Section I, Next Section
Sequel to How to win the Heart of a Poet.
18 Years Ago…
Jane stirred in her sleep fighting the urge to wake up even though she was aware it was in the middle of the night. Listening to the soft breathing of her sister coming for across the room immediately made her feel safe. Elizabeth had agreed to move into her bedroom a couple of months ago and they turned her old room into a pre-teen paradise, but this was not the reason Jane had asked her.
Jane was afraid.
Afraid of the dark, afraid of ghosts, afraid of sleep. There were days when she could not stay in their old Victorian house alone because she was certain 'they' would know and find ways to let their existence be heard.
She had never seen anything to back up her claims. There were no apparitions standing in windows, no shadowy figures floating down the hall, and no rocking chairs moving by some supernatural force…but her ears told her not to rely only on the sight sense.
Stretching, Jane opened her eyes slowly so the pink glow of the two nightlights would not blind her. As her vision came into focus, a smile crossed her lips.
"Granddad Gardiner! When did you get here?" Jane excitedly sat up in bed.
"Just now, Janie. I wanted to tell you that I love you before I go to sleep." The old man beamed at his granddaughter. The influenza he had been fighting for a month showed no signs on his peaceful face.
"You look better. Should I wake Lizzy?"
Granddad Gardiner visits were always a special event for the girls. Living in Chicago, he wasn't able to be with them as much as he would like, but he did make numerous trips to Kentucky a year to shower attention and affection on 'his Baby's babies'. It was he who taught Jane how to play checkers, shuffle a slinky, and win at Gin Rummy. She knew Lizzy would want to tell him all about her latest feat on the mandolin he had given her and about the clubhouse she was building in the backyard.
"No, let her sleep. I want to tell you something important and I do not want you to forget it. Can you do this for Granddad?"
"Yes." Unaccustomed to Granddad Gardiner being serious, Jane paid particular attention to his words.
"I want you to observe Elizabeth closely for a while. If she starts acting differently, go and tell your father about it. This is very important, Janie. I need to be able to count on you." He looked her in the eye as he passed on his information.
"Yes, you can count on me. I'll watch Lizzy. Is something bad going to happen to her?" Panic was in her voice as Jane glanced over at her sister. Elizabeth had a dirty knee sticking out of her covers and her curly hair was a ratted mess from being stuck under a baseball cap all day. Nothing was ever 'wrong' with Elizabeth, and the only mischief that came to her was by her own doing.
"Just keep an eye on her. If she starts to act odd, tell your father. Don't worry, no one is going to harm her."
She nodded her agreement with an apprehensive expression.
"Janie, I have something else to tell you now that you need to know. Ghosts and Spirits cannot harm you dear child, but you need to stop being fearful of what you are. Nothing can touch you if you do not invite it in; this is the Universal Law. You are frightening yourself for no reason."
Jane lowered her eyes to her lap and thought about what he had just said. She was tired of being scared, but at 12 years old her fear was very real.
"Granddad, how do I make them go away?" Jane timidly whispered the question had been on her mind since she could remember.
"They are nothing to send away, I checked myself. Your house is not haunted." His voice held a reassuring tone that lifted the child's heart.
"Really?" Jane looked up but her Granddad was gone. She scanned the room looking for him, wondering how he was able to sneak out. A moment later the door to her room slowly creaked open and her heart began to pound. Was it Granddad coming back in? Maybe he was in the hall checking on something? Was it a ghost?
With sudden force, the door slammed open causing it to hit the wall. Jane jumped and let out a yelp waking Elizabeth from her sleep.
"What?" Complained her sister. "What!"
Jane's eyes were shut tight as she waited for Elizabeth to tell her what was in her room. The momentary relief from Granddad Gardiner's words was gone.
"Katt!" She heard Lizzy bellow. "Go back to bed you little runt. You can't come in our room."
"I tell Mama!" The two-year-old yelled back. "Jane, Lizzy is mean!"
"Stop it you two." Jane was both relieved and angered at the same time. "Kitty Katt, what are you doing in here? Did Granddad Gardiner wake you up?"
"Granddad is here? Where?" Elizabeth got out of bed and ran out of the room with Katt following right behind her. Jane threw back her covers and joined her baby sister on the stairs. Katt's little legs made her a slow climber, so Jane picked her up and carried her down. Katt took this time to tell her woes to a gentle ear.
"Lizzy is bad. Lizzy hit me. I tell Mama."
"Lizzy did not hit you and she is not mean. Emma Catherine Marie, lying is bad, and you are not a bad girl. Don't tell stories unless they are true."
Katt eyes went wide when she heard her full name being used. Every child in the Bennet household knew that when they called by the three names each was 'blessed with' in succession they had better listen. If an adult tacked on their last name, they were in real trouble.
"Lizzy is not mean. Sam-Mar is mean." Katt made a face to emphasize her point and Jane tickled her. Katt called Mary 'Sam-Mar' because she has heard Mary's full name being used so often when her mother was addressing her that she assumed that was Mary's name.
"Mary is not mean either, little one. Now, let's find Granddad then get back to sleep." Jane let her sister down as she wiggled out of her arms. The only light on downstairs was the kitchen, so they both went in that direction. Jane could hear her father's voice saying something to Elizabeth. He stopped when he saw Jane and Katt enter the room.
"Girls, what are you doing up? I was telling Elizabeth that Granddad is not here." In exasperation, Dale Bennet turned to his eldest daughter for an explanation.
"Jane?"
"I don't know Daddy. Are you sure?" Jane was certain she did not imagine talking to him.
"He is not here. You must have been dreaming again. Go back to bed girls, and take Catherine with you. We'll call the hospital tomorrow and check on Granddad."
Elizabeth turned around a shot Jane a 'ticked off' look before she walked out of the kitchen with Katt trailing behind.
"Elizabeth, wash your face before you get back into your bed." Dale called after her. She responded with a weak 'okay' and took Katt's hand to help her up the stairs.
"I'm sorry Daddy, I thought Granddad was here." Jane was always quick to apologize. It was disturbing to her that she had dreamed her grandfather's visit. It all seemed so real.
"Quite all right, Jane. Now, off to bed." Dale watched her leave the room. He wondered if she had overheard his wife's conversation with the hospital a half-hour earlier informing her of her father's deteriorating condition. It was possible, since Rose proceeded to have a nervous fit as she dressed to go down to the church to light a candle.
The call came less than 10 minutes later. Granddad Gardiner was with God.
22 days later…
"Shhh! You two are going to get us kicked out of the theater." Jane barked at Elizabeth and Mary. Their father had let them come to see 'The Muppet Movie' as a rare treat. The girls had been so upset since returning from their grandfather's funeral in Chicago he thought a distraction might be good for them. Dale left Jane in charge of her sisters while they were out of his sight.
"Jane," Mary whined, "Lizzy drank all of her soda and now she wants mine. I told her to go buy herself another, but she is too cheap to spend any of her own money!"
"Am not!" Elizabeth countered. The 14 months difference between Elizabeth and Mary was not enough. They argued constantly.
"I want something to drink because I am thirsty and I did not bring my allowance."
"Shhh. Lizzy, take my soda and Mary, leave her alone." Jane just shook her head in frustration as she listened to her sister drain the jumbo cup in five minutes. Jane would just have to get another during a dull part in the film.
"I have to pee." Elizabeth told her. "Can you move your legs?"
"Yes," Jane moved to let Elizabeth pass and reached into her pocket and pulled out a five-dollar bill. "Get me a soda to replace the one you drank."
"Okay, is this your money or daddy's?"
"Daddy's." Jane rolled her eyes, she knew Elizabeth was going to spend it.
"Okay." Smiling, Elizabeth made her way to the exit.
Returning several minutes later with two jumbo sodas, Elizabeth handed one to Jane.
"You're going to burst if you drink that." Jane's motherly wisdom was wasted her sister. Elizabeth poked the straw through the lid without listening.
Dale was parked outside of the theater waiting for the girls in the stationwagon after the movie ended. He was about to go in and retrieve his daughters when he spotted them exiting the building.
"Sorry we're late Daddy. I had to use the bathroom." Elizabeth grinned at her father to make everything better.
"You should have after all the soda you downed." Mary tattled. "She had three...none of which she bought with her own money."
"I was thirsty, so sue me." Elizabeth prepared herself to bicker with her sister on the ride home. They knew what it took to get each riled up.
"Girls!" Dale silenced them. "How did everyone enjoy the movie, Jane?"
"They were arguing, Daddy. I had to sit between them and Lizzy kept getting up and down to go to the bathroom. She couldn't get enough to drink. The show was good, though. I thought Miss Piggy was…"
Dale stopped listening as he sat through a green light at an intersection, coming out of his thoughts only after the car behind him honked their horn. Without realizing it, he interrupted Jane's account of the movie.
"Elizabeth, are you thirsty now?" He asked his daughter in an even voice.
"Yes, Daddy, and I really need to go potty. Can you drive faster?"
Dale felt his stomach drop.
"I will, but your mother is going to have to test something while you go to the bathroom. She will hold a little cup for you. Okay?"
"Sure." Elizabeth had no idea what he was talking about, but she wasn't one question her father's authority very often.
Jane looked over at Dale, noticing how stern and serious his face was. She remembered a time when she was younger and had seen him test his urine with a stick and a cup. Could he be thinking that Lizzy had the same problem he did with sugar?
"Daddy?"
"Not now, Jane. Let's just get home."
A week later Rose was back down at the Church lighting a candle for her second daughter who was lying in a hospital bed across town. She had inherited her father's diabetes and little did they know that the battle would be a long, hard one.
October 9 1998
Leaving Memphis…Together.
William and Elizabeth took turns driving her Suburban back home to Chicago from Memphis. The first four days of their reconciliation went well. In many ways it felt like it did between them before their separation, but there were still certain areas of uneasiness existing that only time would heal.
Yesterday, William noticed Elizabeth becoming distant, and today she barely spoke. He knew she surely had a great deal on her mind about returning home after so long, but she was not sharing her concerns with him so he could only guess at the cause of her disquiet.
Over and over he reminded himself she had not had enough time to adjust to them being together again, but he hoped it was not regret or uncertainty that was making her push him away. Last night she had a headache and went into her room alone to sleep. William could tell that she did not want any company and he let her be. Early this morning while they were packing her car, she wore an unreadable expression on her face and only spoke when she had something critical to say.
Elizabeth sat with her feet pulled up in the seat and her head resting on her knees. She glanced out of the window at an exit sign as they passed it.
Savoy. We are almost to Jane's.
"Elizabeth, what is bothering you?"
She turned at looked at William. He had been so patient and gentle with her for the last week.
"Oh, different things. Going home. It was so nice being away from everything with you and it just makes me think of what will be different when get to our respective homes and lives. You'll be back at work and I'll be looking for work-eventually. My father will be home soon, Jane is moving back to the area, you will be visiting your sister for Thanksgiving, and to top it all off, I have had a horrendous sinus headache for two days."
"Let's start with your headache. Do you still have one now?"
"Yes, it hurts to move my head. I ran out of sinus medicine and the pills I took this morning have worn off. " She gave him a small, painful smile. "This happens every spring and fall when the weather changes and it usually lasts a couple of weeks."
"You should have told me how bad it was. We'll pull off at the next exit and get you some more medicine." He reached over and rubbed her leg.
"I didn't want to spoil our last days in Memphis and I thought I could get the headache under control."
"I didn't know. I thought…" William decided not to say anymore because doubt was something Elizabeth was having a hard time dealing with.
"You thought what?"
"That maybe you were reconsidering…you know, about us."
"I'm sorry. I did not intend to give that impression. I haven't changed my mind, Will." She took his hand off of her leg and wrapped her own around it. "Once again, the 'awkwardness' makes an appearance. How long does this last?"
"I don't know." He answered honestly. "Maybe until we get completely comfortable with each other again. It will pass, that much I do know."
"I love your faith, it relieves me more then you can imagine." Elizabeth undid her seatbelt and slowly scooted next to him. She grimaced as she laid her throbbing head against his shoulder.
"As you know, I would like for you to join me in New York for Thanksgiving. Georgiana would like to meet you."
"If I think I can get away without offending Jane, I will. Tomorrow I'll call her and find out what date her move is. I really need to be home for this Christmas, though. Do you think you could stay in town and be with my father?"
"No problem." He grinned at her. It was nice to be making future plans with Elizabeth once again. "If Georgiana changes her mind about skiing during the holidays, she can just join us. But, I doubt she does. Now, what is bothering you about getting to our 'homes and jobs'?"
"Well…I have no job. Let's start there." Elizabeth teased him. "I have thought about asking Steven to give me something to do. He is running the company now and I have no intention of trying to get my job back. When I left the company, we both assumed his position would be permanent."
"You could always come and work with me. A person with your talents…"
"And what talents are those?" She kissed his shoulder. "Making out with the Boss?"
"No," he laughed, "although we should add that to your resume! I was thinking about your organizational skills, your business and management experience."
"Thank you, but I am going to have to decline. Nothing kills a relationship faster than working together. At least, in our case I believe that to be so. Can you really see me taking orders from you?"
"I hadn't really thought about that. Where I figured we might have the biggest problem was being professional in front of people while thinking inappropriate thoughts about each other."
"Oh, that too!" Laughing, she held the side of her head to keep the pain down. "William, I have really enjoyed our week together. I am going to miss seeing you every night before I fall asleep."
"Why do you have to? We were together every night before when we were both working." He hoped this statement did not make her feel pressured, but he could not imagine not being her everyday. Memphis had spoiled him and he liked seeing her before he fell asleep too. "Whenever you're ready, just let me know."
"Will you stay with me at my house tonight?" Elizabeth was ready to resume their full-time relationship at home.
"I would love to."
They were nearing Champaign and the area was familiar to Elizabeth. Newly constructed pricey homes were sprouting up on the once fertile farmland lending the area an unnatural 'community' feeling with its tiny trees and freshly paved roads.
Jane and her husband were some of the first occupants in this area and for a period of about two years, they had the grandest home built. But, six years later they found themselves being surrounded on all sides by even bigger and better. Eric had wanted to build another home but as their marriage started to fall apart he stopped mentioning it to Jane.
"William, if you look out to your left you will see the subdivision Jane lived in. Her house is further back so you can't see it from the road, but this is the location."
It was a nice area although a little bland to him.
"There is an exit coming up. After we stop and get you fixed up, would you like to go see your sister?"
"No, I don't like to drop-in on people." Actually, Elizabeth wasn't sure if Jane still lived in the house.
"She isn't people, Elizabeth, she is your sister." William's attachment to his own sister clouded his ability to understand that not all people were as close to their siblings as he and Georgiana were.
"There is a long story behind Jane and me, and if you will get me some extra-strength non-drowsy Sine-Off, I'll try to explain it to you."
"Do you want to tell me?"
"Yes, but I did and said some things I regret. So be prepared for 'Lizzy at her worse'."
"You have already witnessed me at my worse, so I doubt you can top that." William took the exit.
We'll see.
Elizabeth woke up an hour later with her neck on William's leg. She moved her head from side to side and smiled up at him.
"You are a medicine buying God, William." Sitting up, she gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Now, if you will pull over I will take my turn driving."
"Don't worry about it, I'll get us home. There is no reason for you to strain your eyes by driving."
"Thank you." Elizabeth wrapped her hand around his thigh and leaned against him. "Did I miss much while I was asleep?"
"Flat land, more flat land, and a couple of abandoned vehicles. Typical downstate Illinois."
"You must be bored. Shall I entertain you?"
William raised his eyebrows-intrigued.
"Not that way!" She laughed. "Oh, I remember, I was going to tell you about Jane."
"Are you up to it?" William did want to hear her story.
"Sure, just give me a moment to wake up all of the way." Elizabeth stretched her arms, opened a diet Pepsi, and settled back down in her seat.
"I think the place to really start is 1995, but I will slip back in time first. If I lose you, let me know and I'll clarify."
"Okay."
"First, I will refresh your memory on some details. As you know, there are five of us girls. Jane is almost two years older than I am, and Mary is only fourteen months younger. After an eight-year break, Catherine (or Katt as I still call her) was born. Three years later, Lydia came along. Lydia is still living at home and will hopefully graduate High School this year. I don't want to sound heartless toward my little sister, but I really do not like her. She is spoiled, selfish and wild. If Mama does not crack down on her, she is going to end up a statistic. I have tried spending some 'quality' time with her, but she only wanted me to give her money so I eventually gave up.
I talked to Katt last week and she is happy going to school in Seattle. I knew she would be, Seattle is a great city. Being away from Lydia and Mama is very good for her, too. She likes her independence and who could blame her? Katt is really an interesting young woman. I think you will like her.
You know about Mary and myself, so I'll skip us and move right onto Jane. Jane is some sort of Director at Carle Hospital in Champaign. She attended University of Illinois and graduated with a degree in Hospital Administration. Jane stayed in town while the man she married finished his law degree."
Elizabeth put her feet up on the dash and paused for a moment. The facts in her mind needed to be formulated and she had a decision to make about how detailed she would allow her story to be. It was not her own disguise which concerned her, but Jane's. There were certain particulars about her sister's life that she was not sure Jane would appreciate having William know.
"What are you thinking about?" He asked when he noticed her silence was becoming prolonged. William had an idea about what she might be doing and he wondered if she was going to edit the information she was about to share. In the past week he had watched as Elizabeth struggled in some of their conversations when the subject matter became too personal or painful. He knew she trusted him to a certain point and that she loved him. But her habit of protecting herself was difficult to overcome, just as his controlling his own curiosity was. They had made progress together, and as time went on he was sure they would be able to find a middle ground comfortable for both of them.
"William, there are some details about Jane that I am going to leave out. I do not have permission and it wouldn't be right for me to divulge some things without her knowledge. Do you understand?"
"I agree with you, Elizabeth."
"Okay, let me tell you about Jane."
Chapter 1 B
"Alexandra Jane Bennet was born a beautiful baby and as she grew, she became even more and more beautiful. When she was just under a year old, Mama entered her into one of those baby contests and Jane easily won. This small local contest was the beginning of many larger, grander beauty pageants she would participate in for many years to come. Jane is not competitive at heart, and could never lower herself to play the vicious games that the other children and their mothers often did in order to win. Jane won honestly on her looks, grace and talent.
As strange as this may sound, Mary and I were never jealous of our older sister. Since we were not born 'with the right look', we were not subjected to the same treatment Jane received on a daily basis. I was allowed to spend time outside with the neighborhood children, building clubhouses with real nails, playing softball and riding my bicycle down the dirt hills in our backyard. Mary was permitted to spend her days reading or tagging along with me when Mama thought she was becoming too pale. Jane on the other hand, was constantly reminded not to get bruises on her knees, too much sun on her face, or dirt under her fingernails. Everyone knew she was handsome, and Mama told Jane people also expected her to appear lovely whenever they saw her. Jane obeyed.
So, Jane was enrolled in dance class and she took piano lessons seriously while Mama had her hobby of 'Pageant Mother' to keep her happy. It was not until I was diagnosed with diabetes that this all came to a screeching halt." Elizabeth stopped to take a drink of soda before continuing.
"You were ten then?" William asked.
"Yes. My sister Katt was around two at the time. Between my adjustments, a toddler roaming the house, and later the arrival of Lydia, Mama just didn't have the time to continue anymore. Jane's dresses were boxed and put in the attic and she could not have been happier. When we were teenagers she finally admitted to me that she did not like the attention the pageants brought and was glad those days were behind her.
Jane, Mary and I were always pretty close. Jane and I shared a room and made mine into a playroom of sorts. We invited Mary to join us but she liked staying up late reading in quiet and didn't want us disturbing her. Jane was the typical older sister. She had to help out a lot when Katt and Lydia were born, and later when I became ill she would baby-sit while Mama and Dad would spend time with me. But, to know Jane is understand that she did find her lot in life difficult. She took her responsibilities seriously and never complained.
In High School and then into College, Jane attracted notice where ever she went. William, I am not exaggerating when I say that Jane is model perfect, not only in looks but temperament. She has a gentleness about her that is difficult to understand at times. People can take advantage of her without her noticing it, and although she will stand up for herself when pushed to the limit, her patience far surpasses anything Mary or I could ever hope to possess. She is the definition of goodness."
William frowned and turned his eyes from to road to Elizabeth.
"Then how could she have been estranged from you for so long?" Elizabeth was describing her sister as a saint, but he could not believe that their falling-out was all Elizabeth's fault.
"I pushed her to the limit." She answered quietly. "But to completely understand why I did what I did, you first have to hear about Jane's ex-husband, Eric Homman."
"During her junior year at U of I, Jane met and fell in love with a man three years older than she was. He was a student at the School of Law. Three months after they met, they were engaged and the summer between semesters Jane and Eric married. She finished her degree while he worked on his, and they seemed to have a good marriage.
I came to visit them back in 1992. Jane was trying to talk me into going back to college and wanted me to spend some time at the U of I campus. After about a week, I realized that Eric was not all he appeared to be when he was around my family.
The tone he used when speaking to Jane was harsh and cruel. One morning I overheard him telling her that she looked like she was gaining weight, and since he knew she could not be pregnant maybe she should consider dieting.
Jane had been trying for over a year to get pregnant without success. Obviously she was very sensitive about the subject and if you could have heard the way he said it, you would have known he did it on purpose. By the time I was able to get dressed and downstairs, Eric had gone to work. I talked to Jane for a good hour and she just covered for him and asked me to let the subject rest. I did as she requested, although I was not what one would call 'overly agreeable' toward him. This seemed to make him want to be nicer to me, and one night after Jane had gone to bed…"
William's jaw dropped and he began to pull the Suburban over to the side of the road. Elizabeth put her hand on the steering wheel to stop him.
"No, no, no! Although, the drunken a**hole had his own fertility problems to worry about that night after daring to come near me with the intentions he had. I erred the next morning as I left. I figured that somehow my being in their house was the problem. He was constantly comparing Jane to me, like I was some sort of an example of what she should try to be. I believed that if I were out of the picture, then whatever stupid infatuation he had developed would disappear and maybe their lives would get back into order. I was wrong and I should have told Jane what happened at that time. It wasn't an infatuation problem he had, but something larger. I was to later learn that Eric had many 'passions' during the course of their marriage—he was a womanizer.
I called Jane often during the course of the next few years trying to get her to talk about Eric. I expressed my opinions of him, but she would not listen. William, I had such a loathing for the man that I would not attend family holidays if I knew he was going to be present. Thankfully, Eric gradually stopped coming to them and by the time I had moved home, he never came up to Chicago.
In March of 1995, Jane called me at home. She told me Eric wanted a divorce and she needed me to come be with her. Should I happen to see Eric, she made me promise not to start any trouble because she wanted to see if they could 'work something out.' I agreed to her terms not realizing that they would be put to the test. Jane was a mess when I arrived, and for the next two days we talked and she began to settle down. Day three was when all hell broke loose-Eric returned with a change of heart.
I was gone at the grocery store when he arrived at their house, and he did not know I was staying there. When I got back to her house, I overheard Eric talking to her. For several minutes I just stood at the front door listening. Jane was giving him the adultery speech and she was holding her own quite well. From what I could hear, she was obviously not going to take him back.
Then the tables turned.
In a matter of a few sentences, he broke down her defenses with words like 'alone, by yourself, getting older, the Church, and family shame.' I came into the house enraged at the man and when I saw his arms gently holding her against his chest, I lost my mind."
With a hard, hateful look in her eyes, Elizabeth reminisced about the scene that had plagued her for so many years. She lost a sister that day and the pain of the confrontation was still powerful.
"What did you do?" William had witnessed her angry with him, but somehow he doubted that was anything compared to how mad she was at Eric.
"I went in and started to badger Eric with ugly words I am not going to repeat. He and I got into a vicious fight that went on for the longest time while Jane just stood there stunned. He told me to mind my own damn business and that I had no right to pass judgement on anyone because I was the furthest thing from a Saint he had ever met. I told him what I thought of his infidelity and the pathetic mind games he played with my sister. We continued to attack each other's character until Jane made us stop. Then, I forced Jane choose between us."
"Eric won."
Chapter 2 A
Tuesday
November 3 1998
8:50 a.m.
Homecommings and Adjustments
Charles Bingley opened the door to his office and inhaled a deep breath. Better! The odor from the freshly painted walls had dissipated and there was only a hint a carpet glue left in the air. Tomorrow he would begin welcoming patients into the three rooms he now possessed at the Elgin Medical Center, along with a fresh receptionist and a new partnership with five other psychiatrists on the mental health wing.
He had started out fresh before, and although he held no reservations about returning to the Chicago area, there was still a slight trepidation involved with the change in general. Detroit had been his home for the past three years and he left the area with a heavy heart and mind, but it was time for him to return to his roots and family.
Some of the best experiences of his life had been working at the dinky little state-run clinic in Michigan. There he was able to reach out to those who had needed him most and witness changes coming about in children who had previously been written off by society as 'hopeless cases.' It was an ugly job that carried with it a turnover rate of ninety percent. Very few people had the stomach or drive to last long in a post where the circumstances were as bleak and depressing as what he went to five days a week. His patients were the poor children brought to him by Social Services. More often than not, they were ordered by the court to attend visits at his office and Charles would have to spend several sessions breaking down barriers and earning their trust before any progress could be made.
A few of his cases did leave permanent scars. The faces of the children he could not reach occasionally flashed through his mind as a humbling reminder of his own capabilities. A young girl named Tanya had been his toughest personal defeat, and just hearing the name would stop him every time. Eight months ago he was so certain she had made progress and when he released her from his care, it was done with confidence. Charles had worked with her three days a week for over a year pealing back layer after horrifying layer that made up her existence. Simply put, Tanya had been through too much in the short twelve years since she had been born. It only took one more trauma to send her over the edge. An incident in her school's bathroom proved to be the turning point and two days later Tanya ended her life. A part of him would always feel responsible for her death and Charles knew he would never get over the little blond girl who rarely smiled.
Charles walked back to his office and began unpacking the final box left from the day before. The new receptionist Marilyn had already proven herself to be an efficient and looking down at his appointment book, he realized there would not be as much settling-in time as he had wanted. Four appointments were already booked for tomorrow. Next to the book was a message that William Darcy had called.
It was at his grandmother's suggestion that Charles had given him a call to renew the acquaintance and last weekend they spent an afternoon of easy conversation at Charles's home. William was different from the last time Charles had seen him and he was pleased about the changes evident in his friend. He was happy, really happy and some of that might be attributed to his girlfriend Elizabeth. Observing William while he spoke, Charles was certain he was serious about her and possibly in love. Willian in love? Who would have guessed?
Everyone who knew the two of them always assumed it would be Charles who would be the first married. But, somewhere between graduating high school and getting his medical degree, he had lost track of time. Charles's dedication to his study had somehow come before anything else in his life, and socially he had a hard time remembering the last time he had had a relationship with a woman that went past three dates.
Charles had not planned to go through life alone. In fact, until last weekend he had not given it much thought at all. His life was fulfilling; he made friends easily and did not have trouble finding a date when time permitted. He just had not found the 'right' woman yet. When the illusion of Ellen being that person shattered, it dulled his motivation to look for anything close to permanent.
At least William had had better luck in the romance department and he was anxious to see what sort of woman could impress his friend so much. The wait would not be a long one since Elizabeth was hosting a birthday party for William on Saturday and he was invited.
Charles took the remaining items out of the box. The framed picture of his Grandmother and him at his graduation was placed on the desk. Although he refused to display his diplomas in his office, the picture was a reminder of the day he was officially granted the title of Doctor. Medical school did not come overly easy for Charles, but he gave it everything he had because he knew he would be a good psychiatrist. Willing to study longer and harder than most students, he graduated with honors and was now was living his dream because of the effort.
"Good morning, Dr. Bingley." Marilyn stood in the doorway smiling affectionately at her new employer.
"Good morning Marilyn, and please, call me Charles." Smiling, he raised his eyes to the older woman. It was obvious he had found a jewel in Marilyn. She was bright, punctual, and cheery. Starting tomorrow he would be able to see how she held up as the waiting room became active.
"Charles!" She grinned back. "I'm 'old school' so it may take me some time before my habits change, but I will try." Marilyn walked over to his desk to peer down at the appointment book but the picture he had just unpacked caught her attention.
"If I may ask, is this a picture of your mother?"
"No, my grandmother Lillian." He smiled as he looked at the woman in the photo. Lillian was the only member of his family who came for the ceremony, and they celebrated afterwards as if they were 20 people. Charles loved her more than any other person in the world and felt he owed everything he was to this one woman. She was his closest confident and strongest supporter, and he had inherited her gentle strength. Lillian was the only person who knew everything about what happened with Ellen. She stayed by his side during his darkest days as he slowly came to terms with it, and gave him the motivation to get back to his studies when all he really wanted to do was give up.
"You'll get use to her voice on the phone," he told Marilyn. "Grandmother has a very strong accent and she calls me 'wnuczek'." (grandson)
"She is beautiful. Charles, I was stopped in the hallway by Dr. Bailey's secretary. She was wondering if you could take on some more overflow from their office tomorrow. It would be two more new clients that are high priority."
Charles dropped his eyes to his sparse appointment book. It looked like he was going to be jumping into a full schedule after all.
"That's why I am here," he said without much enthusiasm. "Could you see if they would be willing to take late afternoon appointments?"
"I will. Let me make a few calls and then I will update your book." Marilyn bustled out of the room and went about her work.
"Thank you." He called after her as he sat down in his chair and opened the chart of tomorrow's first patient. It was time for Charles to get to work.
Chapter 2 B
7:20 p.m.
Elizabeth slammed the kitchen door behind her as she came into the house. The scowl apparent on her face lightened a little as she noticed the kitchen table set for dinner. Walking over to the stove and lifting the lid on a pan cured her curiosity as to what they were eating tonight.
Chili…again. Dear, sweet man. I need to teach him how to cook something else. A brief grin appeared on her lips. William had been raised in a home with a cook, housekeeper and gardener, yet he eagerly joined in doing domestic tasks at her house. He could cook Chili and eggs, load a dishwasher, hit the hamper half of the time and make a bed like a Marine. The weekly visit by the cleaning woman took care of the more undesirable jobs around the house, leaving them free at night and on the weekends. Elizabeth was still not working and she could have done the dusting etc. during the day but there were just some duties that were worth paying for.
"William, I am home," she yelled into the living room, not seeing him come around the corner.
"I know, I heard the door," he gave her a kiss on the cheek, "how was it?"
"Mmm." Elizabeth growled. "If you'll dip us out some dinner, I'll go check my sugar and then give you the details of my afternoon at Jane's."
Elizabeth returned a few minutes later and leaned her head down to kiss him properly before they ate.
"Hello. I am so glad you are here. I'm sorry about being grumpy."
"Don't think about it." He pulled her close and kissed her like he did every day when he came 'home' after work. William did not officially live there, he just happened to never go to his own home…except to get clothes and check the mail. In the three weeks since returning from Memphis, Elizabeth and William had grown closer than they were before, and there was not a doubt in their minds that this was the way things were going to remain. Neither had walked out as they lived through their first real argument last week and the disagreement only strengthened their bond once it was over.
Elizabeth pulled away and sat down in her chair. "How was your day?"
"Pretty typical." William grinned at her. "Jack Barnes is leaving the company like I thought."
"Oh, that is too bad, you told me he was a dang good manager." She grinned back. A discussion over Jack Barnes and his position was the starting point of the disagreement they had had the week before.
"He'll do well in Indianapolis. Now tell me, what happened at your sister's?"
"Mama and I both showed up at just as the movers were leaving. At first I thought I had the address wrong because the apartment building wasn't all that nice, but it was correct. We helped Jane unpack and took a break for lunch. Jane and I didn't have much of a chance to talk since Mama kept rambling on and on about everything she took out of the boxes. I could tell Jane's nerves were getting on edge so about three in the afternoon, I reminded Mama about her woman's bible study group, and she went home to get ready."
William looked over his shoulder at the clock. "It's 7:30 now, so you two had some time alone."
"Yes. William, it was the strangest thing. Jane is…" Elizabeth searched for the right word, "different? I don't know, she just isn't like I knew her."
"What do you mean by different? Was she rude?" He knew how important it was to her to make up with Jane and he was hoping she would come home all smiles but it didn't happen.
"No, not rude, it was more like she was lifeless and quiet. As soon as Mama was gone, I apologized to her and we talked for a while about what happened a few years back. I admitted I was wrong when I butted into her personal life, and she said that she now understood what I was trying to tell her about Eric's manipulations. Then she filled me in to what has been going on in her life while we were not communicating. I didn't know this because Jane didn't announce it to the family, but she has only been divorced since June. "
"I thought she filed for divorce two years ago? Surely it doesn't take that long."
"It did in her case. We must remember Eric is a lawyer. Jane told me he fought her on everything. He represented himself so time and money was not an issue for him. Her lawyers went to the judge to protest the delays, but the judge sided with Eric. What could she do? Eric was on good terms with every judge in the county; he golfed with most of them. He made Jane out to be the greedy, impatient Chicago outsider. She wouldn't give me all of the details, but I think her inheritance is pretty much gone."
William frowned at Elizabeth's last statement. "Impossible. Lawyers don't cost that much!"
"It wasn't just the lawyers, Will. There were other factors. When they married, Jane put her money and stocks into both of their names without consulting anyone in the family. Eric made several bad investments with a huge chunk of her money; they built their house and proceeded to live way above their means while they were married. I didn't ask her how much she had left, but whatever it was, it was split down the middle when they divorced." Elizabeth shook her head. "It makes me ill to think of Eric having half of the money my dad had set aside for Jane. "
"This is the best her lawyers could do? Elizabeth, I know people who may be able to recoup some of her losses. Your sister should not have to settle for this. I can make a few calls and…"
"Don't waste your time, honey. I already suggested the same thing to her. Jane doesn't want to fight Eric anymore. She said that there is no amount of money to make it worth the hell she would put herself through."
"I disagree. This isn't only about money, but justice. He should not get away with dragging a divorce out for so long."
"You and I are thinking along the same lines. When I told Jane almost the exact same thing you just said, she snapped at me to drop the subject. William, I'm going to do as she asked, you know what happened the last time I interfered when she asked me not to. Who knows, maybe after she has had some time to adjust she'll change her mind. You cannot imagine how much I want to rip that worthless ex-husband of hers to shreds, but revenge will not bring my sister back."
William gave her a curious look.
"The Jane I knew was not the woman I saw today," she said honestly.
"How else has she changed?"
"It's like her spirit has been broken." Elizabeth let out a slow breath and gave a forced smile to William. She was beginning to wonder if she was over reacting.
"I caught her yawning several times, so maybe she just over tired today. There is a chance my own uncomfortable feelings shadowed how I saw the situation. You'll get to meet her Saturday when she comes to your party. I hope you get a different impression other than the one I gave you. Jane was always the sweetest person and she has a heart of gold, I am certain you will like her very much. Everyone likes Jane. She is a gentle, passive, demure woman."
"Hey You! Buddy!" Jane yelled out of her car window as she fought to roll it down further. "That is my parking place. 11B. Move your car!"
An overweight 20-something man turned around to see who was honking their horn at him. A pretty woman in an expensive Volvo had her head stuck out of her window and she looked really ticked off. She was pointing to a sticker on the upper left-hand corner of her windshield that the apartment complex gave her.
"I'm 11B."
"Sorry Ma'am." The man answered. There was no way he was going to fight her on the issue. She looked like she was out for blood. He tossed his bag from Computer City back into his broken-down Toyota and wedged himself behind the wheel. As he was backing out, he caught site of her in his rear view mirror giving him a threatening look. Gee, I'm moving my car as fast as I can!
Jane pulled in right after he vacated her spot and locked her car after she got out. She knew it wasn't in her best interest to pick a fight with a neighbor on her first day of living in the area, but there was no way she was going to let that kid think he could park in her spot. Deciding to check her mail, she walked to the area under the stairwell where the mailboxes were located. She set her shopping bags from the health food store down and found the key to open her box.
It would not open.
While Jane was fiddling with the lock, the man she had just accosted came up beside her to check his own mail. He glanced at her and realized right away what she was doing wrong. After a moment's hesitation, he addressed her with little confidence.
"Ma'am, if you push on the door while you turn your key, it should open."
Jane turned her head and looked at him with a blank expression before trying out his suggestion. He was right. She collected her junk mail and closed the door.
"Thank you, and the name is Jane. 11B." She offered him an outstretched hand.
"Chris, 11A." He shook her hand as he awkwardly balanced his mail in the crook of his arm.
Jane looked at the magazines he had just received.
"I see you like computers, Chris. Do you work in the industry?" Her voice was just friendly enough to take some of the fear out of his eyes. Jane really didn't mind that he appeared frightened of her, it was rather comforting. She wouldn't have to worry about him taking her parking space again.
"Yes Ma'am...Jane, I'm a Java programmer. Do you program?" Chris's nervousness was subsiding a little. He wondered if this lady knew he was directly below her apartment. Better watch the noise level from now on. I don't want her coming down on my case.
"No, I have a sister who is a programmer."
Chris's eyes brightened. Nothing in the world pleased him more than to talk techno with people.
"What language does she write in?" His question showed genuine interest.
"Several, but I don't know the names. She writes something called PC applications." Jane actually had no clue as to what Mary did. She explained it to her many times, but the terms didn't stick.
"Oh." Chris interest faded as quickly as it came. It was nice to meet this lady but if she didn't have anything interesting to say, there was a new episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on tonight and it was his turn to take notes for Buffy Chat afterward.
"Well, Chris, Thanks again."
"Sorry about your parking spot." Chris said quickly as he turned around.
"Bye." Jane watched him go to his apartment door. He is under me. Good, I'll know where to complain if the music is too loud.
Picking up her grocery bags, she made her way up the stairs to the second floor and into her new home.
After putting her no-fat food away, Jane stood in the middle of her dinky living room and glanced around at her apartment. Her expensive custom-made furniture looked out of place against the stark off-white walls and brown carpet. Content would not be a word used to describe Jane's current mood and when she tripped over a box on the way to her spare bedroom, she let out a few curse words to express her displeasure. Jane Bennet did not normally curse, Elizabeth cursed, Mary sometimes did, and heaven knows what her younger sister Lydia said when she was out of earshot…but Jane did not curse.
The bedroom suite in my old house was bigger than this entire retched place. What a pit!
The extra bedroom was packed full of her belongings and she could not imagine how she was ever going to be able to go through the boxes. Instead of tackling the job, she closed the door and went into her bedroom. It had been a long day and all Jane really wanted to do right now was to go to bed, even though it was only 7 p.m. This was the only room that was totally unpacked, and she had to listen to her mother's continuous stream of babble to get it that way. Wishing now she had just done the set-up herself without any help, Jane thought back on the day as she rested her head on a pillow.
She was mortified about Elizabeth offering to lend her money, surely she did not look that desperate because she wasn't. Jane still had a small nest egg set back for emergencies--small being the key word in comparison to what she started with eight years ago. Still, it was more than most women had after going through a divorce. Jane also had skills, excellent references, and her degree. All she lacked right now was the motivation to even think about going out and searching for work.
Jane had been seriously contemplating taking some time off until the beginning of next year. Elizabeth was not working right now either, although she had mentioned she was making up some sort of organizational training plan for her boyfriend's company. This may be a good chance for the two of them to get to spend some time together before her father came home in December.
Elizabeth hadn't changed all that much. Her personality was softer now then it was four years ago, and physically she looked great…thin and healthy. When she asked her about her weight, Elizabeth explained she had dropped some weight while she and William were broken up and she was having a difficult time gaining it back. The alarms went off in Jane's head when she heard this. She did not want her sister to make the same mistakes she did, and Jane clearly saw her headed down the same path. If she had learned nothing else from her time while she was married to Eric, it was that no woman should ever 'loose herself' to a man.
As usual, Elizabeth didn't readily offer her much personal information, but Jane was wondering if she quit her job because of this William guy. If she did, Jane would have to set her down and lecture her until she penetrated her thick skull. She was not about to stand by and watch her sister become a second class citizen to the whims of another person. Unluckily, Elizabeth was in love, and as Jane knew all too well that people who 'think' they are in love usually don't use the reasoning part of their brain. She was walking proof and it was a lesson she never wanted to see repeated by any of her sisters.
Saturday she would find out for herself what was going on at Elizabeth's house and until then, she would pay close attention to anything her sister said and did.
Jane got up from her bed; the tiredness she felt only a few minutes ago was drifting away. She looked in the full-length mirror at herself and shook her head as she pulled her shirt tight against her stomach. I've gained a couple of pounds. Why can't I have an over-active metabolism like Lizzy? Maybe I should check into her diabetic diet…it keeps her slim. She stepped on the scale she kept next to the mirror.
117 lbs.
2 pounds like I thought. Jane changed into her exercise clothes and turned on the treadmill. She set the speed for fast jog and began her workout. On her 5'6'' small-boned frame, 115 lbs. was underweight, but when Jane looked into the mirror she saw a distorted reflection.
When she was younger, it was her mother who harped on her about keeping herself beauty pageant perfect at all times. She never left the house unless she was looking her best and rarely engaged in activities that would spoil her appearance. While her other sisters were eating cookies and digging in the dirt, Jane stayed indoors as her mother coached her on how to match nail polish to her skin tone and the proper way a lady sat and walked. The words and guidance were still with her even after she was freed from participating in the beauty contests. It wasn't until her college years that she began to lighten up on herself and not be so uptight about perfection. Then she married Eric, and the comments and criticisms began again.
In the beginning he would occasionally tell her when he noticed a change in her body, but towards the end of their marriage he was rather regular about it. Although he never came right out and told her she was fat, it was indirectly implied often. Jane, are you pants getting a little tight? Do you need to go buy yourself a larger size? Did you see how thin that actress was? I think she looked good, didn't you?
It wasn't only her weight he addressed, but every other feature he felt was a little off. Eric found her first gray hair, and suggested she start using eye cream when the faint lines of crow's feet beginning to develop. Sometime during their years together he realized her insecurity about her appearance and took full advantage of it. He wanted his wife to appear flawless in public because you never know whom you were going to bump into while you out. After all, Jane was an extension of him.
Jane believed every word Eric told her because she could see the flaws too. She wouldn't skip meals since that would be bad for her muscle tone, but she would add time to her daily workout or adjust her diet to accommodate her goal. Obviously eating out for the past two days had been the culprit of her weight gain, and she would simply have to work a little harder to maintain her ideal weight.
…And Jane ran like the wind.
Chapter 3
Saturday
November 7 1998
5:45 p.m.
A Party and An Introduction
Jane drove her car around the corner and pulled up in front of Elizabeth's house. The last time she had been here was right after Elizabeth had purchased it. The entire family had gathered and helped her clean it up before they carried her boxes in. Elizabeth had put on festive music and served them stew she had made in her new kitchen. All five sisters posed on the porch for a photo when they were finished, and Elizabeth made copies made for each of them as a 'thank you'. Not another group picture had been taken since that day, and Jane kept hers framed on the nightstand next to her bed. There were times during the past few years when she would just look at it and recall the laughter they all once shared.
Eric had not joined her for the housewarming, citing the need to stay in Champaign to work on an important case he was representing. She tried to reach him several times that Saturday morning, but to no avail. Maybe it was a good thing since Jane had an idea where he was whenever she could not find him.
She enjoyed her day in Elizabeth's house anyway. It was nice being a Bennet again, even if it was just for the weekend. Missing her family was an ever-present state of mind during her time downstate. Eric had promised her they would move back to the Chicago area one-day, but with each passing year she began to realize he did not intend to keep his vow. He liked Champaign-Urbana. Having made a name for himself in the area as a ruthless young attorney who would fight to the bitter end for his clients, he held a celebrity-like status at the Club. Status was very important to Eric. Everything in their lives had to have the appearance of impeccability, and between Jane's looks and angelic personality, he was pleased with her performance most of the time.
Early in their marriage they had sunk a large portion of Jane's inheritance into building an enormous home at the Country Club. Decorators were called along with landscapers, architects, and furniture designers. Every article involved with the house had to be absolutely top rate. Thinking back on it, Jane could not help but to cringe remembering the amount of money spent on imported bathroom tile alone. The remaining inherited money was invested carelessly, but Eric's income when combined with hers made living in such luxury relatively easy and they did not think of the future. And so went their life…they pretended and entertained and vacationed and lived. Eight years passed quickly and then the charade ended suddenly.
It had taken longer than expected for Jane to sell the house in Champaign, and not until she was willing to take a loss on it did she finally receive an offer. Unluckily, loosing money on the home was only the tip of the iceberg as she found out after the Lawyers settled the divorce details. Jane was left with very little to call her own. Other than some money, half of the furniture and her car, nothing else existed for her efforts.
How she wished she had done things differently, starting with protecting her assets, but this type of self-preservation was not in Jane's personality. She believed and trusted her husband in the beginning. He was the one with the vision.
When his philandering became obvious, she looked the other way and continued on. When his personality became critical toward her, she improved herself to live up to his standards. When he told her that they would have to cut back on some of their unnecessary expenses to keep themselves in check, she adjusted her spending to compensate. When he told her that he was in love with another woman, she divorced him.
Jane stopped herself from thinking about Eric. It put her in a bad mood and she was here tonight for a party. Most of her immediate family was coming, along with a few cousins and some of William's friends. She still had not forgotten the promise she made to herself to check out the situation between Elizabeth and William.
Getting out of her car, Jane gazed up at her sister's house. She couldn't remember what time Elizabeth told her the party started, so she decided to come early and help her with anything she needed. There were only a few lights on downstairs. Looking up she could see Elizabeth's bedroom brightly lit. A shadow passed in front of a thin veil of a blind, and Jane watched for a minute to see if it was her sister or not.
A story began to unfold before Jane's eyes….
Elizabeth came into her room squinting due to the amount of lights William had on."William, why do you…" she stopped when she saw him standing on the bed with a hammer in his hand. Hanging on the wall over the bed was the birthday present she had given him, and seeing where he chose to display it took the rest of her words away.
"Is it all right here? You said 'anywhere I wanted'." She nodded her head in agreement. "Did I hang it straight?"
"I think so, Will." Elizabeth moved over by the window to get another angle. "Perfect!"
William got off of the bed and joined her to see how his present looked hanging up. If he were to rank every birthday gift he had ever received, this one would definitely be number one on his list. William turned to face her, holding her head with his hands as he kissed her. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she pulled herself up as high as she could. He was a foot taller than Elizabeth, and she could only stretch so far. Laughing, he picked her up and twirled her around a few times before deepening his kiss.
They were truly in Bliss.
November 5th was his actual birthday, and he had taken the day off from work to spend it with Elizabeth. She woke him up in the morning with a large, flat wrapped package in one hand and her guitar in the other.
The gift was a framed and matted poem. As he examined it closely, it became instantly clear that it was poetry written in calligraphy for him by Elizabeth.
"Elizabeth…" he was speechless after reading it. "You wrote this poem for me?"
"Yes," a blush came to her cheeks, "actually, it is a song I wrote a couple of weeks ago."
All of the love he felt for her was evident in his eyes. The gesture was of the most personal sort and his sweet Elizabeth was looking shy and embarrassed sitting next to him on the bed. He set the gift aside and pulled her close to him.
"G-d, I love you," was whispered at he thanked her with a tender kiss. She would never really be able to understand how much she meant to him because he loved her more than he could explain.
"William, it still scares me to think that…" a sob escaped from deep in her chest. Elizabeth still had a hard time remembering how close they were to loosing each other forever. "We could have just as easily not been here, together, today. If I…"
"I know," he answered, "but we are. Let's consider it a lesson learned and not think of the 'what ifs'." He held her even closer for a while. "Will you play me the song?"
"With pleasure." Elizabeth sat up and grabbed her guitar.
"Do you need the words?" He picked up his gift again.
"No, I know them by heart."
"I have something for you. I'll go get it." William put her back down on the floor with a twinkle in his eyes before he went over to the dresser he used and opened the top drawer. Pulling out a black velvet thin jewelry box, he returned to his previous position in front of the window.
"In the inscription under your poem you wrote 'May Saint Christopher protect and keep you when I am not close.' May he do the same for you." He handed her the box. Inside was a gold St. Christopher medal on a thin chain.
"Thank you," she whispered without looking up.
William took the necklace out of the box and put it around her neck.
Jane could not move. For some reason, the shadows showing through the blind in the upstairs window were tearing her heart apart and she did not understand why. When the two silhouettes merged together as one in a passionate embrace once again, she fled back to the safety of her car. She did not look back at the house as she drove down the street with tears in her eyes.
For the last two years, Jane had been avoiding anything romantic, and had good success at doing it. She did not go to movies, watched very little television and had taken all of her CDs and made them into to tapes, omitting the love songs. The books she read were either empowering or educational and she made sure they did not deal with relationships before she bought them. Jane had found great strength in her regiment, and even though she was exposed to 'love' everyday of her life, she had been able to ignore it. So, why did seeing Elizabeth and William together affect her so much?
Being prepared to think the worst of the man she had not yet met made Jane feel better. She did not want to trust William with her sister's heart and she had already begun drafting the speech she was going to give Elizabeth once her unfounded suspicions were proven correct. It wasn't that Jane wanted her to be as alone as she was, but she did not want her to suffer. The trouble was that in the course of two minutes Jane was already beginning to doubt her motives.
Was it possible that deep down inside, she did not want to believe any form of love shown between a man and a woman was true and lasting? Had her attitude become so callous because of her own bad experience?
Jane did not have any problems with Mary and Steven's relationship, but they were also the type of people not to show their affections to outsiders. When she was with them last night there wasn't one longing look or squeeze of the hand, yet she could tell they were happy with each other. Jane did not know, and she wasn't in the mood to psychoanalyze herself right now. All she really knew was that she would not return to Elizabeth's house until she was certain the party was underway. With the distraction of other people around she would be able to maintain her composure, but for now she shed tears.
7:50 p.m.
"I'm going inside to say hello to William and meet Elizabeth. It was nice seeing you again, Jay. Give me a call sometime."
"You too, Charles. Tell Lillian I said 'Hello'."
"Will do."
Charles looked around at the front porch before he went into the house. He hadn't expected William's girlfriend to own a real house, but this was a sign that she may be a sound, sensible woman. He was already 15 minutes late due to his unfamiliarity with Hinsdale, but he liked what he saw so far.
It was warm for a November night and the front door was open. He went in and began to look for his friend. The living room and sitting room were full of people and if Charles was to guess, he would say there were at least 20 people in the house. William's height made him easy to spot and Charles went directly over to him. He was talking with another friend from their school days and a couple of dark-haired women.
"Charles, I was wondering if you were going to make it." William shook his hand. "You remember Kyle Driskell."
"Hello Kyle, I haven't seen you in ages."
"Charles, always good to see you. This is my wife Teresa."
"And this is Mary Bennet, Elizabeth's sister." She smiled as she was introduced.
Mary had no lingering bad feeling toward William. When Elizabeth returned from Memphis, she clarified to Mary that their breakup was caused by the both of them. Since she was not one to intrude into other people's personal lives, Mary accepted her explanation at face value and welcomed William back into their circle.
"Hello." Charles thought Mary was an attractive woman and wondered if Elizabeth resembled her.
"Hello, Charles."
"Mary's family owns Bennet Computer and they just installed a network at U of I-Chicago—your old alma-matter. Kyle works there as a Scholarship Dean." William informed him.
"Really," Charles turned to Kyle, "how are things at Chicago?"
"Real good. A lot has changed in the past several years. I was just talking to Mary about some programming I was wanting when they come to install the new network in my building next quarter." Kyle replied.
The group chatted for a while before William found an opening to move on.
"If you'll excuse us, I'm going to take Charles to find Elizabeth. She hasn't met him yet."
The two men left and ventured into the fray of people. They found her in the kitchen laughing with Charlotte while putting some shrimp shish kabobs on a plate.
"These are really good, Lizzy." Charlotte said as she took another shrimp. "How did you make them?"
"I marinated them overnight and William grilled them. I think we have found his talent…" A hand on her back made her turn around quickly to see who was behind her.
"Elizabeth, I would like you to meet Charles Bingley." William brushed a few stray curls away from her eyes.
With a beaming smile, she turned her attention to the blond man next to him. He was not quite as tall as William was, but he must be close to 6'. His build was slightly athletic with the broad shoulders and strong arms that often go along with it. 'Boyishly cute' was how she thought of him with the loose curls and bright blue eyes. If the warmth expressed on his face was any indication, his disposition was obviously pleasing. Elizabeth liked Charles right away.
"Charles, I have heard so much about you and now we finally get to meet." She took both of his hands in hers. "I'm glad you could come tonight."
With the same feeling of instant attachment, Charles smiled back at her as they started up a conversation with each other. William stepped away from them and closer to Charlotte to give her a kiss on the cheek.
"I didn't see you come in. Is your husband with you?" There was a special place in his heart for Charlotte after all she did to help him find Elizabeth.
"We snuck in through the garage when we saw the crowd on the front porch. This is a nice party."
William grinned at her.
"Bill is somewhere. He spotted Steven when we came in and I haven't seen his since. I'll take these Kabobs out to the table so Lizzy can talk with your friend."
"Thanks, Charlotte."
"No problem. Just think William, you only have about 100 more cousins to meet before you can say you know the family!" Giggling, she took the plate and left.
Elizabeth was asking Charles about his job when William returned.
"…We call them 'clients' instead of patients. It is some sort of social nicety the doctors in the group use. I'm still trying to get the hang of it. This week alone I have had two cases where I felt the children really didn't need any treatment, but the over zealous parents might."
"You mean some people are treating therapy like it is 'the thing to do'?" Elizabeth was engrossed in what Charles was telling her.
"Exactly! Maybe I have been working with children who really needed the help for too long, but it seems ridiculous to me for people to waste their time and money on services that are unnecessary."
"Charles," William interjected, "did you sign a time-commitment contract with the Center?"
"One year. A year will give me enough time to see if I am suited for the job or not." Charles abruptly stopped speaking and stared at the door leading to the garage. An expressionless blond woman had just closed it and she was looking directly at him with empty eyes.
Tanya? She looks just like Tanya.
Elizabeth and William both turned to see what had grabbed his attention away from the conversation.
"Jane!" Elizabeth went over to her and linked her arm with her sisters. Charles watched as the woman forced a light smile on her face while being led closer to them.
"William, this is my sister Jane."
"Hello Jane," he took her thin, cold hand in his, "it is a pleasure."
"The pleasure is mine." She replied quietly while expanding her smile more.
"Let me take your coat, Jane. You must be burning up." Elizabeth helped her take off her wool blazer. "Can you believe it was 64 degrees today? We had all of the windows open here." Jane blinked when she heard her sister use the word 'we' and Charles watched her as she did it.
Jane was perfection from head to toe. Her clothing was a neatly tailored ensemble consisting of a pressed silk shirt and wool pants that matched her jacket. Her shoes had a slight heal making her not too tall as compared to the average person. She did her blond hair in the usual bun positioned in the center of the back of her head, drawing attention to her earrings that matched her necklace and bracelet. Jane was absolutely gorgeous on the outside. It was a pity the inside of her was as hollow as a canyon.
Try as he might, Charles could not take his eyes off of her. It was not a male-female attraction holding him spellbound, but the resemblance to his former patient in Detroit. She and Tanya looked so much alike it was spooky. They shared the same small facial features, hair color, and most importantly look on their face. Tanya had only been 12 when he saw he last, and Jane was…he could not tell how old she was, but if Tanya had lived he believed she would have looked very much like the woman standing in front of him. The conversation kept proceeding and until he heard his name mentioned, he did not hear a word of it.
"Charles Bingley, this is Jane Bennet. Charles is a friend of William's. They grew up next door to one another."
"Hello Charles." Jane was bringing out her best 'party persona' out. Stop looking at me like that. I'm not interested.
"Hello Jane." He was going to shake her hand, but she did not move to extend it.
Elizabeth eyes passed between the two of them, mistaking Charles reaction to Jane as one of interest.
"Jane, Charles is a Child Psychiatrist in Elgin. He attended U of I-Chicago while you were at U of I-Urbana. He also just returned to the area, like you." Jane just nodded her head in acknowledgment, but Elizabeth did not falter. "Charles, I did not ask you, what town are you living in?"
"Oak Park."
"That must be a long commute every day." Jane commented as she crossed her arms in front of her.
"It is, I agree. How long of a commute do you have?" Reading her body language was easy for him. She was only talking to be polite, but the message she was subconsciously sending out did not phase Charles. He saw it everyday he went to work and had learned to work around it.
"I don't. I haven't started working yet."
Jane was finished with her part of the conversation with Charles and turned back to the others. William had wrapped his arm around Elizabeth's waist and was placing a kiss on the side of her head.
Eric's words echoed through her head: Jane, we really should not show any overt display of affection when we're in the company of others. I think it looks gaudy and lacking of good taste. Don't you agree?
"Charles, Jane. May I get you something to drink? I am forgetting my hostess duties." Elizabeth asked as she wound her fingers between William's. Jane had to avert her eyes to keep from being embarrassed.
"Nothing for me, Elizabeth." Charles smiled when he saw the two of them standing so close together. "I should not monopolize all of your time from your other guests."
"You're not, Charles. I hope we see you often now that you are close by. Jane, anything for you?"
"Thank you Lizzy, but I can get it myself," Jane looked through the kitchen archway to the rest of the house. For a second her smile dropped, but she caught it and put it back on. The house was packed full of strangers and relatives. "Is Mother here?"
"Yes, somewhere out there." Elizabeth had not seen her for a while, and Charles was actually right about her needing to check on the rest of her guests.
"I think I'll go find her. Did she bring Lydia?" There was more than one mission Jane wished to accomplish tonight.
"No, Lydia went to an out of town Varsity football game."
"On a Saturday night? I didn't know they had Varsity games on Saturdays." Jane asked suspiciously. She was not pleased with her little sister's behavior when she saw her this morning and was determined to find out what the girl was up to.
"That is what she told Mama. I'll help you find her."
With that said the private gathering broke up and mingled with the other people in the house.
Rose Bennet found herself surrounded by her three eldest daughters. They were all such pretty girls. Of course, Jane was the most beautiful, but Elizabeth and Mary turned out quite well.
Some people believe that with motherhood comes the ability of super-sensitive hearing and the growth of eyes in the back of your head, but this was not true with Rose. What she gained upon entering the most revered state was keen eyesight when it came to changes in her children. Three minutes after Mary joined their group her mother-sense kicked in and it spotted a diamond on Mary's left hand-ring finger.
"Mary! When did you become engaged?" Rose announced in a booming voice. Jane and Elizabeth looked at Mary in astonishment.
Closing her eyes tight and clenching her jaw, Mary wished, wished, wished that her mother did not just yell loud enough for half of the room to hear…and if her mother really did, her second wish was for her to disappear. Didn't happen and Rose stood ready for an explanation.
"Mother, if you will keep your voice down, I will tell you." Mary waited for her to agree before she said anymore. She had such a way of handling Rose; the other girls were truly in awe.
"Steven and I do not wish to announce our engagement tonight, this is a party for William. We decided to get married a few weeks ago and picked up the ring today."
"Wonderful, Mary! When do you want to get married?" The wheels in Rose's head began to spin out of control. "Oh, I hope our church is big enough! Well, if it isn't, we can go down to the Immaculate Conception Church. I am sure Father…"
"Mother, you can stop right there." She once again waited while her mother regained her composure. "Before you turn this wedding into a circus, I should tell you that there will only be immediate family at the ceremony. We will have a large reception afterwards."
"Mary, how can you say that?" she whined. "Surely you want everybody to see you. I know you will change your mind, but you must not wait too long or else the church will be reserved by someone else." Rose stamped her foot on the floor as she began to wind herself up for a fit of nerves.
Jane looked away with a tight grin on her face and Elizabeth put her hand over her mouth to stop from laughing. They both waited for Mary's next move.
"Well, it is either my way or Steven and I are going to the Justice of the Peace." Mary wore a straight face; she knew the words 'Justice of the Peace' were her ticket to peace. "Which do you think is better, Mother?"
Rose's eyes flew wide open and she froze mid-stamp to digest Mary's threat. While she stood there thinking, the other girls quietly congratulated Mary.
"Have you set a date?" Jane asked.
"December 31st of this year. I called the Swissotel and reserved a large conference room for the reception. We thought we would get married at three in the afternoon and then head downtown right after the wedding. I have found a band that wasn't booked for New Year's Eve, so we could celebrate both that night. I am holding rooms for the family so that no one has to drive home afterwards."
"Sounds lovely, Mary." Jane looked over at her mother from the corner of her eye. "The Swissotel is exquisite. I am surprised you were able to get a reception room at this late date. It is such an exclusive meeting place."
"You are so right, Jane." Elizabeth winked at her. "And so expensive. It is one of Chicago's premiere hotels, but of course, you know that."
"They had a cancellation and I happened to call on the right day. I need to set a menu next week and could use some help." Mary was not totally insensitive when it came to her mother. It was never her intention to have a large wedding, but if she could include her mother in the plans for the reception, it was a small price to pay to make her happy.
"Mary, Mama sets a wonderful table. Maybe you should ask her to help?"
"Elizabeth is right." Jane agreed. Seeing mother was softening, Jane put her arm around her. "Everyone always raves about the talent Mother has when it comes to organizing large gatherings.
"Mother? Will you help me arrange the reception?" Mary smiled. How much damage could one woman do to a wedding reception?
"Of course, silly girl! I suppose a small wedding is rather chic in this day and age, and since the reception is going to be so lavish, who will notice?" Rose Bennet was truly overjoyed for her daughter. Mary would be married at last!