Beginning , Section II

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Part Twelve

Posted on Saturday, 28 June 2003,

Elizabeth stood immovable only for a second. To see him go was unbearable. Later she could hardly explain to herself her own actions but at that moment everything she was doing seemed quite right to her. She almost ran to him, caught his hand and exclaimed –

“Please, Mr Darcy, stop, do not go! I must explain everything to you. You must know.”

Darcy, still unable to recover from the pain she had caused by her rejection, was utterly surprised by this sudden application. He looked at her fingers grasping his hand, then raised his eyes up to her face and saw her blushing violently. Suddenly Elizabeth felt all the impropriety of this situation and released his hand. Darcy, rather disappointed by the loss of her touch than displeased with her manners, said in a tired tone –

“Miss Bennet, there is no need to repeat those expressions, which would only bring additional pain and confusion. I perfectly understood your answer, I assure you.”

“Mr Darcy, please, listen to me. I must, I have to tell you everything.”

Darcy turned away to the window, remained silent for several minutes, then turned his thoughtful face to her and replied –

“I am listening to you, Miss Bennet.”

Elizabeth sighed deeply and asked a question, which seemed to him a most inappropriate one at the moment –

“Mr Darcy, do you remember our conversation at Netherfield ball when we danced together?”

He looked amazed and nodded.

“Then I told you of my attempts of illustrating you character.”

“Yes, I remember this perfectly well.”

“You were absolutely right, Mr Darcy, when asking me not to sketch your character at that moment; for I was so eager to find out confirmation for my own disliking you that I drove reason away where you were concerned.”

“Your own disliking me,” he only could utter looking rather stupidly at that moment.

“It is not my intention, sir, to pain you, but it is inevitable. I am so ashamed of my former opinions and thoughts, I can not express to you the full extent of my sorrow and regret for acting so despicably, so uncivilly towards you.”

“Miss Bennet, I am totally ignorant of what you accused yourself with such an energy, so I can hardly understand your words. Be so kind as to explain to me the whole story.”

“Mr Darcy, from the very beginning of my acquaintance with you I thought you to be a disagreeable, unpleasant sort of man devoid of every proper feeling. Forgive me the pain I inflicted on you by these bitter words, but I must reveal the truth that will show myself being unworthy of your admiration and esteem. But the further repetition of my apologies might seem absurd to you, so it only remains to me to explain the reasons of my previous dislike. Many months ago I received some information concerning you from the authority which seemed trustworthy at that moment – from Mr Wickham.”

She saw him started on her mentioning Wickham’s name. She half- expected him to say something, but he remained silent, only his eyes fixed on her face with an additional tension.

“He had accused you,” she continued, “of being the only source of all his misfortunes, that you had deprived him of independence and every hope for the happy future. He informed that your father had promised a family living to him and that you had refused to execute your own father’s will. I had trusted his every word, for at that moment my own attitude towards you had been all dislike and prejudice. Only during my visit to Kent did I begin to comprehend my own foolishness. Your kindness that last evening at Rosings made me reconsider all my former opinions and at the first time I made an attempt to comprehend the real nature of your relations with Mr Wickham. I was so ashamed of myself, you know not, you can not imagine how heartily did I then regret every ungracious sensation towards you.”

Her voice began to tremble, she silenced and for a few minutes could not speak another word. During her emotional speech the expression of Mr Darcy’s face changed gradually from the first amazement to constrained gravity and then to compassion and concern. These several minutes of awkward silence were some of the most uncomfortable of her life. At length she regained her composure and added –

“I could find no words, or circumstances to justify myself. But you must agree, sir, that your haughty and reserved manners do not invite other people to a close acquaintance, so detection could not be in my power, and you have never given me an opportunity to know your real worth. I only begin to respect and esteem you, sir, I am sensible of the honour of your proposals, it is gratifying to have inspired so strong a partiality. But I can not marry without affection and I do not know you well enough to accept you. In spite of all the temptations your offer may produce I have no right of throwing you and myself into discredit and misery of the hasty marriage deprived of love. I have nothing more to say on this subject. If my words offended you I can only offer my sincere apologies.”

When she uttered these last phrases Darcy turned again into the man she had known in Hertfordshire. The look of his eyes was earnest and even haughty, his face lost all the pleasant and open countenance she watched just a moment ago. She was not surprised at this change at him, for her confessions were those as to make him see all her faults and vices. She could neither wonder nor condemn. But this change deeply tormented her; she knew not why but his good opinion, already lost, she thought, suddenly became very valuable. She could not bear the idea of his thinking ill of her. She was struggling with tears successfully, for Mr Darcy scarcely noticed them – he was walking up and down the room in earnest meditation, his brow contracted, his air gloomy. At length he stopped in his walk and turned towards her. She expected him depart without delay and was somewhat astonished at the sound of his distracted, a little confused voice –

“I must confess, Miss Bennet, that you have extremely surprised me, though I have always thought myself being prepared to the most extraordinary events and situations. I can not say that I am very pleased with the revelations you have just made. Pardon me, please, my long silence, for I had to know what could or ought to be revealed. Listen to the whole of Mr Wickham’s connection with my family, madam, for I see that only by relating to you the whole story I could be totally acquitted of cruelty towards Mr. Wickham.”

So he related to her the particulars of all the pecuniary transactions in which they had been connected. When this subject was succeeded by his account of Miss Darcy’s meditated elopement, she could see hesitation and pain on his face, but he did not stop. She was full of regret and compassion towards him, she wanted to offer some consolation to him but she dared not.

“This, madam, is a faithful narrative of every event in which we have been concerned together. Mr Wickham’s success is not perhaps to be wandered at, ignorant as you previously were of everything concerning either. Suspicion is certainly not in your inclination.”

Mr Darcy looked pale and tired of mental exertions just made. His eyes were fixed on her face and the expression of her eyes made his heart at first sink and then beat even more quickly than before. She felt for him, he could say that with confidence, he saw in her eyes not hatred or dislike, but tears of compassion. And he uttered the words, which he thought impossible to be said just a moment ago –

“Miss Bennet, may I hope?”

“What?” she opened her lips in utter astonishment.

He immediately understood that there was the only way for him to act, that after entering this room and making his proposal he admitted the necessity of Miss Elizabeth Bennet’s being a part of his life.

“May I hope?” repeated he, “Have I ever a chance to make you love me?”

Part Thirteen

Posted on Wednesday, 2 July 2003

At first Elizabeth sincerely thought that she had mistaken his words but the repetition of those very expressions made her feel astonishment equal to what she had known on listening to his proposal of marriage.

“I thought, after everything I said you would not wish to see me any more.”

“Miss Bennet, I have never given you a reason to believe my sentiments so inconstant” said Darcy and a light smile touched his lips. “Indeed, you can not think me capable of changing my feelings and opinions so quickly.”

Elizabeth was silent. His application had awoken a storm of different emotions in her breast. It would have been much easier for her had Darcy gone away without a word at once after her apologies. Nothing could have confused and perplexed her more than this simple and frank expression of his feelings. She would have preferred his reserve, his silence, even his hauteur to this sudden change, to his openness and honesty. She could not resist his kindness. What was she to say? She did not want to trifle with him. How did she wish to be sure of her own feelings but several last days made her very unconfident on that subject. She could hardly define emotions Darcy excited in her. Gratitude for his admiration and love? Undoubtedly. Respect? Yes, she respected him for his just and honourable character, for his kindness towards his sister, which she had observed during previous days, for patience and indulgence with which he had treated herself. She respected, she esteemed, she was grateful to him, she felt a real interest in his welfare, but she could not tell that she loved him. That wish to love him, which had so suddenly been awaken at Pemberley only yesterday did not make her comfortable, that was impossible, all she felt at the moment was confusion and uneasiness. His persistent look expressed a mixture of tenderness and unusual patience, which she had never seen in him before. He was waiting for her response and the more Elizabeth thought on that subject the more difficult the solution seemed to her. How could she encourage him if this hope might be vain? She did not want to pain him any longer.

“Please, Mr Darcy, do not look at me” whispered Elizabeth to herself, “ Just go away! I need time. I can not tell you anything now.”

Darcy started.

“What did you say, Miss Bennet?”

Elizabeth tried to calm down. She knew that she must answer immediately. Her mid was full with various thoughts and recollections.

“I do not know who is good enough for him.”

“He is really handsome.”

“I have never given you a reason to believe my sentiments so inconstant.”

At that moment she realized that constancy had always been the main feature of his character and this thought disturbed her a good deal. Constant in his persuasions, opinions, affections, he must be the very person whose love could become the most valuable for her. And she was ready to say, “Yes, you may hope.” when trying to avoid his gaze, she looked at the table where she left Jane’s letters. Her heart sank. And she recollected everything: Her conversation with Colonel Fitzwilliam, Jane’s sufferings, her own anger against this man. This was the moment to find out the truth. Elizabeth collected all her courage and said –

“I can not, Mr Darcy. Oh, I wish it was less complicated, less painful for you and myself.”

“What do you want to tell me, Miss Bennet?”

“Mr Darcy, I do not want to recollect that affair but my heart, my sisterly affections are those that induce me to speak. It was you who separated Mr Bingley from my sister Jane. Do you know in what misery did you involve her by acting with such unjustifiable cruelty, yes, cruelty – for I can not find another word.”

Mr Darcy first became pale with anger and even rage, he was struggling for the appearance of composure. Several minutes of silence were very awkward. Different feelings were reflected on his face. Al length he said with assumed tranquility –

“So this time you accuse me of cruelty towards your sister. Do not you think, Miss Bennet, that you have already proved yourself to be able to jump to hasty ill-founded conclusions? It must have made you more cautious in your further presumptions, but as I can see this supposition of mine is faulty.”

“What do you want me to say?” asked Elizabeth in a tired tone, “That I am heartily sorry, that I will feel shame and regret till the end of my life? I may assure you, Mr Darcy, that it is to be so. I have already apologized for my former opinion of you, but as I can see you think my humiliation insufficient. I can not justify my former doings, but are you able to justify yours? Would you deny that you divided Jane and Mr Bingley from each other?”

“I have no wish of denying that I did everything in my power to separate my friend from your sister. Could you expect me to stand aloof and not to try to save Bingley from the marriage with a woman indifferent to him?”

“Are you out of your senses?” exclaimed Elizabeth with a great energy, “How could you even suppose Jane to be indifferent to Mr Bingley? How could not you notice her admiration of him, her obvious pleasure in being in his company? This is beyond belief, this can not be!”

Darcy cried –

“I will not allow anybody, even you, Miss Bennet, to speak to me in such a tone. You are forgetting yourself! I would be very grateful to you if you at least try to check your impertinence and insolence. Such incivility is not to be borne!”

Elizabeth was so amazed and even frightened by this sudden explosion of his anger, for she had always thought him to be the master of his emotions, that could hardly utter a word. Darcy immediately noticed her pallor and continued in a little milder and very thoughtful tone –

“You undoubtedly know your sister’s disposition much better than me, Miss Bennet. Are you sure of her sentiments?”

Elizabeth could not understand the reason for such a question. She had been persuaded so long that all her relations were aware of Jane’s feelings that she could not imagine someone to be ignorant. She forced herself to speak –

“Jane was partial to Mr Bingley. I fear, she still cares for him.”

He was silent. His face regained its former contemplating countenance. And then Elizabeth saw a weak bitter smile on his face.

“I said once to you, Miss Bennet, that your defect was willfully to misunderstand people. But it is evident that we share the same vice.”

Then he again became grave, and after a few moments’ reflections continued –

“I have never supposed that your sister was partial to my friend. I think it is my turn to apologize, Miss Bennet. If I had wounded your sister’s feelings it was unknowingly done. Considering all you have just said I am sure you thought my objections to the marriage were based merely on the lack of fortune and social inferiority. But it was not so, I assure you. The situation of your family, though objectionable, was nothing in comparison to the total want of propriety so frequently betrayed by your mother. By your three younger sisters, and occasionally even by your father. Pardon me. It pains me to offend you. But the main reason for my interference was a total and sincere belief in your sister’s indifference towards Bingley. I watched her attentively and noticed no symptoms of peculiar regard. All these inducements led me to preserve my friend from what I esteemed a most unhappy connection. And now I could only explain my own part in this affair. I assured Bingley of your sister’s indifference, for he intended to propose after his return from London. Bingley has great natural modesty, with a stronger dependence on my judgement than on his own. So he believed me. Also I had to conceal from him your sister’s being in town, for I was afraid of his regard being not entirely extinguished. I have nothing more to say. If your sister was partial to Bingley, then I must admit that I was wrong. But all my apologies can not cure your sister’s wound. If you think that you would be able to forgive me some day tell me so at once. I know, I ask too much.”

Elizabeth silently confessed to herself that the idea of Darcy’s belief in her sister’s indifference had never crossed her mind before. Was he sincere? She wanted to believe him, she felt a strong necessity to believe. Suspicions and scruples would awaken later. At that moment she had done the only thing, which seemed the most natural and right to her – she silently approached him and almost unconsciously held out her hand. Darcy touched it rather unconfidently and then pressed it with a great warmth.

Part Fourteen

Posted on Friday, 11 July 2003

Elizabeth had never experienced such feelings before. Had she known that a simple touch would excite the tremor and agitation she felt at that moment she would undoubtedly have refrained from acting with such an indifference to decorum. Mr Darcy was still holding her hand in his. She felt that she must say or do something for the situation was becoming more and more awkward. Had she been able to read her companion's thoughts she would have felt much more confused for Darcy not only enjoyed every moment of this unexpected contact but also had to make some exertions not to approach closer and act in a most ungentlemanlike manner.

He saw her blushing gradually and not without sigh of regret released her fingers but before this he said –

"It means yes, I hope.''

Elizabeth lifted her eyes and with a light smile replied –

"Yes, Mr Darcy, I think, I will be able to forgive you,'' and then with some hesitation added, ''And yes, you may hope.''

Only at that moment did Darcy realize the full extent of the fear with which he was waiting for her answer. The strongest feeling in his breast was relief for he hardly knew how to act had she said ''no''. He had been persuaded that he would endure her rejection and in some months or years he would be able to forget or at least learn to live without her, but he did not want even to imagine his life where would be no this woman. During last months he did nothing but struggled against himself, his heart, his feelings, but this struggle was over now and he felt lightness.

''I wish the evening came sooner. I must confess, Miss Bennet, that I am a very impatient person and it is very hard to leave you now.''

He saw her confusion, smiled privately and added –

''But do not distress yourself. I referred only to the evening. For your answer I will wait so patiently that you will have no reason for displeasure.''

It was evident to her that he wished to stay longer but her own agitation and anxiety made her quite unable to carry on a conversation and Darcy soon understood it.

"I have to leave. Please, pay my compliments to Mr and Mrs Gardiner. I could say that I am sorry to miss them but it would be a lie.''

Elizabeth blushed again and was almost relieved when he was gone. She did not want to show him that she felt uneasiness in his company but considering the circumstances of this morning it was not difficult to imagine her state, and her wish to stay alone and to think was quite excusable. The tumult of her mind was now really great. She walked about the room for a few minutes, then sat down and tried to regain her composure. All what had just happened excited an utter astonishment but the greatest amazement she felt when dwelling upon her own feelings and actions. She could not understand herself. He was the very man whose unpardonable interference separated Jane and Bingley, whose hauteur and pride made him disagreeable in the opinion of all her acquaintance, whom she herself considered as a most unpleasant man she had ever seen only several months ago. How could she be so inconstant? How could she encourage him? And the most important question – why had she been so ready, so eager to believe him and to forgive all the awful things he had done? She knew that the great share of blame for Jane's sufferings belonged to Miss Bingley, but Darcy could not be still completely acquitted if his role in that affair. And, yet, she was ready to forgive him, no, she had already forgiven him. She had always wondered how could Jane excuse Mr Bingley's sudden departure, how could she find so many circumstances to justify his conduct, but now her amazement was sinking. Jane had always seen only good in people but the main reason for her blindness was love. And Elizabeth could not remain ignorant of her own attitude towards Darcy any more. Why was there so much pain and embarrassment she felt when thought of him? Why did he engage all her thoughts during last days, why did the loss of his good opinion seem the worst evil to her? A few seconds were sufficient for her to answer all these questions. She must be in love with him – it was the only possible explanation.

''No, it can not be true!'' exclaimed she jumping to her feet. ''How can I love him? No, it is impossible!''

And, yet, it was true. She knew it. She wondered at the perverseness of her own feelings, it was almost unbelievable that she fell in love with the man whose company had recently been unbearable to her.

If gratitude and esteem are good foundations of affection, Elizabeth's change of sentiment will be neither improbable nor faulty. But above all, above respect and gratitude there was one more motive, which could not be overlooked. It was tenderness and compassion excited not only in response to his own tenderness, but also by the bitter confessions he had made. She was sure that those revelations had not been maid to awaken compassion in her breast but it was so. To know what he had endured and experienced, to learn about his grief, his sister's sufferings was painful. The more she thought of it the more ashamed she felt of her former prejudices. And now she loved this man. And suddenly joy overwhelmed her.

''I will see him in the evening,'' said Elizabeth to herself. ''I will see him and tell him that there is no need for him to hope, that he has already made me love him.''

She blushed.

"I love him. What could be more just and natural than a love for a man who deserves to be loved? Oh, yes, I will tell him everything today!''

Such her thoughts had been when she took Jane's first letter. She had very quickly gone through its beginning but its further content was the most alarming. Lydia had run with Wickham! It was impossible! It was beyond belief! She could not understand why Wickham had decided to marry a girl who could offer him so little. No fortune, no connections. Without allowing herself time for consideration, and scarcely knowing what she felt, Elizabeth on finishing the first letter instantly seized the other and after having read it she hardly knew what to do. She sat down again, unable to support herself. At length she realized that she had no right to lose a moment of the time so precious and calling the servant, she commissioned him to fetch his master and mistress home immediately.

On his quitting the room she tried to recover herself, though she was in such a perturbed state of mind that all her attempts were vain, at least until she found herself at the table writing a letter to the man whom she loved and whose love this letter would undoubtedly destroy.

''Forgive me, sir, my impertinence in addressing to you in such an improper manner, but circumstances are those that induce me to act without delay and with some indifference to decorum. You must, therefore, pardon the freedom with which I demand your attention, I know that you will understand the reasons which enforced me to write this letter.

If not but the events of this morning I, perhaps, would never have enough courage to relate to you the dreadful news I have just received. But your kind offer could not be forgotten or neglected so I will try to save you from all the inconveniences and troubles the connection with me and my family would undoubtedly bring. I have just learnt from Jane's letter that my youngest sister Lydia had left all her friends – had eloped, had thrown herself into the power of Mr Wickham! They were gone off together from Brighton. Aware of all the particulars you related to me during your last visit, I can not even doubt the rest, and you, I suppose, cannot doubt too. She is lost forever, her reputation is ruined, for she has no money, no connections, nothing that can tempt him to marry her. At first it was thought that they were on their way to Gretna-Green, but it was a false supposition. They left Brighton together on Sunday night and were traced almost to London, they certainly not gone to Scotland. Jane asked us all to return to Longbourn as soon as possible, for my uncle's advice and assistance would be everything in the world at such a moment. We are leaving very soon, perhaps, in an hour, so, please apologize for us to Miss Darcy for not attending Pemberley today. Say that urgent business called us home immediately. Conceal the unhappy truth as long as it is possible, I depend on your secrecy.

When I consider that I might have prevented this awful event I feel so deep a pain that no words can express. Had his character been known, had I been less secret, less cautious, had I not been so afraid of doing too much, this could not have happened. But all this is vain, it is too late now. I have not the smallest hope.

What can I add? I am most heartily grateful to you for these several days at Pemberley, for your kindness and attention, for your hospitality and especially for the words I heard from you just this morning. I will forever keep in my memory all the particulars of previous three days, for these recollections made me even more bitterly regret my former prejudices and ill-founded opinions of you and think of my own unworth. I hope, that all I related to you will help you to overcome your feelings and forget all your intentions towards me. I have no right and especially wish to ruin you, sir, in the opinion of the world and all your friends, I wish you only happiness and can not be a source of any troubles to you.

You will receive this letter after we are gone and I hope, you will be pleased, at least a little, to know that I will always remember you as one of the most generous-hearted and compassionate mortals in the world.

Do not think ill of me, sir, for your good opinion and friendship are very precious for me. Had the circumstances been different, perhaps, I would not… Forgive me, sir. Forgive all the pain I caused to you. Forgive me and forget all what passed between us this morning. I want to think that I will be able to forget it too. I release you from all your promises, from every feeling of obligation you could feel. I will only add, God bless you.

Elizabeth Bennet."

Part Fifteen

Posted on Friday, 18 July 2003

When Elizabeth finished the letter her hands were trembling and eyes full of tears. She already felt a loss of the man who only several months ago seemed the most disagreeable and unpleasant among all her acquaintance. Remembrances of his kindness, his warm words and especially his ardent confession in love tormented her. She understood perfectly that he was lost forever, that under such a proof of family weakness, such an assurance of the deepest disgrace his affections could not remain constant. In this early example of what Lydia’s infamy must produce she found additional anguish as she reflected on that wretched business. Never, since reading Jane’s second letter, had she entertained a hope of Wickham’s meaning to marry her.

When writing her letter to Darcy she hardly realized the meaning of those words and expressions, which she put on the paper without preliminary consideration. But after having re-read the letter she had crossed out none word. The only sentence she wished to be unwritten was “Had the circumstances been different I would not…” But she had no time to re-write the letter for her aunt and uncle could return at any moment and she was afraid of the suspicions, which would inevitably arisen had they noticed the letter.

After a moment’s deliberation she wrote her aunt’s name on the envelope. Though such tricks were abhorrent to her she did not dare put her own name; she felt all the impropriety of writing to a man who was not her relation and the thought that somebody but Mr Darcy could read her letter horrified her a great deal. She called the chambermaid and asked to send the letter to Pemberley after their departure.

Then she closed her eyes and allowed herself a moment of rest. Though rest seemed impossible to her she knew that she must at least try. But everything was in vain. The thoughts of Lydia’s disgraceful conduct, of the misery her thoughtlessness brought on their family, tormented her. She blamed herself for a lack of courage, which prevented her from sharing her suspicions concerning Wickham’s real character at least with members of her family. And though she realized that she could have done nothing, that no one in her family except Jane would have believed her, her thoughts did not lose their bitterness and every moment brought new regrets.

At last Elzabeth was relieved by the appearance of the Gardiners. She communicated the cause of their summons, reading the two letters aloud. Mr Gardiner readily promised every assistance in his power. After many expressions of gratitude on Elizabeth’s side, everything relating to their journey was speedily settled. They were to be off as soon as possible.

“But what is to be done about Pemberley?'' cried Mrs Gardiner. “John told us Mr Darcy paid a visit to you when we were out.”

This time Elizabeth had to be reduced to some lies and said in a constrained manner that everything had been settled between them during his visit. Then she ran into her room to prepare having left her aunt in all the perplexity about the real relationship between her niece and the gentleman. But there was no time for suggestions and suspicions and she had her share of business as well as her niece, and amongst the rest there were notes to be written to all their friends in Lambton, with false excuses for their sudden departure. An hour, however, saw the whole completed and Elizabeth, after all the misery of the morning, found herself, in a shorter space of time than she could have supposed, seated in the carriage, and on the road to Longbourn.

At that time Darcy was in anticipation of the forthcoming evening. The servants were somewhat amazed at the embarrassment and even nervousness in the conduct of their reserved and confident master. It seemed to him that in the evening all his problems would be solved, all misunderstandings between him and Elizabeth would end and they would reach at length the real happiness. He still could not believe what had happened this morning. His proposals, though not totally rejected, had not been at the same time been accepted with gratitude and delight as he had expected. He had never imagined before that Elizabeth could have disliked and even hated him. Her boldness and impertinent manners towards him he had always considered as a particular kind of flirtation, he believed her to be wishing, expecting his addresses. And then such a disclosure – to learn that the woman he chose to be his wife, his partner in life, was not so delighted and overwhelmed with joy as he expected her to be. That was a noticeable stroke to his vanity as he could hardly imagine a woman able to refuse him. Only his ardent love for Elizabeth prevented him from leaving after her having made her awful confessions. He was wounded by her words. He did not show it to her, but every expression of hers had been engraved upon his memory and it pained him to know how ill had she once thought of him. But he drove such thoughts away. She said that he may hope and he dwelt upon these words again and again, finding every time a new consolation in them.

He was in the drawing-room with Bingley and the ladies when the servant brought a letter. He was surprised to receive a note from Mrs Gardiner, it was the last thing he expected at that moment to happen. He instantly opened the letter. But when he had gone through the first lines, he realized who the real author of the letter had been and paled. He excused himself and almost ran to the library. He needed solitude.

The contents of the letter threw Darcy into the depth of desperation he never experienced before. He could not bear this. He was angry with Elizabeth for her thoughtlessness in writing such a letter, with himself for having indulged in a dream which would never come true, for he always knew that there would be no good in connection with such a family as the Bennets. He almost blamed himself for having confessed his love to Elizabeth, for had he been more cautious and sensible of his responsibilities he would not feel the pain and anguish he experienced at the moment. It had been weakness on his side, he thought, just a moment of weakness.

And, yet, he was grateful to Elizabeth for her letter, though he was aware of all the impropriety of such an action. He was grateful to her for releasing him from his promise. Being a man of honour he would feel obliged to keep his promise despite the change of his wishes. He would ought, he would have to marry her had she wished to have him.

He understood that Elizabeth knew. She knew how he would feel when he learnt about her sister’s elopement with Wickham. She could imagine his abhorrence, his horror against relationship with the family, which proved to possess all possible defects and vices.

“Why are you so generous? said he quietly. “Why not mercenary, selfish, covetous? Why are not you such for then I would have the reason to forget you?”

He knew it was impossible. He would never forget her. Every gesture, every word of hers during these several days he would keep in his memory for the rest of his life. And, yet, he could not have her. His pride had awaken again and protested against this union with an additional strength. His heart ached, his soul begged to see her again, but he was resolute. She was lost for him and he must learn to live without her.

In the empty dark library Darcy closed his eyes.

“What has he done to us, Elizabeth? What has this scoundrel done to us? And how will I forget you if I do not want to forget?”

But there was no answer, only silence.

Part Sixteen

Posted on Friday, 25 July 2003, at 5

Elizabeth foresaw that in Longbourn there would be nothing but misery and pain. But she was wild to be at home to share in all the troubles and cares with Jane for she had been persuaded that her mother would not be able to behave reasonably in that dreadful situation that had been the result of Lydia's elopement and as for Kitty and Mary Elizabeth doubted a good deal their capability and especially eagerness to help. So it may be easily believed that she was happy and relieved to see Longbourn at length and embrace Jane who met her and the Gardiners in the vestibule. There was so much to say, to hear, to discuss, but both sisters could hardly speak, they were crying. Jane could relate nothing consolatory to them. Mrs Bennet was constantly upstairs, repining at injustice of the fate and the villainous conduct of Wickham. Jane seemed pale and exhausted and Elizabeth, even without asking, knew the reason for her fatigue. And despite all the impropriety of such a feeling at such a moment she had got angry at her foolish mother incapable of any exertions and her constant nerves, at Kitty and Mary whose indifference and apathy prevented them even from showing any sign of compassion for Jane. The conduct of all her family made her feel the justice of Mr Darcy's reproaches concerning her relations, but every thought of that gentleman she drove away from her mind with such an assiduity and constant tenacity that sometimes she really believed herself capable to forget.

Mr Gardiner left the next day after their arrival to Longbourn and the rest had to do nothing but wait. Though Jane still hoped for the best and expected every morning a letter, which would announce the marriage between Wickham and Lydia, Elizabeth had no doubts concerning the dreadful sequel of this event. She could only grieve over Lydia's shameful conduct, Wickham's infamy and, above it all, over her own lack of providence. She had been persuaded that, had she related at least a part of her suspicions to her father, he would have never let Lydia go to Brighton and this awful event would have never happened.

Mrs Gardiner stayed with her nieces and did everything in her power to lessen their pain and share in their cares.

All Meryton seemed striven to blacken the man, who but three months before, had been almost an angel of light. He was declared to be in debt to every tradesman in the place, and his intrigues, all honoured with the title of seduction, had been extended into every tradesman's family. Every day brought some new report of Wickham's extravagance or irregularity.

In his first letter Mr Gardiner could not communicate any satisfactory information. Mr Bennet came to Gracechurch Street but the fugitives had not been yet discovered.

Every day at Longbourn was now a day of anxiety; but the most anxious part of each was when the post was expected. But letters expected with such impatience on all Longbourn residents' side did not bring some news of importance. Mr Collins sent a letter, officious and pompous, as his letters had always been, with many expressions of regret and self-satisfied compassion. When she went through the lines about Lady Catherine's being acquainted with all the particulars of this wretched business and her condescending concern, Elizabeth could hardly repress her anger. She felt all the thoughtlessness of her cousin buy his relating such private things to strangers and the thought of a number of people who would know about her sister's misfortune, could only deepen her anguish and misery.

Mr Gardiner's next letter did not contain any tidings of a pleasant nature. And the depressed state of her family had only increased by the news of Wickham's gaming debts more than a thousand pounds. Mr Gardiner added in his letter that Mr Bennet, disappointed by the ill success of all their endeavours, would return home. It was settled that Mrs Gardiner and her children should go to London at the same time, that Mr Bennet came from it. Though she was glad to go home at length, she felt anxiety for all her nieces, and especially for Elizabeth, whose state was almost desperate. The present unhappy state of the family rendered any other excuse for the lowliness of her spirits unnecessary, but Mrs Gardiner had some reasons to think otherwise. And she felt it necessary to talk to Elizabeth before her departure, though the delicacy of the subject arisen made her doubt whether she had a right to make such inquiries.

“Lizzy, is there any connection between your depressed state and our sudden departure from Derbyshire?”

Elizabeth lifted up her eyes but remained silent.

“I do not want to insist, I could only offer my help if you need it.”

Elizabeth sighed.

“I must talk to someone, otherwise I am afraid I would become crazy. Aunt, I am very grateful to you for your offer, I know I may always rely upon you. Prepare yourself for something extraordinary, it is very hard to believe, but please do not doubt my words and sentiments.”

“Lizzy, what do you want to tell me?”

“I fell in love, aunt.”

Mrs Gardiner was not so astonished as her niece had expected.

“With Mr Darcy, I suppose?”

“Is it so obvious?”

“Do not distress yourself, Lizzy. I doubt whether anyone else, even your uncle has suspicions. Consider that I had an opportunity to observe you both in Lambton and Pemberley. Of course, your uncle has some reasons to believe Mr Darcy partial to you, but of your sentiments he remains ignorant.”

“I myself remained ignorant till I lost every hope to meet him again. Oh, aunt, it is so dreadful to love and to know that there is no hope, that every new day would bring only pain and misery.”

Mrs Gardiner was not surprised at her niece's confession, but she could not imagine the strength of Elizabeth's affection, for considering its comparatively short duration, she did not think Elizabeth as wounded as she really was.

"What can I say, Lizzy, to console you? If he deserves you, and I am sure that he deserves, for you would not have fallen in love with a man unworthy of your regard, he will find you, he will do everything in his power to win you."

"Aunt, you perfectly know that after Lydia's elopement nobody will connect himself with such a family as ours, especially Mr Darcy with his pride and his notions of dignity. And even if Mr Wickham will marry her, though I can hardly believe in it, there is no the slightest hope of his wishing to see me again. I can not relate to you all the particulars but Mr Wickham acted most infamously and shamefully towards him and he has every reason in the world to hate him. How can I believe him capable to overlook this circumstance? How can I hope for his constancy after the stroke, which would undoubtedly destroy regard of every man?"

Mrs Gardiner touched her niece's cheek.

"Lizzy, I will not distress you any more by further inquiries. If you are sure that he will never return then you must forget him. I do not say “try” for I know that you will try. You have sense, Lizzy, and I expect you to use it. For your family’s sake, for your own sake, I know you will not allow yourself to indulge in thoughts which will do no good to you. Time will heal your wound and someday you will realize that recollections do not make you suffer any longer.”

Soon Mrs Gardiner was gone. Elizabeth was unhappy to lose the only person whom she could confide in, though her aunt promised to write very often.

Mr Bennet returned home, tranquil and grave. It was evident that he had no inclination to discuss the business that had taken him away, after several short questions Elizabeth understood that her father blamed nobody but himself for the current misfortune, that he only tried to hide his own shame and pain. Elizabeth felt for him but could offer nothing to console him.

All the family began to feel the consequences of Lydia’s elopement. It can not be said that the Bennets secluded from society but a number of invitations and visitors decreased every day. It was evident that one false step in Lydia would be injurious to the other Miss Bennets and all the spiteful old ladies in Meryton almost rejoiced in such a fate for the girls who had been considered the prettiest ladies in the place.

The month passed without any changes. Mr Gardiner sent letters every three or four days but none of his letters contained any good news. All his quests resulted in nothing. None of Wickham’s former acquaintance could communicate anything consolatory. Everyone understood that Lydia was lost forever.

A lot of sleepless nights gave Elizabeth enough time for reflections. She began to understand herself and her own feelings. Every night bitter thoughts of Lydia’s infamy tormented her and when, exhausted and fatigued, she tried at length to close her eyes and fall asleep, other recollections, which she in vain drove away from her memory, came back to her and again she stood up and walked about her room, went to the window, looked at dark trees, starry sky and cried. She recollected Mrs Gardiner’s words, she felt their justice and every day she did her best to appear tranquil and composed. The considerable part of each day she spent with Jane near her mother, trying to lessen her fears, though Mrs Bennet hardly listened to her eldest daughters’ meek exhortations and continued to lament on her poor nerves. But then night came and Elizabeth was left alone with her thoughts and recollections where too often Mr Darcy appeared. His every gesture, every look, every word she kept involuntarily in her memory. Her own affection for him began to appear the worst evil in the world for she had been persuaded that she would hardly forget him soon and there was no hope to meet him in the future. She did not expect to receive a letter from him, she knew it was impossible, but some part of her heart still hoped, though she hardly knew what she was hoping for. The prospect before her now was darkness and loneliness and the conviction that for her ruined happiness she was indebted to Wickham whom she had formerly trusted and believed with such an eagerness, made her even more miserable. She had never felt so lonely and unhappy in her life.

Darcy stayed at Pemberley. Apart from his usual responsibilities he had to play a role of a pleasant host for his guests, but never even the company of his dear friend Bingley seemed so tiresome to him. He became irritable, everybody and everything annoyed him, the servants wondered at such a change in their just and tranquil master and several tenants he visited during this month had fount it impossible to talk to their landlord about their problems. All the neighborhood began to gossip about the insufferable conduct of Mr Darcy if Pemberley and various conjectures, sometimes the most extraordinary ones, for the reason for his gravity and unwillingness to visit his neighbors had been made. His own guests did their best to avoid him and even Miss Bingley had lessen her attentions towards him and did not seek his company. Darcy knew that his behaviour was unpardonable, that he wounded feelings of the dearest creature to him – his sister, but he could do nothing. He could not pretend any more. Every new day without Elizabeth was a new torture. Her letter soon he knew by heart, so there was no need to keep it in is writing-table as he did. Every evening he locked in the library and reread her letter, the only thing of hers he had. He knew that he would identify her handwriting even in years. Again and again he dwelt upon every line, every expression, finding some odd sort of pleasure mixed with pain in this torture.

Perhaps, he would have been able to endure this anguish but also he had to deal with his own conscience. He could not remain blind to his own mistakes, he began to realize that he was a good deal answerable for Miss Lydia’s elopement. It was owing to him, to his reserve and want of proper consideration, that Wickham’s character had been so misunderstood. He always thought it beneath himself to lay his private actions open to the world. Wickham’s very name was punishment to him to pronounce and how could he make his worthlessness known to the world without revealing the facts he wished to be never mentioned again? With a bitter smile he recollected his struggle during past months, for it could not stand comparison with his present state.

Conquering his pride he wrote to his attorney in London and gave directions to him for making some inquiries after Wickham. But his attorney could not communicate any news, Wickham had not been found. The plan to go to London himself seemed to him a most impossible and crazy one. No, he could not meet Wickham again, he could not be reduced to it. Again and again he drove such thoughts away, again and again he reminded himself of his honour, his duty, his pride. And again he recollected Elizabeth’s face and imagined all her mortification and pain and his heart began to ache in response to her misery he could not relieve. Such were his thoughts and, in spite of all his endeavours, he could not forget. Her generosity in releasing him from his word demanded the equal generosity from him.

And one day more a month since Elizabeth’s departure from Derbyshire he was sitting at the fireplace with a bottle of wine. He used to drink last weeks but this evening alcohol did not bring a relief to him. He bit his lips. Her image was in his mind, in his heart. He pressed his head with his hands.

“I can not do this!” he shouted. “ Even for her sake! I can not, I can not!”

He was crying. The proud, haughty, reserved Fitzwilliam Darcy was crying as a child. His defeat was total. This last explosion of desperation had destroyed all the pride and contempt, which still remained in him. All former sensations had been driven away from his heart – all but one – his affection, his ardent love for Elizabeth Bennet.

Next morning Darcy left Pemberley and went to London.

Part Seventeen

Posted on Sunday, 31 August 2003

A letter from Mr Gardiner, which nobody expected, came to Longbourn. It can not be said that it was such an extraordinary event for Mr Gardiner still wrote once a week only to inform his brother-in-law that there was no news about Wickham and Lydia. So it can be easily imagined that when one morning the servant brought the letter for Mr Bennet it did not excite such emotions as it could have done several weeks before. All four young ladies turned to their father ready to hear the words, which had been more than once repeated during last weeks – “There is no news, girls,” but Mr Bennet surprised them by leaving the room without a word.

Jane and Elizabeth, though eager to follow their father, resolved to wait a little. But he did not return even in half an hour so they entered the library where they expected to find Mr Bennet. He was sitting in his favourite armchair with a strange deliberating expression on his face, still holding a sheet of paper in his hand.

“What happened, papa? What news?” asked Jane and Elizabeth in one voice.

“What news? It may sound strange but the letter does contain some news.”

“Well, and what news does it bring – good or bad?”

“What is there of good to be expected?” said he. “But, perhaps, you would like to read it.”

Elizabeth impatiently caught the letter from his hand and read it aloud. The very first lines of the letter produced such happiness and relief as both Miss Bennets could hardly have hoped for – the fugitives had been discovered! And though they were not married, Mr Gardiner expressed his confidence in a soon satisfactory conclusion of Lydia’s elopement. He asked his brother-in-law to send him full powers to act in his name throughout the whole of the business. He informed that Mr Wickham’s circumstances were not so hopeless as they were generally believed to be and asked Mr Bennet to approve of all what had already been settled between him and Mr Wickham – to enter into an engagement of allowing Lydia, during Mr Bennet’s life, one hundred pounds per annum. At the end of his letter he added –

“There will not be the smallest occasion for your coming to town again; therefore, stay quietly at Longbourn, and depend on my diligence and care. We have judged it best that my niece should be married from this house, of which I hope you will approve. She came to us yesterday and almost already we noticed her unusual pallor and general weakness. Both Mrs Gardiner and I were quite anxious for her health so we found it necessary to send for a doctor. Mr Grant came here this morning and examined her properly. He expressed an opinion that my niece’s present state could be an inevitable consequence of her eloping and living with Mr Wickham more than five weeks. This consideration makes me wish even more eagerly the marriage between the young people to be concluded as soon as possible so, please, my dear brother, answer immediately. I shall write again as soon as any thing more is determined on. Yours, etc.

Edw. Gardiner.”

If the first lines of the letter produced relief then the last ones brought the deepest blush on both sisters’ cheeks. Miss Bennets could hardly find words to express their confusion and shame on hearing such tidings. Lydia was expecting a child! The news which under different circumstances could have excited happiness and delight, was now a source of shame and grief, for what the other proof of family weakness was necessary than Lydia’s present situation?

At length Elizabeth cried –

“Is it possible? Can it be possible that he will marry her?” and then, after some hesitation, “I thought he would ask more.”

“Oh yes,” Mr Bennet grinned sarcastically, “ I am ashamed of his asking so little. I had much better opinion of him.”

“ Wickham is not so undeserving, then, as we have thought him!'' said Jane. “It is a comfort to think that he has a real regard for Lydia.”

“Yes, it is a real comfort to think that he cares for her enough to marry her after their living together more than five weeks without the church blessing. But there are two things that I want very much to know: -- one is, how much money your uncle has laid down to bring it about; and the other, how I am ever to pay him.''

Jane began to protest against such a supposition with energy but Elizabeth after short deliberation decided that her father had been certainly right and said –

“If we are ever able to learn what Wickham’s debts have been, and how much is settled on his side on our sister, we shall exactly know what Mr Gardiner has done for them.”

There was so much to be discussed, and said, and understood, but then it occurred to the girls that their mother was in all likelihood, perfectly ignorant of what had happened. Mrs Bennet on hearing the news began to express her delight and joy as violently as she had previously complained. To know that her daughter would be married was enough. Her loud exclamations about dear Lydia and Wickham made her elder daughters blush. Mrs Bennet regained her former energy very soon and without losing a moment called on Mrs Philips, Lady Lucas and Mrs Long, spreading the news about Lydia’s soon marriage throughout Meryton.

Elizabeth felt al the advantage of the forthcoming event, she knew she had need to be thankful, but she had been persuaded that there would be neither rational happiness nor world prosperity in Lydia’s future life. Her imaginary affection for Wickham would not last long and she would hardly be able to find consolation and assistance in a person wholly unworthy respect and esteem. She could not imagine how Wickham and Lydia were to be supported in tolerable independence, and how they would live together without true affection and regard for only these sentiments could support them under such circumstances. And with more regret than before Elizabeth felt the loss of Mr Darcy and indulged herself in thoughts how perfectly they suited each other and how happy they could have been together.

The good hews quickly spread through the neigbourhood and all the spiteful old ladies in Meriton wished the young couple happiness and felicity with more eagerness than it could have been supposed, for they were persuaded that with such a husband Miss Lydia Bennet’s misery was quite certain.

Mrs Bennet was engaged in searching for a proper house in the neigbourhood for her daughter and future son-in-law, when Mr Benner received the next letter from Mr Gardiner, who informed that all the suspicions concerning Lydia’s state had been confirmed and though Mr Grant had found no reason for alarm, he insisted upon her staying in London and objected against any trips during next three or four weeks. Mr Gardiner also informed that Wickham had resolved on quitting the Militia and join the regulars for he has the promise of an ensigncy in General – ‘s regiment, now quartered in the North. Lydia wished to be admitted into her family again after her marriage but her present state of health prevented her coming to Longbourn and, though Mrs Bennet tried to persuade her husband to receive at Longbourn at least Mr Wickham, there she failed and Jane and Elizabeth, whose wish never to see Mr Wickham again and inclination to think that his place was now near his wife were equally strong, were quite satisfied with the plan. Mrs Bennet, unable to show her married daughter in the neigbourhood, became as nervous as before and her family began to suspect that her present fretfulness would last much longer than they could imagine, but the spiritless condition which this event threw her into was shortly relieved by the news which then began to be in circulation. The housekeeper at Netherfield had received orders to prepare for the arrival of her master, who was coming down in a day or two, to shoot there for several weeks. Mrs Bennet was all delight and contentment, she smiled and rose from her seat and shook her head. Her satisfied looks at Jane did not escape both eldest Miss Bennets’ notice and Elizabeth felt for her sister foreseeing all the inconveniences and uneasiness Mr Bingley’s return would inevitably bring. She was wild to know what his return meant, whether it had been just a wish to spend his time pleasantly without any designs or the consequence of his friend’s confessions resulted from their memorable conversation in Lambton Inn.

Miss Bennet had not been able to hear of his coming without changing colour, but when they were alone, she tried to persuade Elizabeth that the news did not affect her and she would be able to meet him without pain. Elizabeth did not know what to think. Had she not seen him in Derbyshire, she might have supposed him capable of coming there with no other view than what was acknowledged; but she still thought him partial to Jane. But the first object of her wishes was to know whether Mr Bingley would bring his friend or would come alone. Though she knew that she could hardly hope for his coming hither, she still cherished perhaps involuntarily very weak hope for his constancy. Her heart whispered to her that such a regard as Mr Darcy’s for her would not sink soon, but then she recollected the circumstances which had destroyed her every hope for happiness with him and tried to suppress the voice of her own heart. She wandered what his reaction to her letter had been, she longed to know whether he felt more displeasure or pain on reading it and whether, in defiance of everything, she was still dear to him.

Mrs Bennet tried, as a twelvemonth ago, to persuade her husband to wait on Mr Bingley, but this time all her attempts were vain and the only thing which could console her was her resolution to invite him to dine at Longbourn.

Mr Bingley arrived. Mrs Bennet counted the days that must intervene before their invitation could be sent; hopeless of seeing him before. But on the third morning after his arrival in Hertfordshire, she saw him, from her dressing-room window, enter the paddock and ride towards the house. Her daughters were eagerly called to partake of her joy, and Elizabeth, to satisfy her mother, went to the window -- she looked, -- she saw Mr Bingley alone, and sat down again by her sister. Mr Darcy did not come. She had nothing to hope for any more.

Jane looked a little paler than usual, but more sedate than Elizabeth had expected. On the gentleman's appearing, her colour increased; yet she received them with tolerable ease, and with a propriety of behaviour equally free from any symptom of resentment or any unnecessary complaisance.

Mrs Bennet received her unexpected visitor with a degree of civility which made her two daughters ashamed. Mr Bingley, equally animated and embarrassed, looked as a year ago, though his uneasiness was evident. Elizabeth, deeply wounded by Darcy’s absence, was at the same time by no means blind to Bingley’s behaviour towards Jane and with satisfaction which had softened her pain observed how much the beauty of her sister re-kindled the admiration of her former lover. Elizabeth had no other reason for pleasure, for her disappointment from Mr Bingley’s coming alone in the addition to the shame caused by her mother’s officious attention were impossible to be borne. At length she grew tired of endeavours to appear animated and pleased and to the end of Bingley’s visit she was so absent-minded and dull that she could be considered almost uncivil. She hardly paid any attention to their visitor’s words, though under different circumstances she would have been glad and pleased to be in his company. But she could think only of Mr Darcy.

Part Eighteen

Posted on Wednesday, 3 September 2003

When Mr Bingley was gone she left the room thinking it necessary to be alone to recover her spirits. She walked out and spent more than an hour in bitter and painful reflections. She blamed Wickham and Lydia for their shameful conduct which prevented her from staying in Derbyshire and enjoying company of the Darcys, she blamed Darcy for his overwhelming pride, though the next moment she grew ashamed of such feelings and thoughts, recollecting his conduct during her stay in Derbyshire. But most of all she blamed herself for being so bold as to hope for his return to Hertfordshire, so vain as to think herself able to make him propose twice. She began now to comprehend that she had made a mistake by writing such a frank letter to him, that he must have thought her thoughtless and imprudent. Perhaps, had she been able to know Mr Darcys real opinion on this subject, her shame would have been lessened and her pain softened, but as she had no such an opportunity her misery and melancholy can be easily imagined.

The lowness of spirits of her younger sister did not escape Jane and as soon as they were alone together she said –

“I perfectly understand why you are so quiet today, Lizzy.”

“Do you, Jane? I do not think so.”

“I know, Lizzy, you must feel very uncomfortable to see Mr Darcy again.”

“Mr Darcy?”cried Elizabeth, “What are you talking about? How is it possible?”

“Have not you heard Mr Bingley say that Mr Darcy will join him at Netherfield in three or four days? Some urgent business prevented him from coming earlier. My mother invited them both to dine here at any time they chose. But, Lizzy, if you did not know that, then why have you been so sad? I can not understand.”

Elizabeth had to make some exertions to hide her delight at the fact and answered something indistinct about her headache. After such revelations who could remain calm and indifferent? Elizabeth could not. When she was at length alone she was so overwhelmed with various emotions that she did not know whether to cry or to laugh.

Now every day for Elizabeth was a day of anxiety. She feared that some circumstances would prevent his coming, that there would be some earlier engagements, she was afraid of news, for it would mean the change of the plan. But most she dreaded to see him again. In spite of her delight, her eagerness to meet him, her agitation and embarrassment were still higher.

The fixed day of dinner at Longbourn came. A large party was assembled but the hostess most expected Mr Bingley on whom she had such anxious designs. Elizabeth, who half-dreaded, half-wished for the appearance of Mr Bingley, who would bring Mr Darcy with him or the report of his not coming, was all agitation. Soon her disturbance was relieved by the arrival of both gentlemen.

Mr Bingley was animated and cheerful, and when they repaired to the dining-room almost immediately placed himself by Jane. Elizabeth received pleasure from observing his behaviour, but it was the only reason for her cheerfulness at the beginning of the evening, for Mr Darcy, to whom she said as little as civility would allow, looked as serious and thoughtful as she had seen him in Hertfordshire and Kent. She could trace in him neither ease nor animation she had witnessed at Pemberley. To her regret, Mr Darcy was almost as far from her as the table could divide them. She was wild to talk to him, too see him smiling, though had she been placed by him, she had been convinced, she would hardly have found a subject for conversation. Ant yet, it pained her to observe cold and formal attitude of her mother towards him, for Mr Darcy was on one side of Mrs Bennet and at times she thought she would have given anything to have an opportunity of frank and open conversation with him, though she knew it to be impossible.

She was in hopes that the evening would afford some opportunity of bringing them together, and the period which passed in the drawing-room before the gentlemen came, was a real torture to her.

At length the gentlemen came. But the ladies had crowded the table where Miss Bennet was taking tea and Elizabeth pouring out the coffee, in so close a confederacy, that there was not a single vacancy near her. Mr Darcy stationed himself not far from her and the next time she glanced at him, he was engaged in conversation with Mr Bingley. Elizabeth could not conquer the temptation to listen to their intercourse. Mr Bingley inquired after some business in town which had delayed his friend’s coming to Netherfield and Elizabeth was rather astonished at the fact, for she was quite ignorant if Darcy’s being in London and was sure of his staying at Pemberley all the time since their departure. And also it came to her that Darcy preferred not to arise that subject, especially, it seemed to her, in her presence. But this suspicion did not prevent her from asking, when some time later he approached her –

“I hope, Mr Darcy, that urgent business which called you to town has been successfully concluded.”

Darcy seemed astonished but after a short pause replied –

“It has been concluded, indeed, but I can not vouch for its success.”

“Have you seen my aunt and uncle in London?” asked Elizabeth expecting to hear the negative.

“I had the honour of meeting Mr and Mrs Gardiner during my stay in town,” answered Darcy with some hesitation.

“Really?” exclaimed Elizabeth, highly amazed at the fact. “But where, pray, tell me! At the theatre, I suppose?”

He looked at her oddly as if her last comment was unpleasant to him.

“I called on Mr and Mrs Gardiner in Gracechurch Street.”

Elizabeth was all astonishment. Mr Darcy paid a visit to her aunt and uncle and in such a part of London, which she could hardly imagine, him capable to enter. Had Elizabeth looked at him at that moment she might have seen that he observed her with a mixture of pain and some amusement. It did pain Darcy to see her unhidden surprise, for it meant that she did not expect him to call on her relations , that she still thought him haughty and conceited. But at the same time the thought that he was able to surprise her in that respect, in some way amused him and he did his best to keep his countenance.

He stood by her a little longer but after having inquired after Mr and Mrs Gardiner remained silent and at last, not knowing what to say, walked away.

Elizabeth hoped that later he would join her but all her views were overthrown by seeing him fall a victim to her mother’s rapacity for whist-players and in a few moments after seated with the rest of the party.

Though Elizabeth had nothing more to expect from the evening, her spirits were not so low as several days before. A short conversation with Mr Darcy gave her much more to think about than she had expected. Mr Darcy had been in Gracechurch Street! It was difficult to imagine but then it came to her that he could have paid a visit during Lydia’s staying there and this thought brought an additional pain. She could only hope that he had seen neither Lydia nor Wickham. But the fact that he did visit her relations during his stay in London showed her that he did not think ill of her even after Lydia’s elopement and the following marriage with Wickham. And though she was unsure whether he knew of the marriage or not she preferred to think that he did. Was there any hope for her? Her heart whispered to her that she could hope and still she dared not. Such her thoughts were interrupted by her sister, who joined her, eager to discuss the evening and the visitors or, in other words, to talk about Mr Bingley. The following intercourse showed Elizabeth that her sister was much better satisfied with the evening and herself than Elizabeth.

“It has been a very agreeable day,” said Miss Bennet to Elizabeth. “The party seemed so well selected, so suitable one with the other. I hope we may often meet again.”

Elizabeth smiled at Jane’s apparent calmness and said –

“I am glad, Jane, that you are a mistress enough of yourself to talk of him with such a perfect indifference. I can only advise you to be not so very guarded when he will propose.”

Though Miss Bennet tried to object against such a presumption, Elizabeth did not let her sister persuaded her in her total indifference to Mr Bingley.

A few days after the dinner Mr Bingley and Mr Darcy called again. They sat with the ladies about five or six minutes only when Mrs Bennet entered into the most favourite subject of hers – Lydia’s marriage and her dear son-in-law. Mrs Benner was diffusive as ever in her praises on Mr Wickham, but this day a degree of her raptures made her daughters blush and Elizabeth had one more reason for uneasiness for all this took place in the presence of Mr Darcy whose disgust and abhorrence she could easily imagine.

“Such a charming young man!” exclaimed Mrs Bennet, “Such manners, such appearance! My dear Lydia is so fortunate to get such a husband! It is a pity that he has not so many friends as he deserves. Do not you agree, Mr Bingley?”

Mr Bingley, a good deal confused by this application, could utter only something unintelligible but Mrs Bennet found it a sufficient encouragement to continue in the same manner –

“I have never seen such a gallant young man in my life, except you, of course, Mr Bingley. Such happy and easy manners! He is so amiable and agreeable and always has some elegant compliments to say to everybody!”

Elizabeth, eager to turn her mother’s thoughts, at length entered the conversation –

“At times idle gallantry does not so please as others used to think.”

Darcy looked at her with amazement and said –

“Then, Miss Elizabeth, perhaps, you would enlighten us on the subject what could please a young lady?”

“I can not vouch for all young ladies, I can speak only for myself. I think that strong and generous character, sincere sentiments and, above it all, constancy in opinions and affections, could please every rational creature.”

“So you believe constancy the first benevolence in a person. Do not you think, Miss Elizabeth, that sometimes constancy mat turn into obstinacy and even into blindness which could lead to prejudice?”

Elizabeth could clearly see that nobody but them understood the double meaning of the conversation so she found id safe to continue –

“I have never professed such an opinion, Mr Darcy. When talking about constancy I did not mean blindness. Every reasonable person must be very cautious in judging other people and must realize that everyone can make a mistake. But if someone is sure of the justice of his preferences he must remain constant in his sentiments in spite of all obstacles.”

“To be true, Miss Elizabeth, I can hardly understand you. I remember hearing you the last autumn at Netherfield defend with a great energy inconstancy and yielding to requests and persuasions of others. And just a moment ago you have professed quite an opposite opinion.”

She understood that he alluded to the conversation which took place after Mrs Bennet’s visit to Netherfield to check her elder daughter’s health.

“In that case you really caught me, Mr Darcy. I really changed my opinion on the subject but then it means that you changed yours.”

“Yes, Miss Elizabeth, I am able to change my opinions, but all my feelings are unalterable.”

Mrs Bennet, impatient to leave Jane and Bingley alone, proposed their all walking out, but that day the weather was rainy and the offer was declined.

Soon Jane and Bingley became engaged in quiet conversation and Mrs Bennet very prudently decided not to interrupt them. Mary seemed engrossed in one of her favourite books, so Mrs Benner, Elizabeth, kitty and Darcy were to entertain each other. But Mrs Bennet engaged herself in observing the young couple, Kitty was to much afraid of Darcy to talk, and as for Elizabeth, though she was anxious to appear like herself, her mind was so busily occupied that she could hardly force herself to speak. Darcy, uneasy and grave, first did not know what to say and how to act. Desperately searching for a subject for conversation, he looked at Miss Mary Bennet and a most remarkable, as it seemed to him, idea crossed his mind. Perhaps, had he been able to see the title of the book she was reading he would have remained silent, but nothing prevented him from saying –

“Miss Mary, you seem so deep in reading your book. Would you be so kind as to read aloud to us?”

In two or three minutes he undoubtedly regretted what he had done for Mary, always happy to display her talents, read the first pages of the book which happened to be Fordyce’s Sermons with monotonous solemnity, which reminded Kitty and Elizabeth of their cousin Mr Collins. It was evident that Darcy had never had the privilege of hearing such a performer as Miss Mary Bennet and Elizabeth amused herself by observing the puzzled expression on his face. At last the torture was over and all the party was quite relieved. Soon it was time for the gentlemen to leave. Elizabeth watched them go with sorrow. She wished she had used all the opportunities she had to converse with Mr Darcy. She knew she would scarcely see him soon, she wanted to know his thoughts, his feelings, she wanted to be sure of his good opinion and sentiments. And though his comment on the constancy of his feelings did not escape her, moreover, it gave her an additional source of hope, she still could not be secure. Elizabeth would undoubtedly have been much relieved, had she known how unconfident and insecure Mr Darcy felt.

Part Nineteen

Posted on Monday, 8 September 2003

Darcy still had been wavering as to what he should do. Every moment spent in Elizabeth’s company he experienced different emotions. At times, some her words and looks gave him reason to hope, but the next moment he felt nothing but insecurity. He could, of course, reveal what he had done to save Lydia, but he did not want Elizabeth to feel obliged to him, he did not want her gratitude, he needed her love. She was the main reason of his resolving to discover Wickham and Lydia. He thought of Elizabeth leaving Derbyshire. He thought of her during the meeting with Mrs Young whom he swore never to see in his life again, he thought of her when he had to see Wickham, whom he always most wished to avoid. The thoughts of her helped him to endure all the troubles and mortification attendant on that wretched business. She was before his eyes while he was standing by Wickham at the church during the wedding, he imagined Elizabeth’s relief and happiness on hearing the news of a happy conclusion of her sister’s elopement and this thought added strength to him. And now, when all those tortures were over, when he was determined to win her affections, he felt so unconfident as he had never been in his life. His former vanity and self-consequence had died away, in the recollections of his conduct,, his manners, there was a constant source of self-reproach and regret, the more he thought, the more he felt the justice of Elizabeth’s accusations, and though he thought himself on a right way by somewhat improving his manners, he began to fear that in essentials he remained what he had ever been. He was afraid of being unworthy her despite all his fortune and consequence. Such feelings were unknown to him, but he did not suppress them, on the contrary, dwelt upon them punishing himself for his past mistakes.

He rejoiced in having the means of making some amends. He had already remedied one evil which was the result of his mistaken pride, though every meeting with Wickham which had been the inevitable evil of this business, was a torture to him.

He had almost forced Bingley to return to Netherfield for his friend first shewed such a firmness that Darcy had never witnessed in him before. He was determined to join his sisters in Scarborough and Darcy had to use all his talents of persuasion to make his friend act as he wished without revealing the real reason for his persistence. He knew that he ought to make a confession to Bingley which would offend him but after observing Miss Bennet during his visits at Longbourn he had no doubts of her attachment to his friend and this consideration made his confession not only desirable but also necessary. And he was relieved to solve at least one of his problems, for Elizabeth’s conduct still puzzled him and though he could hardly bear that suspense, at the same time he most dreaded to ask and to hear the negative. And he waited though he did not know for what.

A few days passed away and a large party were assembled at Sir William Lucas’s. Darcy on entering the room was pleased to find there Miss Elizabeth Bennet, though in the company of her mother and all her sisters. Determined to avoid Mrs Bennet, and especially Miss Mary, whose talents did amaze him on his last visit to Longbourn, he was resolved to seek every opportunity to converse with Elizabeth and to find out whether he might ever hope to obtain her affections. And this evening his hopes had been somewhat answered. He could talk to her about Bingley and Jane by hinting at his satisfaction at seeing them together and was rewarded with the luster of her dark eyes. Some time later he noticed several young ladies and gentlemen joined eagerly in dancing at one end of the room and he did what he ought to have done, as he understood now, at the assembly where they first met, - he approached Elizabeth and asked for the honour of her hand for the next dance.

Wit great satisfaction Elizabeth saw Bingley and Jane who were also dancing together and had she been able to read the thoughts of Mr Darcy, who at that moment admired the beauty of his pretty partner, her happiness would have been perfect.

That evening Elizabeth did her best to avoid the people who could spoil all her pleasure. She tried not to notice her mother’s loud remarks on a most animating subject – Jane’s soon marriage, to listen as little as she could to Mary’s “accomplished” performance, even Kitty’s flirtation with one of the young Lucases did not affect her. Had not she been so engrossed in her own thoughts she would undoubtedly have seen that Mr Darcy’s attentions to her did not escape the notice of the rest of the party and to the end of the evening almost all her neighbors instead of one wedding in the Bennets’ family had expected two. If Elizabeth had known what delightful schemes and projects had already been settled in her mother’s brains, her confusion and uneasiness could have been easily imagined, but while she remained ignorant of Mrs Bennet’s raptures on having soon three daughters married he could enjoy herself and her partner’s company.

Soon Mr Bingley and Mr Darcy called again and Mrs Bennet, who received both their visitors with complaisance and unnecessary attention, almost instantly proposed their all walking out. It was agreed to, though her daughters were quite amazed at the fact, for Mrs Bennet was not in the habit of walking. But soon their astonishment had been driven away, for Mrs Bennet had not intention to join the company. Mary could never share time, so the remaining five set off together. Jane and Bingley soon allowed the others to outstrip them and as they walked towards the Lucases, Kitty used this opportunity to call on Maria, or, in other words to get rid of the company of Mr Darcy of whom she was too much afraid. As Elizabeth saw no occasion for making it a general concern she went boldly on with him alone. Though first both forced themselves to speak, soon the conversation became more open and easy. Darcy told her of his sister, Elizabeth related some funny stories from childhood. At last they found that it was time to return, so they decided to wait for Bingley and Jane who lagged behind. They stood together on the lawn and after Darcy’s telling of his school years they began to discuss natural defects which education could check and acquired habits. With some hesitation Elizabeth said –

“I must confess, I have been used to laugh at follies of other people, but now I understand that often I acted wrong.”

Darcy looked at her with a slight smile.

“Miss Bennet, do not try to persuade me that you are dissatisfied with your disposition. I assure you, your wit is not a failure, it is the talent many people would like to have.”

And then, after a short pause he added –

“To my regret, I possess no talent of expressing my thoughts and emotions easily and may seem sometimes uncivil to those who are strangers to me. I can not feel at ease in company of people whom I have never seen before. These are my faults, indeed, so you may censure me, if you wish.”

“I am sure, Mr Darcy, that people who really know you would never think you uncivil. At least I can not find in you the faults you have just mentioned.”

“I hope, Miss Bennet, you will never change your present opinion of me, for as I know some people are able to alter their opinions quite often.”

Elizabeth caught the hidden meaning of his words but suppressed her confusion and asked boldly –

“Are you speaking in general or referring to some certain person?”

Darcy laughed heartily.

“Do you have such an excellent memory, Miss Bennet, or just remember certain expressions of certain people?”

“I hope, my memory is quite good, but I must admit that I do keep in my memory some most memorable expressions of people who are dear to me, especially long.”

Darcy gave her a very expressive look but said no word. The silence was very awkward. Both were sensible that it had been said too much to continue in a playful manner and at the same time too little for further confessions. At length they saw Jane and Bingley approaching them. The moment was lost and it was evident that there would be no opportunity for private conversation during this morning, but before they could be heard, Darcy turned to Elizabeth and said almost breathlessly –

“I hope, some day you will hear more memorable expressions which you would like to keep in your memory always.”

Elizabeth blushed violently and escaped the necessity to reply on Bingley and Jane’s approach. It was time to return and she wondered whether she would be able to appear calm and tranquil. On their way back home Jane joined her with such a bright smile on her face that Elizabeth could hardly doubt the meaning of it. Jane acknowledged with the liveliest emotion that she was the happiest creature in the world.

“It is too much,” she added, - “By far too much. I do not deserve it. Oh, why is not everybody as happy!”

Elizabeth’s congratulations were given with a sincerity, a warmth, a delight, which words could but poorly express. Every sentence of kindness was a fresh source of happiness to Jane. She related to Elizabeth that Mr Bingley would ask Mr Bennet’s consent this evening. Elizabeth rejoiced in her sister’s happiness and when they were joined by the gentlemen near Longbourn, she could see the similar satisfied smile on Darcy’s face and instantly understood that his conversation with Bingley did not very differ from hers with Jane.

It was an evening of no common delight to al the Bennets. Kitty simpered and smiled, and hoped her turn was coming soon. Mrs Bennet could not give her consent or speak her approbation in terms warm enough to satisfy her feelings, and when Mr Bennet joined them at supper, his voice and manner plainly shewed how really happy he was. But only after their visitors took their leave he congratulated Jane. Mrs Bennet’s delight was beyond expression. Lydia, Wickham were all forgotten, Jane was beyond competition her favourite child.

Part Twenty

Posted on Monday, 15 September 2003

The next day Bingley came in the morning and brought is friend with him. Elizabeth was rather astonished at the civility and delight with which Mr Darcy was received by her mother, for before she had expressed her displeasure at his coming at Longbourn too often. All the party was sitting in the drawing-room when their attention was suddenly drawn to the window, by the sound of a carriage. The door was opened and their visitor entered. It was Lady Catherine de Bourgh. She entered the room with an air more than usually ungracious, looked at the party without saying a word, at length fixed her eyes on Darcy and said in an angry tone –

“I did not expect to find you here, Darcy. A report of a most alarming nature reached me two days ago and I must talk to you on this subject immediately.”

Darcy, ashamed of his aunt’s ill-breading, knew it useless to reason with her. He was roused from his seat near Elizabeth and replied –

“If it is such a serious business, I think it reasonable to discuss it privately,” – and, addressing to the rest, “Would you excuse me, please? I have to leave you for some time.”

With these words he left the room with Lady Catherine while the others were to wonder and suppose the meaning of what had happened.

Darcy returned in half an hour, serious and silent, without any explanations, and the grave expression on his face prevented the rest from inquiries and unnecessary questions. He scarcely said anything during that short period of time he sat with them. Soon he went away leaving his friend in the company of his bride and her relations.

Darcy needed to be alone. His aunt’s coming to Longbourn a great deal surprised him, but his amazement at the reason of her journey hither was still much higher. That she came from Rosings for the sole purpose of breaking off his supposed engagement with Miss Elizabeth Bennet, of which he had never heard before, he could hardly believe. And still he knew it to be true, for it perfectly explained a sudden change of Mrs Bennet's attitude towards him, all the expressive looks of the neighbors, all those hints that did not escape his notice. He only wanted to know whether Elizabeth was aware of such rumors or not. His aunt came to obtain the promise from him never to enter into such an engagement, but she came in vain. Had she addressed him several months ago, she might have succeeded, for despite the offence caused by her manners and address, he would have acknowledged the justice of her reproaches. But now his notions of dignity and family duty had been changed and he began to comprehend that he must chose such a partner in life whom he could respect and esteem, that fortune and connections would not make him happy.

Lady Catherine was so violent in her abuses of Elizabeth, used such expressions that made him ashamed to have such a relation.

“You must leave this district immediately,” demanded her ladyship, “ Do not you know that such rumours have been industriously circulated by this mercenary girl and her family? Darcy, you must remember what you owe to yourself and all your family! How could you forget of your engagement with Ann? The other marriage will be a disgrace, you can not ruin yourself in the opinion of your family, you can not make yourself the contempt of the world!”

Darcy was sure that she would continue in the same manner very long so he had to interrupt her effusions harshly and rudely. Her Ladyship, quite dissatisfied and disappointed by her dear nephew, had to leave, though she still was unable to believe in such a result of her long journey.

Elizabeth did not remain ignorant of the reason of Lady Catherine’s visit very long for the very next morning she had a most animating conversation with her father who had just received a letter from Mr Collins with the intelligence of her ladyship’s displeasure at hearing of the supposed marriage between her nephew and Elizabeth. Mr Bennet was highly diverted by such a report, but his wit had never been directed in a manner so little agreeable to Elizabeth. First she was at loss to imagine from what the report of her engagement could originate but then she realized that it might have reached Lady Catherine through the Lucases’ communication with the Collinses. And now she most dreaded Mr Darcy’s learning about these rumours for his abhorrence she could easily imagine.

In two or three days’ time The Bennets dined at Sir William Lucas’s. As all the neighbors were aware of Jane’s engagement Bingley and Darcy were invited too. After dinner when the party were assembled in the drawing-room Sir Lucas, obliging and courteous as ever, approached Darcy with such an application –

“Your friend seems very happy, Mr Darcy. He will carry away the brightest jewel of the country. And as I have heard Miss Bennet is not the only lady who will leave us in the future,” – throwing a very expressive look at Elizabeth, who was standing not far from them, “ What congratulations will then flow in!”

Darcy, though extremely astonished, instantly understood the nature of Sir Lucas’s application. Then he saw that Elizabeth’s cheeks were overspread with the deepest blush and it became clear to him that she had somehow been acquainted with the rumors circulating in the neighborhood. He did not know whether most to be amused or displeased to be an object of such speculations. But he did rejoice in Elizabeth’s reaction for he observed in her neither disgust nor former dislike. He had been convinced that she certainly had not been displeased and this consideration gave him reason to hope as he had scarcely ever allowed himself to hope before. He was determined at once to know everything.

The very next day gave him such an opportunity. Mrs Bennet proposed a walk to Oakham Mount. Kitty preferred to stay at home so Elizabeth was to entertain Darcy while Bingley and Jane were talking to each other. Elizabeth had already been used to their tête-à-têtes but this time she had another source of uneasiness for she did overhear his conversation with Sir Lucas and now she was afraid of knowing his reaction.

Some time both were silent. She felt that he was often looking at her but she could not force herself to lift up her eyes. And when he spoke at length, she almost started.

“So, when are we to be wed, Miss Bennet?” asked Darcy in his usual sedate tone.

Elizabeth opened her mouth and looked at him, extremely astonished and confused.

“As I understood, all the neighbors set our union down as almost certain and immediate and only are expecting for the right time to wish us joy.”

He paused and looked at her expectantly. But she was silent and only was proceeding to stare at him in a most impertinent manner.

“I see, you are quite ignorant of such a report. But do not you think, Miss Bennet, that it is very ungenerous to disappoint our acquaintance? Perhaps, we should fix a day and let others rejoice in our felicity. But you are silent, Miss Bennet. What made you lose your common liveliness and boldness?”

At length she recovered a little and forced herself to speak –

“Do not trifle with me, Mr Darcy. It is very cruel of you.”

He immediately lost all his irony and, looking at her with tenderness and concern, said –

“I have no wish to trifle with you. I only tried to hide my own perplexity and fear, for I do not know what to do and what to say. Forgive me if I made you suffer. It was not my intention, I assure you, My life is empty without you. I know I made a lot of mistakes but do not punish me so far as to let me live without you." and then, after a short pause, he added, “Miss Bennet, if something changed since last July when we met in Derbyshire, tell me so at once. I can’t wait any more, it is too painful.”

Elizabeth was extremely embarrassed and her confusion did not made her very fluent –

“Mr Darcy, I must say that everything changed… no, not everything, but concerning my feelings … my feelings are those that make me…”

Darcy started and said gravely –

“I understood you, Miss Bennet. Your answer is no.”

At that moment Elizabeth felt that most of her confusion was driven away, she even dared to lift her eyes up to him.

“Mr Darcy, I know perfectly well that patience is not your benevolence so you do not need to persuade me on this subject. But I hoped that you would have patience enough to listen to my answer. But if you are quite satisfied with your one I will do no attempt to contradict.”

Now it was Darcy’s turn to blush.

“I apologize, Miss Bennet. It was really rude of me to interrupt you.”

He was silent for several moments, which seemed an eternity to her and then said in an emotional tone

“Would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

He looked at her with such sincere tenderness and warmth that she could not doubt any more. Elizabeth, overwhelmed with joy, which lighted up her face said with tears in her eyes –

“It would be honor to me, Mr Darcy.”

Her happiness was so great that she burst into tears and for a few moments could not speak another word. Darcy, whose delight was equal to hers, could not stand aloof and, taking her hand, said –

“Miss Bennet, nay, Elizabeth, my dearest, do not cry. I can not see your tears. Tell me what can I do for you?”

“You’ve already done everything. You made me so happy. I can not express my gratitude, my delight.”

“I may object against such your assertion for it is you who made me the happiest man in the world, it is I who must be grateful to you. But I am so happy that I do not want to quarrel even on this subject.”

Elizabeth smiled at him.

“Perhaps, we must content ourselves with the thought that we, with all our vices and imperfections, deserve each other.”

“I could hardly find some imperfections in you, for you will always remain perfect for me.”

Elizabeth laughed.

“It is gratifying to know that your affection made you somewhat blind to my defects. Though I am sure that time will reveal all my imperfections, I am quite satisfied with the present situation.” And in amore serious tone she added, “ It was time when I was so afraid of losing your good opinion, and now to know that you still care for me, that you did not stop thinking of me is much more than I deserve.”

“How could you doubt?” cried Darcy, touched by her confession. “I thought you knew me better, I thought you would not have any scruples regarding my feelings for you. I know I am not very good at expressing my emotions, but I will always make you feel how dear you are to me. You must promise me, Elizabeth. Do not doubt my affection, never doubt my love for you.”

What can I add? Darcy and Elizabeth got married in two months’ time. Despite the differences in their characters and tempers they cared for each other tenderly, and their mutual affection only increased from year to year. They suited each other perfectly, she taught him to laugh and to be laughed at and by his assistance she became more experienced and accomplished. Together they discovered the world anew sharing in troubles and felicity, supporting each other in periods of melancholy.

The Darcys spent a considerable part of their lives at Pemberley. Elizabeth loved her new home as well as Darcy did, and in their mutual love and admiration for Pemberley they both found an additional source of happiness. Elizabeth had never recollected her former prejudice and ill opinions and was heartily grateful to her husband for letting her know his real worth and learn to love him as he deserved. Darcy on is side, never forgot what he had almost lost due to his pride and hauteur and his attitude to his wife had always been all tenderness and kindness. Their true friends sincerely rejoiced in the perfect endless happiness of the couple whose marriage gave an example of a connubial union of equals.

P.S. In spite of all Darcy’s endeavours to hide the truth Elizabeth learnt about his role in Lydia’s rescue, though only three years after their wedding. Mrs Gardiner, quite sure of her niece’s good information of the whole story, told Elizabeth much more than she ought. So Darcy had to listen to many warm expressions of gratitude from his wife who had received another proof of his kindness and generosity. But this is quite a different story.