex?
She rolled her eyes and nudged him lightly with her elbow. "Pay attention to the movie, William. You'll like it. I promise."
He smiled, trying to relax. "What do I get if I don't?"
"What do you want?"
"Madam, that is a dangerous question." He responded playfully, feeling more at ease.
"A kiss, then." Good god, where did that come from?
If he was shocked, he didn't show it. "Ten. For watching a chick flick, a man deserves some compensation." He gave her a cheeky smile.
"Ten? One." She giggled.
"I love a good negotiation. Eight?"
"One."
"Five?"
"One." Her eyes were shining with amusement.
"You know, negotiations take some compromise on your part." He very nearly pouted.
"One." She nodded.
"Fine. But now I'm going to not like the movie on purpose."
Her heart felt lighter than it did in months. It felt good to laugh; it felt good to feel again that lovely rush of pleasure when in company with someone of the opposite sex. Is this romance? She noticed that at the end of their exchange, he had rested his arm on the edge of the sofa back, his fingers dangling gently, barely touching the top of her left shoulder. She reached up her right arm, grasping his hand lightly and bringing it down until it settled warmly on her shoulder.
I think it is.
Holding Janine in his arms, Bingley snuggled closer as they watched TV while sprawled out on the couch in her living room. He was thinking about how nice it would be to see a miniature version of her with the same strawberry blonde hair bouncing around the apartment, when she interrupted his thoughts.
"Charles, today Elisa came down and told me the most interesting news."
"Oh?"
"She said that she and Mr. Darcy were going on a date tonight. Isn't that wonderful?"
"Tonight?" He sat up, nearly knocking her off the couch in his haste. "Are you sure?"
"Yes? What is it?"
He cheered excitedly. "I can't believe. That sly dog! Can I use your phone? I have to tell Richard. I was going to call him earlier, but he wasn't in."
She handed him the cordless. He eagerly pushed the buttons, nearly bursting with enthusiasm.
"Fitzwilliam." A voice answered after two rings.
"Richard, it's Charles."
"Hi. What's up?" Richard replied. "Wait, is something wrong? Where are you?"
"No, of course not. I'm at Janine's"
"Oh. Then... what?"
"She just told me the most amusing news. I bet you'll never guess in a million years where Darce is right at the moment."
Knowing that Bingley's good-humored guessing games could last forever, Richard got to the point. "No, I probably can't. Why don't you tell me?"
"He's on a date." On the other end of line he heard something loud clatter to the floor. "What happened? Are you alright?"
"I just dropped a bottle of beer. Nothing to worry about. What did you say again?"
Bingley chuckled. "Darce is on a date. With Elisa Bennet."
That was the kicker. Richard started exclaiming happily, completely taken aback that it had finally happened. "He told you? Are you sure?"
"A hundred percent. This is a good thing."
"Definitely. Look, I'll talk to you tomorrow. I have to call someone and spread the news."
"Sure." Bingley turned back to Janine, who was looking at him curiously. "What?"
"He'll be good to her, right?" She asked, unsure. "I know he's a nice man, but I would hate it if he hurt her. She's been through so much pain in her life, she doesn't need another heartbreak."
"He'll be the best." He assured her. "They'll both be good for each other."
"Richard? Is something wrong?" Georgiana said when she picked up the phone. "Do you know where William is? It's almost ten and he's not home yet."
"Don't worry about him. I have some good news."
"So he's alright?" Georgiana sighed, relieved.
"Yes, he's fine. Now ask me about the news."
"What is it?"
"You brother is on a date tonight." Richard imparted.
"With who? Why didn't he tell me beforehand? Wait... what about Elisa?"
Richard laughed, amused at her multitude of questions. "That's the thing: it's with Elisa."
There was a brief silence before her shriek. "WHAT? Are you sure? Who told you? Why did he tell me? Why didn't she tell me?"
"He's on date. Yes. Charles. And probably because they didn't want us butting in." He answered patiently, but she could hear his restrained excitement. "It seems they did rather fine on their own, didn't they?"
"I guess. But we're taking the credit, right?"
"Oh yes, absolutely." They both grinned into their phones.
"...I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle in your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." *
"That's my favorite part." Elisa said softly. Darcy grinned down at her. The movie came to an end a few minutes later. They sat closer together while the credits scrolled onscreen, each thinking how pleasantly the night had turned out. The VCR automatically stopped the video, setting it to rewind. The both rose at the same moment, realizing that the night was indeed finally over.
Slowly, he rolled down his sleeves, and putting his jacket on, he boyishly stuffed his tie into his pocket. They walked over to the small foyer, and she opened the closet and took out his coat.
"This is was nice." She said while she helped him into his coat.
"More than nice." He said, turning around to face her.
She opened the door and he stepped over the threshold. "I wouldn't mind doing it again, sometime." She admitted.
He gave her that irresistible Darcy smile, slow and sweet. "Me either... But next time, I choose the movie."
"Oh? Are you sure that wasn't you laughing in there tonight? I'm almost certain that you enjoyed it."
"Oh no." He moved slightly closer. "I didn't like it all. In fact, I hated it. It was terrible..."
She grinned. "Hmm?"
"I believe I was promised a kiss." He leaned in, his breath warm on her cheek. He made a nuzzling movement, brushing his nose with hers like a cute puppy might do.
"One." She whispered a split-second before he touched his lips to hers. He ran his hands up her arms, gently pulling her close enough that she could feel the incredible heat from his body. There was that spark of electricity, that flicker of a newly-discovered passion; it made her tingle with anticipation. He pulled away after a while, his eyes burning with an intensity she had rarely seen.
Before she could think better of it, she reached up, her hands to his face, and pulled him in for another kiss. It was impulsive, but it was delicious. He felt like his skin was on fire, as she seduced him with her tender yet ardent hums of approval. After a minute or so, she stepped away, a beguiling smile on her lips.
"What was that for?" He asked after he had regained his breath.
She shrugged, artlessly. "Because I wanted to." He seemed rather stunned, but in a good way. "I'll see you tomorrow?"
"Oh, absolutely." He replied confidently. "Goodnight then." He seemed to drift down the hall, every so often turning back to check that it was truly she that was there, that he had kissed, and not some ghost of his imagination. She gave him a little wave, as if to assure him that yes, she really was there. He laughed to himself. And as he stepped into the elevator and descended to the ground floor, he felt for the first in a long time his heart overflowing with joy.
* from When Harry Met Sally
Chapter 55
"He was humming when he got home." Georgiana whispered, looking around to make sure no one was eavesdropping. "He probably thought I was sleeping. But when he walked by my door, I could totally hear him humming."
"Like 'I just got laid' humming?" Richard picked up her can of soda and took a sip.
She slapped his hand. "Stop it. Get your own. And no, not that kind of humming."
"Right." He stole a cherry tomato from the top of her salad and popped it into his mouth. "If he had gotten some last night, he'd be singing."
"You are so crude." Georgiana shoved him off the edge of her desk where he had been sitting for the past few minutes. "I'm never asking you to have lunch with me again."
"Don't get into a snit." He grinned. "Okay, so what kind of humming was it?"
"Like 'I just went on a really fabulous date' humming. Has he said anything to you about this yet?"
"Nope. I sat through the morning meeting, hung back a little after it was over - not even a peep. But he was smiling. Kind of looked like he wanted to hum, too, I guess. Did Elisa say anything?"
Georgiana looked over at her friend and assistant's unoccupied desk. "Nothing. She looked happy, though... William hasn't been on a date in ages, you know."
"I know."
"So I guess you also know how big and important this is."
"Yes, Ana."
Georgiana poked at the lettuce with her fork.
"What? You're worried already? A minute ago you were ecstatic for them."
She shrugged. "I worry about William all the time. He thinks that I don't, that I shouldn't, but I do."
"We all do, dear." Richard patted her hand.
"The last time with Natalia... I don't know. I really thought it was going to work. It looked like he was crazy about her, too; but when I saw her in L.A., she said that William was never in love with her. It kind of threw me off, I guess... I just want him to be happy. I know Elisa can do that for him - make him happy."
"I think it'll work out this time." He gave her an encouraging smile. "We just have to have a little faith."
"And push and manipulate them until they do fall in love, right?" Georgiana asked after a few seconds.
"That, too."
The next few weeks passed like a dream. May had finally come to a close, and the Añya team had put the last finishing touches on the Fall and Winter lines. Designs were sent to the manufacturing facilities where the pieces would be produced in limited quantities. Calls were made to high-end retail stores and exclusive boutiques, confirming purchases and garnering promises of keeping the Añya label in stores for the next season. Elisa's days were filled with extensive paperwork and effusive schmoozing of rich fashion busybodies.
But her nights were filled with another thing, completely. The day after their first date, Darcy had met her for lunch in a café near Pemberley. He tried not too seem overly eager, but was pretty sure that Elisa could see through his act. He was nervous - but it was a good nervous, the kind with butterflies in the stomach and wild imaginings of her rebuffing him (that made him laugh later when he thought about it). They were on better terms now.
Elisa was nervous, too. She was sure that Darcy could see that, in her quick movements, the touches of their hands never lasting quite long enough for encouragement. The kisses on the first night had been an anomaly for her, the heat almost too much and too soon. How long had they known each other, really? How well?... But gradually, the fears waned (though they always remained in the back of her mind) and she had learned to relax more in his company. By the end of the third week, she could hold his hand without pulling back, kiss his lips without worrying too much about the future, instead thinking of the here and now.
They had gone out several times since the first night. Sometimes it was a romantic dinner, a quiet night at her apartment watching videos, or a lingering stroll through Soho on a weekend afternoon. Othertimes it was a brisk jog in Central Park, a gastronomic adventure in Chinatown, or a night out on the town, catching a rousing performance at one of the many theatres around Broadway.
In those few weeks with Elisa, Darcy had seen more of the city he had called home his whole life than he had seen collectively in his twenty-eight years. Or so it seemed. Before, it had always felt like he never had the time, but with Elisa he always made the time. He supposed he had never had the inclination or reason to see the city. But she pressed him in her gentle way to see everything around him, to take in the people, the buildings, the atmosphere that virtually shimmered with an impossible vibrancy - and to make that his own.
The city was like her, he voiced one day to her delighted surprise. Beautiful, mysterious, and exciting. He realized later that night that he wanted to know both better, spend the rest of his life memorizing each moment, each feature. But things were moving faster that he had anticipated, and probably entirely due to his persistence. She had been reluctant at first, but he imagined that by now he had rubbed off on her.
Plague her with familiarity; get her used to your touch, your presence. Make sure she knows that you're interested and that you're not going anywhere anytime soon.
The weather was optimistically warming up. It was safe now to venture outside without heavy coats. Come July, Darcy thought, it'd be positively sultry. What was now glowing and comfortable would soon be overshadowed by oppressive humidity and smothering heat. The flowers were out in bloom, maniacally showering the drab grayness of the city with their bright colors and teasing perfumes.
The flowers made him think of Elisa. The frantic, jittery traffic outside his window made him think of Elisa. Heck, even the smell of his morning coffee made him think of Elisa. Of how she would lose that initial uncertainty in her manner, resolutely take his hand, and begin chatting about any little thing. He didn't think there were ever that many things to know about the production of corduroy or the use of symbolism in T.S. Eliot's "The Hollow Men". Elisa was, as he discovered, well read and intelligent. Sometimes she shied away, hiding behind idle chatter; but as her defenses dropped, a curiously fascinating side of her emerged before his eyes.
No, she wasn't stupid and she wasn't naïve. And she didn't give two figs about whether or not they went to the most expensive restaurants or were seen at the most posh public arenas, like other women he had taken out briefly in his previously vain attempts at securing a love life (that didn't include living vicariously through his friends). In fact, Elisa preferred sitting in the plaza across from Radio City Music Hall and sharing a pretzel, or doing just about anything simple and fun.
She was a no-fuss type of girl. Not that she minded fuss, when it was required. But during her free time it easier to jump into jeans and a t-shirt than it was to slick on some dress and trounce about in heels.
Not that Elisa was the type to trounce. She glided.
Yes, he did like the look of her. The physical attraction had always been there, even on some small, elemental level. But now that attraction had double, tripled... been complicated by a burgeoning emotional attraction, as well. He had, in the best sense, a primal need for her.
It scared him when he thought about it, so he tried not to. He didn't even want to imagine what she'd do if he ever told her how deep his feelings ran. This early in the relationship? She'd freak out. He'd freak out, as if saying it aloud made it real. And they'd both go into inexplicable histrionics.
No, he wouldn't tell her just yet. Darcy knew that Elisa liked him, cared for him. But loved him? Maybe not just yet. Secretly, in a sort of masochistic way, it pleased him. It meant that he had to work to woo her, to make her feel for him as deeply as he felt for her. If he had wanted some meaningless fling, he could have easily found some single woman in Manhattan that wanted to be "flung" by Mr. Darcy, CEO of Pemberley, Inc. It was never William with them, never the man but the image. Elisa had seen the image and sneered. She had also seen the man. And what did she think of him?
She was humming one fine summer day, thinking about nothing in particular, when the envelope came. It was oversized and somewhat thick. She flipped it to the front and noticed from the timestamp that the missive had be sent nearly a month ago, misdirected, returned back to the post office, and then re-sent to her current address. There was no return address, but she had a feeling she knew exactly what was inside.
Walking into the kitchen, she turned on the gas stove with every intention of burning it up.
How could they? Why would they even think that I'd want to go, that I'd want to see them?
Suddenly, tears were welling up and she didn't have a clue where they came from. All the memories, the arguments and resentments came flooding back. Wasn't it enough that they had hurt her? Did they have to push it in her face, remind her at every turn that love wasn't true and the heart could shatter into millions of pieces?
She turned off the gas, her hands trembling. Get a hold of yourself, girl. Would you let them have the pleasure of knowing they could hurt you still, after all these years?
"No." She said firmly, aloud. "No way in hell am I letting this bother me. Not anymore." She took a black Sharpie that was lying on the counter, wrote an address in the top left corner, then scrawled the words "Return to Sender" on the front in large letters.
Damned if they were going to get a stamp out of her, let alone her congratulations.
© 2000, 2001, 2002 Copyright held by the author.