Beginning, Previous Section, Section VIII, Next Section
Chapter 27, Parts I and II
If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn't plan it properly. Nick Lappos.
The Duchess lay curled up fighting the feeling that she was about to wake up. Suddenly a shaft of light pierced into her brain.
"Rise and shine your Grace! It is a beautiful morning."
Maria had opened the curtains, and was busy humming her way around the room.
The Duchess muttered while trying to sit up without losing the warmth of her bedclothes. "Has Teddy returned?"
"Lord Holling returned late last night apparently, according to the porter and left again quite early this morning."
"He left again?" said the Duchess, confused. What on earth was going on with Teddy?
The Duchess shook her head and went to take her bath.
George Wickham leapt up the steps to the Hollingbury house. The porter opened the door to him and Wickham swept into the breakfast parlour.
The Duchess looked up and then sighed.
"Is that the welcome I'm to receive?"
"No George, it's not you, its just that Teddy has been acting very strange, he did not come home until the wee hours of the morning, or so I'm informed and now he is out again!"
"Well your Grace he is a big boy."
"George...." Said The Duchess warningly. "If you have come for money you are really doing yourself out of a favour!"
Wickham attacked some of the breakfast laid out on the table, before dignifying the Duchess's comment with a response.
"Well, I was actually here to see whether you needed me to escort you anywhere, but now you come to mention it I am a bit low on funds."
"Need an escort! I don't need an escort...." The duchess ruminated for a moment. "Though I may need an accomplice."
Wickham looked up from the bread he was buttering.
"What are you thinking of murdering somebody?"
"Well the thought had crossed my mind." Replied the Duchess.
Wickham stared at her. "You aren't serious are you!"
"Yes I am in fact. I am heartily sick of the present generations inability to see what is clearly in front of their noses. So I was hoping you would help me, show them."
"By committing homicide??"
"Oh George, keep up! Not by committing a crime per se, but something to make all these silly children realise..."
"Realise what?"
"That they have found their soul mates!"
"Soul Mates??"
'Yes, what don't you understand George?"
"Quite a lot of things really...but if I can grasp what you are saying, you are asking me to help you plan something whereby a lot of people will realise they are in love?"
"Yes something like that."
"And you think I can come up with a plan, when you are having trouble thinking one up."
"I'm not having trouble thinking a plan up, I have several perfectly good plans in mind, I'm just waiting to have one of them confirmed."
"Right, well....in that case. My humble opinion is that rowing is the most romantic of things."
" Rowing?"
'Yes form a large party, and then surreptitiously put the people you want to fall in love in boats. They are alone then, but not alone."
"And where would you suggest we go Rowing? On the ocean?"
"No at Shoreham-by-Sea."
"Excellent notion. I think you have hit the nail on the head. So how large would you make this party George?"
"Very large. That way a few missing people won't be noticed. If they don't take the opportunity I think there is no hope."
"Well they will, or at least I'll make sure they take advantage of the opportunity!"
Wickham laughed. His head turned as a footman surreptitiously opened the door and slid over to the Duchess. He handed her a note on a plate.
Wickham watched as the Duchess's face turned a sort of purplish hue. "Something wrong your Grace?"
"Men!" she exploded. "Stupid Boy, what is he playing at?" Then she seemed to calm down. "George if you could possibly draw up a list of people to invite, consult Maria, she knows enough boring people that can fill up space. Also if you could organise the boats, you know....be a darling."
"Yes your Grace. And may I inquire what you will be doing."
"Committing justifiable homicide."
"As long as you are occupied."
Kitty sat staring at the dresser. What had happened? Her mind drifted to the previous day:
She had returned home and gone straight to her bedroom to cry her eyes out, an unknown period of time elapsed before her mother had burst into her room.
"Oh Kitty! My darling girl! You are going to be a duchess! Oh my nerves, I don't think they will take it!"
Kitty sat up and gaped at her mother. "Mama what are you talking about? Why am I going to be Duchess?"
"Oh you stupid child! Lord Holling has offered for you! Of course you will be a Marchioness first, but in the end you will be a Duchess."
Kitty's mouth dropped open. "Lord Holling did what???"
"Offered for you! Oh think of the pin money." Mrs Bennet started to preen herself in front of the mirror muttering about soirees and glittering parties and balls, hosted by her daughter, the Duchess of Hollingbury.
Kitty leapt off her bed and grabbed her mother by both arms. "Where is Lord Holling Mama?"
"Downstairs with your Papa! Probably discussing how much money he is going to lavish on you!"
Kitty fled down the stairs and ran into Lord Holling standing in the hall with her father.
"Papa, do you mind if I just speak to Lord Holling for a moment." Said Kitty before dragging Lord Holling into the parlour and slamming the door.
"What are you doing!" shrieked Kitty not caring how vulgar she sounded. She did not want to go from one unwanted engagement to another! And she wasn't even disengaged from Mr Collins... she couldn't be engaged to two men at once it was ludicrous.
"Miss Bennet." Said Lord Holling soothingly. "Sit down here."
Kitty unwillingly complied with his request.
"Miss Bennet. Mr Collins is a completely unworthy man. No woman should have to marry him. Especially someone like you Miss Bennet. I think you are a wonderful girl; you always seem to have this charm about you, and its very refreshing to have someone like you about. I don't know you seem to inspire a desire to protect. I just couldn't have you marry Mr Collins."
Kitty just looked at Lord Holling. "That's very sweet Lord Holling, but couldn't you have talked to me about it first, instead of telling my mother? She is not precisely known for her silence on such matters. Also I hate to point this out to you, but I'm still engaged to Mr Collins."
"Your engagement to him isn't public, it can be broken, and then perhaps Mr Collins can meet with a slight accident."
Kitty giggled. "Lord Holling, as I said it is very sweet but...."
Kitty got no further for the whirlwind that was Mrs Bennet arrived. Kitty tried to get a word in edgewise, but with her mother having what looked like an apoplectic fit every time she breathed....it was rather difficult.
Kitty had no idea what to do. She didn't want to marry Mr Collins, she would prefer to marry Lord Holling, but if given a larger choice, she'd prefer not to marry him either. But she didn't' appear to be given this choice. From her mother's long and in-depth discussion about wedding clothes to her father's looks of relief, mingled with worry, Kitty wasn't' sure what was going on. She was overwhelmed by the fuss that seemed to have started, especially when her sisters entered the room and were told the news... with embellishments.
Kitty just sat there feeling like she was floating away, if she stopped this right now, she might have to marry Mr Collins, but if she didn't stop this right now she might have to marry Lord Holling.
She met his eyes across the room, and immediately sensed he was just as overwhelmed. But knowing he was overwhelmed didn't help her feelings whatsoever. She was still very confused.
Kitty looked up from her mirror, and now a day later she was still completely confused. Too many things were happing way too fast.
Part Two.
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.~ H.G Wells.
Mary hid in the linen closet; she had wedged the door shut behind her before curling up on one of the shelves to compose her letter. She had to hide in the closet because the house was in an uproar. Well there wasn't really a time when it wasn't in an uproar, but at the moment it was more uproarious than usual. Kitty was apparently marrying a duke, or perhaps someone who was going to become a duke. Mary didn't quite understand and she was under the distinct impression that Kitty didn't' understand either, but was having a hard time conveying this to Mama. Especially since the only words out of Mama's mouth for the last day were: Duke, Marriage and Ooooh my Nerves.
Mary spread out her paper and dipped the pen in the inkpot, which proceeded to splash onto the fine linen. Mary dabbed ineffectually at the stain, but only succeeded in spreading it, so she gave up and simply started to write. It was rather hard to write while cramped on a shelf, and when writing on a soft surface, so her text careered and sloshed its way across the page.
Dear Sir Christian,
It is highly improper of me to write to you, but it would be more improper to ever see you again. I am returning this blasphemous book to you, only partially read.
Mary paused, that was a slight lie, and in fact it was a very large lie. She had read the entire book.... Twice from cover to cover and she had the bags under her eyes plus the melted candles to prove it. But she couldn't tell him that.
I think you shamefully impertinent and I hope never to see you again.
Mary paused. What else to say?
Also I think you should become acquainted with the words of Reverend Fordyce. I think you a rake.
Mary gave an unladylike groan of annoyance when her pen pierced the paper after her overzealous dot after rake. She couldn't think of much else to say and her writing was filling up the page anyway, so she ended the letter as succinctly as she could.
Not respectfully at all Mary Bennet.
Mary blotted the letter fairly successfully and sealed it. She paused before scrawling Sir Christian Montgomery. Surely someone would know where to find him. She attached the letter to the already rewrapped book, and went in search of a trusted servant.
Sir Christian sat in Donaldson's Library.
Where had all the beautiful yet flirtatious girls gone? Oh right, this was a library. There were only mild meek proper young ladies here. Then why was he here?
Sir Christian scowled. He had a very large suspicion that the reason he was sitting in a library, and damaging his reputation, was female, impertinent and answered to the name of Mary.
He shifted uncomfortably as a middle age woman, who practically had governess written across her forehead, gave a gasp and herded her group of rather dowdy charges away from 'the big bad rake'.
He brightened considerably as a group of men entered the library. He could just pretend he had been waiting for them! However his hopes were dashed when he recognised the first man as Darcy. Darcy and Sir Christian were not friends, in fact Sir Christian could recognise and categorise Darcy's glares at ten paces having been the recipient of them countless times.
This particular glare for example said. "Oh you. What are you doing here, have you lost your way? Not recognised the sign perhaps?" It was really a classic Darcy glare.
Sir Christian smiled and nodded in his lazy way as the men passed, Bingley as per usual following Darcy, as did Colonel Fitzwilliam, the last member detached and fell into a seat by Sir Christian.
"Monty."
"Miles."
"What are you doing here? Incredibly damaging to your reputation as a scandalous rake, to be seen in a place of intellect."
"You call a library a place of intellect? Isn't novel reading supposed to be the number one corrupter of the innocent?"
Miles arched one eyebrow. Sir Christian shrugged.
"Oh by the by Monty, I managed to pick up some very rare pieces of literature recently, and some of them are duplicates of pieces already in the Carlon collection."
"Very interested."
"You know, I can't help but think how shocked people would be if they knew of the effort, industrious effort at that, that goes into the maintenance of your reputation as a lazy good for nothing."
"Well you know I could not have the apoplectic fits of most of the haut ton on my conscience so I will just have to continue in my little charade. Won't I?"
"I have rapidly come to the conclusion that you are wicked Monty. Only a wicked person could possibly enjoy being something he's not."
"But I am being myself!"
"Of course you are." Laughed Miles, before another scary middle-aged woman shushed him.
The men exchanged looks of amusement before a servant interrupted them.
"Sir Christian Montgomery?"
"Yes that is I?"
"I was instructed by my mistress to give you this."
Miles stared at the servant then stared at Sir Christian who simply took the package and the letter without question.
"Is she waiting for a response?"
"No sir." Replied the servant stiffly before walking off.
Sir Christian unsealed the letter, conscious of the querying look of his friend.
His attention was turned next to the parcel, which he unwrapped.
He looked at the book then he looked at the letter. He looked at the letter then he looked at the book.
Sir Christian promptly burst into muffled laughter.
Miles leaning over his shoulders to read both the letter and the title of the book and gave a low exclamation.
"Monty what are you doing? You can't give a book like that to a young lady, especially not if she is Mary Bennet. She will probably tell her parents and well you'll get yourself into further trouble."
"Mary Bennet liked this book."
"She didn't finish it Monty. She says so right there." Said Miles jabbing at the relevant section.
"Then why is this pathetic attempt at cross-stitch placed right at the end of the book as a bookmark? And why is candle wax dripped over these pages? I knew she would like it!"
There was a thudding sound as Miles' head hit the table.
"Miles?"
"I'm not asking Monty! I'm really not asking."
"I wouldn't if I were you. I don't think I know the answer."
Miles rolled his eyes. "You give her a book, that book and you don't have the answer?"
"I'll put it into language you understand shall I? Lets see, ah yes. Miles why do you like Lady Annabelle?"
Miles, resting his head on his arms, swivelled his neck to see Sir Christian. "Okay, I concede that you don't have to have the answer. But I really think you are digging your own grave."
"Well it's something I haven't tried before. I enjoy new experiences."
"But just to clarify one point before I desist in meddling in your affairs. You do know this is the Mary Bennet, who according to Ricky, in the middle of a dance berated Darcy on not being well read, and told him he should start an improving course, starting with The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire."
Sir Christian grinned. "I knew there was a reason she interested me!"
Kitty paced. She could do this it was really quite simple.
Papa, I do not want to marry Mr Collins, I really don't think I want to marry Lord Holling. You are my father; you get me out of this.
Kitty sighed, turned and started to pace again. This time however she ran into something, a podgy sort of something.
"Mr Collins!" she exclaimed repulsed, then she caught sight of his face. "Mr Collins!"
Mr Collins face was now a purplish hue; he sported quite a black eye, along with other minor scrapes.
"I had decided not to show my face, to you my sweet hibiscus, until it had healed. But I was too impatient to look upon my delphinium like fiancée again!"
Kitty backed away in fright. "Er Mr Collins. I really think perhaps...Mr Collins." Kitty tried to ward off Mr Collin's advances, but she was unsuccessful. She did manage to kick a footstool in Mr Collins path, but that only caused him to stumble and flail his arms in the general direction of her chest to regain his balance.
Kitty closed her eyes in horror as Mr Collins puckered up. Nothing happened, no slimy descent, Kitty opened one eye cautiously but all she saw was Lord Holling. She opened both eyes and found that Mr Collins was now sprawled on a couch, and Lord Holling held a cane in one hand.
She fought overwhelming desire to throw her arms around him. Instead she beamed at him.
"Oh thank you so much."
"It was a pleasure Miss Bennet."
"If you are going to save me from horrible slimy creatures the least you can do is call me Kitty."
Lord Holling smiled. "Very well. Then I guess you should call me Teddy."
Lord Holling felt a little, well, stripped when he allowed Miss Bennet to call him by her first name.
He offered her his hand as she avoided the prone body of Mr Collins.
They walked in silence to the hall.
"Thank you again..." Kitty hesitated for a moment before continuing, "Teddy. He doesn't' seem to take no for an answer." She smiled up at Lord Holling, and thought that marrying him would be infinitely more preferable to marrying Mr Collins. Mama had always said that marriage was about an alliance, not love. Kitty had always thought love should play a part, but she wasn't in love with anyone, at least she didn't think she was. What was love? Was thinking someone was attractive and enjoying their company love? She didn't know. No she really shouldn't' think about things like that.
Lord Holling smiled back. He watched a wistful look cross Kitty's face and felt nervy. What was wrong? Was he supposed to do something? Lord Holling, though the courageous and honourable type, had never asked a girl to marry him before.
Acting partly by instinct and partly from gleaned knowledge from his married friends, Lord Holling dropped his head and found Kitty's lips with his. Kitty wallowing in her mental tug of war, suddenly found herself being kissed. It wasn't like being kissed by Mr Collins, Mr Collins mauled and poked and prodded and drooled. With Mr Collins Kitty felt like fighting, with this she wanted to kiss back, and she did.
Lord Holling now wasn't sure how to stop? Did he want to stop? He flicked his eyes open wondering if that would help, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Kitty's sister, Lizzy looking at him. That made him stop.
Kitty felt Lord Holling pull away and look at something over her shoulder; Kitty turned her neck and saw Lizzy arching an eyebrow at her before scurrying up the stairs. Lord Holling found one hand had unconsciously gone to Kitty's neck. He shot a look at the stairs. Lord Holling mediated on the other information he had gained from his married friends: never get caught in a compromising position if you wanted to remain a bachelor. Found in a compromising position. Indeed.
Kitty sensed Lord Holling's reserve and stepped back.
"Miss Bennet." He bowed quickly and left the house.
Kitty gazed at the shut door and bit her lip. She heard a heavy step on the stair and turned. It was Lizzy, she had one hand on her hip and a cross look on her face.
Kitty turned abruptly into the sitting room. She hoped the presence of Jane and Mary would stop any conversation on what Lizzy had just seen, but she was wrong.
"How could you do that Kitty?"
"Do what?" said Kitty sitting down to fiddle with the arrangement on a bonnet.
"Kiss Lord Holling."
Kitty almost jabbed a needle into herself when Lizzy spoke, she flicked her eyes around the room and found both Mary and Jane looking at her.
On the defensive she replied quickly. "He kissed me."
"Really. From my angle it didn't look like you were fighting him off."
"Why should I fight him off?" replied Kitty confused.
"Why? Because you are going to marry him for his title!"
Kitty blinked. "Is that what you think I'm doing?"
"Yes? Isn't that what you are doing? You don't want to marry Mr Collins, and I understand that, but can't you just say no? Can't you just stand up for yourself? Or do you fancy yourself a Duchess? I didn't think you were like Mama!"
Kitty turned angry eyes upon her sister.
"Well I'm sorry that not everyone can be like you Lizzy. Because I'm not like you; I'm not good at standing up for myself. I'm trying to resolve this situation the best way that I can. And I'm sorry you don't like that, but instead of being angry with me, you could have tried to help me. But noooooo you are too wrapped up in your Mr Darcy."
Kitty stormed out of the room, and stormed out of the house. She took several angry strides up the street, before she realised she was in Brighton. She could not just walk around on her own. Reluctantly she turned around and found herself looking at shiny buttons. The shiny buttons were attached to a waistcoat that was attached to Ash.
"Ash!"
"Miss Bennet." He said formally taking her hand and kissing it.
"I hope you are not doing anything at the moment, because I need a walking companion."
Ash smiled. "I have nothing planned." In an instant an arrangement to meet his friends at the Library was forgotten, or banished to a dark recess of his mind.
Tucking her hand in the crook of his arm, Kitty dragged Ash towards the sea.
"Can I tell you something?"
"Anything."
"Lord Holling asked me to marry him."
Ash stopped walking and turned to Kitty. Several different phrases and thoughts leapt to mind and after a pause he settled on one.
"I suppose it would be incredibly ungentlemanly of me to exclaim "What??" in loud and shocked tones?"
Kitty suppressed a laugh. "Yes it would. He wants to save me from Mr Collins."
Ash's jaw dropped so did his hold on Kitty's arm. He was right. His grandmother had connived to get Kitty married to Teddy! This wasn't right? It really wasn't right? Did she want to marry him? Did she just want a title? A comfortable home?
His world swam a little in front of him as he tried to focus on what he had just been told. What was going on, his life was supposed to be organised. Fun, enjoyable, controlled. He had always been in control. It had been his life; nothing else interfered with the way he ran his life or his lifestyle. In a couple of months it had been turned upside down all from a chance meeting in a wood with a girl, who could be a flirt or a mercenary fortune hunter!
Ash's vision righted itself and all he could see were two frightened eyes looking into his. It was a moment of clarity. No she wasn't a flirt, she wasn't a fortune hunter, she was right. He fought an overwhelming desire to draw her into his arms and never let her go, but he couldn't. What was going on? Oh God. He really had to get out of here. It was too complex. He wasn't in control. He had to be in control, surely. She wanted to Marry Teddy? Did she love Teddy? Oh Hell and damnation. This wasn't good. It really wasn't good.
Kitty looked in fright at Ash. Why wasn't he saying anything? She had been relying on him to tell her what to do. To guide her in the right direction.
"I have to go." He said suddenly, in a constricted voice that he knew sounded nothing like his own.
Kitty watched as he practically sprinted across the road, weaving around two carriages before he was out of sight. She felt bewildered and strangely empty.
Part 3
He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news.~ Bertolt Brecht
Darcy closed his eyes and tried not to swear.
"Well isn't anyone going to say anything?" asked Lord Holling.
"Are you insane? Is the first line that pops into my mind." Said Colonel Fitzwilliam shaking his head at Lord Holling.
"What do you mean?" replied Lord Holling confused.
"Want to tell him Ricky?" Said Miles. "If you are I'd do it fast." Miles nodded in the direction of the Steyne.
Darcy stifled a curse as he realised Ash was heading towards the group clustered outside the library. He disliked public arguments and his disliked public brawls even less.
The group collectively held It's breath as Ash joined them.
"I hear I'm to congratulate you Teddy. You are doing a very noble thing, for a very deserving young lady."
Lord Holling gave a look to the rest of the gentlemen. "Why thank you Ash. Everyone else has seemed devoid of congratulations."
"They are merely jealous Teddy. Now if you gentlemen will excuse me, I have business to attend to."
Ash passed through the group continuing up the road.
He left a confused group of gentlemen behind him.
Lord Holling was the first to speak, "Well if you gentleman will also excuse me I really must go speak to my grandmother." He bowed and departing causing a sigh of relief to emanate from the party.
Darcy turned to Bingley. "I think I'll go after Ash. Coming?"
Bingley nodded.
"Wait I'll come with you." Said Colonel Fitzwilliam.
The three men started to walk away the Colonel turned. "Coming Miles?"
"No, No you gentlemen..." Miles made little shooing movements with his hands.
Miles gave them a little wave as they swiftly walked in the direction of Ash's lodgings. Miles then turned and proceeded to walk, very fast, in the opposite direction.
Ash sat with his back against a wall, filing his nails. It was soothing. He looked around the dressing room. He was sitting between two very fine coats, hanging on either side of his head.
Ash couldn't think. All he could think was it wasn't fair! Things that weren't fair didn't happen to him, or if they did, he changed them. But he couldn't see how he could change this.
Ash bowed his head and distractedly ran his hands through his hair. When he looked up again, he was looking into the face of Miles.
"Can I have my nail file? I'd rather you didn't break it."
Ash glowered at him but handed over the file.
"I'm not going to even ask how you managed to get in to the house."
"The door seems to work for normal people Miles." Said Ash, wishing his friend hadn't worked out where he went.
Miles sat down opposite him and crossed his legs. "Really normal people?"
"Okay fine, if you must know I climbed up a drainpipe."
"You can still do that?"
"I'm not as old and weary as you."
Miles laughed. "Well, interesting news Teddy had."
"Oh thrilling news."
"Kind of makes a chap wish he well was a little quicker, huh?"
"If you don't shut up, I am going to have to hurt you."
"You think you can beat me?" smiled Miles.
"I know I can." Replied Ash with a smirk.
"Really?" smirked back Miles.
"Yes." Said Ash narrowing his eyes. He dodged the file that was casually tossed at his head, before trying to launch himself at Miles. Miles was too quick.
Ash rolled over onto his back and glared up into his friend's eyes.
"I told you that your habit of just sitting on your fingers, instead of doing something, would get you into trouble."
Ash made a guttural noise in this throat. Did Miles not think he knew this?
Miles sensed his friend was about to get up and pummel him so he placed a restraining foot on Ash's foot. "Not going to answer that?"
Ash opened his mouth, but was deterred from speaking by the door flying open and Miles valet, Robinson, blunderbuss in hand burst in.
"My lord there is a report of an intruder! A housebreaker."
"Yes Robinson, I have captured him as you can see."
Robinson stared down at Lord Ashbourne and only a very slight tremor of a snicker was allowed on his face.
Ash swiped at Miles' foot before getting up and glaring at the assembled company. He stalked to the door, swivelled on his heel, stalked over to Miles, grabbed the nail file out of his hand, and swivelled again before re-stalking out the room.
Miles gave Robinson a serious look.
Robinson gave a wooden look. "I apprehend a very notorious thief my lord."
"You would be correct Robinson."
Mary turned over the letter in her hands. Lucky it had turned up just after the war between her sisters broke out, otherwise she would be facing the Spanish inquisition over it.
She slid her finger under the seal and broke it. Biting her lip she cautiously opened it.
My Dear Mary.
Mary's jaw dropped. The Impertinence!
I am excessively glad you enjoyed my gift. How many times did you say you had read it? Twice?
A confused look passed across Mary's face. How on earth did he know?
Don't try to deny it, this is a case where 'The lady doth protest too much, methinks' *.
I wonder if you have heard that a rowing day is on the cards?
Mary dropped the letter on the bed and raced out of the room. Leaning over the banister she watched Jane standing in the hall sorting through the mail.
"Oh Lizzy! Here is an invitation from the Duchess of Hollingbury. Do we know the Duchess of Hollingbury?"
Mary watched as Lizzy walked into the hall.
"I believe we met her at the Soiree at Lord Upton's."
"Oh! Well she is inviting us to a rowing excursion!"
Mary walked back to her room and picked up Sir Christian's letter.
May I solicit your presence in my boat? We could continue our discussion about moral books.
Mary gave a most unladylike snort. As though she would trust her life to him!
"By the By. I managed to find a quite unexceptionable book that would even be acceptable to you. I found some quotes that were particularly apt."
Mary frowned. What kind of book would he find now?
I particularly like this quote:
'Thy neck is as a tower of ivory; thine eyes like the fishpools in Heshbon, by the gate of Bathrabbim: thy nose is as the tower of Lebanon which looketh toward Damascus.' *
Mary gasped, and then in the words of her father, read on.
'Behold, thou art fair, my beloved, yea, pleasant: also our bed is green.' *
Mary spluttered, who was he to refer to our bed. There was no mutual ownership of a bed! But the worst was yet to come.
'Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins' *
Yours very sincerely
Sir Christian Montgomery.
Mary had turned a rather interesting shade of purple; she looked down at her chest, looked back at the letter and scowled. Right! He was not getting away with this.
* Hamlet. Act iii. Sc. 2.
* The Song of Solomon. King James' Bible (7:4; 1:16; 7:3)
Ash stalked down the street. He didn't normally stalk, but this was an occasion where stalking was necessary. He had nowhere to go. He couldn't go back to Miles' and he couldn't go to his own lodgings because ten to one there was a detachment of the supportive squad there to well 'support' him.
"Lord Ashbourne! Lord Ashbourne."
Ash turned to the sound of the female voice - it was Miss Lucas.
"Oh Lord Ashbourne, it is very nice to see you again! I hoped you enjoyed the soiree?"
"Very much Miss Lucas. I hope you enjoyed it.'
'Oh yes."
Miss Lucas gave him a breathless smile, as Ash tried to work out how to run away without seeming rude.
Part Four.
Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter.
"Well you turned up at last Teddy."
"Yes Grandmamma. I'm sorry I didn't immediately follow my note, but I had many things to attend to."
"Yes so I perceive."
"Your grace, I think I might just - " Miles, who had decided a tête-à-tête with the Duchess, was the way to sort out Ash's problem, rose from his chair.
"Sit down Miles. I'm sure we can discuss this in front of you."
Annabelle looked confused. "Discuss what?"
"I think Grandmamma is referring to my engagement."
"You're engaged?!"
"Yes to Miss Bennet."
"Miss Bennet? Which Miss Bennet."
"Miss Catherine."
"Kitty!! Oh how wonderful Teddy."
Annabelle dragged Lord Holling to sit down with her.
"Oh Teddy! How wonderful!" she repeated ecstatically.
"Have you bought her a ring? A necklace? Lots of presents?"
Lord Holling blinked at all these questions, Miles frowned and the Duchess looked as though she had swallowed a lemon.
"It was only yesterday Belle! And there is still the problem of Mr Collins to be resolved."
"Oh pooh Mr Collins. Now let me tell you exactly what Kitty likes. So you can make sure you are definitely in her good graces!"
Lord Holling shifted uncomfortably and sent a silent plea of help to Miles.
Miles didn't receive it because he was too busy glaring at Annabelle. What was she about? She prided herself on seeing love? Didn't she know she was encouraging her cousin to marry the girl that unless Miles was very much mistaken, her brother was madly in love with? Teddy wasn't in love with Miss Catherine. He liked her very much, but he was simply saving her from Mr Collins. Belle should find out what her friend felt before presuming to promote the match.
Annabelle babbled on about lace and wedding clothes, completely unaware of the looks of disapprobation she was receiving from two quarters of the room.
"Well I think that is enough Annabelle." Snapped The Duchess, quite enraged.
"I hope you are doing the right thing Teddy." The Duchess continued.
Lord Holling looked bemused. "Yes of course I am doing the right thing."
"Of course he is! Kitty is wildly in love with him I daresay!" giggled Annabelle, supremely happy.
Miles almost choked on his stone cold tea.
Lord Holling turned to his cousin.
"You think she is in love with me?"
"Well how can she not be!"
Miles jaw dropped for a split second. Was this not Teddy? The man Belle had proclaimed a dead prosy bore? He ground his teeth together in anger. No, No I don't match make! My foot you don't match make Lady Annabelle.
"Well love doesn't have much to do with modern marriages." Retorted the Duchess.
"Well congratulations Teddy." Said Miles trying to defuse the tense situation. Searching for a neutral topic to converse upon he started to babble about recent arrivals in Brighton.
"....Well Mr Cartwright has returned to Brighton, and intends to hold some sort of carriage race! Oh yes and Miss Dew has returned from Weymouth. I believe you invited her on our rowing excursion your grace? I have been cajoled into escorting my mother and her party to the theatre tonight, Miss Dew has graciously accepted to come with us. Perhaps I shall see you at the theatre tonight your grace."
Miles could have kicked himself. He sounded like a complete idiot. But it had seemed to work.
The Duchess was smiling, very broadly. However Miles missed the side-glances she was throwing in Annabelle's direction.
Annabelle missed them too she was gaping at Miles. What was Miss Dew to him pray?
Who was this Miss Dew?
Chapter 28
Part One.
Jealousy is the only vice that gives no pleasure.
Annabelle nursed her grandmother's opera glasses in her lap. She had spent most of the first act, training them on the Upton's box. She had ascertained that the insipid blonde must be Miss Dew.
Miss Daphne Dew, daughter of Mr Albert Dew the Manchester king of Manchester. Of course he had sold all his interests in cotton mills and had become a fine gentleman. Which Annabelle particularly objected to, there was nothing wrong with being in trade, it was this absurd notion that once you made a lot of money you suddenly turned into a gentleman and suddenly found that you hated and looked down upon trade.
Through staring at her through the glasses, Annabelle had seen that Miss Dew had been strategically placed next to Miles. For all Lady Upton's professions that she wished Miss Smart to be her daughter in law, she would rather have Miss Dew and her £50 000. Especially since all Annabelle had heard about Miss Dew was that she was nice, sweet and highly biddable.
Annabelle plastered a smile across her face and applauded loudly as the curtain went down. Smiling at her grandmother she stood, dragged her errant youngest brother to his feet and exited the box.
"Belle, when I said I would come to the theatre with you, I thought I made it expressly clear I was not to be made to traipse around meeting people." Said Colonel Fitzwilliam crossly.
"We are not meeting people Ricky." Annabelle quickened her pace as she crossed the centre staircase. She continued speaking to her brother over her shoulder. "And anyway don't you wish to meet Miss Dew? I hear she is all the rage."
"Miss Dew?" muttered the Colonel wondering what had made his sister more insane than usual.
Annabelle had timed it perfectly. Lady Upton and her two guests were just leaving their box.
"Lady Upton." She smiled extending her hand.
"Lady Annabelle" replied Lady Upton tightly. She had no option but to introduce Lady Annabelle.
"Lady Annabelle may I present Mrs Dew and Miss Dew. Sarah, Daphne may I present Lady Annabelle Fitzwilliam. "
Lady Upton frowned when the Colonel arrived.
"Sarah, Daphne, may I present to you Colonel Fitzwilliam, Lady Annabelle's brother. Colonel Fitzwilliam, Mrs Dew and Miss Dew."
Annabelle watched with a small smile as Miss Dew bobbed up and down nervously, ringlets flying. She watched in curiosity as she whispered something into her mother's ear, which flustered the older lady.
"I don't know dear, I..." Mrs Dew broke off nervously, looking to Lady Upton, who had obviously over heard the question.
"Colonel Fitzwilliam is Lady Annabelle's second brother, Daphne. Her eldest brother Lord Ashbourne is not in attendance, well I haven't seen him."
"Oh." Smiled Miss Dew.
Annabelle's attention was however was diverted from Miss Dew and Ricky's subsequent explanation that his titled brother was unfortunately detained on regimental business. Miles had stuck his head out of the box and given a puzzled look at the groups.
"Miles."
Miles raised an eyebrow at the demure gloved hand held out to him, but he took it, offered a very gentlemanly leg in Annabelle's direction and smiled. Just what was she up to?
"Your very obedient servant." He said kissing her hand.
"I have been sent by my grandmother to fetch you." Annabelle kept the smile on her face, well it wasn't a lie, and Grandmamma had mentioned she wanted to speak to Miles. "Apparently you did not get a chance to finish your talk with her."
"Of course. Excuse me mother, Mrs Dew, Miss Dew," replied Miles before following Annabelle.
Annabelle saw the look on Miss Dew's face as she walked off; she deliberately put her arm through his.
"Okay Belle, what are you up to?"
"I'm not up to anything. I just didn't think insipid little seventeen year old, blonde china dolls were your style, that's all."
"Insipid....what?" said Miles stopping to turn to Annabelle.
"Miss Dew. Very intelligent, quite a step down from Miss Smart, at least she was closer to your age."
Miles frowned. "And you were in her company all of 10 seconds? How very perceptive of you."
"Oh don't be like that. It's obvious she is a title chasing little nobody."
Miles tried to force a smile on his face as he watched passers-by's look at Annabelle and him in curiosity.
"I'm not going to argue with you."
"No because you know I'm right. You really shouldn't let your mother talk you into giving countenance to such creatures."
Annabelle didn't quite know why she was being so hard on Miss Dew, perhaps it was because she looked perfect and watching her for an entire act, she did seem to act perfectly. The only thing Annabelle could fault her on was her timidity and stupidity. She didn't really seem like the type to be a fortune hunter, but she was too stupid not to make sure she didn't give that impression. But it irked her to think Miles could possibly prefer such an insipid immature looking girl.
"Miss Dew is a very shy, nice young lady. You don't judge Georgiana out of hand, so why judge Miss Dew. And I'm not going to argue with you in such a public place."
Annabelle inwardly cursed at the logical nature of Miles argument but outwardly she wasn't giving an inch.
"If you say so." She breezed airily. "Now come in and talk to my grandmother. I'm sure she wants to boast about the match between Kitty and Teddy. I mean I can't even take credit for that match."
Annabelle was hoping her conversation was soothing Miles anger, she didn't realise she was flaming it.
Mary was also peering at the boxes and the stalls. However she didn't have glasses. Mrs Bennet had those and she was appraising all the rich boxes. "Oh you will be up there one day girls!" she tittered.
Jane and Lizzy bid her to be silent, but Mary and Kitty just looked at the audience.
"I say Mary, who is that man gesturing at you?"
"What?" said Mary to her younger sister, much alarmed.
"That man, down there, he is either gesturing at you or me, and I hope it is you because I feel I already have too many men paying me attention. "
Mary looked down at where Kitty was subtly pointing and suddenly had a great desire to look at the ceiling.
"Maaarrrry! He is kissing his hand to you!"
"Shut up Kitty," hissed Mary at her younger sister.
"All right, don't be angry at me. I'm not the one making romantic gestures at you."
Mary gave Sir Christian the most vicious of her stares, before returning to stare at the curtains of the box.
Why had she written back to him? Oh Why? It was the mention of the b word that had done it, and rather over done it she felt. She had written a long dissection of his character to him, he had replied asking what she had against the bible. She had written a short note in a clipped tone about his irresponsible and stirring nature, he had replied and it had seemed rude not to reply to that.
Mary put her hand to her head. Trying to come to terms with the fact that she, Mary Bennet, known for her morality and prudence had written over 10 letters to a notorious rake. They were hardly romantic letters, well hers had been hardly romantic, his were rather harder to categorise. Then a thought struck her - only engaged people wrote letters to the opposite sex.
Mary suddenly felt rather ill.
Colonel Fitzwilliam had hurriedly detached himself from Lady Upton's grasp and walked partway back to the box, when he realised that Annabelle had gone that direction. Hesitating he turned to find someone else to visit and ran into Anne.
"Anne."
"Ricky!"
"At last someone sane!"
"What ever do you mean?" replied Anne confused.
"Are you here with your mother?'
"Yes."
"May I escort you back to your box?"
"Of course, anything Ricky. But what do you mean; at last someone sane?"
"Oh my sister. Drags me out of my box, all the way along to the Upton's box. Then to the man she said was the most boring, horrid, puppyish man in existence. "Oh Miiiillllleeesssss""
Anne laughed as the Colonel mimicked his sisters' coquettish tone.
"Then instead of glaring her into submission it's all "Your obedient ser -vant" BAH!"
"You mimic very well Ricky."
"And off he goes with my sister like a little lamb."
There was a silence before both spoke at once.
"Like a lamb to the slaughter you mean."
Anne smiled at the Colonel and laughed.
"I'm glad I found you Anne."
"I'm glad you found me too."
"Annabelle run along, like a good girl."
Annabelle glared at her grandmother and flounced out of the box.
"Now Miles sit down, what was it you wished to talk to me about?"
"Teddy and Miss Catherine Bennet - "
The Duchess held up her hand. "No need for you to say another word. I understand perfectly. You may leave it in my hands."
Miles blinked. "Your grace, I don't think interfering is going to - "
"Who said anything about interfering!" exclaimed the Duchess.
"Well perhaps not interfering, but you already have many problems on your hands..."
Miles watched the boxes on the lowest tier, as Annabelle burst in on the Bennets.
The Duchess leant forward very confidentially. "You know Miles you could always take that particular problem off my hands."
Miles rolled his eyes. "Now I see where she gets it from."
"It was only a suggestion Miles. I never match make. "
Miles just nodded, with an 'of course you don't' look on his face.
Part Two.
I plan to accumulate as many shoes as Imelda Marcos while cultivating an aura of virtue exceeding that of Mother Theresa ~. Seen in a. signature file
Lizzy pulled her cloak about her and tried to breathe. It was excessively hard being the third person on a two-person seat.
"Lizzy stop squirming girl." Snapped Mrs Bennet, sandwiched between her two eldest daughters.
"Mary are you quite all right?" asked Jane with concern.
"Yes, Yes. I'm fine." Replied Mary weakly.
Lizzy stared out the window. She hadn't seen Darcy since the party. He had sent a courteous letter to the house stating he found himself much tied up at present and would be around as soon as possible, but Lizzy didn't believe that.
Why hadn't she just spoken to him? Told him her fears. Spoken rationally? She wasn't going to say it was all her fault, because it wasn't, but it wasn't completely his fault either. Lizzy sighed.
She would see him tomorrow though. He had to come rowing, surely.
Jane was looking out the other window thinking the exact same thing. Becoming embroiled in a fight between her sister and her sister's fiancée was not what she wanted, because loyalty could only be stretched so far, and Jane was not sure how far Charles' loyalty would stretch.
Kitty was glad Annabelle had come to their box between acts. It had given them a chance to clear the air. Annabelle however had been all happiness about Kitty's engagement to Lord Holling, not that they had spoken about that for long, as Annabelle couldn't stop talking about Miss Dew. Kitty had a feeling that Annabelle didn't think much of Miss Dew, Kitty had a suspicion she knew why that was, but Annabelle wasn't admitting to it.
Kitty was not sure whether she was looking forward to rowing, or not. Mr Collins was going to be going and so was Lord Holling. This created a problem, her father had yet to tell Mr Collins his suit had been rejected. In fact Kitty had not seen her father speak a single word since Lord Holling had asked for Kitty's hand, the idea that his daughter could become a Duchess had temporarily left him bereft of speech.
So did she pretend to be engaged to Mr Collins or did she pretend to be engaged to Lord Holling, by this stage Kitty really felt as though she was just an actress on a stage speaking lines. Kitty would like to think she was acting in a drama, but she had a feeling that she was acting in a tragedy. Sometimes when she really thought about it, she realised she wasn't in a drama or a tragedy; she was participating in a real life farce.
Kitty sighed and stared out the window.
Lydia was sulking. She didn't get to go to the theatre. Mrs Forster had invited her out, and her mother had insisted she kept the engagement. Lydia was quite sick of the officers, well the plain ordinary officers, why didn't she meet any titled officers?
Lydia punched the pillow and curled up on her bed. Mr Collins had not attended the theatre either, thus it was not safe to venture out of the room. Tomorrow, she had been invited to attend a picnic with her particular friends, just when everyone else was to go boating with important people. This time Lizzy and Jane had insisted that Lydia keep her prior engagement.
'They'll be sorry one day' sulked Lydia.
Lord Holling stared at his ceiling. It was a nice ceiling. It had 117 little flowered plaster-y things around the borders. It was a nice shade of off-white, and it was thrilling to watch.
Well, Lord Holling had told his grandmother he was sorry to cry off from the theatre but he had something more important to attend to. Ceiling-maintenance was very serious in his opinion. Ceilings were what stopped you being crushed to death at night.
Lord Holling let out a sigh; he had lost count of thread-like cracks in the paint, for what seemed like the millionth time. Why hadn't he gone to the theatre?
He didn't feel like playing attentive fiancée, and he wasn't sure why. He didn't love Kitty per se, but he knew that when he proposed, so why now would he be thinking about love? Now, with the luxury of reflection and hindsight, he could pinpoint the exact moment when something odd had started to happen in his mind. It was when Darcy and the rest of them had acted very strange, when he told them about his engagement.
Now Lord Holling was no academic, but with his limited skills of deduction, he had managed to work out the strangeness was due to Ash. The only reason he could think of was that Ash disapproved. Why he would disapprove?
Lord Holling shook his head and gave up trying to grapple with reasoning too complex for him to grasp. He went back to counting paint cracks.
Chapter 29, Part Three
Water, water, everywhere, Nor any drop to drink ~ Samuel Taylor Coleridge. (1772-1834)
Annabelle smiled courteously at the young girl opposite her; all the while she was cursing her grandmother's travel arrangements. Sitting in a carriage with Miss Dew, Miss Smart and Miss Grantley was not her idea of fun. Obviously her grandmamma was punishing her for being such a trial.
"Yes My dear Daffy, you should just see London when it is lit up!" cooed Miss Smart.
"You have not been to London?" inquired Annabelle politely.
Miss Grantley distracted Miss Dew and Annabelle bristled, she didn't like not being answered, especially as this was the 3rd or 4th time Miss Dew had simply not answered a direct question. And it was about the 100th time she had rejected an offer of friendship; Annabelle had smiled; Miss Dew had looked the other way. Annabelle had made a vague comment about the pleasantness about the weather and had been ignored.
Annabelle had tried to be objective about Miss Dew, but it was impossible. She was a young, pert little nobody, who seemed most at home in the catty world of the Miss Smart's and Grantley's.
Annabelle suffered through an interminable carriage ride, her opinion of the ladies sinking further still. They could think of nothing but men and dresses. Subjects Annabelle was an expert on, but did they ask her opinion? No they did not. It was insufferably hot and stuffy in the carriage, but Miss Dew, in perhaps the first coherent sentence she had uttered, forbade Annabelle from opening the window, in case they should catch chill.
By the time the carriage stopped, Annabelle was ready to tear the women limb from limb. However she could not even get out of the carriage first, even though she was closest to the door, and in deference to rank (which Annabelle only reverted to on extreme provocation) she should be the first handed out. Instead Miss Dew practically launched herself into Miles' waiting arms, then Miss Grantley and Miss Smart made their way out of the carriage. Annabelle finally stooped to exit, and found that no one was waiting to hand her out Miles had wandered off with Miss Dew.
It was the last straw.
Lizzy watched as the servants struggled with various tables, trying to set up and appropriate alfresco luncheon. She felt a presence behind her and she nervously turned.
Darcy shifted his weight from one foot to the other, not exactly sure how he should begin the conversation.
"Do you regret asking me to marry you?"
Darcy was taken back by the candid question, and confusion flooded into his face.
"Do I regret...No of course I don't regret asking you to marry me. I love you Elizabeth."
Darcy took both her hands in his and raised them to his lips. 'Don't ever accuse me of not loving you Elizabeth."
Lizzy blushed. "If I were you I'd be regretting it."
"Why?"
"My family! Everything! We knew each other for such a relatively short time before our engagement! Society!"
"I have something to solve all those problems Elizabeth."
Lizzy smiled up at him. "Really?"
"Yes, I only need an answer to one question."
"Go on."
"Do you love me?"
"How could you ask me such a thing? Of course I love you!"
"Then nothing else should stand in our way. Indeed I won't let it stand in our way!"
Darcy paused before continuing. "I don't say it will not be difficult...." Darcy paused again assuming a teasing tone. "What with you having to adjust to being mistress of such a grand estate."
Lizzy pulled a hand free to playfully slap his shoulder. Darcy laughed before continuing. "And I shall have to get used to sharing everything with a beautiful woman."
"Who might that beautiful woman be?" asked Lizzy coyly.
"Hmmm well she is blonde.....no, no I tell a lie she has brown hair."
Lizzy laughed. She was happy that their argument was forgotten, but she sensed that their underlying problems had not been solved, yet it was implicitly understood they would face them together.
A similar scene was occurring further up the bank between Jane and Bingley.
"Jane, I hope I can confide in you."
"You can always confide in me." Replied Jane, wondering whether she should be worried at Bingley agitated demeanour.
"I know others, and I think you too, think that I am too kindly, and do not profess my opinions, that I simply just parrot others. However I do have my own opinions, I just don't..."
Jane smiled. "You don't want to hurt others?"
Bingley looked up and smiled back. "Yes."
"I confess I am the same. Perhaps together we can stand up for ourselves? I know that I am having trouble telling my mother her idea of a wedding is not my idea of a wedding."
Bingley kissed Jane's hand. Jane covered his hand with her own and looked over at her mother, animatedly talking to Lady Lucas. "At least I assume pink silk draperies at our wedding breakfast is not your style."
Bingley's jaw dropped. "A Pink Tent?"
"With Pink Champagne."
"Let's elope!"
"What is Belle doing??" exclaimed the Duchess, shaking her head at the exploits of her granddaughter.
"I have no idea Cassie." Replied Kitty watching as Belle seemed to be intentionally walking around with women she had always said she despised.
The Duchess shrugged and turned to Kitty. "Well I hear I am to congratulate you."
Kitty briefly looked down before looking directly at the Duchess. "Yes you are. Your grandson has made me a most flattering offer."
"Yes but is it the right grandson Kitty?" asked The Duchess frankly.
"Well he's the only one who has asked me, and it's him or Mr Collins."
"And those are your only choices?"
Kitty bit her lip. "I don't know what to do Cassie. I really don't. I can't talk to any of my sisters, Lizzy especially, she practically bit my head off when she realised what I had done."
"Did you say yes?"
"My mother answered for me, and there was no chance to contradict it, and I don't even know if I should."
The Duchess put her arm around Kitty's waist and gave her a squeeze. "What ever you do, follow your heart."
Kitty gave a weak smile; inwardly she was thinking that that was easier said than done.
Annabelle was inwardly seething. Why did Miles take Miss Dew's arm? Why did he seem so interested in what she was saying? The group had separated; Miss Smart and Miss Grantley falling behind and Annabelle determined not to be separated from Miss Dew and Miles.
"Oh Lord Upton, I liked your coat last night, puce is a very nice colour don't you think." Smiled Miss Dew naively.
"Puce? My dear, that was not puce. No respectable person would be seen in puce." Replied Annabelle cutting off Miles' answer.
Miss Dew flushed, looking to Miles for rescue.
"Well puce is one of those colours that is hard to distinguish, and as for being seen in it, it all depends on the person."
"I've never been rowing before, shall it be quiet safe?"
"Never been rowing!" exclaimed Annabelle in disdainful surprise.
Miles shot her a look. 'Have you been rowing before Lady Annabelle?"
Annabelle frowned at the formality, but was more upset that she had to own she had never been rowing before in her life.
"Then it will be a novel experience for both of you," countered Miles, wondering what had made Annabelle so peevish.
"You have been rowing before Lord Upton?" asked Miss Dew looking up at Miles with open eyes.
"Yes at University and on the Thames."
"How dashing! I'm never allowed to do anything dashing. The curse of my sex I fear." Replied Miss Dew.
"Really, it is only a curse if you let it be Miss Dew. I think only the weakest of females let their sex stand in their way."
For the second time Miss Dew flushed, and Miles taking pity on her tried to draw her away from Annabelle.
Annabelle noticed the action and increased her pace to keep up.
"Well Lady Annabelle, I fear in my opinion it is the weakest of females, who show themselves to be nothing more than catty spite," Stated Miles.
Annabelle stopped dead allowing Miles to whisk Miss Dew away.
"Lady Annabelle, you have been left behind." Giggled Miss Grantley.
"As have both of you." Replied Annabelle tensely to the two ladies.
"I think Miss Dew is more intelligent than we gave her credit for." Replied Miss Smart tersely.
Annabelle noticed the unpleasant way the two women were looking at Miss Dew and smiled.
"Really?"
"Oh yes. My mama said I should watch out for Miss Dew, for she is only a tradesman's daughter, and would stoop to the lowest arts to attract my fiancé."
"Has Lord Upton offered for you!" exclaimed Annabelle aghast.
"Well not yet, but it has practically been settled! If it wasn't for her." The three women watched the object of their universal dislike, trip along side of Miles. Annabelle had never felt so in charity with them.
Chapter 29, Part Four
Wickham finished talking to the boatman and then turned to the party. It had been decided that only the young people should go out in the boats, while the chaperones would watch from the shore.
Clapping his hands to gain the attention of the party, he directed them towards the boats.
"While our luncheon is prepared I suggest we take a turn about the water!"
Wickham obtained himself a boat, and turned to hand Miss Smart into it.
"Thank you Captain Wickham."
"My pleasure. Now Miss Grantley."
After handing Miss Grantley into the boat he turned to see Annabelle smiling saucily at him.
"Captain Wickham!"
"Lady Annabelle." He clumsily kissed her hand as he tried to keep the boat close to the pier.
"May I hand you into the boat?"
"With pleasure." Replied Annabelle.
Wickham gave a small laugh before sliding a hand around her waist to swing her into the boat.
"Now ladies, I must leave you here while I attend to the other boats, you mustn't be afraid."
"Afraid of a little water!" exclaimed Annabelle. "We are not so paltry as that!"
Wickham strode up the pier and stood by the Duchess.
"Is everything going to plan your grace?"
The Duchess frowned.
Darcy, who immediately pushed off, ensuring their privacy, was handing Lizzy into a boat. Bingley took his friend's lead and was soon upon the lake alone with Jane.
Anne and Colonel Fitzwilliam were soon spinning around out of control some way from the pier laughing noisily.
Mary was standing on the pier trying to make a decision, which boat should she go in??? No one was asking her to accompany him or her, which made Mary sink. Why didn't anyone ask her to come in their boat? She envied Jane and Lizzy for their good fortune.
Suddenly she felt an arm around her waist. She was pinned to somebody as she was hustled into a boat. Sliding around the seat of the boat, she struggled to right herself, once she had she found herself opposite Sir Christian.
"Sir turn this boat around immediately! Take me back to the pier, I have no desire to boat with you."
"No desire to boat with me? Can boat be used as a verb? If not, you very charmingly mutilate the English language."
"Mutilate the English language!"
"The language of Shakespeare." Replied Sir Christian dreamily, with a smirk on his face.
"Do not speak to me of Shakespeare, I doubt you have ever read one! You only read bawdy tales."
"But Shakespeare is the bawdiest writer of all, shall I quote to you about maidenheads."
"Get out of this boat immediately!" shrieked Mary outraged.
"I would, however I could not abandon you to row back all alone. Though the image of you rowing is quite intriguing."
"Well I never!"
"Never rowed? Shocking, I imagine you proficient in anything Mary."
"Don't you dare call me Mary!"
"What else would you like me to call you?"
"Just Miss Bennet is fine."
"Okay, 'Just Miss Bennet is fine', how do you like the weather today?"
Wickham noticed the abduction of Mary and moved to stop Sir Christian casting off, but was held back by the Duchess.
"Don't George. Might as well let one couple enjoy themselves."
"A couple!? He practically abducted her."
"Women like being abducted, especially women like Mary Bennet."
"But he is a rake!"
"So are you!"
"I wouldn't abduct Mary Bennet!"
"That shows your lack of taste." Counted the Duchess smiling.
Kitty was placed in a quandary. Did she get into the boat with Lord Holling, or Mr Collins boat? On the surface this would seem a very silly quandary, any sensible person would know the answer. However there were other circumstances shaping the quandary. Lord Holling's boat held Ash and Lord Douglas, while Mr Collins' boat held Lydia (who had successfully sobbed loud enough to be allowed to come) and Mr Yeates.
Mr Yeates was the older gentleman who had taken quite a shine to Lydia, not that she noticed he was alive. He had always been very polite to Kitty, and his politeness and attention almost cancelled out the Mr Collins factor.
However the other boat held Ash and Lord Holling. A dangerous combination.
With much reluctance Kitty took the podgy hand of Mr Collins and stepped into his boat.
"Stupid girl." Muttered The Duchess under her breathe, before turning back to be hostess to the range of people still left on the shore.
Ash pushed off his boat with vehemence, much to the surprise of his companies.
"Hey Ash aren't you going to wait for Miles?" asked Lord Douglas grabbing onto the sides of the wildly rocking boat.
"He can find his own boat." Replied Ash, taking up the oars.
Lord Douglas shot a look of confusion at his brother, who didn't notice the look, because he was transfixed by Ash. Lord Holling swallowed a lump that had just formed in his throat. He just had the answer to his questions of last night.
Miles almost swore when he realised there was only one boat left. He really didn't want to put himself or Miss Dew in that boat, but there was nothing for it. He handed Miss Dew into the boat, placing her into the seat next to Annabelle with misgiving, before occupying the middle seat with Wickham.
"Oh this is by far the fullest boat!" exclaimed Miss Dew nervously clinging to the side, as Wickham and Miles rowed away from the shore.
"Really, how perceptive of you." Smiled Annabelle.
Miles ground his teeth and tried to divert his anger into his rowing. Why was Belle being so callous to such a nice, naïve little thing like Miss Dew?
"Oh well it is!" replied Miss Dew shifting in her seat, wishing she could sit with nice Miss Smart and Grantley at the opposite end of the boat.
Mary resolutely kept her head turned away from her boating companion; her lips were firmly pressed together as she repeated to herself that she would not talk to this man. However she noted with some alarm that their boat was drifting considerably away from the rest of the boats.
In fact Sir Christian appeared to be rowing in quite the opposite direction.
"Turn this boat around! Take me back to shore!"
"Of course."
Mary turned her head sharply at this quick acquiesce to her demands. Sir Christian grinned as he brought the boat into shore, just the opposite shore.
"Not this shore!" exclaimed Mary.
"You didn't specify! You said take me back to shore, and I have fulfilled your request. "
"You sir are a ...... a........words fail me!"
"I often have that effect on women."
"You Scoundrel."
"They often call me that as well." Smiled Sir Christian.
Mary descended into silence, trying to think of something to say that could not be twisted.
"Struck Dumb Mary?"
"I have asked you not to call me that. You have no right to call me that."
"I know. It's a great pity that I don't have that right." Replied Sir Christian mysteriously.
Mary looked the other way, and pretended to be much engaged by some floating plants.
"Mary, Marry me."
Mary looked up alarmed, she was more alarmed to see the most sincere expression on Sir Christian's face.
Inwardly Mary smiled. How much she would enjoy turning him down, he needed to be taken down a peg or two and the fact that she would be the one to do it. Fancy it, that he should think that she, the high principles Mary Bennet, would ever think about him, the insincere, rakish Sir Christian.
She opened her mouth, forming a severe set down in her mind.
"Yes."
Mary's brain goggled. That was not quite what she had meant to say. She had meant to say No, in a clear resounding voice. But it had not quite come out like that. She opened her mouth to rectify the situation.
"I'd love to."
Mary blinked. That wasn't quite right either.
Mary's eyes widened as Sir Christian let the oars rest in the rowlocks. He seemed to be intended to lean closer to her. Mary shrunk back, however the combination of both their movements, sent the boat into a spin.
Sir Christian cursed as he slipped in his seat, grabbing the oars; he managed to stop the boat's rapid movement.
Mary gave a sigh of relief glad that providence had given her a little more time to correct the mistaken notion Sir Christian was under.
"Sir Christian...." She started nervously.
Sir Christian balancing himself placed two hands on the wooden seat on either side of Mary and leaned forward a wicked look on his face.
"I think you can drop the sir."
Mary froze. "No I mean...Sir Christian I - "
Mary got no further, finding herself being rather ruthlessly kissed.
No No No No No her mind screamed.......oooh...no....no...hmmmm Yes..
The staid, prudish and morally up-standing Mary Bennet, threw her arms around Sir Christian's neck and kissed back.
Chapter Thirty, Part One
The trouble with a kitten is that Eventually it becomes a Cat ~. Ogden Nash.
Kitty frowned at her sister. Lydia was in a good humour, having been allowed to come along, much to her sister's disgust.
"I'm surprised you didn't want me to come along Kitty! This party is so dull! I could easily liven it up."
"I beg you will not Lydia!"
"You beg I will not!" mimicked Lydia. "Lord I'm so bored!"
Lydia gave a snicker as she watched Mr Collins struggle with the oars.
"Are you sure you would not like me to row?" inquired Mr Yeates, lounging back on his seat.
"Oh no, most noble sir, I shall row!" replied Mr Collins huffing and puffing.
Mr Yeates raised a satirical eye and continued his gaze upon Lydia.
Kitty did not understand why he should admire Lydia; she certainly paid no attention to him.
"Why were you invited to this boating party Mr - - " said Lydia struggling with his name.
"Yeates?" he replied affably.
"Yes, Mr Yeates. I was invited because my sisters are to become Mrs Darcy and Mrs Bingley. And Kitty here is to become the ..."
Alarmed Kitty sat up and stared at Lydia willing her not to continue but Lydia was in fact cut off by Mr Collins.
"The wife of myself. My happy little dandelion has agreed to become my caro sposo and we will produce calla lilies together."
Mr Yeates forehead knit together at this speech, but being a gentleman he just nodded, all the while wondering how to rescue the two young ladies from such a lunatic.
"Tell Kitty all about your estate and your money Mr Yeates." Crowed Lydia.
Mr Yeates hid a smile. Lydia Bennet had not known he existed until she had seen him get out of his carriage and recognised him as one of those background figures who normally hung around her.
"Miss Bennet, I think you have been misled, I have no money or an estate. I'm a poor penniless artist, forced to draw for my living."
Lydia stared at him. "But you dress so well?"
"Hand me downs from grateful patrons who are happy that I made their imperfections seem nothing on paper."
Lydia's mouth formed a wide 'O'.
Kitty stared past the sweating Mr Collins, at Mr Yeates - a penniless artist??!! He caught her looking at him and gave her a surreptitious wink. Kitty swallowed her laughter.
"How do you afford all those balls!" said Lydia naively. "But you are handsome!"
"Thank you. Do handsomeness and money go hand in hand with you Miss Bennet?"
"Of course. Aren't all good-looking men rich? All officers are dashing and they are all rich."
"Really Miss Bennet? Many of them are not rich, well in my sense of the word, I don't know about yours."
"But Lieutenant Bobbing, told me he is quite rich and that all officers are rich. Thus they would make good husbands, especially to elope with." Said Lydia airily.
"Cousin Lydia, please remember where you are. " exclaimed Mr Collins.
"Yes Miss Lydia remember that you are in a boat." Said Mr Yeates seriously.
Lydia shot him a funny glance, while her sister was practically doubled up with laughter at her end of the boat.
"Ash can I talk to you?" said Lord Holling tentatively.
"Of course you can talk to me Teddy. You can always talk to me. I'm always here for you." Replied Ash stroking viciously.
"I can see why you were a champion rower at Cambridge Ash." Observed Lord Douglas clinging to the side of the boat. "However I do not think this boat was made to go at these speeds"
"Ash...."
"What is it Teddy?" Snapped Ash.
"It's about Miss Bennet."
Lord Douglas groaned and hit his head against the side of the boat, his brother decided to bring that up now, while there were in a boat, in the middle of a body of water?
"Which Miss Bennet?"
"Kitty."
"Kitty is it?" sneered Ash.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Tell you what?"
"You know what!"
"No I don't' know what!"
"Well I'm not going to voice it, if you haven't voiced it."
"Why not!"
"Damn it its not for another man to say such a thing. I may be wrong. But I'm not am I?"
"I have no idea if you are wrong or not, and I do not see the problem with you voicing opinions, even if they might not be my own."
Lord Holling opened his mouth to reply but was cut off by Lord Douglas.
"Okay if you too are quite finished playing confusing usage of the English language designed to make listeners go insane while trying to work out what the hell the players are saying, can I get a word in edgewise."
"I'm not stopping you." Replied Ash, pulling even stronger on the oars.
"Right, well as I was saying. Its as plain as the nose on your face...you are in love with - "
Lord Douglas ducked as an oar swung over his head.
"I'm in love with who?" asked Ash icily.
"Yourself. You are in love with yourself. Obvious...who else would you be in love with?" Replied Lord Douglas quickly.
Anne spun her parasol lazily above her head. She watched the other boats glide around the water.
Colonel Fitzwilliam was sweating away trying to steer the boat accurately.
"Damn" he exclaimed, as one of the rowlocks became loose throwing off his stroke.
"Sir! Please do not swear in front of me!" exclaimed Anne in a haughty fashion.
"Oh! I do beg you pardon Anne, I didn't think, please accept my humblest apologies." Replied Colonel Fitzwilliam hurriedly while trying to secure the rowlock.
"Silly boy!" laughed Anne.
Colonel Fitzwilliam looked up, and saw Anne laughing at him and grimaced.
"Oh thank you very much Anne. Just tease away."
"I don't need your permission to tease you. I shall tease where I like."
"Yes Anne, and where precisely do you like? Lord Upton perchance."
Anne turned her head away hiding a smile. "I do like Miles I confess. You have discovered my secret. What shall you do now?"
Colonel Fitzwilliam had dropped the oars, looking down at his feet he sighed. She liked Miles.
"But then again, I like Ash and I like Darcy and I like Bingley, and I like Teddy and I like Lord Douglas, and I like you. So really I don't think it's a great honour for poor Miles to be liked by me."
Colonel Fitzwilliam bit his lip to stop the volley of abuse that was hovering on his lips.
"Anne you are a wretch."
"Am I a wretch? Just the other day you were declaring me the only sane female of your acquaintance!"
"I was mistaken."
"Really? Well then." Replied Anne flippantly. "Now row slave boy row."
"Slave Boy?"
"Yes I'm delusional, I think I'm Cleopatra on the Nile, now I'm Queen of all Egypt so row Slave boy."
Colonel Fitzwilliam shook his head before he picked up the oars and recommenced rowing.
It excessively hard to flirt at a back, but Annabelle was succeeding admirably, the problem was she could not see the effect it was having on the object of her flirtation or the reason behind her flirtation.
Wickham looked at Miles out of the corner of his eye, Miles didn't look too happy, in fact Miles was starting to resemble an overripe tomato.
"Wickham, we have not seen much of you around lately. I do hope you visit dear Grandmama soon, we both miss your enlivening conversation."
"Perhaps Captain Wickham has many duties to perform Lady Annabelle, and cannot spare time for visiting. For men have many duties that we women can know nothing about." Simpered Miss Dew.
"Men do not know the meaning of the word duty, Miss Dew. Men think of nothing but their own pleasure. Which is why I am very surprised that Wickham has not called upon us recently."
Miss Dew smiled weakly and Annabelle smiled triumphantly.
"Do not discuss Wickham's motives without applying to him first, ladies." Said Miles curtly.
"Wickham will not own up to his true motives, Lord Upton .It would be improper."
"Only if his motives were improper, Lady Annabelle" said Miss Dew. "And I cannot think that his motives would be."
Wickham opened his mouth to protest that he did not like people speculating over his motives, but he was beaten to it.
"Well Wickham has become practically part of my family Miss Dew, to own up to any sorts of motives extending beyond family obligation would be improper. It would be seen as encroaching on the ease and familiarity upon which we currently stand, and Wickham as a gentleman would not do so for the world."
"Is Captain Wickham the only young man of your acquaintance, not strictly from family, who you are upon terms of ease and familiarity?"
"Of course Miss Dew. To be free and easy with ones favours would lessen the distinction conferred upon those one bestows the honour of ease and familiarity."
Miss Dew tried to smile as she attempted to grasp this elusive speech. One member of the boat did grasp the meaning, all too clear, and grasped his oars harder.
"Miles!" yelped Wickham, as the boat started to circle as a result of the differing stroke strength of either side of the boat.
"Darcy what are you doing!" almost shrieked Lizzy clutching at the sides of the boat, as it ploughed into the reeds clumped around the banks of the river.
"Would you believe...it is excessively hard to steer when one is staring at a beautiful woman?"
"No!" laughed Lizzy.
"Well I will admit to you that rowing is not my forte. I prefer fencing and swimming."
"Remind me never to ride in a carriage tooled by you sir!"
"A carriage?"
"If you can't control a boat how can you control a team of horses!!?"
"A team of horses, rational thinking creatures, is completely different to ungovernable water my dear madam."
"My dear madam?"
"Yes my dear madam."
"I don't think I like that phrase sir, it makes me sound like an old maidenly aunt, or a governess."
"Now if you were my governess...."
"If I was your maiden aunt."
"Elizabeth! Please! I do not want to think such thoughts!"
Lizzy laughed and turned her head. "Well sir I can tell you that you are succeeding admirably in steering, if our companions are anything to go by! That boat over there seems to have lost its occupants, and Lord Ashbourne's boat seems out of control, so does Lord Upton's, and the least said about Mr Collins the better!"
Darcy laughed, and flung down the oars in disgust. "Can I give up?"
"Certainly sir, as long as you promise to entertain me."
"Entertain you? Oh dear, I better row then."
Part Two.
Tender is the ghost/ the ghost I love the most/Hiding from the sun/waiting for the night to come/Tender is my heart/It's screwing up my life/Lord, I need to find/Someone who can heal my mind ~ Tender by Blur.
The boat that Lizzy thought had lost its occupants, had not in fact lost its occupations, its occupants were just not sitting up.
"Sir Christian please.....................No No that was not a please continue! it was a please desist..................................I'm warning you!"
Sir Christian's yelp echoed around the lake. He sat up abruptly holding the back of his head.
"Was that really necessary?"
Straightening her dress, Mary sat up and glared at him. "I think it was very necessary."
"But we're engaged!"
"We are not engaged!"
"Yes we are! You said Yes! TWICE!"
"It was a mistake!"
"Twice? You said the wrong thing twice?"
"Yes, anyone could do it."
"No. No one can make the same mistake twice in a row, especially over a marriage."
"It's very easy to sir."
"Well I demand an explanation! You have led me on, under false pretences, my lips are no longer virgin, I gave them to you under the express understanding that we were to be married. I feel violated!"
Mary's jaw dropped. "You conscienceless cad! You're lips weren't ..." Mary dropped her voice dramatically "virgin!" Mary surreptitiously looked around before continuing at her normal pitch "I bet you have kissed scores of girls."
"Not girls I thought I was going to marry!"
"I suppose you kiss girls differently if you don't think you are going to be wedded to them!" retorted Mary sarcastically.
"Of course I do. One does everything differently with a girl one doesn't intend to marry."
"Well I'm sure you have a lot of practice at that! And you will get a lot more of it."
"With you?"
"Not with me! You are returning me to shore and then you are going to never speak or contact me again!"
Sir Christian sighed and picked up the discarded oars. Mary shifted in her seat.
"One thing sir."
"Anything'Just Miss Bennet is fine' " smiled Sir Christian.
"How exactly do you distinguish between kissing girls you aren't going to marry and those you are, I mean a kiss is simply a kiss is it not?"
Sir Christian dropped the oars. "My dear Mary. This is how one kisses a girl one isn't going to marry."
Kitty sighed, as the boat drifted in a circle for the thirtieth time, she really was about to get sea-sick.
"Mr Collins are you sure you are in no need of assistance?" Mr Yeates inquired as the boat perilously dipped to one side.
"No I am in no need of assistance Mr Yeates, I am quite capable of rowing a boat. Lady Catherine says I am eminently suitable for this type of exertion."
"Really?" replied Mr Yeates, not sure whether he was happy with the fact that Miss Lydia had practically slid into his lap. Not that Lydia had machinated this, at least this time she hadn't, she was just responding to gravity.
Kitty, lucky she did not have to share a seat with anyone, managed to keep her countenance, albeit, only just. It was hard to look dignified when one was in danger of falling out of a boat.
"So Mr Yeates...." Began Kitty, only to be cut off by Mr Collins.
"Look my dear gladiolus, look at those reeds, would they not be perfect at our wedding?"
"No Mr Collins, I am afraid they wouldn't as I am not going to marry you." Said Kitty with a tight quality to her voice.
"No! Kitty is going to be a D-" giggled Lydia before Mr Yeates accidentally elbowed her in the side.
"Oh a thousand apologies."
"You elbowed me in the side!" shrieked Lydia. Men did not elbow her they fawned all over her.
Mr Yeates tried to look repentant and failed. He had tried to attract her attention fawning, and hadn't received it, however elbowing her in the side seemed to have elicited her attention.
Kitty gave Mr Yeates a happy smile, his intervention had saved her some pain.
Lydia glared at Mr Yeates. Men didn't elbow her.
"How old are you anyway!"
"Lydia!"
Lydia laughed at her sister, when did Kitty get so mortified about things.
"I'm thirty."
"Really! You look much older than that!"
"Lydia!!" Even Kitty was noticing how she was transforming into her older sisters.
"No no Miss Bennet, your sister is right. I am a little tanned by the Indian sun."
"You were in India as a penniless artist?" said Lydia a little awed.
"Yes I painted the Taj Mahal."
"What's that??" said Lydia.
Mr Yeates laughed.
"Well I don't know what the Taj Mahal is Mr Yeates." Replied Kitty primly, not quite knowing why she wanted to save face for her sister.
"I'll have to show it to you some day."
"The painting?" asked Lydia.
"No the real thing." Smiled Mr Yeates.
Lydia knit her brows together, was he being serious?
Miles breathed slowly as he rowed. He wasn't focussing on anything in particular; he was just focussing on surviving the rest of this boat trip. Thank heavens Miss Smart had decided to talk about bonnets; he never thought he would see the day that he would be glad of talk about female apparel.
"Yes and Mama said that orange would look lovely as a covering for my new bonnet, and I could get a new pelisse in the same style."
Annabelle screwed up her nose at the idea of a walking orange, but allowed the comment to pass.
"Oh I like orange Miss Smart." Said Miss Dew, trying to rejoin the conversation.
"Yes and there was that lime gown I have, mama thought it would be nice to brighten it up with fuchsia ribbons!" cooed Miss Smart.
"Oh I think that sounds lovely Miss Smart." Simpered Miss Dew.
Miss Grantley joined in the conversation; "Oh and I bought some tan gloves to go with my rose pink riding dress."
"Oh how absolutely marvellous, I think rose pink and tan perfectly complement each other." Giggled Miss Dew.
"Do you dear? Do you have any original thoughts?" asked Annabelle in her nicest tone.
Miss Dew blinked several times, and nervously turned to look at her chosen protectors back.
"Dear me the water has gotten a bit choppy hasn't it..." said Wickham nervously, wondering if open warfare could be engaged in a boat.
"Yes Captain it has, shall we draw the boat up to the pier?" growled Miles.
"Yes M'lord." Said Wickham, fearing that saying anything else, would lead to him (Wickham) being in a very tricky situation.
Part Three
"And life is a road that I wanna keep going /Love is a river, I wanna keep flowing /Life is a road, now and forever, wonderful journey /I'll be there when the world stops turning /I'll be there when the storm is through /In the end I wanna be standing At the beginning with you, ~ At the Beginning song from Anastasia.
Annabelle stormed out of the boat and flounced off up a rocky path. God she despised Miss Dew, putting her claws into any and every man she saw, the nerve of her.
Annabelle reached the crest of the slight hill, taking in the picturesque view of the rolling dip beyond it, before she even realised she was being followed. Turning her head she gave a smile, a little flip of the head and she bounced down the path into the sheltered little copse.
Reaching the bottom, she finally pretended to perceive she was being followed.
"Miles! You didn't have to follow me! I am quite safe on my own as you can see, but it was very thoughtful of you."
Miles stopped a few paces away from her a stormy expression on his face. "Oh don't you even dare Belle!"
"Dare what?"
"Dare what? What the hell have you been doing for the past several hours...no....no...make that your entire life. You are nothing but a selfish brat."
Annabelle's mouth dropped. "A Selfish Brat? Is this because of what I said about Captain Wickham...."
"No this is about WHY you decided to say that."
"It was the truth....:"
"No you deliberately wanted to wound, you have been doing everything in your power to deliberately hurt me ever since you came out Belle, and that is fine with me, I can handle that. I'm a big boy. But when you turn your malevolent spite on a seventeen year old girl unable to defend herself."
"Why is she incapable of defending herself, I'm sure she can if she wants to...and she has provoked..."
"Provoked you? How? By being pretty? By being worth the attention of a man? Wake up to yourself, you were jealous of the fact she could possibly be a rival to yourself."
"She would never rival me..."
"If you didn't think she could rival you, then why decide to lampoon her? I mean to openly and very publicly insult her?"
"I.... I...."
"Was it fun? That is your overall problem; you have a very misguided sense of fun and your own self-importance. You think anyone is amused by your so called wit?"
"I never professed to be - "
"You spent that entire boat ride, showing to the world the worst side of your personality, indeed at the moment the only side of your personality I or anyone else can see. You think that accident of birth gives you the right, nay privilege to play social judge, jury and executioner? Oh wait may I ask if you think at all?"
"How dare you! I'm not some - "
"More hair than wit, ninny-hammer? Really I would not have guessed. You seem so at ease when passing judgement on a young lady who you have known for all of five minutes."
"Well how long have - "
"How long have I known her? I have known her for some considerable length of time, and I have seen the likes of Miss Smart and Miss Grantley, scoop her up as a bosom-bow, and I was stupid enough to think that you might exercise the some measure, of mistaken, social standing you have, to help her find some more suitable companions."
"You think that I should - "
"I would not have her be your friend for all the tea in China. She is a sweet creature, you are nothing more that a jaded piece of baggage, and I warn you Belle, your court will fast dwindle if you carry on acting like the Queen of the world, having no consideration for anyone else but yourself."
"I have consideration for others!"
"Really, enlighten me? Where was that consideration when you insulted Wickham and Miss Dew today?"
"I never insulted Wickham!"
"I call using him to further your own, selfish ends, insulting him. You pay him little attention except when he is useful to you. I believe most of your friends have suffered this kind of insult from you."
" I don't mean - "
"Don't mean to hurt people? Well than that just goes to highlight my point about you not thinking."
"Why bring this up all now Miles? Why suddenly decide to spell out my faults?" Annabelle stood her ground, her face growing almost as red from anger as Miles' had once been. "Is it because of Miss Dew?"
"Partly."
"Partly!" repeated Annabelle, triumphantly, but her voice cracked on the last syllable. Partly. He was finding fault with her because of Miss Dew....
"What on earth is Miss Dew to you pray?" stammered Annabelle angrily.
Miles didn't answer.
"I asked you, what on earth is Miss Dew to you pray?"
"My feelings are of no concern of yours Annabelle, and I won't be interrogated by you. But I will tell you this much, I will not see you hurt her. I have reached the end of the proverbial rope, I can no longer watch you waltz around deliberately harming people!"
Annabelle gaped at him. What was Miss Dew to him? Did he love Miss Dew? It sounded as if he loved Miss Dew. He loved Miss Dew.
Annabelle felt the ground beneath her feet shift. He loved Miss Dew?
"You love her...." She gasped at him. Miles looked at her quizzically, but without responding.
Annabelle turned on her heel and fled.
He couldn't love Miss Dew. He was supposed to love her! He wasn't supposed to love anyone else, he was supposed to love her! He was hers by rights...he was supposed to love her as much as she loved him. He was supposed to love her as much as she loved him.
Annabelle paused in her tracks. A sense of dread filled her....as much as she loved him...
Part Four
I don't wanna hear you tell me everything is wonderful now/ I don't wanna hear you say I will understand someday /I don't wanna hear you say you both have grown in a different way /I don't wanna meet your friends and I don't wanna start over again/ I just wanna my life to be the same, just like it used to be/ Somedays I hate everything, I hate everything/ Everyone and everything /Please don't tell me everything is wonderful now ~ 'wonderful' by Everclear.
Mary tried to focus her attention on the water. Her mind was swimming, nothing was making sense.
"Mary...."
"Be quiet. I'm trying to think."
"Mary......"
Mary glared at Sir Christian. "What?" she snapped.
"Are you sure you don't want this?" Sir Christian was holding a ring.
"You had a ring?" the anger in Mary's voice was very apparent. "You just assumed I'd say yes."
"You did, twice!"
"I did not!"
Sir Christian simply arched an eyebrow and ignored Mary's exclamation. "Well if you must know, I always carry a ring around with me, I'm a rake."
Mary goggled at him. "You just don't know when you might be forced to marry someone?!?"
"Something like that."
"I don't believe you." Mary stated baldly.
"Good thinking. It's actually my signet ring, well my father's signet ring he gave it to me."
"You were going to offer me your father's signet ring?"
"Well only temporarily...why you aren't a diamond girl are you?'
"Why assume that? I might want a gigantic diamond ring."
"Well you aren't getting one. It would look pretentious
"Well it's a good thing I'm not marrying you then isn't it."
"Don't be pertinacious Mary."
"Pe- what?"
"Pertinacious"
Mary scrunched up her nose.
"P - E - R - T -- I - N - A - C - I - O - U - S; pertinacious" Sir Christian had edged closer with ever letter, until he was practically on top of Mary, looking directly down at her.
"Now you wouldn't want to be pertinacious would you?"
"No...." whispered Mary, transfixed.
"Ash..."
" Yessssss"
"What the hell are you doing." Snapped Lord Douglas
Ash looked up at his cousin bemused. "What is wrong Douglas?"
"You! You are making me dizzy, all this circling. I know you are worried about leaving Miss..... the Misses Bennet's in the same boat with Mr Collins, but could we please stop. Teddy looks green."
"I'm not sick!" exclaimed Lord Holling.
"Then why are you at the bottom of the boat?"
"Because I'm feeling ill."
Lord Douglas stared at his elder brother. "But you just said - "
"I'm not feeling sea -sick, but I am feeling ill from other means."
Lord Douglas understood the pointed glare and decided to drop the questions.
However about 2 minutes and several circles later, Lord Douglas couldn't contain his wrath.
"Ash give me the damn oars."
"No." said Ash somewhat sulkily.
"Give me the damn oars or stop rowing."
"I don't want to. I want to row!"
Lord Douglas made a lunge for the oars, and a fight ensued.
Lord Holling cowed down further in the boat. It wasn't that he was a coward; it was simply that he had been present at too many fights between his younger brother and cousin, and somehow, he was the one who always managed to be hit on the head. Once it evened happened when he was in a different county.
It happened again.
Ash froze, mid fight and looked down at Lord Holling. "You all right Teddy?"
"For someone who has been brained for the millionth time in their life, yes I'm fine."
Lord Douglas bit his lip. "Sure you are all right Teddy."
"Yes I'm fine. Now I insist you give ME the damn oars."
Lord Holling seated himself, grasping both oars and began to row, towards the Miss Bennets boat.
Lord Douglas groaned. Ash decided it was far easier to eavesdrop when one wasn't rowing and tried to discern what was happening in the other boat.
Kitty sighed. Mr Collins had been giving them an educational discussion about the merits of plants in curing various embarrassing and disgusting ailments that alternatively he or his father had acquired over the years.
She had had the sole pleasure of trying to divert Mr Collins from this interesting discussion, because Mr Yeates' jaw had dropped, and he seemed unable to think let alone try and save the situation. Lydia was her usual self - absolutely no help at all.
"Mr Yeates, perhaps you would like to tell us about India." Said Kitty encouragingly. Mr Yeates didn't appear to hear her; he was still recovering from the mental pictures that Mr Collins had invoked while discussing the medicinal use of arrowroot.
"Lydia, did you find that new dress?" prompted Kitty.
Lydia just gave an inane giggle, looking sideways at Mr Yeates, wondering why he looked more attractive when he was in a trance.
"Mr Collins! Why there is Lady Catherine!" pointed Kitty, hoping desperately that skin ailments weren't next on Collins' list of things to discuss.
"My lady patroness?? Where?" cried Mr Collins, finally derailed.
"On the banks. She is there with the rest of the picnickers."
Mr Collins swivelled his head to take the bank in.
"Oh my! She is there! Oh dear she is about to sit down on that clump of dirt. She will be most seriously displeased."
Kitty became alarmed when Mr Collins stood up and started waving madly at the shore.
"Mr Collins! Sit down!"
Mr Yeates tried to pull Mr Collins back into a seated position but he too failed.
"Lady Catherine! Be Careful that log could be diseased."
"Mr Collins! She cannot hear you from the banks!" Kitty tugged at Mr Collins sleeve, worried that his rocking would capsize the boat, and she did not know how to swim.
Kitty gingerly tried to stand up to force Mr Collins to sit down.
"Mr Collins!"
"My dear Lady Catherine! Be Careful!" he yelled towards the shore.
"Mr COLLINS!" Kitty tried a final time to get his attention, casting a worried eye at the other end of the boat, which was dipping down alarmingly. Mr Yeates and Lydia were clinging for dear life, as the side got closer to the water.
"Yes my dear marigold?" asked Mr Collins swinging around, forgetting he still held an oar in one hand. The oar hit Kitty on the side of the head, and she was flung overboard.