Section I, Next Section
Chapter 1
Charles Bingley was deep in thoughts. In fact, he had dived in his thoughts two months ago and, so far, hadn't been able to emerge yet.
It had started with very material thoughts. Ever since he had rented Netherfield and took possession of the property, Mr. Darcy had told him that the fields were not cultivated in the right way. His advice was to change the nature of some of the crops and to take benefit of the new fashion for potatoes. His tenants would be well fed and, as Netherfield was close to London and potatoes traveled very well, he would be able to sell his production in that very ravenous market. Therefore he had given very serious thoughts to that idea (which seemed very interesting, based on the fact that it was one of his most reliable friend's) and had concluded that he should sow potatoes in some of his fields. He had made an appointment with one of London most famous tradesman in agriculture (and not following Mr. Darcy who was in contact with another one) and he was supposed to meet him the morrow of His ball, in London. In fact, he was only to meet the tradesman assistant, as Mr. Gardiner (so was called this famous tradesman) was very busy and unable to find some time in his schedule for him.
So, on the 27th of November, he had left his house very early, his head full of Jane Bennet, but nevertheless determined to prove himself (and every gentleman to whom he should ask for one's daughter's hand) that he could be a good landowner. The meeting with Mr. Corncrop itself was very promising and, if he didn't buy anything, he got out of the warehouse with a lot of information he would have to digest (and discuss with Mr. Darcy) and a new scheduled meeting in a month time to buy the seedlings and plan their delivery. Unfortunately, what came afterwards was less promising. When he entered the Hursts house in Grovesnor Street, he was very surprised to find his sisters, his brother in law and his good friend who had just arrived from Hertfordshire with all their luggage. But after having heard the information related by Caroline and Mr. Darcy, he was utterly unnerved.
Jane Bennet, his sweet Jane (as he already called her in his dreams), was not in love with him, she was not even on the verge of falling in love with him. She was only a very obedient creature at the mercy of a mother interested in his position in life, as much for her own future as for her other daughters' one. True, he had seen, since that first assembly in Meryton, that Mrs. Bennet was a mamma in want of wealthy sons in law, true, he knew that because of the entail, should something happen to Mr. Bennet, his wife and daughters would be left without income and home but, to him, that hadn't mean that the eldest daughter would pretend being very receptive to his attentions. All the private (although always with people around) conversations he had shared with Miss Bennet had been delightful. He had talked but she had, also, and not only to confirm his utterances or to flatter him. In fact, she had never flattered him. She had approved of Netherfield but it was a very nice property. And they both seemed to be of a very complying nature so the fact that they agreed on every topic was quite natural. Nevertheless, Caroline and Mr. Darcy were adamant that Jane Bennet was just pretending. Moreover, they were absolutely against a union to this family. For, if Jane Bennet was a sweet girl, this could not be said for her sisters and her parents. Just the evening before, the three youngest, the mother and the father had dreadfully acted, displaying a lack of well-breeding that could cast some not-very-well-established relatives out from the good society. And Caroline had reminded that the last sister had presented herself to their house after having walked three miles in the mud (although he had never found that it was so improper and Mr. Darcy had remained silent on that matter). If his sister and, most of all, the friend in whom he was wholly confident, agreed on those both points, they had to be right. And so, on that fateful day, his thoughts had gone from material to black.
The first week had been alcoholic. It was too much for him to endure and he had stayed in his chamber in the Grovesnor Street house in the company of his brother in law's bottles of brandy. Alarmed by the fact that his reserve was decreasing rapidly, Mr. Hurst had called Mr. Darcy who had been surprised by the extent of his friend's sorrow.
Willing to help his friend in this (and with a dim feeling of unease), he tried to cheer him up. For him, that didn't mean that he would drag Mr. Bingley to parties but he did drag him to his club, he tried to talk to him about the affairs on the Continent, about the affairs in America, about everything but Hertfordshire and the ladies living there. But Charles Bingley was, for once, a very gloomy and aloof fellow and, if the next three weeks went more soberly, they, nevertheless, went in a blur.
So, one afternoon, when a message was delivered for Mr. Bingley from Mr. Gardiner's warehouse, its recipient was, at first, quite astonished. On reading the message, the whole business came back to his mind and he acknowledged that he had missed the second appointment with his future plants provider. That woke him up. Even though he was not to return to Netherfield soon, he could not let the estate decline. His tenants were still living there, some of his money was still invested in that place, he had to do something. So he answered immediately to Mr. Corncrop, apologizing for the missed appointment and asking for a new one. A new date was settled and, two weeks later, the purchaser and the seller met at last.
During that same time, Mr. Bingley readily consented to come to a diner at Mr. Darcy's townhouse and, after the gentlemen had gathered for the port, he had discussed the different options with his friend.
"Darcy, there is a matter I'd been wanting to discuss with you a month ago but which left my mind afterwards."
As there was no doubt about the reason of that leaving, Mr. Darcy answered: "And that would be?"
"Do you remember your idea of producing potatoes at Netherfield?"
"Well, ..., yes, ..., I didn't think you had been interested."
"And you were wrong. I had even met a tradesman of that kind of plants in London. In fact, it was the reason of my coming to town after the ball." There he paused, his face coming back to the sad expression it had been wearing for the last month and that had disappeared most of the time this last week. Mr. Darcy harrumphed and Mr. Bingley shook his head.
"Well... yes, I am to meet him next week and I would like to discuss with you about the options I have. Do you mind?"
"Not at all, man! So what are they?"
I shall not sport with your interest by relaying this conversation but the end.
Mr. Bingley finished by thanking his friend: "Darcy, thank you, as always your opinion was worth knowing. I know now what to do."
"The pIeasure was mine. Your opinion is also worth knowing even though you are not confident in it. Your interest in the matter and the reasons of it are truly admirable. I think you will be a very reliable landowner. And, by the way, I am very happy to see you back, I had missed you.".
As neither Mr. Darcy nor Mr. Bingley were at ease with this last part, after a slight pause, they decided to join the ladies.
And a week after, Mr. Bingley exited Mr. Gardiner's warehouse after a good meeting business with Mr. Corncrop. The seedlings were bought, the first portion of the payment made, the delivery planned for the week after and Mr. Bingley was to come back two weeks after to pay the second and last portion.
Chapter 2
But since arriving in London, new events had created new feelings. First, there had been that call she had paid in Grosvenor Street. She had written Lizzie that Caroline was not "in spirits" but in fact, Miss Bingley had been quite cold. And, on further thinking, several things had made her perplex. For instance, Miss Bingley had received none of the two letters she had sent. Or, she and Mrs. Hurst had seemed anxious at every noise in the house and had almost seemed glad when she had stood to depart. Else, they had told her that they were going out and that was the reason of such a short visit but they had not proposed her to come and join them. She had a good, if too kind, understanding and, without her closest sister to comment on the odd side of those events, she had done it by herself. And she had concluded that it looked strangely as if, as so good a friend as she, Jane Bennet, had been in Hertfordshire, she was not good enough for London. But she couldn't believe that such ladies would behave in such a way and of course, they had a lot of friends in London. It was always tricky to introduce a friend to others, a shopping party might not have been the best occasion. Therefore her letter to Lizzie had been hopeful of a soon new meeting with Caroline and had not expressed the suspicions raised.
But two weeks later, she had still been waiting for this call and had, much to her regret, not had any news from the brother either. The conclusion she had once drawn was now constantly in her mind. Was she really not a lady enough to call on and to be seen with for Caroline Bingley? She was still deeply unhappy and more resigned than ever but she was also becoming less indulgent by the day. And this was another new and unwelcome feeling to her. Such was her mind when the "theater incident" happened. Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner, always keen on diverting one of their two favorite nieces, and all the more eager to have her laugh because of her visibly unhappy state, had taken her to the theater. The comedy they were to see was highly praised in all London and she really had enjoyed the first part. They had been well located in a box on one side of the scene. And, as everybody does during the interval, she had scanned the audience. Afterwards, she had wondered why, but whatever may have been the reasons, she had scanned nonetheless. And she had soon found out that Miss Bingley was in the audience with a large party that didn't include her siblings. Jane had not searched for Caroline's look but it had happened that their eyes had met. Although less indulgent, she remained sure of everyone's goodness and of her once-very-good-friend's civility. She had therefore been wholly unprepared for the horrified expression she had watched appearing on Caroline's face and for her following total ignorance of her. Fortunately, the second part of the play had begun soon after and Jane had been able to hide her sudden change of mood to her Aunt and Uncle. She had even been able to pretend laughing when everyone around was but the thoughts occupying her had not been merry ones. At first, and because she was herself, she had been sorry, sorry to have come, sorry to have scanned the crowd, sorry to have met Miss Bingley's eyes. She had thought how uncomfortable Caroline must have felt and had really been sorry for that too. Then she had thought of her own discomfort, of her spoiled evening, of the two previous weeks and she had started to feel less sorry for Caroline and more sorry for herself. And once they had come back to Gracechurch Street, she hadn't been sorry any longer, she had been bubbling inside with things that she could have done or said to make Miss Bingley acknowledge her at least, she had been shaking, her cheeks glowing of anger. The good point had been that her Aunt had commented on her lively complexion and had concluded that she seemed to get better every day. But the bad point had been that Jane Bennet was feeling anger. Anger was a sin wholly unknown to her and to feel it so accurately rendered her ashamed of herself. And to conclude that long list of unwelcome and new sins, she added lie. For wasn't it a lie not to write about that "incident" to Lizzie? It may not have been really a lie, but an omission was almost as bad if not used for another's sake (her mother for instance, when it was better for her health). That was not the case there, she had not told Lizzie because of the shame she felt, not to prevent her sister from a fit of nerves!
When, two weeks after, at last, she had seen Caroline exiting from a carriage in front of her Aunt's house, joy for seeing her and shame for having been so unjust had assailed her. Miss Bingley had probably been very busy, maybe even ill, so ill that she could not even write to inform her. She had probably not seen her in the theater, her look directed through her towards someone behind her. Maybe, herself, Jane, had mistaken someone else for her. She had felt so relieved not to have told a word to anyone. And then she had been in the same room as Caroline. And all her worst suspicions had come back and proved right by the caller's behavior and the shortness of her stay. As she had written afterwards to her sister: "... it was very evident that she had no pleasure in it; she made a slight, formal, apology for not calling before, said not a word of wishing to see me again, and was in every respect so altered a creature, that when she went away I was perfectly resolved to continue the acquaintance no longer.". She had felt the deception so strongly that, in the same letter, she had even been able to openly blame someone (Miss Bingley, for the matter), though softening it with sisterly fear for her brother's happiness. During that call, she had also understood that her sister's point of view on the so-called attachment between Miss Darcy and Mr. Bingley was probably right and that, on that topic also, Miss Bingley had been deceiving her. All things considered, she had been grateful for that meeting. She was no longer blinded by some undeserved loyalty and felt relieved that the horrible feelings she had come to nurture towards this particular family were not undeserved. For now that they were acknowledged, she could not but include Mr. Bingley in her disappointment and anger. He had been deceiving her also, he had also ignored her during her stay in town (for Miss Bingley had said herself that he had known of Jane's being in London) and he had been so attentive back in Hertfordshire.
So, after nearly a month of caring for her heart by healing her head of misconceptions, Jane could take benefit of being surrounded by a loving, peaceful and harmonious household. The regular letters she got from her sister were instructive and funny, the ones she received from the others, less frequent but presenting different points of view, made her smile also and she was now able to enjoy her stay in London. True to their word, Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner had taken her to a concert and another play and she had neither scanned the audience nor been accosted by any acquaintance. Following Lizzie's unsaid but probable advice, she also endeavored to get out as much as the weather permitted, which didn't mean very often, since the winter was very cold and rainy. And true to her own nature, she always tried to be of use to her Aunt and Uncle, whether inside or outside. Of course, she took care of her young cousins and was now acquainted with the park where they were used to going play and an expert in all the games they were used to playing. She also regularly ran some errands for her Aunt and Mrs. Gardiner's milliner or dress-maker were always glad to see her. From time to time, and as Mr. Gardiner's warehouse was not far from Gracechurch Street, she would also bring something her Uncle would have forgotten. Her days, at least, were busy and if she tired herself enough, she could also drift to sleep easily. Her complexion was better and her mood lighter but she was still not her old self and hoped that time would do its job. Nevertheless, she knew that a part of her had been changed forever and that she had lost some of her innocence. She still couldn't think of the Bingleys without anger flooding her heart and she would have said that she no longer cared for the head of that family.
Chapter 3
"And you see Caroline, in two months time, once the weather has turned to sun and rain and the earth is warm again, our tenants shall sow the seeds in the field which is just half a mile south from the house. With any luck, if the foliage of the trees are not too dense, we might even be able to see it from the main drawing-room!"
"Really, Charles?" sighed Caroline, looking doubtfully at her sister.
"Yes, and then, about 2 weeks after, once the stem is out, they will surround it with some earth.", he went on enthusiastically, miming the surrounding of the precious plants.
"How very interesting!" answered Louisa while her husband was filling his mouth clearly beyond its capacity.
"Anyway, today is a big day, I shall lay down the last part of the payment and those "royal kidneys" will be mine!" At this point he was almost ecstatic. "I must hurry if I'm not to be late for my appointment. I shall see Darcy afterwards, don't expect me too soon."
This woke up Caroline. "Dear Mr. Darcy! I've longed to see him. And dear Georgiana! You should invite him to come for diner with his sister soon! Shouldn't he Louisa?"
But Louisa didn't have to answer, their brother having already run to his appointment.
"Really, what a fuss for potatoes!" was her reaction.
"True... but since he found that new passion, he seems to have almost forgotten Jane Bennet. It is far less dangerous, is it not?"
"It is, my dear, it is. And he has appeared more cheerful for a month."
"Indeed. And as he has reappeared for his friends, we already see much more of the Darcys."
"True Caroline, true..." It was Louisa's turn to sigh now.
On that sunny but frigid morning, Mr. Gardiner had been late and had run from home, forgetting his lunch basket. Mrs. Gardiner could have asked a servant to bring it to the warehouse but she thought better of it and asked Jane instead. Jane was glad to go out and take benefit of those first rays of sun since one week and readily agreed. When she arrived, her uncle was in a meeting with his assistant and she waited, idly chatting with his secretary. Soon she was welcomed in his office where she saluted Mr. Corncrop and asked about his children. Having some papers to gather before his next appointment, the assistant excused himself quickly, leaving the niece kindly scolding her uncle.
"Dear Uncle, you actually planned to skip lunch? Mrs. Gardiner would never have allowed that!"
Smiling, Mr. Gardiner answered: "No my dear. I had thought you looked a trifle pale this morning and that an outing would do you good. So I left it on purpose!"
"Sir, I don't believe you. Had not my aunt reminded you to put your hat on, you would have left bare-headed. That would have been because your hair were a trifle pale also?"
Mr. Gardiner was now laughing. "Lizzie, I recognized you, you can quit your mask!"
Jane's attitude changed and she asked seriously: "Really, Uncle, you think so?"
She needn't be more precise. Mr. Gardiner had understood his niece's question. So he stopped joking also and answered:
"Yes Jane, you've changed. Of course, you're still looking on the world with far kinder eyes than your sister. But you'd never have answered like that 3 months ago. We've always loved you because of your sweetness of character but your aunt and I have also always been afraid for you, because of it. You now appear to us better armed to confront the world. We are glad to see where you stand now even though we deeply regret what happened."
There was a pause before Jane concluded, her voice constrained: "It's by no means your fault and I start to think that it wasn't mine either. But I'd rather not speak about it." After another pause, her voice steadier, she went on. "I think I have taken enough of your time, I shall leave and go back to Gracechurch Street." And, after he had opened his office's door, she said, looking at him and getting out: "I bid you a good day, Uncle". And then she turned her head towards the corridor and found herself staring into the disbelieving eyes of an obviously shocked Charles Bingley.
Indeed, on running up the stairs to the offices area, he had been, once again, deep in thoughts. There was still a point he had to clear with Mr. Corncrop regarding the exact size of the stems when they were to be surrounded. He didn't even think that it was a question that concerned more his steward than himself, being wholly dedicated to his new passion. So, he barely paid attention to his surroundings. But the noise of a door being opened disturbed his concentration and he stopped in his track and shot his head up when he heard that voice. His thoughts rushed. "Good God, I'd have sworn tis hers. But no, tis not possible. She's in Meryton. What could she be doing in London? What could she be doing in a warehouse in Cheapside? Come on Man, you've got to get over her." and he resumed his climbing. Still shaken, he entered the corridor and found himself facing the most beautiful creature he had ever beheld, the one he would have never thought seeing there, the one because of whom he had been despaired and still was deeply unhappy.
Jane was hardly less shocked. Every time she had been to a public place, she had prepared herself for fear of seeing, or even worse, meeting him. But here, in her uncle's warehouse, every rampart was down and she had been wholly unprepared for that happening. She cast her eyes down, hopeful that on raising them he would have disappeared. But no, it was not meant to be, he was not some kind of ghost drawn here by her thoughts some minutes ago. Charles Bingley was in front of her.
Edward Gardiner was wondering on the scene he was witnessing. What was happening? Why were those two frozen, staring at each other? Had Time stopped its course? Not being acquainted with the gentleman, he didn't dare interfere.
Eventually, Jane recovered enough to speak and to curtsy slightly. "Mr. Bingley."
"Mmmm Mmmm Miss Bennet!" and, as woken up from a trance, he bowed rigidly.
Jane went on. "I didn't know you would be here or I..." "or I what? Or I would not have come? Surely, but I cannot be that uncivil."
But Mr. Bingley didn't seem to find odd that she would not finish her sentence. His thoughts were still in turmoil. "I... I have an appointment with Mr. Corncrop, I'm buying seeds for Netherfield. Potatoe seeds. But... I cannot believe you're here, in front of me."
Jane held on to this last part. At least, it was a practical one she could answer easily. "Mr. Corncrop is Mr. Gardiner's assistant. Mr. Gardiner is my uncle. I've been staying with him and his family for a month now. As for meeting at last, I guess that it was bound to happen. Your sister said you were much engaged but you and I being in London..." Her saying you and I had been too painful and she couldn't go on with her answer.
But, if, that morning, she wasn't meant to finish a sentence, he wasn't meant to seem to care either. The reference to his sister made him confused. "My sister? Caroline? You met Caroline in London?"
Had Jane's thoughts been steadier, had her heart not been broken, had she been the old Jane, had she not been so angry and so disappointed, she would have believed him, she would have heard he was sincere, but she didn't. And being new in dealing with Good and Bad (at least the Worse she could feel), she couldn't get the control over her feelings and Anger spoke instead of Breeding.
"Indeed I did, Sir. And you're well aware of it, as Miss Bingley told me. I'm very disappointed to see you hiding behind your sister. She was barely civil when she called on me at my aunt's but at least, she called. You, sir, didn't even take the trouble of it.
"But, on second thoughts, it didn't surprise me. The way you fled from Netherfield in November was a good indication of your ignoring the feelings of others. We had all been happy of having you in the neighborhood, we all thought that you were not like those proud Londoners who think themselves above the country people, but we were wrong. And you deceived us." Her chin was high, her cheeks flushed with anger.
Mr. Bingley had, at first, been utterly surprised by the narrative of his sister's actions. And, although anger towards his sister was bubbling inside of him, he was ready to apologize and to explain Jane he was wholly unaware of her presence in London. But the second part of her answer changed the recipient of his fury. And the more Jane was speaking, the more furious he felt. He had been deceived too, while in Hertfordshire. She had encouraged his attention without returning his affection. He had been honest and trustful with her and she was now saying those horrible things to him. All his unhappiness surfaced and expressed itself fiercely:
"I deceived you? I deceived you?" Jane gasped, he went on.
"From the very beginning of our acquaintance, I had been impressed by your beauty. Soon after, your sweetness and your manners had made you a delightful neighbor. Those qualities only improved with each meeting and, very quickly, I found myself longing for your presence and relishing the moments we spent together." Jane was bewildered. His message was sweet but his tone bitter, and so was the last part of his speech.
"I made myself quite clear regarding my affections for you and you seemed to return them. But it was only a game for you! It was only a way to secure a wealthy husband and a comfortable future. I am too gullible and you used it. Once I had been informed of your deception, I had no choice but not return to Netherfield. I had been laughed at enough. So I ask you, who was the one deceived?"
By now, the shock had been too much for Jane. Tears running on her cheeks, she couldn't bare any longer so unjust accusations. And, while she was running down the corridor and the stairs, the sound of her sobs was clearly heard by the two men.
Chapter 4
"Sir, I know we've not been formerly introduced but I have to react to your uncivil and unjust speech towards my niece. I'm too old to send you my witnesses but your behavior was unacceptable. Jane is the best of the young ladies I know. She always sees the best in everything and everyone and she's the most forgiving person of my acquaintance. Your reproach was wholly undeserved. You should be ashamed of yourself."
On hearing this, Mr. Bingley's lowering temper rose anew and he resumed in the same bitter voice.
"Mr. Gardiner, I presume?"
Edward Gardiner only nodded, as obvious as it was that Charles Bingley hadn't finished his answer.
"Mr. Gardiner, may I point you that you were not in Hertfordshire last autumn? May I suggest that you may have been told some falsehood? Everything I've just told exactly happened. I really thought I had found an angel, the companion I had longed for. And then..."
His voice crackled, the wetness in his eyes very obvious, he stopped abruptly.
The older man understood and thought it wisest to lead the younger in his office and to make him sit. He closed the door and sat by his side.
Since his heart had broken, Mr. Bingley hadn't been able to express his feelings. His sisters and Mr. Darcy hadn't been willing to be his confident and he hadn't felt like talking to them anyway. And he didn't have anyone closer to him than those three. His Jane would have been the one towards whom he would have turned. But of course, this had been a wild dream. So, when he found himself in that cosy room, in front of that visibly understanding man, he broke down.
"I loved her, you know. I think I love her still. She broke my heart." His speech was hacked as he was, manly, repressing his sobs.
"How?"
"She toyed with me, she pretended to return my affection, she was so sweet, so caring."
"But what happened to make you realize she had been toying and pretending?" Mr. Gardiner didn't think Jane had done any of this things but he was also more and more convinced that there had been a misunderstanding and he wanted to understand which one.
"Nothing happened. The ball was a dream, she was so beautiful. I was determined to propose but I had that meeting with M. Corncrop and I wanted to buy something worthy of her. But then, in London, my sisters and my friend came to tell me that she was not what I thought she was, which could be summarized by in love with me."
"And you did trust them?"
Mr. Bingley was truly amazed. "Of course I did! Caroline is more used to social manners than I am and Mr. Darcy is my friend and I totally rely on his judgment."
"But did your sister seem at ease in the social gathering of Hertfordshire? Did your friend behave normally at that time?"
The younger gentleman was intrigued by the way the older was taking him. Nobody, since Cambridge, had ever asked him so many questions and he didn't remember this time as a very comfortable one. But there, it was not so uncomfortable. Agreeable was not the word either, but he was rather willing to follow his elder nevertheless.
"Without offence, Caroline found the company tedious and below her. As for Darcy, he was sterner than usual and seemed more and more withdrawn into himself. Each time Jane was around, he seemed to avoid her or her family." Mr. Bingley paused, thinking. "Tis' not true. If I remember well, he once danced with Miss Elizabeth at the ball... And he had told me at the Assembly that she was not handsome enough to tempt him... How odd!"
"And did you have any reason to believe that my niece could be how she was, afterwards, described to you?"
"No, never, she had seemed to me the most honest and trustful creature in the world. And everybody in Meryton seemed to think likewise." His speech was slower and slower.
Mr. Gardiner watched the doubts settling on his face. He waited for him to come to the conclusion by himself. Mr. Bingley opened his mouth several times before actually producing a sound, as if the thoughts he was about to express were too unbelievable to be true.
Eventually, he spoke: "Could it be possible that their judgment had been clouded by pride or prejudice? Could it be possible that they misunderstood Ja... Miss Bennet's feelings? Could it be possible that I was right and they were wrong?" And then the most painful revelation downed on him: "Could it be possible that I unjustly accused Jane?" His face now mirrored his horror and he didn't bother amending his familiarity.
Very softly, a hand on his young companion's shoulder, Edward Gardiner answered: "I'm afraid you did, Sir."
A lengthy silence followed this answer. Charles Bingley had hidden his face in his hands and, if no sound could be heard, his shoulders were shaking. Mr. Gardiner stood up, went to open a little cupboard, poured one glass of Whiskey and proposed it to his shocked companion. Eventually, the latter wiped his cheeks and his eyes with his handkerchief, took the glass and drained it. The older man hesitated between refilling it and thought better of it. When he had recovered enough, Mr. Bingley resumed the conversation.
"How do you know, sir?"
Mr. Gardiner didn't know what to do. What was the best for Jane? He was now firmly convinced that the gentleman in front of him had been led to believe the horrible things he had said to Jane, he was also convinced that he wasn't aware of Jane's being in town, he was, at last, convinced that his heart was still Jane's and that there remained hope for those two. But what role was he to play? He was tempted to let them solve their misunderstandings by themselves but the least that could be said was that their last confrontation hadn't been successful and that, considering Jane's mindset, it could not be presumed that the next one would be smoother. So he made up his mind and decided to, at least, describe Jane's sorrow since December and end the revealing of Miss Bingley's behavior in London.
Mr. Bingley was now shifting in his seat, waiting for Mr. Gardiner's answer. "Well, sir?"
"Well? Well, Mrs. Gardiner and I arrived in Meryton a couple of weeks after your leaving and you must be aware that the only talk of the town was the way you deserted Jane after having raised so much hope. Of course, some were more talkative than others..." He smirked thinking about his sister. "But the only one who was silent about it was Jane herself. She was even quieter than usual, as sweet as ever but her smiles were scarce and the light in her eyes had disappeared. We soon knew everything although she never spoke to us about it. You must be aware, Sir, that our two eldest nieces are as daughters to us. They've always spent some time with us in London and Mrs. Gardiner, especially, is a favorite of them. They welcomed her very warmly in the family and she's still very grateful for that. But, their inner qualities would have been enough to recommend them to her, anyway. And I think they have found in her a source of feminine wisdom that might not have always been present in their home. You see, as much as I love my sister, I'm afraid she's not the kind of example one should follow. One should not blame her entirely for that, though. She didn't benefit from a governess and was raised by a very silly woman who only praised beauty and money. And, as my father wasn't interested in his daughters, she was left to turn how she is now. Mr. Bennet, whom I like thoroughly, has also his share of the blame as he never tried to change her behavior, although, as her husband, she would have listened to him... But, I'm digressing.
"Where was I? ... Our knowledge didn't only come from gossip but also from Elizabeth who, without revealing her sister's secrets, told us about your party and the way you had interacted with the neighborhood. And although Elizabeth tried to protect her sister, the company in Hertfordshire, kindly condoling with Jane's situation, only reinforced her sorrow by preventing her of burying your memory. Elizabeth, therefore, suggested that Jane came back with us in London. Everyone agreed with the scheme and we settled back in London a week after Christmas."
Mr. Bingley's face reflected his own sorrow at learning what sufferings had been caused by his disappearance. But something was missing. Jane had told him that Caroline had called on her. Why would she have seen his sister and not himself? Why hadn't Caroline told him about this meeting? Obviously, Jane hadn't believe him when he had said that he didn't knew her to be in London and, now that he knew that she had been honest, he had to know the truth on that matter too. Although he feared the older gentleman wouldn't answer him, he asked nonetheless.
"And how did it happen that Miss Bennet met my sister and I was not aware of it? 'Cause you have to believe me, I didn't have the slightest notion of her being in Town. And if Caroline was indeed aware of it..."
"I believe you, Sir. As for the meeting, I'm afraid I don't know everything. I wasn't a witness, only someone to whom the tale was said afterwards, and not even by Jane herself."
Mr. Bingley was disappointed, he needed as much information as possible 'cause he had to affront his sister now. And to face her was never an easy task. He had to be prepared. "I understand, but it is extremely important for me. I beg you, Sir. I swear I will only consider your information as a side of the story."
"You must understand the reasons of my reluctance. I wouldn't like to accuse Miss Bingley of anything. The only ones who could provide you with the truth are your sister and my niece."
"I know, I know..." Mr. Bingley felt his temper rise once again but, knowing that this would lead him nowhere, he got hold on it and went on: "but Miss Bennet doesn't want to speak to me any longer and I'm afraid Caroline wouldn't tell the entire truth if I were to ask her without previous knowledge." He couldn't recall a time when he had had to be as convincing. "Please, Sir."
"I will tell you what my wife has told me of what she's been told. You will conclude what you will with it.
"First, after you left, Jane received a letter from your sister stating that they would follow you to London and that you would remain there. It also said that she was hoping that you would soon be engaged to be married to Mr. Darcy's sister."
Charles Bingley was amazed. "Miss Darcy? She's only sixteen! And I have never shown the least affection for her. Why would Caroline say such a thing?"
"It is not my place to tell. I will only try to deal with facts. Shall I go on?"
"Yes, please!"
"The letter also asked Jane to be a trustful correspondent, so, she felt at ease to inform her that she would be in London in a short while. But, when, a day or two after arriving, she called on your sisters in Grosvenor Square, they were very surprised to see her, as it seems that the letter had got lost." There was a pause in his speech, as much because it was obvious that this news was a shock to his young companion, as because he recalled that his wife had told him about two letters.
"Miss Bennet, in Grosvenor Square, a month ago, and I was not told about it..."
"If I recall properly, she sent two letters and both got lost."
"Two letters!"
"I was just told that the meeting went well but for the fact that you sister was... 'out of spirit', I think that were her very words, and that it was a short call, your sisters having planned to have an outing this very morning.
"What went less well was the time it took your sister to call back. Something like three or four weeks went by before Miss Bingley went to Gracechurch Street. And Mrs. Gardiner, who was present during your sister's call, was utterly amazed by her behavior. She was barely civil, not talkative at all and fled after the shortest call my wife had been paid. Afterwards, we never got any news from your sister and I know that Jane gave up her 'corresponding' with her."
At the end of Mr. Gardiner's speech, Mr. Bingley remained silent and seemed to let the words sink into his mind. After a while, the older man resumed the conversation.
"Well, Sir. I have nothing else to say. I think you have to ask your sister's point of view and draw your own conclusions. And, if I recall well, my assistant must be still waiting for you!"
"Yes... yes, Mr. Corncrop. Would you mind informing me that a business of the most urgent nature prevents me from attending our meeting. I shall make a new appointment soon. Do you mind, Sir?"
"Not at all. I will tell him."
"Thank you, Sir. I shall leave you now." He stood up and added:
"Oh... about your niece... what shall you tell her?"
"Would you like me to say something in particular?"
"Oh no! I wouldn't know what to say. I feel so dreadful about the harsh words I said to her. Had I know... But I'm afraid it is too late, now, anyway..." he started towards the door, his head downcast. As Mr. Gardiner was to open the door, he raised his hand and said:
"I would just like to have a chance to apologize. Sir, is it too much to ask if I dare giving you a letter for her?"
Mr. Gardiner had long been resolved in giving the young gentleman a hand in making his niece happy, so he replied, smiling:
"No, Sir, 'tis not too much to ask although propriety would forbid it."
Mr. Bingley bowed, a small smile returning on his features. "I thank you, Sir. Good bye, Sir."
Mr. Gardiner bowed in return. "Good day to you, sir."
And as Mr. Bingley was leaving, he thought to himself. "It didn't begin pleasantly to you and I'm afraid it will go on as it started. But I think some future days might happen to be more pleasant than you expected them!"
Chapter 5
Jane didn't really remember how she had got home. Fortunately, she was fairly familiar with the neighborhood by then and hadn't got lost. On entering the house, she was relieved on being informed that her aunt had taken the children outside for them to take also benefit of the sun. Like that, she had been able to retire to her room without anyone noticing her current mood. She had, of course, forgotten about the servants who liked her a lot and were, soon, all worried about her.
Because she still hadn't recovered from the shock of first, meeting, at last, Mr. Bingley and then quarreling with him as she had. She couldn't understand neither how she had been able to shout at him some very disagreeable things, nor how he had been able to answer her such unjust reproaches, in that cold and despising tone. The words kept turning in her head, her words "... And you deceived us...", his words "... But it was only a game for you! It was only a way to secure a wealthy husband and a comfortable future..." and she felt dizzy of this horrible Merry-Go-Round that couldn't be stopped. Her tears, which had dried during her trip back home, had started to pour once again and, face against her pillow, lying across her bed, she tried to silence her sobs so that nobody would be upset for her.
After a while, she stopped crying and she felt empty. She felt she couldn't cry anymore, she felt she couldn't think properly anymore and, sitting up on her bed, watching some feeble rays of sun going through the window, she felt alone. " O Lizzie, Lizzie, only you could help me! Dear, dear Lizzie, with your caring ways, you would have smoothed my sorrow, with you wit, you would have shown me the humor of our argument, and with your sense, you would have given me some good pieces of advice." But Lizzie was half-a-day far, barely mourning Mr. Wickham's attentions that had now turned towards Miss King and her ten thousands and there was no way to have her in London. Thinking about her sister's misfortunes made her aware that she had just succumbed to a very selfish and theatrical fit of nerves and that she really didn't want to make a habit of it. Therefore, she resolved on acting instead of grizzling and thought that, if she wanted Lizzie's help, she ought to ask for it, which meant writing her the details of the morning events.
My dear Lizzie,
Please, don't be alarmed on receiving a letter from me so soon after the last one, nothing really serious happened, I just find myself in dire need of your caring but sharp understanding. It is all related to an event that happened this morning while I was in Uncle Gardiner's warehouse, delivering him his forgotten lunch.
Re-living their fortuitous encounter was thoroughly painful to Jane and she felt the tears coming back. She was not dried, after all! She regained her self-control and resumed her writing.
It happened that Mr. Bingley... her penning was quivered on that last word ... had an appointment at the same time with the good Mr. Corncrop and that we found ourselves facing each other in the corridor (I mean, not with Mr. Corncrop, but with ... the other gentleman). Imagine my shock on meeting with him at last, in our Uncle's office. He seemed to be even more shocked than I was. I can't imagine why, 'cause he knew I was in town and that such a meeting could happen. You know my feelings for him, Lizzie. After what I've been through this past month, I thought I was over him and anything he could say couldn't hurt me but I was wrong. 'Cause when he lied on purpose to me, stating that he didn't know I had met his sisters since my coming in London, it wounded me. And when he told me that I had played a game with him, during last autumn, that I had pretended to be in love to catch a wealthy husband, he tore my heart and my soul apart. How could he? By then, she had lost the fight with her tears and was obliged to stop her writing or her sister would notice the stains on the paper.
I don't know what to do, I feel so lost! Should I ask my Aunt and Uncle to send me back to Longbourn? But what about Mama's feelings? She was so hopeful that my trip would have soothed my pain! I'm afraid after today's encounter, I feel slightly upset. What if she were aware of it? And I wouldn't want to upset my Aunt and Uncle. They have been so good with me. I wouldn't want to appear ungrateful.
Dear, dear Lizzie, what shall I do?
Your truly lost sister,
Jane.
Jane felt a little relieved on folding her letter, as if she had given herself time to find an action plan.
One floor bellow, Mrs. Gardiner and the children had come back and, while the children were being scrubbed from the remaining of the splashes they had got while running in the damp alleys of the park, she was discreetly informed by her housekeeper that a very upset Miss Bennet had returned from her outing to the warehouse and that she had kept to her room ever since. She inquired further to learn that the lady hadn't seemed to have suffered from any injury or robbery but that she obviously had been crying.
This news upset wildly Mrs. Gardiner. While she was about to climb the stairs to inquire of Jane, her husband entered the house.
"Why, Edward, what are you doing here?" she asked, startled by this untimely arrival. "Didn't Jane bring you your lunch? I have been told that she came back very upset from her outing and was about to go to see her."
"I can understand why she was upset."
"Why, what happened? Why didn't you escort her home if you knew she was not well?"
"Dearest, please, calm yourself. I witnessed everything and I can assure you that some very good could come out of it." Mr. Gardiner was trying to be reassuring but, obviously, it didn't help his wife.
"But what did you witness? Will you please tell me?" She was almost shouting at him by then.
One quarrel a day being quite enough, he led her to the drawing-room, closed the door and tried to be as synthetic as possible.
"She encountered her Mr. Bingley at the warehouse and they quarreled harshly."
"Her Mr. Bingley? But what was he doing over there? And why did they quarrel? Jane is much too reserved and well-bred to quarrel with anyone, least of all with him and in public."
"You would have been as amazed as I was. First, Mr. Bingley is one of my new customers. I wasn't aware of it since Corncrop is his contact and he wasn't aware that Jane was my niece. Fate or destiny, choose which you like, made them fall face to face in the corridor.
"At first the discussion was inexistent, both being too shocked to say anything. Then it was civil but not fluent. And then, Mr. Bingley expressed his astonishment at knowing that Jane had seen his sisters. And to the utter amazement of all, including herself probably, Jane started to accuse him of being a coward and a deceiver. Although I thought I couldn't be surprised any longer, I must say that the gentleman's answer was beyond predictability. In almost the same sentence, he stated that he had fallen in love with her for all her qualities we know, that he had been very close to propose and that she had only toyed with him, chasing a wealthy husband for the sake of herself and her family."
Mrs. Gardiner was speechless, her eyes wide. She had sat down during this amazing tale.
"That's when she ran out from the warehouse and I must say I was too shocked to even think about following her. That's why I came back as soon as I could. I am happy to learn that she did come back home safely."
She recovered her power of speech. "It's not true, is it?"
He sat near her, took her hands in his and answered. "Yes, Madeline, it is. He told her that she had pretended to return his affections. I still cannot understand how he could have believed that."
"Still?"
"Yes, I said I came back as soon as I could 'cause I couldn't let him get away without expressing my deep discontentment with his attitude. And, as this day was meant to be one of the most astounding of my life, the gentleman broke down in front of me. He told me his side of the story. I must say it was quite an interesting one. Before telling it to you, you must know that Bingley and Jane are meant for each other. They are both of a very good nature, looking on the world with kind eyes but not very self-confident. They're main difference is that she is much more reserved than he is. And the quiet ways she might have expressed her feelings for him last autumn were answered by the open signs we have been described by everyone at Christmas."
"So he is trustworhty"
"I think so. And that's why I believed him when he told me that, before today, he wasn't aware of her being in London."
"But she has written and seen his sister twice!"
"I know, but he didn't."
"And now, he does?"
"Yes... I didn't know quite right to do. But I couldn't let him think ill of Jane. She is the sweetest creature in the world, apart from you, Dearest, and if she has a chance of happiness with this man, I couldn't not help her a little."
She smiled. "I don't think sweetness is my best quality but I'm good for the rest of it."
He went on. "The point is that Miss Bingley and his friend, Mr. Darcy, convinced him that marrying our Jane would be a mistake and that, afterwards, his sister concealed him her encounters with Jane."
"Why?"
"That, I cannot answer and neither could Mr. Bingley but I think he will soon know. He was very angry with his sister when he left and I think he hasn't stop arguing for today!"
"Angry?"
"Yes, angry. 'Cause he still loves Jane. And I think that was the main reason for his being so bitter in his accusations."
"What is he going to do?"
"Apart from finding the truth about his sister's behavior? I don't know... he was very upset when he understood that he had unjustly accused Jane. He asked me a favor I didn't deny him."
"And that would be?"
"He begged me to authorize him to send a letter of excuses to her."
"Do you have it?" she asked eagerly.
"No. I don't think he was composed enough to write anything consistent. And, moreover, he still has to find out the whole truth."
There was a silence after that last sentence. Eventually, Mrs. Gardiner summed up the situation. "So he loves her, there is a chance that she still loves him too and he is resolved in getting his chance once again?
"We should live some interesting days, soon, shouldn't we?"
"I'm sure we will." Was his final comment before he stood up and went to the door.
"Wait Edward! What are we to do with Jane? Do you want to tell her what he told you?"
He went back to sit by her.
"Bingley didn't ask me to do such a thing. It might interfere with his letter."
"But we cannot let Jane despair if there is no reason!" She was adamant to relieve her niece's sufferings.
"She was so furious, I'm not sure she's ready to hear his good qualities!"
"Fury, anger, those are so unnatural in Jane's character. How do you think she lives with them?"
"My dear, ever since you've met her and her sister, you have been much closer to them that I ever could. I think you can answer that better than I."
Mrs. Gardiner thought a while and answered: "She must feel lost. She has been very secretive regarding the whole Bingley business. The only one with whom she has been able to open up a little was Lizzie. I'm not sure she would talk with me on that matter."
The idea underlying in her answer was not lost for her husband.
"Why don't we invite Lizzie? She is supposed to go to Kent in a couple of months or so. She could stop for a while in London on her way there!"
"That seems a good idea. But I'd rather talk to Jane before, if you don't mind."
"Of course, Dearest. I shall prepare an express to Bennet and you might add a word or two for Lizzie. And if you're convinced 'tis the good course of action, I will send it after dinner."
Before parting, she towards Jane's door and he towards his office, he kissed her tenderly. Somewhat surprised by this unusual display of affection outside their bedchamber, she raised an eyebrow. He whispered in his ear his answer: "Because I love you and this argument reminded me how lucky I am that you love me too."
She whispered playfully: "Shall we discuss on that topic tonight?"
He smiled and they quitted the room.
Jane didn't feel like facing her family for dinner and had asked to have it brought to her room. Nevertheless, she was surprised on hearing the light knock on her door for it was still to early for dinner. She answered positively anyway and understood her error on seeing her aunt entering.
Mrs. Gardiner went to sit by her and, with a concerned look, asked her:
"How are you Jane? I hear you've asked to have your dinner in your room and you don't look very well. What happened?"
"I'd rather not talk about it. Let's just say I've finally met Mr. Bingley and it has not been agreeable at all. But do not worry. I'm sure it will pass with some rest." Jane's composure was better than her aunt had expected. She had obviously been crying for some time but she seemed to be resolved to present a more steadfast face to the world. It was the knowledge that she was able to break down any moment that made her desirous to remain in her bedchamber.
Mrs. Gardiner felt slightly relieved and agreed to her wish. "If you say so, my Dear. I will let you."
"Thank you my Aunt. And please, do not worry over me, I don't deserve it."
Taking Jane's hand, she answered. "On the contrary, no one deserves it more than you do. Is there really nothing I can do?"
"Well... yes... Would you mind posting that letter for me, please, Aunt?"
"Of course, Jane... Until tomorrow, then..."
"Until tomorrow Aunt."
On exiting the room, Mrs. Gardiner read the name of the correspondent to whom Jane was sending a letter. And soon after, two letters were on their way to Longbourn, Hertfordshire.
Chapter 6
He went automatically to the place where he and Darcy were used to gather and, of course, the latter was there, reading a newspaper. He ordered his brandy and, although he was unsure on what he was willing to tell his friend regarding the morning events, he sat down and bid him good day.
"Hello, Bingley. What are you doing here? I thought I wouldn't see you until much later. Didn't you have an appointment with your plant reseller?" Darcy answered, folding his newspaper. Then he looked at his friend and asked, slightly upset.
"Are you all right, Charles? You look dreadful, as if you had seen a ghost!" On saying those words, a very annoying reason of that look popped up in his mind. He tried to put it aside and waited for his companion's answer. It was some time before it came.
"A ghost! It was worse than a ghost. A ghost doesn't shout at you, a ghost doesn't cry when you reply to it, a ghost doesn't have an uncle who tell you the horrible truth you had been hidden from."
Darcy couldn't make sense of that speech. His doubtful feature motioned Bingley to go on and be more explicit.
"I've met Miss Bennet today, here, in London." And then, he related the whole argument, including her narrative of the meetings with his sister, of his 'flight' from Netherfield, of her feeling of deception; including his answer regarding his feelings for her while over there and his understanding of her deception. "By then, she was crying loudly and she fled from the warehouse."
Darcy, although feeling slightly ill-at-ease regarding the concealment of Miss Bennet's stay in London, was quite proud of his friend. It's the first time Bingley has shown he could resist an artful lady, my lessons have been well understood, indeed! But what was she doing in a warehouse? I thought she was above her siblings, well except her, but it would happen that the truth was worse than I thought!
"As you can well imagined, I was still deep in shock and when her uncle started to scold me for my 'undeserved reproach'..."
"Hold on, man! Her uncle?"
"Yes, her uncle! Mr. Gardiner! The tradesman from whom I'm buying my plants works for her uncle. Remember, her uncle... in trade... living in Cheapside..."
A light of understanding and amazement appeared in Darcy's eyes.
"That man witnessed the whole confrontation! And afterwards he even went as far as saying to me that only his age prevented him from sending his witnesses to me!"
Darcy's astonishment knew then no limit.
"Those people have no decency! But what did he tell you? How did you answer him? I hope you made him apologize!"
"Apologize? Apologize for what? Wait, you've not heard the whole story!" And he went on, telling Miss Bennet's side of the story. And the farther he was going, the angrier he felt with his sister for the pain she had inflicted on his sweet Jane and himself. He wouldn't even have thought to blame Darcy for his role in revealing Miss Bennet's pseudo-scheme 'cause he was completely unaware of his self-no confidence and of the power his friend had on him.
"And so, the truth is that you and my sisters were wrong, that Caroline ill-treated both Miss Bennet and myself and, as if it were not enough, I added to Miss Bennet's sorrow by my unjust accusations."
Darcy's pride was hurt by the mention of an error his mind might have commit. Darcy's pride had been hurting for a while by a memory that was lingering far too often and too strongly of a lady and her fine eyes. Darcy's pride was shocked by the fact that his "pupil" was starting to think by himself, unexpectedly and in an opposite direction than his. Those reasons, among others, made his pride win over his reserve and he burst out a very loud:
"I was wrong?"
As every face in the room had turned to him, he lowered his voice and went on, contemptuously. "And pray, how would you know that? What argument did that man", his tone was even more despising on that word, "present you that could annihilate the ones I presented to you in November? A man who was not even present when the whole affair took place! A man who, as a tradesman, is more likely to be lying than saying the truth!"
Bingley had started at the beginning of Darcy's answer and was utterly shocked at the end. As it had happened during his discussion with Jane, his anger found a new recipient.
"Sir, I'd let you know that my father was a tradesman. And even if my sisters tend to forget it, I don't and I'm very proud of what he achieved. Thanks to him, I was able to study and I can pretend to be a gentleman. I will never forget it and I defy anyone to insult a man only because he earns money honestly, instead of living on the money accrued by others."
Darcy winced, understanding that he had been too far. Nevertheless, Bingley didn't let him reply.
"As for the truth in his side of the story, I'm now convinced that it is the entire truth. Why would have she fled crying if she had not been painfully hurt by my words? You convinced me two months ago that she had merely answered to my attentions without returning them, would you now try to convince me that she is artful enough to start sobbing whenever she wants? I happen to be too gullible but I am fully confident in this case. Even if she didn't love me as well as I did, back then, she loved me enough to be still sad a month after my leaving. And as long as she cared enough, did it really matter that she didn't love me? I might have even led her to return fully my feelings?"
Bingley's tone had lost some of its fury, as this feeling was really not in his nature and while speaking of his beloved, he could not but instilled tenderness in his voice. Darcy was at a loss as to what to reply. He could not but acknowledge some truth in his friend argumentation. Fortunately, the latter had not finished.
"And another fact fully proves that she was not answering positively my attentions for mercenary reasons back in Hertfordshire. She has been in town for almost as long as I, she has seen Caroline twice and she's never thrown herself into my path. If she had been that interested, she would have found a way to meet me, God, we did have our share of outings since mid-December." After a while, he added, anger coming back in his voice: "I really cannot forgive Caroline for her behavior. Why did she conceal me that Miss Bennet was in town? Does she think herself so above a gentleman's daughter because of some money her own father earned in trade? Can you find an explanation, Darcy?" His eyes were earnestly staring in his friend's. And what he thought he saw there was making him suspicious.
In fact, Mr. Darcy did feel more and more uncomfortable as the speech was going on, as his twitching his ring showed it. The concealment had been as much his idea as Miss Bingley's. He tried to voice his reasons (although he clearly knew they were not hers). "She probably thought that knowing she was in town would have been very painful to you. You were really poorly in early December..."
Light was dawning in Bingley's mind. He interrupted his friend curtly. "Come on Darcy. You are as aware as I that my sister didn't resent my behavior then. Hurst called you, for some of his own reasons, not Caroline. And had he not been for your help, I might still be drowned in wine." Looking intently at him, he added: "But that would have been your reason, wouldn't it?"
As Darcy's jaw was firmly clenched and his demeanor sterner and sterner, he went on, accusingly: "Did you know, Sir, that Miss Bennet was in town? Did you purposely conceal it from me?"
By now, the speed of Darcy's twitching was at its highest and one, not emotionally involved, could have wondered if his finger would not be soon detached from his hand. But Bingley was both too utterly dismayed and too deeply disappointed to find any humor in the situation. He waited for an answer, which finally came. "Yes I did. Miss Bingley informed me of the letters she has received and afterwards of Miss Bennet's call. I was really upset, it had been quite a trial to get you out of your gloom. You seemed to finally react and regain some of your cheerful behavior. I really thought that the knowledge of Miss Bennet's presence in London would drag you down immediately."
Bingley only understood the first part of Darcy's answer. His world was crumpling. His friend, his mentor, the man who had replaced his father in his mind had been lying to him. The man who claimed that he abhorred deception had purposely deceived him. He could not, he would not listen to his reasons. His fists were clenched, two purple spots had appeared on his cheeks, his eyes were cold, his voice was low as he was beyond rage. "Sir, I won't let this conversation go on. I don't care for your reasons, how am I to believe you now when you lied to me on the same subject? I perfectly remember your argumentation over Miss Bennet's so-called deception. I am sure that those same reasons were prevalent in your decision of hiding her presence. I thank you, Sir, but you have said quite enough. I don't think there is much to add." He stood, as if to take his leave.
For once in his life and because he was deeply ashamed of some of his past behavior in this matter, Darcy was at a loss for words. He didn't downcast his eyes, his pride would not have allowed that. But he received Bingley's reproach with humbleness, didn't stand up and, for once, allowed his companion to tower over him. He knew something had been destroyed between them, he knew he had been the major actor in this destruction. He knew he would have to ask forgiveness if he wanted not to lose a friend. And, seeing Bingley then, he was not even sure forgiveness would be given. But he wouldn't do it at the moment. It needed privacy and an ear somewhat disposed to hear it. Neither of those requirements was met. He eventually answered: "Charles, I will obey your wish and stop this conversation for now. But I do wish you to believe that I thought only of your interest (at least in my mind) in the decisions I made. I also wish to end this conversation in a more private place soon, therefore I will call on you in the morning tomorrow. Or, if you wish, I will be at home tonight. I beg you not to make any harsh decision, though. Take, at least, this advice from me." Eventually he stood. "I will let you leave now." He bowed to Bingley who behaved likewise and obviously didn't want to utter some other words, he then watched him left.
He sat heavily back in his armchair, ordered a Brandy in one sign, let his head fall back and closed his eyes. My God! What a mess! What did I do? What entered my mind? How did I allow myself to concealment and lie? Knowing that self-pitying wouldn't help him, he straighten, took his glass and sipped it, staring into nothingness. Poor Bingley! I'm not sure he found the comfort he came here for. I'm sorry for that... I'm sorry for so many things... I certainly didn't do him a favor. But it was all for him. How could I guess that Miss Bennet was honest? I have seen so many women trying to allure him into matrimony! He is so gullible! How could I know she was not toying with him? She didn't show any sign of deep attachment, did she? And he is such a catch, all the more for such a family... What a family! The uncle in seeds trade! Well, at least, he might be of interest for Bingley! He seemed to have impressed him! But he was shocked, he spoke to him just after his quarrel with her. I wonder what's happening in Cheapside... Did the uncle run back home to assure the niece that nothing was lost? But she did answer back, didn't she? Maybe she changed her mind after all!
By then, his glass was empty and, as he didn't think drinking would be of any help, he left and headed back to Holland Park Avenue* where his town house stood. All the way back, thoughts kept twirling in his head and he was more and more feeling that he would have many reasons to apologize to his friend.
* Author's note: I don't know of that street existed in early 19th century in London but Miss Fielding settled Mark Darcy's house there so I will gladly follow her!
Chapter 7
Well, at least, I have now a reason to fight. If I'm lucky enough to have her forgive me and give me the leave to court her, I must not let anyone interfere. God knows how we have both been ill-treated by all my relations. I'll act on my own mind even if I end making a fool of myself. I'm sure it won't be more painful than the pains I have already suffered.
To think that I have just one letter to gain my redemption! What shall I say? Maybe Darcy... The thought made him winced. That was finished. He would never ever ask him for advice now.
But how shall I do without him? 'Tis the first time in all our acquaintance he has ever failed me. Even when I first ran into him and knock him down because I was fleeing from some robbers in Cambridge. He stood for me then. And he always did afterwards, but for this time. Or maybe he thought he was standing just the same. But this time, he was wrong. His behavior had been strange all the while in Hertfordshire. He was not himself. I should have known better than to listen obediently... I shall wait and see. I haven't been fair to him. I will listen to him on the morrow. But not today, I have a letter to write! And a trial to prepare... He rang for the butler to inform him that he wished to see his sisters as soon as they came back.
He had to wait for almost an hour before a decided knock was heard at the library door. He didn't have the time to answer, as Caroline stormed into the room, complaining about this summon. Louisa was following her more dignifiedly. "What do you mean by ordering that we came to see you without delay?" asked the former, the last part being said in a snobbish imitation of the butler. Settling down in an armchair, she added: "I didn't even have time to rest although our shopping has been quite dreadful..."
Her very calm brother interrupted her, ironically: "It's nice to see you too, Caroline, Louisa! Please, sit down." Miss Bingley started, her mouth opened in a most unladylike position; Mrs. Hurst sat on a chair close to her sister, her features expressing also some surprise. "I summoned you in the library to inform you of a most surprising encounter I made today."
He watched his sisters' complexion going several tones whiter. Caroline finally uttered: "I can't see who you mean..."
"Can you not? Really? Well... I met Miss Bennet."
Her eyes betrayed her embarrassment as she glanced at Louisa but she had regained enough of her composure to answer almost immediately, and in, what she thought was her most natural astonished tone: "Why! Miss Bennet! Here, in London!"
"Yes, in Cheapside exactly."
"In Cheapside!!!" Her tone was at its utmost fake.
"Yes, you remember... her uncle... living in Cheapside..."
"Oh, yes, now that you say it..." She seemed to hesitate but finally added: "And, how was she?"
"She seemed fine. She told me she was much better than when she last saw you in Gracechurch Street."
"Really, I'm glad...hum... I mean..." Her eyes had fled from her brother's. A furious blush invaded her face. "When?...Where?... In Gracechurch Stret? I've never been in Gracechurch Street... Louisa..." She tried to have her sister as a witness but Mrs. Hurst was too ashamed of her behavior to play the game. Caroline managed to look back at her brother.
Charles's raising temper could only be perceived by the tapping of his fingers on the desk. In a voice as cold as previously, he answered: "Really? Maybe I misunderstood... Maybe she meant when she came to call on you here, in Grosvenor Square." His gaze was alternatively fixed upon his sisters'.
Louisa's eyes, wide opened, quickly sought her sister. Caroline gulped, moistened her lips, put back in place an imaginary lock of hair in her turban and cast down her head. "Well..." She raised her head in a defiant way. "We thought it was better if you didn't know. You didn't seem to miss her. I didn't want to see her but she came anyway."
In her eyes, her brother's reaction (or lack of, for the matter) to this beginning was satisfying enough for her to brighten and to add, in a despising tone: "I ignored her letters. You see, she is of no consequence here. Dear Georgiana is in London. She is such a delightful young lady... But, despite the lack of answer to her letters, Miss Bennet called. This is such a proof of her low upbringing. And I had to call back..." After a pause where she seemed to re-live difficult memories, she shuddered and said: "Dreadful visit!"
Louisa's feature now expressed her utter astonishment at her sister's answer. She looked back anxiously at their brother.
By then, Charles had stood up. He was pacing back and forth in the room, his temper being too high to remain quiet. Caroline came back abruptly from that past she would have liked to forget when he told her, in a manner she had never witnessed: "Miss Bingley, Mrs. Hurst ('cause I know you have had a role in that business), let me tell you what I think of your behavior in this whole matter." The fury in his voice was frightening and his sisters, for once, listened to what he had to say.
"First, I'd like to inform you that my meeting with Miss Bennet was very enlightening. I have now a very clear idea of what happened exactly in Hertfordshire. The only ones who deceived me were from my own family, not from Longbourn. I had rightly understood her attitude. Indeed, she was returning my feelings. I can clearly understand the betrayal she felt when I announced I was leaving for a few days and eventually never came back, I would have felt the same.
"And do you remember why I didn't come back? Let me repeat what you, Caroline, said then: 'Charles, do you really think Miss Bennet is worthy of you? She is without family, connection or fortune!' And when I answered that I cared for none of these but for mutual affection and respect, you replied: 'Brother, I cannot believe you're mistaking her. She is merely enjoying your attentions and her mother is probably already planning your wedding... Do you really think she's showing some respect when she's merely toying with your feelings?' Repeating your words is painful to me. You do not know how I have tortured myself with them." He stopped then, his voice as struggling to come out. Caroline was astonished by what was happening, Louisa seemed pained by her brother's narrative. Eventually, Charles's speech went on.
"I know now that you were utterly wrong. And your recent behavior towards Miss Bennet makes me think that you deceived me on purpose. I cannot fathom your reasons and I don't think I'm very interested anyway. But I cannot forgive you neither. Not only because of the sufferings I've been through, but because of her sorrow." His face was very pale, his features stern, his voice ice-cold. "Had I not a most urgent issue to solve, I would leave immediately to remove myself from your presences. As it happens, it seems that my happiness might still be linked to hers. Therefore, I will stay here, but you must understand that I'll do my best to limit our being in the same room. Therefore, if you have nothing else to say, I would appreciate if you were leaving the library."
By then, his sisters' reactions were alike, though not for the same reasons.
Caroline was shocked. She couldn't believe her sweet, kind brother had become that tough, bitter man able to tell her that he didn't want to see her anymore. I had underestimate the danger that Miss Bennet represented. I can't believe he chooses her over me. And the words he uses! Such a bad luck that he eventually met her! How can I reply? I certainly won't apologize! What have I to be sorry for? But he is in such a rage... Let's show some humility for now...
Her back as straight as always, her usual mask on her face, she followed her brother's injunction, stood up and walked to the door.
Louisa, also, was shocked. She understood both her brother's behavior and his reasons. She had witnessed his sorrow after their return from Hertfordshire but, as she couldn't fathom what love was about, she had merely tried to alleviate it by providing access to her husband's cellar. How hard must have been Charles's sufferings! How deep must be his affection for Miss Bennet! I know his sweet and kind nature, I know how it must have been difficult for him to decide and inform us that he no longer wishes to see us! Have I been voluntary involved in an unjust scheme? Caroline was honest when she described Miss Bennet's low family, connections and fortune but are these the foundations for a happy wedding? I live everyday the proof of the opposite! If she was indeed returning his affections, we have been very wrong and we owe Charles an apology.
She stood also and went to the door. Before exiting, she faced him, and, the clenching of her hands being a testimony of her mindset, she said. "Charles, I'll do as you wish. I'm sorry of your decision but I think I can understand it. I beg you to ask whatever you may need for the solving of your issue, it is the least I can do. Shall I give orders so that you'll have your dinner in the library?"
Some warmth in Mr. Bingley's eyes came back when he answered positively meanwhile Miss Bingley's eyes coldness was reinforced.
As he watched his sisters leaving the library, Charles felt some relief. He thought he had dealt quite well with them. Obviously, my message has been understood, I just wonder how true was Caroline's humility. But Louisa's answer seemed to come from the heart. She has some goodness, unfortunately, her life isn't as satisfying as it should. Had she not listen to Caroline, she probably wouldn't have wed Mr. Hurst, but if she wasn't married, Caroline couldn't have got married herself... As if it had been of any use so far! While thinking, he had gone to the cupboard to pour himself a glass of brandy.
Hold on, man! Remember what you have to do? Don't you think you need to be as sober as possible if you want to gain her forgiveness and regain her affections? He rang for tea, sat by the desk, took a sheet of paper and mended a pen.
Chapter 8
After quite a short night of restless sleep and a quick breakfast, Mr. Darcy had his horse saddled and rode it towards Grosvenor Square. The trip was short but he was ready to bet that he would gladly be outdoors after the interview he was about to have. He had long thought about the defence he would present to his friend (at least, he hoped he would still be his friend after the meeting) and, eventually, had decided against revealing his admiration for Miss Elizabeth. He had two main reasons to do so. Firstly, he was still not sure his interference in Bingley's love affair had been somewhere driven by the fight he had been struggling against his own mind. Secondly, if it had, indeed, he was clearly ashamed of it. He was already ashamed of so many things he was about to reveal to Bingley, there was clearly no use in adding this one.
In his sins list, the most painful one was, of course, the concealment of Miss Bennet's presence in London. Bingley was already aware of it but it didn't lessen his shame. His friend's opinion of him was very important but much less than his own.
The second one related to another aspect of his own-self respect. He had always prided himself in his cleverness in judging one's character, the very poor job he had done in Miss Bennet's case was a hard blow. He clearly remembered the conversation more like a fight of words, actually with Miss Elizabeth during the Netherfield ball. He had then boasted about his ability not to be blinded by prejudice. I'm afraid my understanding of Miss Bennet's attitude is a clear proof of the opposite. Even before I had set a foot in the Assembly room, I was prejudiced about the whole company. Soon after, I met Mrs. Bennet and then I was prejudiced about the Bennet family. But then, I didn't imagine their behavior at the Netherfield ball: total want of propriety from the father, the mother and the three youngest daughters! Even Miss Elizabeth showed distinctly some discomfort at several occasions because of them!
And, last but not least, at least in his mind, he had allowed Miss Bingley to manipulate him. Had she not insisted in going back to London right after his brother, he might have waited for Bingley to come back. But after that disastrous half hour at the ball, he had been too happy to get an excuse to flee, an excuse so utterly devoid of him and Miss Elizabeth. And had Bingley come back, he might have understood the true nature of Miss Bennet's feelings. He was pretty sure this part of the story was something that should never come to Fitzwilliam's ears. His dear cousin's wit would find there at least a year of sweet comments...
As often when one dreads an event to come, he found himself in the Hursts' hall before he felt ready for it. It took the butler all his experience not to show his surprise at the earliness of the call. Indeed the whole household knew that nobody would be up before late in the morning, as it was always the case, except for a journey, at the Hursts'. When, following Mr. Darcy's request, he spoke with Mr. Bingley's valet, he once again showed his worth by his self-control on hearing that Mr. Bingley had not slept in his bed. They found him soon after fast asleep in the library, among a heap of crumpled sheets of paper. His third and last (for our tale at least) exploit was his easiness in suggesting that Mr. Darcy made free use of the breakfast room, which was being set. One could think a butler's role was to replace the host but one does not know how Mr. Darcy was a very busy man, who never waited, who was known for that fact; and that that same Mr. Darcy had just informed him that he would wait for Bingley to wake up, as long as it may take.
Less than an hour after, a crumpled and half-awake Mr. Bingley emerged from the library. His night had been very short, the final 'Your humble, apologizing and loving, Charles Bingley' having been written at three in the morning. He had thought the writing would be quite long, as he wanted the letter to express faithfully all his feelings but he had been surprised to find on the mantel clock that it was already one thirty when he finished it.
On his last re-reading, he became aware of all the blots and that some words could be easily misread. He, who had always laughed at the carelessness of his writing, who almost took pride in it, was willing not to take a chance. He knew that a 'The con______ I had [blot], while in your company, completely faded because of the poi____ view presented by Mr. Darcy[blot]sister and the confidence I had in [blot]' could be read as 'The consideration I had shown, while in your company, completely faded because of the poised view presented by M. Darcy's sister and the confidence I had in her' as well as 'The confidence I had felt, while in your company, completely faded because of the point of view presented by Mr. Darcy and my sister and the confidence I had in them'. And for once in his life, he did care. So he had done his best to copy out his prose in an understandable and clean way, and after one hour and a half of struggle had finally achieved it.
So, after five hours of bad sleep in an armchair in front of a fading blaze and a quick check of the existence of the properly folded letter, he blinked and rubbed his eyes to erase the vision of Darcy pacing from the breakfast room to the hall and back. But first, it didn't vanished and then, the vision started to friendly greet him, not at all as impatient as the pacing had been.
"Bingley! Already awake? It's only eight!"
"Darcy! Is it really you?"
"Why, yes! Who do you want it to be? Awake may have been a too strong word, after all!"
Bingley was bewildered. Fitzwilliam Darcy was at the Hursts', at eight in the morning, teasing him although he rarely did that and definitely never after he had been waiting for some time as it was obviously the case. He remembered their previous day meeting and the conclusion of it and had determined that Darcy was there to end what had been started at White's. But Darcy's behavior was unreadable for him, at least for the moment. He decided to try his luck a little bit more and said: "You don't mind if I keep you waiting fifteen minutes longer, do you? I dearly need to freshen up if that's alright with you."
The answer came, as friendly as before: "Of course, of course. I'll wait for you in the breakfast room." Darcy bowed briefly and went back to the room.
Bingley, still not fully confident in the reality of the previous scene, headed to his room in his usual long step. He decided to be as quick as possible and, five minutes early, entered the breakfast room. Darcy commented on his better look and waited for him to be settled with a full plate and a warm cup of tea in front of him before he started: "Do you mind if I take benefit of your full mouth to complete my apology?"
Bingley shook his head to give his assent on the process.
Darcy breathed heavily and went on, hesitantly at first: "Bingley, first, I'd like to thank you for letting me speaking to you this morning... I saw you were very upset yesterday and I cannot blame you... Indeed, it must have been a very tough day!
But I digress... Actually, what I wanted to tell you are the reasons why I acted the way I have. You were in a really low mood after your sisters and I talked you out of going back to Hertfordshire in December. It was rather worrying to see you drinking so much and finding no interest in whatever we could suggest. I must say it made me wonder about the depth of you attachment for Miss Bennet. Back in Netherfield, I had watched your behaviour with a sense of déjà-vu. Why! You've been falling in love almost every couple of months since I know you! Remember the daughter of the Headmaster in Cambridge, your sister's maid some time later, Miss Thompson (and your lack of mourning when you realized she was engaged), Mrs. Bedisdon, although she was a widow 10 years your senior, and so on and so forth... And whether returned or not, the attentions usually vanished in a few weeks. I had no reasons to guess your feelings for Miss Bennet were not of the same kind!"
Mr. Bingley had gone on eating during the main part of the speech. He had smiled clumsily at the 'falling in love every couple of months' thing and stopped eating during the enumeration as it would have been horribly ungraceful, and dangerous, to laugh with a full mouth. At Miss Bennet's mention, he answered back: "Indeed, Darcy, I cannot understand you on this one. If my attentions for Miss Bennet had been equal to the one I had shown before, why preventing me from going back to Longbourn? A few weeks later, my infatuation would have been over and the whole Hertfordshire business finished. I probably would have kept Netherfield to almost never occupy the house. Period, that's it, settled.
"But you didn't let those events happen. You ran after me, back to London, to tell me some falsehoods about Miss Bennet, which I trusted because you, Darcy, have always been an example and a sound-advisor, because I've always relied on you, because you've always been here for me. Why following me, Darcy? Why interfering this time when, even for Mrs. Bedisdon, you had let me learn my lesson? Why, if it was some 'déjà-vu'?"
"Two reasons, actually. The first one relates to your sister..."
"Caroline! What did she do this time? She's always been a horrible snob but she outdid herself in Hertfordshire! It struck me more than once that the only countryside of which I've never heard her complaining of are the surroundings of Pemberley! So what did she do? Beg you to take her back to London? You've never really yielded to her, why this time?"
"Well... She didn't beg me to take her back to London, although she clearly couldn't leave while some guests remain in her house! But she confirmed my opinion that you were seriously smitten with Miss Bennet. I see you frown... yes, I had noticed that your partiality for Miss Bennet was beyond what I had ever witnessed in you, but only after an attentive observation of your behaviour, caused by Sir William Lucas's accidental information that your attentions to her had given rise to a general expectation of your marriage. He spoke of it as a certain event, of which the time alone could be undecided. And as Sir William made his disclosure during your ball, while I was dancing with Miss Elizabeth Bennet, you will see for yourself that it was a rather young knowledge to me when we came back in London.
Miss Bingley also confirmed Miss Bennet's low connections, at least for her family in London and in Meryton. But that want of connection was not so great an evil to you, her father being a gentleman. There were, nevertheless, other causes of repugnance: the situation of Miss Bennet's mother's family, though objectionable, was nothing in comparison of that total want of propriety so frequently, so almost uniformly, betrayed by herself, by her three younger sisters, and occasionally even by her husband. You may have been completely blinded by Miss Bennet's presence at your ball but I can tell you that even Miss Elizabeth Bennet was obviously shocked by her family!"
"Do not underestimate me, Darcy! I might have overlooked some events but I had not lost my sense. I remember clearly a difficult moment during the supper and I can tell you that Miss Bennet was as shocked as her sister. But you must acknowledge that Miss Bennet, and Miss Elizabeth since you mentioned her, have conducted themselves so as to avoid any share of the like censure and that praise is generally bestowed on them both for their sense and disposition."
"Indeed I do, Bingley. And I think that Miss Bingley would also, at least in Miss Bennet's case, should she be here... But the fact that your sisters' uneasiness had been equally excited with my own; once our coincidence of feeling was discovered, we thought it sensible to lose no time in detaching you from Miss Bennet. Therefore we shortly resolved on joining you directly in London; and there I readily engaged in the office of pointing out to you, my friend, the certain evils of such a choice."
"And you described, and enforced them earnestly..." Bingley sadly concluded.
"My sole objective was to preserve you from what I esteemed a most unhappy connection." Darcy's tone was most sympathetic.
After a while, Bingley started anew. "But, however this remonstrance might have staggered or delayed my determination, I do not think that it would have prevented my proposing marriage to Miss Bennet. Had you not given me the assurance of her indifference, I would have gone back to Hertfordshire and ask for her hand..."
Before his friend's anger burst back, Darcy answered. "Bingley, earlier, you've kindly described the confidence you used to have in me. Even if I recently proved that it was misplaced, I ask you to trust me there... Once I started observing you, I also watched Miss Bennet. Her look and manners were open, cheerful, and engaging as ever, but without any symptom of peculiar regard. I remained convinced from the scrutiny I made there, that though she received your attentions with pleasure, she did not invite them by any participation of sentiment.
"According to what you told me yesterday, I must have been in an error. If it be so, if I have been misled by such error, to inflict pain on you and her, the resentment you showed at White's has not been unreasonable. But I shall not scruple to assert that the serenity of her countenance and air was such as might have given the most acute observer a conviction that, however amiable her temper, her heart was not likely to be easily touched. I was probably... make that certainly... desirous of believing her indifferent, but I will venture to say that my investigations and decisions are not usually influenced by my hopes or fears, as you very well know. I did not believe her to be indifferent because I wished it; I believed it on impartial conviction, as truly as I wished it in reason." After a silence, he finished: "Knowing you were about to be trapped in a loveless marriage, with a most horrid family-in-law, ..., I would not have been you friend, had I not try to prevent this union. That was, obviously, my second reason for interfering."
During the late explanation, Bingley had looked disappointed, mainly because he had now the confirmation that the man he looked up to had failed. And that failure had happened at one of the most crucial moment of his life. But he was also confident that Darcy was honest in his confession: he really had not understood Jane's true feelings. He thought it fair to tell him. "I believe you, Darcy. I cannot say that I forgive you, not yet, but I believe you."
"I understand..." Darcy could have stopped there. So far, he had acted according to his principles, stating what he thought most thoroughly was the truth. The last part of his confession was the hardest but for the sake of recovering his own self-esteem, he had to make it.
"I would also understand if you'd wish never to see me again after what I have to say next... In fact, that's the real reason of my coming. As painful as the consequence of my role played so far must have been, I see no reason to apologise." Bingley winced, Darcy stood up from the breakfast table. He walked to the window, his hands joined behind his back, his right fingers toying, once again, with his signet ring and stared far away.
"But for what I did afterwards, I am to blame. I did have good reasons but not good enough." He turned back to Bingley and gazed right in his eyes. "Miss Bingley had told me of the letters she had received from Miss Bennet and of her presence in London. While we felt confident enough that we would not meet in any gathering, due to the difference in our circles, we had not expected Miss Bennet's call. But as you were not here when she came, we still had the chance to conceal her presence from you. The decision was taken by the three of us. Miss Bingley and I were adamant, Mrs. Hurst was hesitating. I tell you that to take full responsibility of the fault." His posture was tense but his tone was calm. He was doing the right thing and already felt better.
His friend's demeanour was quite similar. Anger could never last long with him and he was really not a resentful man. He had agreed to receive Darcy to listen to his reasons; he wanted now to have his hopeful suspicions confirmed. "You've already told me that yesterday Darcy. I vaguely recall you tried to explain why afterwards but I was not ready to hear then. I am now." His voice was poised. He had the strange feeling that his relationship with Darcy was changing very quickly. Well, right at the moment, he was demanding justifications to Darcy. That was a very new situation.
Darcy also saw the evolution in Bingley. He felt as if he had now an equal in front of him, someone who would now use his sense, which had never been lacking, with confidence. "I'm glad you are. My reasons for concealing Miss Bennet's presence in London lay on the fear I had to see you go back to the very sad mindset you were in after we convinced you not to go back to Netherfield. You are my friend, Charles, if I can do something to alleviate your pain, I have to decide if I do it or not. My fault was that I overlooked your own sense. I didn't think you would be able to make what I thought was the good decision. Too much vanity there... who was I to know what was the good decision."
Bingley was almost smiling. His suspicions were confirmed: Darcy had only acted in the way he thought was the best for him. No pride or haughtiness had interfered and for that he was relieved. "I thank you for your frankness. I cannot blame you for considering me as an immature child, I relied on you for every decisions I made since a decade. Had I not asked and followed your advice for very step of my life, you wouldn't have acted that way, would you?"
Darcy didn't answer but his feature showed an embarrassed agreement.
"But now Darcy, the puppy has grown up. For sure, he will never be a wolf! But he will be an efficient, smart and reliable hound, both for himself and for his friends. I accept your apology and will probably forgive you entirely as soon as I have won Miss Bennet back." His smile was confident and contagious: Darcy was smiling also.
He walked towards his friend who stood up. "Do I still have the honour of calling you my friend?"
"Indeed you do, Sir!" Bingley's extended hand was readily taken and shook by a very relieved Darcy.
After a somewhat embarrassed silence of two smiling gentlemen happy to have settled their quarrel, they took a new cup of tea, sat back at the table and Bingley decided to explain his morning appearance. "Would you care to know the reason of my night in the library?"
"I must say I was quite surprised to see you coming out from there. It used to be your libation room but I had thought those days were over."
"Truly, the thought of forgetting this whole day with brandy crossed my mind. Indeed, yesterday, after Miss Bennet, her uncle and you, I confronted Caroline and Louisa. A frightful day, isn't it?" Darcy nodded. "But I had a most important task to perform and I needed a head as clear as possible." He leaned lightly toward his friend and lowered his voice. "Mr. Gardiner authorized me to write a letter to Miss Bennet to apologize and explain. Unfortunately I cannot call on her at the first hour of the morning as some are prompt to do..."
Darcy was smiling mainly because he was happy his friend was able and willing to tease him anew. Nevertheless he was surprised of his friend's choice of method to apologize. "Maybe not at some ungodly hour but surely, at the conventional time..."
Bingley was shaking his head. "Had you heard and seen her yesterday, you wouldn't say that. I need to make my point; I need to enter the barriers she must have built. If I merely say something, she may only hear a part of it. And if I'm in front of her, I may lose my temper or my confidence. No no no, a letter was the best possible method. And I wrote it!"
Mr. Darcy seemed appreciative but somehow doubtful.
"I can see your doubt in my ability to express myself..."
"Not to express yourself. But you have always prided yourself in the carelessness of your writing. I'm entitled to have some doubts!"
Bingley's answer came, sturdily and definitive: "You must not trouble yourself on my behalf, my friend. It took me around six hours to compose it and one hour and a half to write it clearly. No blot, no unfinished word or sentence. Believe me, it is not some usual Bingley's claptrap." After a while he added: "But as it is quite private, I don't plan on showing it to you."
Darcy noticed the lack of question mark at the end of the last sentence. Actually, it would have been awkward for him to read it. With pride for his friend's achievement in a few hours, he congratulated him and asked him how he was going to have the letter deliver.
"I plan on calling in Gracechurch Street this morning to deliver it myself. But as it is still too early, I had thought I would ride in Hyde Park first. Care to join me?"
"I would be delighted, I had planned so myself."
Bingley seemed to have reached a decision. "You know what? You should come with me to Gracechurch Street. I could introduce you to Mr. Gardiner. I'm sure you would find him interesting. This man does run a healthy business in plants!"
Darcy understood the meaning of his friend's proposal. For him, it was also a way of apologising to Bingley and Miss Bennet. After a short thinking, he agreed and, once Bingley's horse had been saddled, they left for some exercise.