"What think you of this sentence, my dear Lizzy?" said Jane as she finished it. "Is it not clear enough? Does it not expressly declare that Caroline neither expects nor wishes me to be her sister; that she is perfectly convinced of her brother's indifference; and that if she suspects the nature of my feelings for him, she means (most kindly!) to put me on my guard? Can there be any other opinion on the subject?"

"Yes, there can; for mine is totally different. Will you hear it?"
Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

Posted on 2009-01-13

Jane sat in her Aunt's London home and contemplated the letter to Elizabeth she had just completed. She sat wondering how her dear sister's visit with their cousin Mr. Collins was going and whether she would read more into the letter than Jane hoped to express. Of course she would. Lizzy was always being analytical, often to her own detriment. The letter had been written just after Caroline Bingley's return visit. A full three weeks after social etiquette requested. After trying to rationalise her obvious distaste with her environment, and her not- so- friendly attitude towards herself, Jane finally concluded that a continued friendship was not likely.

What did that mean for herself and Mr. Bingley? Jane still glowed when she thought of that particular gentleman and how his behaviour, even she in all her modesty, had indicated his very particular regard for herself. Did he truly not wish to know her anymore? Could he be so callous? Perhaps he merely didn't know she was in Town, however unlikely that would be with his sisters knowing of her whereabouts.

For the first time in her life, Jane felt the beginnings of resentment stirring within her. She had hoped and had been deceived. Deceived in his regard for her, if indeed what Caroline hoped would occur- his union with Miss Darcy. Jane could not believe, even in her hardened state of mind, that Mr. Bingley would be the sort to marry without regard.

She reviewed Mr. Bingley's association with herself and could do nothing but conclude that he had liked her, preferred her to every other female in their circle. Why then, would he neglect her now? Perhaps he merely had been too busy to attend to their acquaintance? As much as it hurt, the kindliness of Jane decided to place her hopes in this thought.

"Jane," Mrs. Gardiner sat down beside her unusually quiet niece. "You seem troubled; would you like to talk about it with me?"

"Aunt," Jane turned her disturbed eyes to her, "I do believe Lizzy has finally rubbed off some of her critical nature onto me."

She attempted a smile, but it did not reach her eyes. Instead, they began to water as a new way of looking at the world presented itself to her.

Mrs. Gardiner watched with sadness as her sweet, loving niece, always ready to think the best of everyone and every situation suddenly had the veil moved from her eyes and the concept of cruelty and maliciousness entered into her mind.

It was the moment that Jane lost her innocent, beautiful outlook on life.

"Oh Aunt," she rested her heavy head onto the older woman, "Miss Bingley has been cruel to me, hasn't she? Why haven't I realised this before? All those times I thought we were becoming close friends, she was secretly laughing at my naiveté. How could I be so blind?"

"My dear Jane, I have to admit that Miss Bingley seemed to behave in a way that was most unpleasant, and nothing at all like what you would hope a close acquaintance would. Perhaps," she began tentatively, "she was just having a bad day, and other thoughts kept her preoccupied?"

Jane shook her head sadly, she could no longer accept such a paltry and obvious excuse for Miss Bingley's behaviour. Perhaps yesterday she would have been able to lead herself to believe such. But not today. Not now that she was aware.

"I'm surprised that Miss Bingley bothered to call at all. Perhaps she wished to gloat over my situation? Or dig the wound of her brother's loss to me deeper?"

"Oh Jane, it hurts me to have you think so."

"Can you deny that this is not what you think of our caller this morning? Aunt, please be honest with me. I know you have good judgement and that you are not easily deceived. What is your opinion of Caroline Bingley?"

Mrs. Gardiner paused to collect her thoughts. Jane had asked for honesty and as much as it would be tearing down her niece's last hope that the world was indeed always a lovely place, she could not deny the mute plea in her eyes.

"Very well Jane, I shall tell you my private opinion of Miss Bingley." She straightened on her chair and Jane sat up and folded her hands on her lap and looked directly at Mrs. Gardiner, prepared for the truth.

"We know that you sent two letters informing her of your stay in Town, and then you visited her as was proper and normal for an acquaintance such as yours. Reading between the lines of what you have told me of your visit with her, I believe that she snubbed you and was quite condescending. I imagine that she was not surprised by your visits, even though she, I believe, falsely said that your letters had not reached her. She seemed quite determined to wound you when speaking of Mr. Bingley's attachment with Miss Darcy and that he knew of your being in Town but was too busy to bother with visiting you."

Jane dropped her head.

"I do not think Miss Bingley is a sincere person, and that she does not wish to keep your acquaintance as evidence by the length of time she took returning your call and the brevity of her stay here this morning. Jane, I do not like Miss Bingley and think she would not be a nice companion for you."

Jane kept her head bowed, so Mrs. Gardiner ventured to reassure her.

"But Jane, you should not miss her company. You are far too good for her, and I know this will not comfort you now, but she is not worth your distress."

"I know you are right Aunt," Jane slowly raised her face to reveal a single tear streak. "I should not regret the friendship, and I believe in time, I will simply see it as an unfortunate event. But Aunt, she has made me think ill of the world. She has opened up a new outlook on life, which is quite horrible to me. I can see now why Lizzy told me that she loves so few people and was so disillusioned with society. Oh Aunt, it is awful!"

Mrs. Gardiner gathered her up in her arms and let Jane mourn her changed perspective.

As luck would have it, one of the Gardiner children needed his mother, and so Mrs. Gardiner was forced to leave her niece looking out sorrowfully of the window.

As the door clicked behind her Aunt, Jane drew her knees up underneath her as she used to as a little girl. People moved below her outside of the window and she marvelled that they would have no idea of the change within her from just an hour ago when she had looked out and spotted Miss Bingley descending from her carriage.

Pushing Miss Bingley from her mind, Jane confronted the problem that was Mr. Bingley. She knew from her own feelings that she still loved him, but she doubted his regard for her. Even if, as Lizzy tried to point out to her weeks ago, Mr. Bingley had been dissuaded by his sisters and possibly Mr. Darcy, what did that say about Mr. Bingley's nature? Could this lack of constancy be something she could admire? She could not believe that Mr. Bingley toyed with her affections. She truly believed that he had liked her, even loved her. If he were to enter the house this afternoon, could she love him again? Love him enough to join with him forever?

She was scared to admit that she did not know.

Miss Bingley was glad to be over the visit to dear Jane. That the morning's visit marked the end of the acquaintance with all of the Bennet's, she was certain. She felt weary. She truly had liked Jane for herself, and admired her implicit trust and optimism. It was very much like her brother's. Unfortunately, she knew what was required of herself and her brother in society and she squashed that momentary pity as ruthlessly as she had with every other aspect of her old self before entering Madame Le Pioux's finishing school. Before she had been more open with her feelings and had a happy childhood. After five years, she returned to her family much the same as her older sister had- calculating, cold and haughty.

She was all the better for it, she was certain. After all, once she had convinced Charles that he would be happy marrying Miss Georgiana Darcy, she could finish a project she had spent years planning. Mrs Caroline Darcy would show the upper class of London how much of the perfect hostess and woman she was. Then they would pay for destroying her simple, girlish happiness.

The thought that she had become exactly what she previously despised entered her mind, but like everything else, she stomped on it. Smoothing her features, she assumed the correct attitude befitting her rank and fortune and turned her mind to tonight's party. She also tried to figure out an easy way to inform Mr. Darcy on their success with her brother and Jane. It was so distressing that he was out of her reach, but at least he was merely visiting his Aunt and sickly cousin so there was no need for concern with him forming a hasty attachment. Miss Bingley had obviously never heard the rumour that he was to marry his cousin.

Charles Bingley paced his room. He was fidgety and out of sorts. He had been acting more erratically in the last few weeks. He had returned from a meeting with his agent from Netherfield three weeks ago to feel the presence of Jane within his town house. Although knowing it was impossible, he was certain that he caught the scent of her when passing the entrance where visitor's cloaks, wraps and belongings were kept during their stay. Upon asking his sisters who had visited today and getting no satisfactory reply, he was prevented from asking the butler by his sisters needing him to accompany them on yet another shopping spree which lasted the rest of the day.

By the time he asked the butler the next morning, the butler clearly stated that no one had visited on the previous morning. If Bingley had been a more suspicious person, he would have noted how nervous the butler had looked. Of course Bingley did not think of asking any other staff, nor did he have much time to contemplate it. Darcy had been visiting every day for the past few weeks before his trip to Rosings Park and filling in his time with inquiring about new properties, visiting their club, fencing and an assortment of other activities that the gentlemen of the day were wont to do. When he wasn't off with Darcy, his sister felt that he simply must accompany them on their excursions shopping and visiting their acquaintances.

Finally, today was the first time he had had to himself. Caroline had finally decided that his presence was unnecessary for her morning calls today and Darcy of course would have arrived at his Aunt's estate for his annual visit to Rosings Park. So he paced his room, quite bored, but restless. He was of course, remembering pleasant conversations with Miss Bennet and reminding himself sternly why he would not be able to pursue the prettiest, the most angelic lady he had ever known. However today the reasons not to persist in his courtship, outlined so forcefully by Louisa, Caroline and Darcy, were having no effect on the memory of her beautiful eyes, the graceful curve of her neck and the warm smile she had directed at him so many times.

"Stop it man! You're only torturing yourself!" Bingley reminded his reflection sternly in the dressing glass.

He stopped. Why was he torturing himself? Was it because he could not forget her, or because he could not have her? He didn't want to forget her, no matter how unsuitable she was as a wife. Why could he not have her? If he had no money, no wealth, no station to uphold, what would he do?

And then it all clicked. Jane was what he would want, what he would spend his time pursuing. If she meant so much to him, why did he give her up for what others said? She was not really beneath him, no matter how much his sisters insisted on this, Darcy could not agree to it. She was poor, this was something they all agreed upon. This was true, she was poor, not very poor, but an alliance with him would raise her future standing. Bingley saw this only as a positive. His father had been successful in his trade, and had left enough money for Bingley to live comfortably without marrying a woman with a large dowry. Therefore, this point was not really a consideration. Of course, he was not denying the benefit of having a larger pool of money, especially if he were to sire many children, but could he not try to build up his own fortune and provide for his family as best he could as his father did? This challenged Bingley to think that he should become his own master, that he should learn the management of his estate, his money and investments. He felt resolved, and only hoped that this resolve would last longer than today. He was sure that to win Jane, to provide for her and their children, he could be determined enough for anything.

She does not love you Bingley Darcy's voice floated in his memory. I could see no especial regard for you in her looks. Did she give you any concrete indication that she felt for you more than anyone else in her acquaintance?

He remembered his tortured "no" to this question. After being pounded on all sides by the three of them, suddenly Jane's smiles and favours did not seem so particularly aimed at him. She was generous and gracious to all her dancing partners, she was kind and smiling to all her acquaintances. He doubted her affection and a new outlook was revealed. Although he highly doubted their veiled attempts to make him believe that she was mercenary, or at least complying with her mother's unconcealed attempts of marrying her daughters off, it added doubt to his mind and he became the unsure boy again, easily swayed and led by his friends and sisters, who after all, surely only had his best interests at heart.

Now he wondered if he was too trusting in their objective observations. His new formed resolve wavered, but he clung to it desperately. Perhaps he could try to become Master of his own matters and eventually his own destiny? When he gained some self confidence and judgement, then he could go back to Jane and see for himself how deeply she felt for him.

Would she wait for him though?

It was with that harrowing thought that Bingley stopped pacing and rang for his steward. He would push on regardless, and wish, from his heart, that Jane would always be kind, gentle and loving.

Chapter Two: Growth

Posted on 2009-01-21

That night, as Bingley greeted acquaintances and escorted his sister Caroline to the – Assembly, it reminded him forcefully of his entrance to the Meryton Assembly a few months ago. Although this room was grander and decorated more richly, the same types of people were present- those who came to dance and be merry, those who came out of obligation and were bored, the cynical, the daring and the mamas, all circled in the endless and timeless dance.

Bingley had never felt so old, so out of spirits.

After seeing Caroline to her usual circle of friends, Bingley hung around the walls. He was not inclined to dance, not without Jane, so he kept to the side and tried to avoid the mamas and belles who cleverly and clumsily tried to get him to escort them onto the dancing floor. He smiled briefly as he thought he was mimicking Darcy's movements. The smile attracted the notice of the gentleman standing near to him.

"Obligation?" the gentleman inquired.

Bingley turned his head, puzzled by the question.

The other man smiled, "Usually there are three reasons for men to be attending an Assembly- pleasure, boredom or obligation. I find myself usually trying to categorise the men around me into one of those three. I'm guessing that your appearance tonight is due more to obligation."

Bingley smiled naturally, intrigued. "And how did you come to that conclusion sir?"

"Well, you look too preoccupied to have turned up because you are merely bored and wanted some society. You have not danced with any of the multitudes of ladies yet, nor spoken above two words with any particular acquaintance, so I derive that you are not here for pleasure. Which leaves obligation."

"Quite accurate, I usually take pleasure in a ball, but had it been my choice, I would not have ventured out tonight. My sister insisted that she simply must come tonight, therefore it was left to me to escort her."

"Yes," the gentleman slyly grinned, "I must admit, I noticed you come in with a lady, and therefore my deduction was all the more easily reached. My name is Croydon, Alexander Croydon."

"Charles Bingley, how do you do?"

"In much the same state as you I fear, I have been forced by an anxious Mother to frequent the Balls during our stay in London in order that I might find the future companion of my life!" Alexander Croydon ruefully smiled.

"I hazard that you don't take much pleasure in this Assembly?"

"No, I am not particularly partial to London society and its intrigues and would rather not find my bride one of the simpering, social ladies of the Ton. I do enjoy dancing, I simply rather to be in the country, attending one of the more simple dances there."

"Yes," Charles sighed. "I recently came from the country and enjoyed the Assemblies and Balls there immensely."

"Where were you staying?" Croydon inquired.

"In Hertfordshire, I recently rented an estate there, Netherfield, that I was considering purchasing."

"I have heard of Hertfordshire, it is supposed to have very pretty countryside. Dare I inquire what takes you from your country residence?"

"I had some business to take care of in London, and then my entire party removed themselves from Netherfield and followed me here to inform me of some distressing news." He again sighed, quite depressed.

Alexander Croydon noticed the dispirited man and wisely did not inquire into the nature of the distressing news. Croydon was two and seven and could hazard a guess that the distressing news was of the female variety.

They stood together for a while in silence.

"Where do you hail from?" Bingley asked, realising he didn't know the gentleman and had been just about to relate some very personal information about himself.

"-- Lodge, near Bath, I have a family estate in the countryside there called Ashfield. It's very pretty woodland and not nearly so crowded as London!" he smiled as he was forced to step back to allow a party of giggling ladies past.

"No," Bingley smiled in response, "Has it been in your family long? I have the duty of trying to find myself and my sister, Caroline, an estate to settle into. My father unfortunately died before he could fulfil his last wish of becoming a landowner."

"It has been in my family for about three generations. I am the only son, indeed the only child and my Mother has been very strongly suggesting that she would enjoy some female companionship sometime soon."

Bingley nodded in sympathy. "Do you have a residence in Bath?"

"Yes, we do. I have been thinking about buying a place in London, but I'm not entirely sure that I would use it often enough to warrant the purchase."

"It seems we are quite the opposite, for I already have a Townhouse in London, in – street, but have yet to settle in the country."

Both men stood nodding and smiling at each other. Mr. Croydon reminded Bingley a little of Darcy- he had that same confidence with business, the same self-assuredness that Bingley was trying to achieve. He was however, not as… imperious… as Darcy about it. Admittedly, Croydon did not have such an impressive lineage as Darcy, or seemed to not, considering he had only been landed gentry for a few generations, and the Darcy's went back for quite some time.

Bingley found that he liked his new acquaintance very much indeed. Perhaps his new friend would be able to help him find an estate, or settle his affairs?

"Would you like to meet me for lunch tomorrow, Mr. Croydon? I usually eat at my club, --." Bingley asked.

"That sounds wonderful. Shall I meet you there at noon then?"

Bingley smiled and nodded. If nothing else, this Alexander Croydon may prove to be a very good friend indeed.

While Bingley was becoming further acquainted with his new friend over the next few days, Jane spent the time mainly in her room, and the small sitting room thinking about what she could do to become content again. Mr and Mrs Gardiner watched their niece with growing alarm as she became more and more withdrawn. On the morning that they had just finished discussing whether they should send for Elizabeth, Jane came down to breakfast smiling bravely.

"Good morning Aunt and Uncle."

"Good morning my dear, how do you feel this morning?" Mr. Gardiner inquired gently.

Jane smiled at him and replied that she was feeling much better. They were both very glad, and soon Mr. Gardiner left for his business feeling that Jane was recovering from her depression.

Mrs. Gardiner was not quite so convinced. Although Jane entered into conversation and resumed looking after the children and helping Mrs. Gardiner about the house, Jane would often seem distracted and sometimes stop quite what she was doing and stare sombrely about the room as if missing something important.

After a week of slowly improving spirits, Jane was still feeling restless and hollow inside. She was at a loss what to do to keep herself busy so as to not think about the Bingleys and her loss of optimism. After approaching her Aunt about her need for more employment, it was suggested that Jane come to the next meeting for the local Ladies Auxiliary and help with the upcoming Charity Fair that was being held in a few weeks' time.

Jane accepted with alacrity and the next day she started work on an intricate pillow cover.

Each day, in her spare time, Jane spent working on some form of needlework and by the time of the meeting, the pile of lovely embroidery Jane had completed astonished Mrs. Gardiner. Taking some samples with them, they made the short journey to the local Church and Jane was introduced to half a dozen older ladies and one younger lady a bit older than Jane.

"Jane, may I introduce our newest member, Miss Eugenia Kilpatrick. This is my niece Miss Jane Bennet."

The ladies curtseyed to each other and Mrs. Gardiner left Jane to learn more about her new acquaintance.

"Have you been working here long, Miss Kilpatrick?" Jane inquired softly.

"Not very long at all, Miss Bennet. I came to London to pick my trousseau with my mama. I will be living here with my husband, but he is often away on business, so I decided to become a member of the local charity organisation and to meet new people."

Jane's smile grew sad, "How wonderful to be getting married! May I wish you joy and hope that you will have a very happy life together."

Miss Kilpatrick noted the look of sadness pass over Jane and thanked her sincerely. "I am sure my Frederick and I will have a very happy life together. Although it will be a struggle at first, as he is still making a name for himself in the world, but I am confident that he shall excel and I do not mind working beside him, as long as I am with him."

"It sounds lovely my dear. What sort of business is your fiancé in?"

"He imports and sells fine materials for clothing and linen." Eugenia was reassured by Jane's warm smile that the other lady did not think ill of her getting married to a man in trade. "Do you live in London, Miss Bennet?"

"No" Jane replied softly. "I am visiting my Aunt and Uncle Gardiner for a short time. I live in Hertfordshire, near Meryton."

"Have you enjoyed your stay in London so far?"

Jane lifted her chin bravely, "It has been life changing. And of course, I always enjoy visiting with my Aunt and Uncle and all their dear children."

Miss Kilpatrick, motioning to the samples Jane held in her hand, inquired if she could view them. Jane shyly showed her the embroidery that she had done, and blushed at the praise Miss Kilpatrick showered on her.

"They really are quite lovely my dear Miss Bennet! Exactly the sort of thing that we need to have at the Fair to attract some more consequential customers. You will have to show me how you get so fine a stitch. I myself, am quite hopeless at embroidery, but I do think I am quite good with rugs." She fetched a nearby quilted rug.

"Why this is wonderful!" Jane exclaimed, running her hands along the rug. "Such a lovely pattern, and the wool is so soft!"

"Yes, I treat it with a special liquid. Well," she paused laughing a little, "my fiancé treats his materials with a special liquid, and he has shown me how to. It softens the fibres and the end result is a much softer, smoother rug, or dress, or linen!" It was obvious that Miss Kilpatrick was very proud of her fiancé's skill.

Mrs. Gardiner walked back to hear the last part of the conversation and she urged Miss Kilpatrick to show Jane some of the other fabrics and dresses that she was contributing to the Fair. So Eugenia and Jane walked to the working tables and Jane was amazed at the colours and the designs, not to mention the feel of the fabrics that were resting there.

By the end of the day, not only were Jane and Eugenia calling each other by their Christian names, they were also showing each other their particular skills. By the end of the week, after calling back and forth to each other's houses and when they met for the Charity Fair, they were both growing in skill. Jane would often stitch some embroidery to the top of a dress, or the corner of a kerchief that Eugenia had finished.

Jane was still troubled by her change and heartbreak, but she was learning to deal with it patiently and she found a new pleasure in her work that made her forget for a few hours that there was a gentleman by the name of Mr. Charles Bingley.

Bingley and Croydon in those first few weeks had become fast friends. Slowly, Bingley had confided more of his newfound desire to become self-sufficient and Croydon, unlike Darcy, supported Bingley in his endeavours without doing them for him. Where Darcy would sit in for every meeting and often talk to the steward, advisor or other such official for Bingley, Croydon would explain terms, offer advice, but insist that Bingley do all the work himself. The first weeks were quite hard on Bingley, but the thought of Jane's smiling acceptance of his new and improved self kept him working. It also helped that Darcy was away and Bingley often found himself with a lot of time on his hands, without much to do.

Caroline was bemused at her brother's sudden activity, but relieved that she did not have to keep such a close eye on him. Miss Bingley had met Mr. Croydon a few times and found out that he had merely 3000 pounds a year- much too little for her. Besides, he was not as handsome as Darcy and actually retained ties with the trade that shot his family into the landed gentry! Terrible!

What Caroline did not know was that Croydon had been urging Bingley to take a more active interest in the trade that Mr. Bingley senior had made his money in, and Bingley soon found that he actually enjoyed it. Bingley started to appreciate the effort and skill his father had for creating a large fabric and linen trade. Quietly, he started appearing at board meetings, talking to workers in the factories and eventually suggesting better ways of improving the lives of the workers, as well as innovative ideas (sometimes Croydon's opinions) for increasing the profit margins.

With the additional capital, Bingley decided, after explaining the idea to his friend, to try opening up a new trade negotiation with Russia. He had also heard of a new way of making the fabrics, or treating the fabrics, that made them stronger and softer. He wanted very much to meet the man who had come up with this idea. It was while Bingley was pondering how he could approach the man and learn more about him, that Mr. Croydon was announced by his butler.

"Alex!" Bingley exclaimed getting quickly to his feet. "Exactly the person I was hoping to meet!"

"Hello Charles, I hope you are having a nice morning." Alexander Croydon smiled in greeting.

"Yes, indeed I am." Motioning for Croydon to pull up a seat, he continued. "You know how I told you that a few of the workmen at my factory had heard of a new way of treating, or producing fabrics. Well, I was thinking this could precisely be the thing to give me that added advantage. Of course I need to find the man and see if it doesn't weaken the fabric or make them smelly or something like that. How would you like to track this man," Bingley fumbled with the pieces of paper on his desk, "a Mr. Tobs?"

Alex laughed at his friend's exuberance. "Unfortunately not for me, Charles. I came to tell you that my Mother is getting impatient to return to the country, although she insists that I come back and find that bride! I am set to leave tomorrow morning and expect to be in the country at least a week."

"Oh," Charles' face fell.

"How would you like to come with me?" Alex asked.

Charles thought for a moment. "It's a generous offer, Alex, but I really think that I should try to find this young man and strike a deal with him. I will take you up on the offer some other time?"

Alex smiled and nodded. "I'm sure there will be many other opportunities. Well my friend, you certainly have gotten the knack of this whole business nonsense as you expressed it all those weeks ago."

Bingley chuckled with him. "Yes, thanks to you."

They spent the rest of the morning going over a few options for Bingley to approach Mr. Tobs with. Bingley, to Mr. Croydon's pride, spoke the most, and had the most ideas to offer. Croydon felt that Bingley would cope very well on his own.

Half way through the next week, Caroline was pacing furiously in her brother's study.

"Caroline, I would like you to go." Bingley demanded firmly. "It is for charity and I know that Mr. Tobs, my new associate, has a few dresses, linens and cloths for sale."

"But Charles…"

"It would please me greatly," Bingley interrupted, "if you would go with some of your friends and be a kind of benefactress to the event." Bingley smiled wryly. That should please her vanity.

"You are not even coming Charles?" Caroline exclaimed. "I am certainly not going to some bazaar held in Cheapside of all places! I don't care three straws for your newfound business venture. The entire ordeal is too much to be born!"

"Caroline!" Bingley stated firmly. "You are going to go upstairs, change your clothes, call on a few of your insipid friends and buy some items from the Fair!"

"How dare you speak to me in such a manner! I will not…"

"I don't care!" Bingley again broke in, his anger starting to show through. "You will. I have already ordered the carriage. You have not objected to relying on my money for all these years. If you don't go, I shall cut off your allowance and see you flounder about drawing from your inheritance."

Caroline stared at her brother in amazement. He had never taken that tone of voice with her, and the anger on his face made her afraid for a moment. Afraid of Charles? Preposterous! she sniffed. Unfortunately, she could not dare lose her claim on his allowance. Her inheritance of 20,000 pounds she could not touch until she was 25, a silly stipulation her father put in his will, so she was completely at her brother's mercy. He had always been very tractable for allowing her and Louisa, before she married, and even now, after she was married, to spend as much as they wanted.

"Very well Charles. I don't see why you have to be so high handed all of a sudden. I've always been the most obliging sister you know."

"Just go Caroline." Charles sat wearily, disliking making ultimatums with his sister. Caroline tossed her head in annoyance, moving toward the door quite angry at him.

"Oh and Caroline," Charles began. "Don't even think of slamming the door."

Caroline's blood boiled at his infuriating manner. It was only a silly Fair anyway. So what if his precious new business friend and his fiancé were donating a lot of money and time for the Fair. Why did she have to tediously smile at the lower class all day? And drag some of her friends into it? She would soon have none left.

Feeling very hard done by, she went upstairs and scolded her maid for being slow at dressing her.

A few hours later Caroline with her friends Miss Tawly and Miss Patricks were strolling arm in arm, fluttering their fans in distaste at their surroundings. The Fair indeed was a very low bazaar where children scampered around undisciplined and men stood leering at her and her friends. Miss Tawly and Miss Patricks exchanged many long and snide glances at Caroline when she wasn't looking. They thought that Caroline's taste was excessively poor for asking them to come out and dirty their petticoats this side of London.

"This really is such a delightful place Caroline, darling." Miss Patricks snidely commented.

"Indeed, we are having ever so much fun. However did you find this gem of a spot?" Miss Tawly joined in.

Caroline smiled insincerely and fumed at Charles.

"Why thank you my dears" Caroline responded "I knew out of all my extensive acquaintances, you two would be the most appreciative of this sort of thing."

They both shot daggered looks at her insinuation.

Caroline desperately hoped that the next booth would hold this Mr. Tobs' goods so she could purchase one or two bolts of cloth as proof to Charles and then leave the horrid place.

Fortunately for her, it was.

"Ah, here we go ladies," Caroline cried. "This is the new material that will be such a success in London this season. My brother Charles is very much certain that the way the material is processed and dyed makes it so much more comfortable and durable."

The ladies simpered at Caroline, and rolled their eyes when she bent to examine some cloth.

"Oh my!" Caroline exclaimed as she stroked a particularly vibrant orange bolt. "It really is very soft!" She was surprised and amazed at the strength of colour.

Her friends looked suspiciously at Caroline thinking that it was a pretence to retain the upper hand, but seeing that she was really completely absorbed in stroking the material- so much so that she had taken one glove off- they too decided that it would not be too beneath them to touch it.

Soon all three ladies were running their hands along the flamboyant colours of cloth and envisaging the envy of the Ton when Miss Patricks would float in on a bright brown and green gown, Caroline with her signature orange and Miss Tawly in a rich puce.

They made a variety of purchases and even condescendingly chatted with the young woman behind the stall who handled their purchases.

"I understand that these cloths are the work of a Mr. Tobs?"

"Yes ma'am" the lady blushed, "he is my fiancé."

"Oh really? How nice." sniffed Caroline, while Miss Tawly smiled behind her handkerchief at Miss Patricks.

"Thank you." Eugenia smiled insincerely and wished them a pleasant day.

The embroidered handkerchiefs and linen in the next booth attracted Miss Tawly and she called both of her companions over to examine one very fine piece.

"It is lovely Sarah" Miss Patricks agreed "don't you think so Caroline?"

"Yes it is exquisite. A Lady must have done these- no doubt some old maid took pity on the Fair and contributed some trifling pieces."

"I am going to buy this one. It would look absolutely charming on my nightstand." Miss Tawly stated.

"Oh, but I want that one, it really is the best piece and it would go ever so much better on the little cherry wood table in my drawing room." complained Miss Patricks "What do you think Caroline? I much rather buy it."

But Caroline was standing in shock for Miss Jane Bennet was the young woman inside the booth with the exquisite embroidery.

Following Caroline's line of sight, Miss Patricks demanded Jane's attention.

"Excuse me, dear," she addressed her condescendingly, "but you must tell me who did these wonderful pieces of work, for I must have some for myself!"

Jane coloured, "I embroidered most of the items on display here."

Miss Patricks and Miss Tawly looked at each other in amazement. This woman was a few years younger than they and could not be so accomplished in the stitching than they.

"Surely not!" Miss Tawly blurted out rudely.

"I assure you madam, they are." Jane lifted her chin proudly and defied them, especially Caroline whom she refused to acknowledge any further than a slight inclination of the head.

Miss Patricks looked at Jane critically. The young woman was quite genteel looking, and her address and deportment showed some breeding. She was quite pretty as well in a pale blue, simple dress.

"Well my dear," Miss Patricks said more civilly. "They really are lovely. Do you have anymore than what is on display?"

Jane, mollified by the change in tone of at least one of the ladies, nodded and smiling tentatively, showed Miss Patricks her more skilful works.

Miss Patricks and Miss Tawly competed in their "oohs" and "ahs" and purchased a few of the most expensive items.

Caroline stood in shock, still amazed that it was dear Jane who was standing before her. What surprised her more though was that Jane was doing her most to ignore her! She felt a slight pricking of conscience as she noticed that Jane, although still lovely (for Caroline could not deny that she was beautiful), was somewhat depressed of spirit. But Jane's high-handed way of believing herself too above Caroline to acknowledge their prior relationship irked her, and she sniffed at Jane when she had bent down to gather more of her items.

Miss Bingley's two companions continued to chat almost pleasantly with Jane about stitches and linens and Caroline turned her attention to the items themselves. They were quite beautiful. There was one handkerchief in particular that drew Caroline to examine it more closely. It was a very sheer piece of linen with a cluster of marigolds and lavender interwoven in each of the four corners. There was a delicate lavender scent and Caroline was enchanted. It perfectly matched the new fabric she had purchased, and she was determined to have it.

Jane looked slightly surprised when Caroline purchased the handkerchief. Jane remembered she had started stitching it with a certain gentleman in mind when she was taken ill at Netherfield, and would have presented it to him when she had finished it. Alas, she had been caught up with Mr. Collins' visit and all the commotion with the officers that she had not finished it until after the Netherfield party had quit for London. She wrestled with the idea of not charging Caroline for it, since it had been intended for her brother, but she remembered the coldness of Caroline's visit and the need to purge him from her memory and hardened her heart. After all, this was a charity Fair, and Caroline had more than enough funds to pay for it.

Feeling increasingly uncomfortable, Caroline eventually managed to pry Miss Patricks and Miss Tawly away from the stall. Jane again nodded to the ladies and then turned to help another customer in choosing something suitable. Caroline left irritated, her triumph at showing her friends that this outing was not a complete waste of time (even if she herself had thought so) soured by Jane's snobbery.

After leaving her friends' houses, Caroline returned home. She was instantly summoned to Charles' study, where she impatiently showed him that she had indeed been to the Fair and bought some of his precious protégé's items. Charles looked with satisfaction on the material and managed to drag out grudging praise from Caroline.

Charles then noticed the dainty handkerchief, and asked to see it. Alarmed, but knowing that there was no way Charles could recognise the maker from the cloth, she allowed Charles to examine it. He held it gently, marvelling at how real the lavender and marigolds looked. For some reason, it reminded him of Netherfield in November and Jane. He knew it was a fancy, but the scent of lavender was so close to how he remembered his Jane smelling when he danced with her at the Ball. He lifted it to his nose and took a deep breath, closing his eyes and smiling.

Caroline watched her brother and for the third time in the last few weeks, she felt guilty. Somehow even though Charles did not know it was made by Jane, he still felt her presence. How she was not sure, but it was becoming increasingly obvious that his feelings for Jane were more than a passing fancy like so many times before. As much as that did not change her opinions on the unsuitableness of Jane as a sister-in-law, she did feel for her brother who had always been kind to her.

Charles was still lost in his memories of Jane, so Caroline slipped away with the new material and left her brother dreaming and holding the handkerchief.

Jane watched her old friend leave with a feeling of relief mixed with triumph. She had braved the unexpected encounter with equanimity and dignity. Miss Bingley had made no move to acknowledge Jane, and so she was determined that nothing but a polite nod would be returned. Jane was not about to beg Caroline for her friendship, nor lower herself in the other's estimation by inquiring after her brother.

Still, she felt deflated and slightly dejected. Shaking her head and refusing to let herself become glum, she smiled in triumph at how many expensive items she had sold, at a slightly higher rate, because even Jane could not help being slightly spiteful after hearing the trio carry on in that snobbish tone. Miss Patricks and Miss Tawly had been nicer in the end, but Jane was not deceived by their interest in herself or her work.

This chance encounter with Miss Bingley did seal the end of their relationship and Jane lost a bit more hope of ever being happily ever after with Bingley. A fool's wish. She told herself yet again. I'm not even sure if you should want to wish for that anymore. Jane could not stop herself from wondering however, how things may have been different if Mr. Bingley had accompanied his sister. She also wondered what his reaction might be hearing of his sister's meeting with her at such a place. He probably wouldn't even remember my first name.

Luckily she was saved from slipping into melancholy by her friend Eugenia excitedly exclaiming at such good fortune as selling a lot of her more outrageous colours to three very distinguished ladies. "I also noticed that you did very well by them. I see half of your goods sold already." She clapped her hands "Frederick will be thrilled to have his materials making their way into more fashionable society."

Jane smiled at her friend, and Miss Kilpatrick, noticing that Jane did not seem quite herself inquired if anything was the matter.

"I knew one of the ladies, a Miss Bingley. She and her brother stayed at an estate Mr. Bingley was renting this winter."

"How strange!" Eugenia cried. "Miss Bingley you say? Why Frederick told me that a Mr. Bingley had approached him with an offer to incorporate his treatment into the business he ran, or sponsored, or something like that. Mr. Bingley called on my fiancé a few days ago and I joined them for the last part of their visit. Frederick was very impressed by Mr. Bingley and thrilled to have such a gentleman interested in his business. He said that his new materials might even be taken to Russia!"

Jane coloured at the mention of Mr. Bingley. To think that there was such a coincidental relationship happening to her close friend. To imagine that she could have been visiting with Eugenia and then happened to call with her on her fiancé and met Charles again! Jane tried not to dwell on the idea that perhaps they weren't meant to meet again. Then she tried to tell herself that she didn't want to meet with him again after all the pain he caused by trifling with her feelings. Still, she glowed at the praise Miss Kilpatrick spoke of Mr. Bingley.

They chatted together for a few more minutes, the topic settling on the safe subject of how much they had raised from selling their goods. They were soon interrupted by a young couple inspecting some of Jane's handiwork. Miss Kilpatrick did not mention Mr. Bingley again and Jane consoled herself with the thought that she did not wish to hear of him.

It was a long, but ultimately fruitful day. The charity fair raised a record amount and the older ladies gave the dues to Jane and Eugenia. Mrs. Gardiner smiled and was happy for her niece to be taking a more proactive role in her stay in London and thought that perhaps she could convince Mr. Gardiner to procure seats at one of the theatres.

Jane smiled and was content to be lead home after the few unsold items were stored for the next fair. She listened to Mrs. Gardiner speak of her day and the success of the fundraiser and of her plans for a night at the theatre. It was only until she retired after supper that Jane shed a few tears for herself and then resolved again to think no more on Mr. Bingley.

Darcy paced his room agonising over the thought of Miss Elizabeth Bennet. He had struggled with his feelings for so long, he had used every possible reason not to marry her but still he was tortured by her face, her laughter, her scent. Every time he thought that he had conquered his desire, he would bump into her on one of his walks or meet her for dinner as the Hunsford party was invited to dine with them, or her name would come up in conversation with Fitzwilliam. He was now resigned to the fact that these chance encounters were meant to be. That they were meant to be. He listed the reasons again for not pursuing her, but they were nothing compared to the strong attachment he felt for her.

He knew she had not arrived with the rest of her party. He had been looking out of a window to watch her approach. He enjoyed seeing her unguarded, where he could be free to smile at her beauty and vivaciousness. He was often amused that she would approach the house gently teasing her unsuspecting cousin whilst sharing amused glances with her friend. She was natural, she was delightful and she would be his as soon as he claimed her.

He told his valet that he needed a walk around Rosings before joining the party for dinner. He knew from experience that Mr. Collins' speeches of gratitude would go for at least a half an hour, and then his Aunt would spend just as long remonstrating with him about some aspect of the morning's sermon and giving a dose of her officious advice for the next sermon as well as how Mrs. Collins should run her household.

He had plenty of time to dash off to the parsonage, claim Elizabeth as his own and then present her to their acquaintances as the future Mrs. Darcy. Or perhaps I should wait until I ask her father's blessing. Yes, that would be preferable, for then I should have Elizabeth to myself without ceremony for a little while. He thought a bit more about the merit of the idea. It may also require softening the blow for Aunt Catherine. I would much rather not expose Elizabeth to the full displeasure of my Aunt until I've had time to explain to my Aunt my resolve to marry despite her objections, and to explain to Elizabeth how she should handle the criticism without displeasing Lady Catherine more. He considered for a bit longer as he approached the parsonage door. Yes, that would be just the thing.

Opening the door, Darcy had not really thought beyond his own feelings to what the lady herself might say to his proposals, therefore it came as a complete shock when she simply and shortly refused him. After a short pause to digest the information, he tried to calmly and rationally explain why he liked her against his own better judgement and to hint at why it would be a good thing for her to accept him.

It did not end well. Instead of returning to Rosings assured that she would be his, he stormed into his rooms, brushing Colonel Fitzwilliam's and Lady Catherine's inquiries aside and fumed. He started pacing the room again. After a few turns, the reality of the situation was fully felt- he never had had Elizabeth to think of as his future wife and he probably never would. He stumbled into the nearest chair and buried his head in his arms.

Chapter Three: Altered Behaviours

Posted on 2009-02-03

Miss Georgiana Darcy nodded briefly to the doorman as she entered the Darcy Townhouse. Mrs. Annesley excused herself to rest for a while. A rest Georgiana thought she deserved: they had just been through one of the most ghastly days imaginable. Firstly, the milliner had not finished with the new bonnet she had purchased and then there had been the necessary return visit to be paid to Miss Bingley and her sister at the Hursts. That had been an awful experience. Miss Bingley had spent half the time praising herself or Mr. Darcy and hinting at how great an alliance between Caroline and Fitzwilliam would be. The second half of the conversation had been about Mr. Bingley and how interested he had recently become at managing his affairs. They said it was a sure sign that he was thinking of matrimony to a worthy young lady, and then winked at her! Her!! Georgiana sincerely hoped they had no serious designs on a match between Mr. Bingley and herself. He was a bit too… affable for her tastes. Not really anything like her brother, or Mr. Wickham, although she was not allowed to think on him favourably anymore, nor did she want to a lot of the times. Who was she kidding? She still held a soft spot for dear George Wickham and a bit of resentment at her brother for sending him off. He did not even explain his reasons to her. That's because I'm too young Georgiana thought bitterly. She was always too young for explanations. At least George hadn't thought she was too young for marriage.

But he really had been shallow if he had just fled without any good bye or any strong stand to oppose her brother. She wanted a strong man, someone who would love her so much that nothing would stand in her way. She paused, How did I get onto the subject of George Wickham? she shook her head and sighed Oh well, it is just another irritant today.

Passing through the hallway and casually glancing into the drawing room she was surprised to see two men- her brother and cousin- seated and drinking brandy. They had not noticed her and so, indulging in a childish pastime, she listened near the door, thankful that Mrs. Annesley was not here to scold her.

"You are being too harsh upon yourself Darce." Her cousin Colonel Fitzwilliam was saying. "You have a right to a certain amount of pride in your situation and your responsibilities. I would not say it is the end of your prospects. If you cannot win the lady back, look elsewhere! There are an abundance of ladies out there who would snap up the chance to become Mrs. Darcy."

She heard her brother sigh, the way he did when he thought someone didn't understand his point.

"I was scathing in my judgement of her family and situation in life and especially her mother and younger sisters and I was rude in my address. She has a very low opinion of me, mainly due to my interfering behaviour with Mr. Bingley and her sister and" he dipped his voice so she only just managed to hear "George Wickham."

"Him!" The Colonel exclaimed viciously. "How does he keep rearing his ugly head into your business?"

Georgiana was intensely interested at this point. Obviously Fitzwilliam had proposed to a young lady and she had not wanted him! She wasn't sure what was meant about Mr. Bingley and the lady's sister, but some how she had an acquaintance with George Wickham. Georgiana struggled with a wave of jealousy. To think that not three months later, he was courting another woman's favour! Georgiana added that to her list of list of reasons why she shouldn't feel for Mr. Wickham anymore.

"He joined the regiment there." Her brother was continuing.

"Wickham! In the Army! Oh that is too precious." Colonel Fitzwilliam rubbed his hands with glee. "What would have induced him to enter into a position where I have a sway and many connections in the upper ranks? He will never make anything above Officer if I have my way. In fact, whose regiment was it? I might just see if I can get Wickham a transfer to see some real action. Put him out of harm's way."

"No, I will not let you sentence him to a probable death, even if he is a liability running loose, preying on young women. I shall keep an eye on him, and you shall too. Just don't abuse your authority. Let's give him a chance to redeem himself. My father would have been seriously upset to see his godson on the front lines, and I must respect my father's regard for him."

"But Darcy!" The Colonel spluttered "He gave up all rights to any particular help from you by Uncle Darcy after refusing the living he had in store for him, then squandering the generous amount of money you gave him- in such a short time as well! Next he is clamouring for more, and you pay off his debts yet again, although luckily you didn't give him any more money. To repay you, he seduces Georgiana for her inheritance. It really is not your place to defend him anymore. Let the world see George Wickham for a scoundrel and have done with him."

Georgiana was shocked. Did George love her merely for her dowry? Did George love her then at all? Impossible- he wouldn't have kissed her if he didn't love her. Georgiana refused to believe that the man she was still attached to was never really attached to her at all, but the truth sunk in. Her cousin would never have lied to her brother in such an open and frank conversation, when he thought there would be no one to hear except her brother. Tears formed and her throat choked up. She gathered her skirts and hurried up the stairs where she flung herself on the bed and cried herself to sleep for the last time over George Wickham.

Darcy stood pacing worriedly after hearing that his sister refused to come down for dinner.

"I should go up and see what the matter is."

"I wouldn't worry Darcy, she probably has a headache or some other such nonsense females go through every now and then." The Colonel replied "Let's dine and you can send up a plate for her later."

Darcy reluctantly agreed. Ever since the Hunsford proposal, he was more acutely aware of his failings, and he had failed to be around Georgiana and support her as a loving brother since the Ramsgate incident. The Colonel, although joint guardian and therefore privy to all the details, never saw Georgiana as anything more than a childish girl who needed presents every so often. That was the extent of his guardianship, which placed that much more of a burden on Darcy. In the Colonel's defence, he was away for most times of the year and there was an even greater gap between Georgiana's and his ages, but Darcy sometimes wished that they were closer. Georgiana really needed a confidant, and as far as his inquiries with Mrs. Annesley, she had not confided in her. She needs a sister, someone like Elizabeth. He thought sadly.

"Stop thinking about her and eat your food." The Colonel enjoyed teasing his cousin, and even now, when he knew that his cousin really was hurting over the affair, he refused to stop the tradition. The Colonel's own private opinion was that he felt for his cousin, Miss Elizabeth Bennet was a lovely young lady and it was a pity that she refused him, but if it were him, he would quickly push her out of his mind and simply move on. Preferably to someone slightly more well endowed financially.

"I know you Darcy, you don't get over people and incidents like I do. Therefore the only thing for it is to reconcile Bingley and her sister. You said that you had enlightened her on Wickham's true character, and I think that she is too intelligent not to believe your letter, no matter what you say. Go back to her, ask for her forgiveness and offer your heart on a platter again. This time, make sure that she will say yes however. It may require a bit of wooing and work on your behalf, but I really think that she will be absolutely perfect for you. And for Georgiana."

He knew he had hit a nerve when he saw Darcy look up sharply.

"Seriously, Darcy, I think Georgiana is as good at bottling up her emotions as you. She is only young and may have all sorts of interesting notions running around in her head. Don't treat her as a child, but don't expect her to behave as a grown up. She is not as mature as you assume, and this is not necessarily a bad thing. I think she needs some sort of female companionship- unpaid female companionship if you understand my meaning."

Darcy nodded thoughtfully. His sister always seemed all right, but he never really looked under the surface. He knew she enjoyed music, and so made sure she had enough music and teaching as she felt necessary. It had been an awful shock to find out about Wickham and her proposed elopement. She had become withdrawn since then, and even though she expressed fond feelings for him whenever he visited, he did not really know his sister as much as he used to when they were little and she would confide in him all her little ideas and thoughts.

He would have to think about what he should do with regards to Bingley, Elizabeth and his sister.

The rest of the meal was finished in silence, Darcy, deep in thought, and Colonel Fitzwilliam enjoying the change from a rowdy and crowded mess hall.

Darcy was surprised to learn that Bingley was not at home the next morning when he called. Leaving his card, he went to his club, thinking that perhaps Bingley would be there. When he found out that he wasn't there, Darcy remained for a half an hour to catch up on any interesting news and then returned to his own Townhouse.

He inquired if Miss Georgiana had been seen downstairs and when answered in the negative, he went to her rooms and knocked on her door. There was a muffled "Who is it?" from inside and when he replied, a minute later, Georgiana opened the door. She was fully dressed and looked as if she were just about to leave.

"Oh hello Fitzwilliam, sorry for not coming down for dinner yesterday, but I had a terrible headache. Thank you for the plate you sent up, I hope I ate enough to satisfy both Cook and you." Her smile looked a bit strained. "I was just about to check on a new bonnet I had ordered. Shall I see you later today?"

Darcy moved to block her. "Georgie," he pronounced her old play name they used when young and her expression softened. "I know I haven't been around much lately for you to confide in me, but if there is anything troubling you that you would like to discuss, then I am here now and more than willing to hear you."

Georgiana gave a genuine smile. "Thank you brother, but I need some time to think on my own, and I really do need to pick up that bonnet! Perhaps this afternoon?"

"Whenever you are ready my dear." Darcy replied.

"Of course, and the same goes for you, brother dear. If ever you need to talk to someone other than our cousin the Colonel, you can always confide in me." She smiled impishly, leaving Darcy to wonder if she had somehow overheard or guessed not only that something was troubling him, but what that something was.

Elizabeth gratefully removed her bonnet and settled comfortably into the lush grass. They had all finished having afternoon tea with Lady Catherine, who again wanted the Hunsford party to visit more than twice a week, since her nephews had left her all alone. Elizabeth had endured the inanities of the conversation and caught herself wishing those nephews hadn't left. Thoughts of a nephew drew her attention to the letters in her hand. One was a crumpled, well-read missive from Mr. Darcy and the other was her most recent letter from Jane.

Putting Mr. Darcy's eye-opening letter aside, she opened Jane's which had arrived early this morning. Lizzy had saved this to soothe her still distraught nerves. She had hoped that it would calm her with Jane's usual happy optimism…

My dearest Lizzy,

How have your last few weeks been? I hope our cousin and Charlotte and Maria are in health. My aunt and uncle and dear nephew and nieces have all been very patient with me in my recent trial. But I will come to that later.

I hope you have not been fighting with Mr. Darcy for the entire time. Please convey my regards to him when you see him next. I have recently been thinking of these last few months critically, and I do not think that Mr. Darcy was as impartial as you believe. He was definitely not as disapproving of you, notwithstanding his first ill-comments regarding you, as you were so wont to believe. I have my suspicions that he thought highly of you. After all, he favoured you among all our acquaintance with a dance at Netherfield, he constantly sought your opinions on subjects, and even though you often disagreed, he did not deride you for your differences.

I do not say these things so that you may think that he has a higher regard that he may- I do not want you to suddenly go from such a strong dislike to thinking yourself attached to him merely because he solicited your company, but rather to show you that I have been thinking about his behaviour and his friend's and Miss Bingley's.

With regards to the shocking news that Mr. Wickham spread about Mr. Darcy, I am regretting my haste to think that he was speaking the truth. I know I tried to make them both good, but I have since had time to consider this as well, and I am more and more suspicious of Mr. Wickham's motives. Why tell you so suddenly- the first day of your acquaintance? Why confide such personal information about himself and Mr. Darcy to an almost stranger, however pretty and intelligent? Why did he only confide in you because he dared not make it public for love of his Godfather, and then when Mr. Darcy had left, he made it public! Oh Lizzy, I am not trying to convince you one way or the other, especially since I do not know all the particulars, but I wish for you to scrutinise both men's actions, and their behaviour and general characters. Put aside your dislike of one and partiality for the other and look at it objectively. Mr. Darcy may be proud and reserved, but he has done nothing dishonourable to deserve such strong prejudice from you.

I am so glad that you are coming to London soon- I wish to go home once more and lose myself in walks and groves to think about my life and what I can do for others. I have enjoyed my stay in London, and have assisted my Aunt in a charitable Fair- I donated and sold a few of my embroidered handkerchiefs and linens. I have also recently made a friend called Eugenia Kilpatrick, who is soon to marry. Last night I went to the theatre with my aunt and uncle and Eugenia and her fiancé and it was a magnificent play if a bit confusing at times, called A School For Scandal.

I yearn for you to be by me again and laugh at me and tell me I am being nonsensical. I wish for the quiet life to pause and review. I have been coming to a decision and I would like to discuss it with you and papa, but I will wait until you are here to listen to me in person.

You may wonder at the change in me. I will explain how it came about. I spoke to you of Miss Bingley returning my call later than she should have, and that afternoon I spent some time reflecting on her behaviour. I had just received your letter criticising Miss Bingley's tardiness, and I realised then how much she did not wish to be in my company, how I had been deluding myself that she was an intimate friend and would want me for a sister, for I do now confess that I had been hoping that Mr. Bingley would make me an offer. The fact that Mr. Bingley did not call, knowing I was in town, and did not even pass a simple hello via his sister, hurt me more than I had thought possible. I was in love with Mr. Bingley, and it pained me to feel so discarded by him.

You may have noticed the past tense. I am not completely sure that I have convinced myself I am not in love with Mr. Bingley anymore, and to be truthful, there still remains a few vestiges within me that thrill to hear his name, or think of past pleasures with him. I am struggling powerfully against this inclination to hope however as I would have in the past. I also do find myself reproaching him and his sister for their behaviour towards myself.

Yes, my dear Lizzy, I said the word reproach. Your sweet innocent Jane is no longer blinded by the inconsistencies, follies and poor behaviour of others. She is not quite so sweet, nor as innocent as she once was either.

I cannot write any further. I wanted to unburden myself to you however and warn you that there has been a change so that you are not too shocked. A fuller account will simply have to wait until you are here by my side.

Until then, I remain, as always,

Your Jane.

Elizabeth sat in silence, processing what she had just read in Jane's letter. To see her sister show such clarity of thought with regards to Mr. Darcy and Wickham without being privy to all the details that Elizabeth knew shamed her own wilful prejudice. Again Elizabeth, who had prided herself with her clear judgement, never knew herself until this moment, when the words from Mr. Darcy's letter and Jane's all pointed to her own blindness. What would have happened had she read Jane's letter before Mr. Darcy's proposal? Elizabeth was certain it would not change the essential answer, but perhaps would have softened her refusal. It did not sit well with her to think of her words and actions to that particular gentleman that day.

It pained her to read on, and find out that Jane was hurting and continuing to suffer at the hands of Miss Bingley and her brother. At least, Elizabeth had the knowledge that Jane was mistaken in thinking that Mr. Bingley knew of her being in Town and consciously ignoring her. Elizabeth had decided to only reveal part of Mr. Darcy's letter, but she now saw that Jane would be strong enough; she would be heartened by the entirety of Mr. Darcy's letter. She had some misgivings because it might make Jane hope for Mr. Bingley, but this newly awakened Jane almost demanded that Elizabeth no longer protect her. It was a new experience for Elizabeth to find that her older sister had taken the more traditional role of guiding her. That Jane was being older and wiser and fairer, although in the latter, Jane always had an advantage.

Elizabeth read through her letter twice more, and then turned her attention back to Mr. Darcy's letter. How heartily she was ashamed of her blindness with regards to Wickham, of her prejudice against Mr. Darcy and she finally conceded that she had wilfully misled herself in the characters of both men. It was then that she fully realised the compliment of such a man as Mr. Darcy's attentions and love… how ardently I admire and love you. Elizabeth regretted her passionate and total rejection, although she did not regret the rejection itself. She reflected again on his wishes for her health and happiness at the end of the horrible interview, and then his adieu at the end of the letter, and wondered that such a man as Mr. Darcy, to be humbled so completely, could be gracious and generous in the midst of his own disappointment. In that sense, he reminded her of Jane.

Although what new Jane awaited her now? She grieved for Jane, and her dear sister's rude awakening made Jane's heartache all the more pitiable. Elizabeth looked forward to the day that she would be reunited and the sisters could heal each other with their friendship.

The reunion, so long desired between sisters, was as bittersweet and touching as they had both imagined. Elizabeth, tired after her journey, was welcomed by a smiling Jane who was truly happy to see her. Uncle and Aunt Gardiner wisely bade them an early good night and sent the sisters to their bedchamber to reacquaint themselves with each others' past weeks, whilst they attempted to entertain Maria Lucas before she, too, retired early. After revealing her surprise meeting with Miss Bingley and her other revelations, Jane at last felt some peace in knowing that someone knew exactly how she felt and the burden could be shared somewhat. Elizabeth in turn, revealed her own surprising discovery of Mr. Darcy's feelings for her, and hesitantly showed Jane the letter. Lizzy had thought that perhaps the best place for the letter should be at home, but it all came rushing out at once as she unburdened her own heart.

Jane had been surprised by the intensity of Mr. Darcy's feelings for Elizabeth, and agreed that his acknowledgement of those feelings was extremely bad. She did not reproach Elizabeth for refusing him, or for her warm defence of Mr. Wickham. Upon knowing of Mr. Bingley's unawareness of her being in town, she did not know what to think. At once, the faint glimmer of hope glowed within her, but later, upon careful reflection, she still maintained even to her sister, that some blame needed to fall at Mr. Bingley's feet.

"For Lizzy," Jane smiled sadly as she tucked her feet under her on their bed. "As you said, how could someone so much in love be convinced otherwise, even if by two sisters and a friend? I agree that they take the majority of the blame, they acted dishonestly, but perhaps Mr. Darcy has some claim to sympathy. He was trying to protect his friend from a loveless marriage- a marriage that might bring shame and degradation on him. If Mr. Bingley was dissuaded on those grounds, how awful would it have been to marry him and then have him begrudge me and my family? Perhaps I should have been more forthcoming with my affections." Jane pondered for a while, forestalling Lizzy's attempts to clear her of blame.

"No," Jane decided. "I gave Mr. Bingley all my attention, I smiled, I was pleased. I did not act improperly but with society's strictures in mind. If I had not, Mr. Darcy would have pointed to my inappropriate behaviour as reason against marrying me. There was no way I could have succeeded in gaining their approbation- they would have found fault in something to use against me. Mr. Bingley, I am sure, knew of my affections. To be so dependent on another's opinions, to be so unsure of oneself! Could you imagine how the estate would have been run!"

"Oh Jane, you have surpassed me entirely in your clarity, because you are so fair and unprejudiced. How I wish I could have had such unbiased and charitable thoughts with my dealings, especially with Mr. Darcy. I was caught unawares by his attentions, refusing to listen to Charlotte's hints and I was deceived by my prejudice against him, by allowing Mr. Wickham's attention to flatter me and increase my hatred of Mr. Darcy."

She leaned over and kissed Jane on the cheek. Jane let her head rest on her sister's shoulder and started crying gently, sorrowfully, saying goodbye to her past self and her past hopes.

The sisters drew consolation from each other.

In another section of Town, two other siblings were getting to know each other better after a period of estrangement. Darcy and his sister were seated in the music room, to all appearances perfectly happy with each other. Beneath the surface, however, was a completely different matter. Georgiana had spent her morning busying herself with inconsequential purchases, trying to fill the void that was forming in her after she had emptied herself of her infatuation with George Wickham. She was also terribly embarrassed and feeling extremely foolish. This fuelled her resentment towards her brother. The brother that offered no explanations of his interference with her love, apart from a superficial explanation of why George Wickham was not worthy. The brother that had then hired a new companion for his sister and set her up in London with exclusive music teachers and filled her day with practise and guided lessons. The brother that acted more like a father, a father who showed no real affection and no opening to let her pour out her broken heart to him. Instead, he goes off and enjoys himself with his friend Bingley in a completely separate part of the country.

Darcy on the other side, worried about how much Georgiana knew about his tender regards for a woman and whether she knew the humiliating truth that he had been rejected. He fought with the sense of humiliation, and that he should not feel this in front of his sister. The sister he had reared and provided for when their father died. The sister that should be grateful and supportive and dutiful. As he brooded more on it, the silence stretched in the room, until suddenly he realised how easily he had slipped into his old self, how easily he was thinking of his sister completely from his own perspective, and not from hers. How much this was a similar situation to his dealings with Elizabeth.

He could not dwell on her for too long, otherwise he would not be able to concentrate on the task at hand: trying to bridge the gap that had unknowingly formed between his sister and himself.

"How have you been Georgiana?" He asked by way of a beginning. "Is Mrs. Annesley a suitable companion for you?"

Georgiana swallowed a resentful retort regarding Mrs. Annesley being viewed as more of a governess than a companion. She was surprised at her vehemence, Georgiana loved her brother, but found his high-handed behaviour hard to endure, especially when she was not quite grown up, she was not yet out, but still expected to be. Georgianna was caught in the trying age, hovering between childhood and womanhood and had no one to guide her and the Darcy pride in believing she did not need help. Tears sprang unbidden to her eyes, her emotions were still in turmoil of dealing with a broken heart she thought healed months ago. Swallowing them down, Fitzwilliam had not noticed thank goodness, and waiting until her voice was steady, she raised her eyes to his and spoke with apparent calmness touching on boredom that she was perfectly well.

"No Georgiana, I am not inquiring about your health, nor your studies, but how are you?" He moved to bridge the gap between their positions.

The gentleness in his voice disarmed her, and the way he took her hands in his and earnestly looked at her reminded her so much of their youth, when she was not ten and he would come in after a nightmare and patiently calm her down. Georgiana's emotions, new and old became overwhelming, and she buried her face against his shoulders and wept.

Darcy patted her shoulder and looked around, dazed. It was not quite the response he had envisaged, and he was not sure what to do. Why is she crying? Darcy worried, and continued to worry after five minutes of continuous sobbing. Smoothing her hair, he gathered her in his arms as he did long ago after her nightmares.

After some time, when Georgiana had spent herself in tears and found herself with the clarity that comes after emotion is drained fully. She still felt justified in some of her annoyances with her brother, but saw her resentment as something that would only grow and come between their relationship. If he, being older and never having had anyone but their flighty cousin to confide in, did not wish to make her a confidant, she could not fault him. She could not cope with her own emotions, what would she do with his?

Taking the proffered handkerchief, Georgiana smiled up at her brother.

"It has been a long time since you have done that Georgie."

"It has been a long time since you offered, brother."

Darcy nodded sombrely. He had failed her, and he realised that she also felt that he had failed her.

"Thank you Fitzwilliam. I fear I have only yet fully recovered from my failed elopement with… Wickham" she finished softly.

Darcy sat up straighter in alarm. He had never imagined that she would still be pining after him. How did that man manage to have such a strong affect on ladies?

"But, Georgie! It has been over three months! Surely…"

"So what?" Georgiana interrupted sharply and Darcy glowered with disapproval of her interruption. "Do you think hearts mend quickly brother? That you can turn off strong feelings for someone? Especially with no reason as to why you should. Do you imagine that it is merely wishing it to be over for it to be over? I tell you that it is not so simple. It is a gradual realisation of their abandonment and a slow healing of the ache they left in their place."

Georgiana warmed to her topic, and pulled away from Darcy, growing strength as she released her own experience. She stood.

"Although I have not been regretting his company for many months now, there is a remembrance of what it was like to have someone seemingly so devoted. For sharing much of your thoughts and times and experiences with another, and now having no one. That is missed, independent of missing the person. It is a lonely process. I once thought I was lonely sometimes before my experience, but after having, for even only a few weeks, someone, the absence makes you realise what it is to be alone."

Darcy grew apprehensive about his own situation, and what Georgiana's experiences had led her to think and feel. Would he feel this way without Elizabeth? She had never given him any devotion however. He still felt lonely because she never would now.

Georgiana continued.

"There is no going back to your old self: you are irrevocably changed. You can go back to your old thoughts and routines and even pick up some of your dreams, but you have changed. Life seems for a long time colourless and dull. It is horrible."

Darcy tried to comfort her, but again she had not finished.

"I also recently heard new information regarding his attachment to me." Here she paused and looked defiantly at her brother.

"You overheard our conversation yesterday!" Darcy was not pleased.

"I did."

"You had absolutely no right to listen to a conversation that had nothing to do with you."

"You spoke of George Wickham! It concerned me."

"What did you hear Georgiana?"

"I heard what you should have told me before, Fitzwilliam. I heard the truth about him. That he never cared for me at all! That he was not simply too weak to stand up against you, but that he never loved me, that he used me for my money and as some sort of vengeance against you."

"Of course he never loved you Georgiana!" he rose in amazement. "How you could think he did, I cannot comprehend."

Georgiana was taken aback by this statement. It infuriated her and her resentment slipped.

"Why should I not think he cared for me? He called on me every day and spent hours amusing me. He told me that he loved me, and he showed me that he did by his wanting to be with me and being attentive to my needs. He was there. You never said anything otherwise about our old friend, so why should I not have been charmed and believe?"

The similarity in the situation of Georgiana not being warned about Wickham and subsequently charmed by him and then Elizabeth being unaware of their history, except for what Wickham revealed was not lost on Darcy. Yet, he had found it easier to tell the truth to Elizabeth, someone who he wanted closer to him, but was not in reality, than his own sister, who was flesh and blood.

"I dislike laying my private actions on a table for public view" he began falteringly, perhaps realising for the first time just how much his pride had cost him.

"Telling me is not public view!" Georgiana burst in wearily. It seemed that her brother was not able to understand her need to be included and confided in. There being only two of them in the immediate family, they should have shared a stronger bond, and to outward appearances, they did. When in company, brother and sister were united and whole. By themselves, they were separated by a gulf of their own making.

"I did not think you would ever meet him again Georgiana. Why would you? He had bankrupted himself and crawled back for more funds above what I had granted him instead of the living and I refused."

"More?" Georgiana shook her head in confusion. "You never allowed Wickham any money after Father died- you cut him off from his old allowance…" Realisation dawned that more than his affection was a lie.

Darcy looked at his sister uncomprehendingly. She had believed his lies? She had no knowledge of what Wickham did and got up to before he found the ultimate way of hurting Darcy.

"Georgie, we need to talk."

Darcy took her by the hand, and led her back to the sofa. He seated himself next to her, never letting go of her hand, and slowly, gently recounted the tale of Wickham for a second female dear to his heart in the span of a week.

Georgiana listened, and her heart listened and learnt, and started healing. She grew to understand that there was no real need to heal after Wickham because he had not been worth knowing or loving. The ache of not having someone around, would still be something she would struggle with, but in time she knew she would overcome it and find peace again by herself, and then hopefully would come to love another who would fill that void.

They spent some moments in silence after Darcy's confession and both used the opportunity to understand the other, and understand their own flaws. Darcy understood that he had treated his sister as a porcelain doll- he had thought her precious and beautiful but also fragile and to be kept out of harms way, and in doing so, had put her on the shelf out of his sight. She still was all those things, but he hoped to have her at his side once more to journey with as a sister and friend.

Georgiana saw that her honourable brother carried many burdens and responsibilities, and although he was overbearingly protective, she innately understood where it came from, and for once did not resent it. Smiling the first real smile in a year, she gazed on her brother with sisterly affection akin to that which she used to feel as a child. Her brother, her hero who would look after her and love her, however she wanted to be woman enough for him to confide in and not be constantly reminded of the more than 10 years gap in their ages.

As the morning passed with brother and sister working towards a better understanding, Mrs. Annesley inquired as to her charge: it was time for her history lesson. Darcy looked speculatively at Georgiana as her nose wrinkled slightly and informed Mrs. Annesley that Georgiana was required elsewhere for the afternoon, and that she could have the day to herself.

"Thank you brother!" Georgiana sighed in relief, "You do not understand how boring Mrs. Annesley and history can be! Not to mention she is not my governess!"

Darcy frowned at her petulance, but restricted himself to a gentle reprimand of the benefit of knowledge.

"Is your lady-love terribly knowledgeable?" Georgie smirked.

"Yes, she's the most…" then he blinked. "Lady love? Just how much of the conversation did you overhear last night Georgiana?" Darcy demanded.

"Enough to know that you liked a lady whilst visiting my Aunt in Kent." and that she refused you! thought Georgiana with a little bit of spite. Sometimes her brother was too proud in himself.

Darcy did not know what to do or say, he was not used to discussing certain subjects with his sister, especially not himself, and yet that is precisely why there had been such a barrier in their relationship. He disliked the idea of laying bare his heart, especially to a sister that still was much younger than him and, as Fitzwilliam noted last night, was not as mature as he would have wished. Elizabeth would have been good for Georgiana

"She still would." He murmured.

"Who is she? I know it cannot be Miss Bingley, for she was in London calling on me incessantly."

Darcy could not help grimacing in distaste.

"No, definitely not Miss Bingley!" The siblings shared a smile. "She is a Miss Elizabeth Bennet of Longbourn from Hertfordshire. I met her when I visited Charles' new estate and then again when in Kent. She was visiting a friend who had recently married our Aunt's vicar."

Georgiana almost choked on the tea she had started sipping. "Someone married him!?"

"Georgie, you will have to learn how to control your emotions better before coming out!" Darcy laughed.

Georgie stuck her tongue out at him, enjoying the playfulness of their exchange.

"I enjoyed her company very much, and although there was some misunderstanding between us, I hope that one day I shall introduce you to her as your future sister."

"Really Fitzwilliam!? You are planning on marrying! Well who is she? When did she come out? I have never heard of the Bennets or Longbourn."

"Her family, although genteel, do not move in the highest circles, nor even come to London very often."

Georgiana raised her eyebrow at her brother. Marrying beneath them? What would the family think?

"But our Father, Fitzwilliam, recommended that you find a woman of similar fortune, breeding and standing. Would he approve your choice? There is more to marriage than a pretty face!"

Darcy was taken aback by Georgiana's questions. He never expected her, of all people, to be concerned with society or rank and wealth, especially considering Wickham. Yet were these not the questions he had been struggling with over the last few months?

He felt indignant on Elizabeth's behalf and then understood how very insulting he had been in his declaration and how much more reason Elizabeth had to be insulted by his mode of declaration and choice of words. It shocked him that he had never thought of her throughout the interview, of her feelings or thoughts. He had never thought himself to be a selfish brute, but now had reason to suppose that he was generally so: with regards to Elizabeth and Georgiana, he had not put them before himself.

"You almost gave your hand to a steward's son, is Miss Elizabeth Bennet, a gentleman's daughter, albeit from the country, worse?"

Georgiana's eyes widened at her brother's admonition. There are a lot of things I need to think of and realise and apply to my own life Georgiana sighed to herself. She lowered her eyes humbly.

"I love her Georgie." The words were spoke quietly, wondrously, as if Darcy could not countenance how such a thing occurred. Indeed he could not.

"I thought I loved Wickham brother."

Their eyes met and Darcy saw the naked hurt in Georgiana's eyes and mourned for her. Georgiana saw the strength, love and determination in Darcy's and understood that his love was purer and more enduring than hers had been.

"Congratulations then brother, when do I wish you joy?"

"Not until I have won Elizabeth's hand." Darcy moved uncomfortably in his chair, "for the lady, you see, does not love me and will not have me. I shall win her however! These last few days have shown me how intolerable life is without even the chance that she could be mine. I was wrong in my addresses to her and I have made some mistakes, but I cannot believe it is not irretrievable, that I cannot win her regard and that I will not ever call her Mrs. Darcy and make her mine."

Georgiana sat in awe at her brother's passionate feelings for this unknown woman.

"I hope you do, brother. Now tell me exactly how she bewitched you so completely."

She could not help smiling as her brother's features softened and he glowed as he recounted her numerous beauties and virtues.

"Bingley!" Darcy cried.

Bingley's smile was wide as he clasped his friend's hand heartily.

"Ah, Darcy, come in! How was your trip to Rosings?" He motioned to the leather chair opposite his.

"Not bad, Bingley" Not good either he thought to himself. "I tried calling here yesterday, but you were out?" Darcy wanted to draw as much attention away from himself as possible.

Darcy did not come here to confess anything in particular to Bingley, merely to renew his friendship and see how his friend was faring. So far, he was relieved with what he saw. Although convinced that perhaps a sister's understanding was better than his own, Darcy was by no means ready to admit any mistakes with regards Miss Jane Bennet's true feelings and have Bingley impetuously rushing off to Netherfield. He wasn't even sure if Miss Bennet was even there- she could still be in London.

"Yes, I was visiting with a gentleman about some fabrics." Bingley wore a wide grin, "You will never guess what I have been up to whilst you've been away."

Darcy was mystified and expressed himself to be so.

"I've decided that I need to take my own fortune into my hands and have regained control over my father's warehouses and started collecting together a superb team to carry on his legacy."

Darcy could not have been more surprised than if Bingley had suggested that he was going to relinquish his fortune and become a manservant for a nabob in India.

"I thought you were pursuing a life as a gentleman, like your father wished for you to be?" Darcy inquired.

"I am still a gentleman Darcy, I do no hard labour, but I refuse to sit idle. You have your estates and farming, I have my warehouses and trading to keep me occupied. The Board my father put in place still retains a majority control. I try to keep abreast of the latest news and spend a few hours each day in earnest contemplation of how to improve my business. I have bi-weekly meetings with various people, including taking an active role in the Board Meetings held monthly. I do not see how different it is to your own responsibilities, it is simply in another field that is less acceptable by society."

Darcy's amazement increased, not only with what Bingley was saying, but the material change in Bingley's attitude and responsibilities. Despite the twinges of alarm, Darcy was impressed.

"I am all astonishment, Bingley. May I ask how this came about?"

"Certainly you can, and I will inform you, but firstly, would you like something to drink, I have a tendency to rattle on and therefore you will most likely prefer to have something in your hand to occupy yourself with."

Darcy simply nodded, not knowing what else to do.

There was a knock at the door and Alexander Croydon walked in.

"Charles, congratulations on your success with that new idea of Tobs for cloth! My sources said it was a smashing success at the fair and rumour has it that you closed the deal with… oh forgive me, I didn't realise you had a guest." He paused to smile pleasantly at Darcy, who was wondering who the devil this person was and what he was jabbering on about.

"Alex, this is my good friend Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy. Darcy, Mr. Alexander Croydon."

The gentlemen shook hands.

"Ah so this is the famous Darcy! A pleasure sir! Bingley has nothing but the highest praise for you and your friendship."

"Thank you, I'm sure." Darcy replied a little less than amiably. He was slightly put out with Bingley for forming friends that Darcy knew nothing of nor had any contact with. Was Croydon the reason for Bingley's sudden interest in an occupation? Although Darcy was fairly happy with Bingley's newfound purpose in life, he wasn't so sure of the idea of someone else giving him advice.

"Croydon, sit down! Would you like a drink? I was just about to explain to Darcy what I've been up to while he has been in the country."

The three sat down and Bingley slowly related his ideas without going into the initial reason for requiring some form of occupation. Bingley wasn't sure how much Darcy would be displeased with his resolve to win Jane Bennet's hand in marriage when he became more certain of himself. He still wasn't sure how strong he would be if Darcy had any further objections or made a very determined effort to stop Bingley. Better to finish up in Town for another few weeks, then I'll have the Board in place and the business in hand, so that I could leave Town for a month and see how Netherfield is doing and whether Jane Bennet still cares for me. There shall be enough time to tell him sometime in the coming weeks.

The next week found Darcy becoming increasingly bored. After the first day of catching up with work with his steward and going through the correspondence he hadn't asked to be forwarded to Rosings, he found himself at a loss of what to do. Usually he would call upon Bingley and the two would go off to their club and while away their time with billiards, chess, fencing, but Bingley was increasingly busy with managing his business. The few times he had managed to see him, it was briefly, and often in the company of Croydon. Once or twice, Croydon had beaten him to calling on Bingley and had whisked him away to his own club, of which Bingley was now a member as well.

Colonel Fitzwilliam had rejoined his regiment and was busy preparing to leave for –shire. Georgiana would spend her mornings in her studies and the afternoons doing a spot of shopping or visiting her Aunt Matlock. Darcy occasionally accompanied her on these trips as something to do, although he felt awkward and out of place in a parlour sipping tea. His relationship with Georgiana slowly mended and they spent quiet evenings together. She would often play for him and he would remember another young lady whom he would like to hear perform again, especially in such an intimate family setting. Georgiana saw her brother become more and more sad and uninterested and was at a loss to help him. She too was aching for kind attentions and they both seemed too wrapped up in their own personal grief and loneliness to think about helping the other. This did not build up further barriers however as they also silently shared in each other's grief.

Then there were the times when Darcy ventured out to the fencing master by himself and the many walks around St James' park, and of course his horse required daily exercise. But by the end of the second week, Darcy was thoroughly bored and didn't know what to do. He had formed a very small circle of friends, as he was shy and haughty. Those who would have approached him were put off by his cold and distant demeanour and those who weren't, were the mama's and daughter's he abhorred.

The extra time on his hands left Darcy with nothing to distract him from his heartbreak and self-recriminations about his behaviour and actions towards a Miss Elizabeth Bennet. After his initial resolve to Georgiana that he would do everything in his power to win her hand, he slumped into desolation. For the first week he deluded himself that Elizabeth was not worth his attention and that she was horribly stupid for not accepting his proposal. After a time however, Darcy's disappointed feelings calmed down and allowed him some quiet time to reflect more rationally on all that occurred and he felt his errors and misjudgments keenly. Her worth grew as he contemplated her, missed her and what might have been had she accepted his proposal.

When Darcy wasn't contemplating the pleasure of a pair of very fine eyes in the face of a pretty woman, he was feeling miffed about Bingley and Croydon. Who was the man? Why had he never heard of him before? From snippets of conversations when in their company, Darcy had managed to piece together that it was a very new acquaintance formed at a Ball whilst Darcy was at Rosings Park. Croydon had also been the one to encourage Bingley's new endeavours, and if he wasn't mistaken, suggest them in the first place! Darcy really had very little liking for the man who had usurped his rightful spot. He viewed Bingley's independence as something to be suspicious about, however much he may have liked the fact that Bingley was acting more and more a man, and gentleman, than under his own tutelage.

Hence, Darcy was even more hesitant to inform Bingley of his interference regarding a Miss Jane Bennet. So far as he could detect, Bingley was no longer pining for her and why should he bring back memories of a time when Bingley was less assured and vulnerable? Indeed, it was better left as it was. Darcy would sometimes remind himself with a slight feeling of guilt that he was fairly certain that Jane Bennet might still be pining for Bingley, but if the man no longer loved her, why should he make things worse? Also, what if Miss Bennet suffered more from a lack of a suitor like Georgiana was said to be experiencing than Bingley himself? If only he could write to Elizabeth and inform her that Bingley was over the attachment, and it had been as Darcy had feared all along- another fleeting attachment that he soon overcame. She would know how to best console her sister and start the process of freeing Miss Bennet's heart to prepare it for someone else. He also often wondered how he would ever meet Elizabeth again if Bingley did not return to Netherfield. Why should Bingley return to Netherfield though when it was a source of foolish inclination and he had no regard for a certain local lady? And if he did meet Elizabeth again, what sort of havoc would that wreak upon Bingley and Jane, especially if he got his heart's desire of Elizabeth as his wife- Bingley and Miss Bennet would often be meeting each other.

It seemed quite hopeless to Darcy.

Bingley didn't really notice that he was seeing less and less of Darcy than usual. He thought it only natural since he was so busy preparing everything so he could leave Town secure in the knowledge that his new ideas would not be brushed aside and changed at a moment's notice. He simply assumed that Darcy, being Darcy, had other things more important to do. Bingley was determined that this next week would see a cessation of all that he had been working on, and then to Netherfield he would go!