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Chapter 11
Elizabeth took her morning tea in the study to gain the opportunity for some solitary time so she might write to Jane. As she expressed her joy and offered her congratulations to her dearest sister, she could not refrain from posing questions about all the plans that must now begin for the wedding. While in the midst of this occupation her thoughts drifted to Fitzwilliam. It is satisfying to think of him by his given name. And to know he wished it so pleased her immensely. I feel a little indiscreet with the arrangement. But she would not consider changing it. She continued on with the slow pace of her letter writing as an irrepressible smile spread across her face.
But it vanished soon enough with her next thought. What is to be done about Lydia? She had yet to speak to her about yesterday and was still unsure what she might say to her would have any influence. She tried to gather some thoughts but found she was distracted by memories of the previous evening.
All that she had previously believed, and believed with conviction, about Fitzwilliam had been proven false. Well, not all. Elizabeth knew that she had not been completely mistaken in her initial judgment of him. The pride that had been on the surface, exposed to the scrutiny of those newly acquainted with him, was real but it had concealed the complexity of what lay inside him.
What she had failed to see was the depth of the man's character.
And, she now firmly deemed it was his strength of character that had compelled him to change. She knew it with the same degree of certainty that she had in her feelings for Fitzwilliam.
Her eyes fell upon the bookcase and she remembered with vivid clarity all that he had said and done while they stood there. I still dare not believe all that has happened between us. His attentions had been full of concern. I could never have imagined how satisfying it would be to be ministered to in such a way. She dared to think further. I would welcome the thrill of it all again. Her heart quickened and she raised her hand to feel it beating wildly.
It was inevitable for Elizabeth to now wonder if Fitzwilliam would renew his offer. She wanted to feel with certainty that he would. But I cannot. Regardless of his open display of affection towards her, she was not so foolish as to discount the affect her words had on him at Hunsford. She assumed that he had an inclination to proceed slowly with whatever may be developing between them.
But there was no doubt on her part what her answer would be should he renew his offer.
With great difficulty, she pushed these reflections from her mind to focus again on her letter. It did, however, require a greater length of time to complete the lines than would be normal; such was her concentration this day. Therefore, it was a good deal longer before she returned to the rest of the family.
Mr. Wickham was to join the ladies for the midday meal and as they waited for his arrival Mrs. Gardiner detected an uneasy air between the sisters. While these times were a strain for all the family, she was concerned that perhaps some other issue was at fault.
"How was Mr. Wickham's visit yesterday Lydia?" she ventured to her niece.
"Very nice Aunt, we walked the long way through the park," she answered Mrs. Gardiner but looked to her sister when she responded. Elizabeth said nothing nor did she even look up from her sewing, which she had resumed with some eagerness.
"Did Lizzy go along with you?" Mrs. Gardiner next asked of Lydia, whereby Lydia nodded her head and Elizabeth continued to be engrossed in her sewing.
She now tried the Elizabeth. "Lizzy, what of you? Did you find the walk refreshing?"
Lydia looked keenly to her sister to see what she would say and heard her reply, "Not enough to wish repeating it any time soon. I will say I found certain aspects of it thought provoking and was enlightened by the relationship of my sister and her fiancé." With that Elizabeth gave Lydia a severe look.
"Indeed, in what way?" Mrs. Gardiner stopped her work to pay close attention.
Elizabeth smiled most insincerely at Lydia and said, "Oh, just the little nuances and subtleties that exist between the intended couple." And with that she would say no more.
The relationship of the sisters continued along in this fashion over the course of the days that followed. There were no more repeated scenes like that which had occurred, but there was only the minimum measure of courtesy extended to Lydia by her sister. This hurt Lydia as much as it was possible for her suffer, but she found it easy to forget once she was with Mr. Wickham. Shopping for the wedding clothes had left her distracted as well, and now that she was outfitted she paraded around her room in all the finery on a daily basis.
Mr. Gardiner had replied to Mr. Bennet's letter the very day it was received. There were particulars about the dischargement of Mr. Wickham's debts and of his entry into the regulars to advise the family.
The letter had been received and the contents revealed to Mrs. Bennet and his daughters. Upon hearing that the regiment was quartered in the North, she launched into a lengthy outburst bemoaning her daughter's departure for parts so distant. Then she appealed to her husband that the newlyweds come to Longbourn after the wedding ceremony. She desperately wanted to see her daughter and show off her married state around Meryton. Mr. Bennet began with a complete refusal, but came around to agreement when Jane went to lengths to persuade him to allow Lydia to be noticed by her family on the occasion of her marriage. Mrs. Bennet then began to promote the possibility of going to London to be at the wedding, whereupon each time this subject was broached, Mr. Bennet quitted the room without comment and escaped to his study.
Had he given in to his proclivity, there would not be an hour of the day Mr. Darcy would not but be by Elizabeth's side. However, with the distasteful possibility of putting himself in a social situation with Wickham, he had refrained from attempting to call on the lady as often as he would wish.
There had been an invitation to lunch with Georgiana one day. After the young ladies had retired to the music room he conveniently made his presence available to them. A most pleasing hour had been spent in her company. They had never been alone that afternoon and yet it was, at times, as if it was only the two of them in the room. There were lingering moments when their eyes met, and would not be drawn away. The language of these looks was as provocative to Darcy as was his memories of their kisses, for they held a promise of more such delights.
He had also called to see Elizabeth and they had enjoyed a pleasant walk through the park. He recalled a particular point with much amusement:
As they walked along a path adjoining the lake, there was a family of ducks, the chicks nearly grown and ready to leave their parents, for it was late summer now.
"Elizabeth, I observe Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner taking exceptional care with their children. Their devotion is to be admired. The attention they give them is most uncommon in the parental context."
"Yes, parenting varies greatly with the individuals Fitzwilliam. My aunt and uncle maintain that attention from the maternal and paternal figures is of great importance and they attend to their child rearing with great seriousness." She had smiled at him when she spoke of this and then added, "I would have to agree with their approach for they are having excellent results with their efforts."
He had looked upon her with a gleam in his eye and a wicked grin upon his face and said, "I could not agree with you more Elizabeth. And, if I might say, I believe that you will one day make an excellent mother."
Elizabeth lost her capability to speak from this interchange. She was completely stunned. He then saw the colour rise on her body. It went from her chest to her neck and then all the way to her cheeks and her forehead. He had quickly diverted his eyes from her, for at that moment, to look upon certain parts of her that were flushed would have been highly suggestive. When the conversation resumed, an entirely new topic was approached.
He enjoyed reflecting on this for he found great delight in the conversation as well as her reaction.
The night at the Gardiners had been a turning point for Darcy. Every time he evoked a detail of it, it was sweet torment. Ruminations of what it would be to hold Elizabeth in his arms was no longer only in his imagination. Now, when he thought of her, there was certainty to the smoothness of her skin, the flavour of her kisses and the heat of her body. When he recalled the richness of her hair as it tangled between his fingers or the way she shivered when his lips sought hers, he knew the satisfaction of these acts. And then, he tortured himself in recalling her touch upon him and her light breath as it mingled with his and the heartwarming fulfillment he received as they embraced so secretly.
But, in fact, the meetings between them were not of the same nature as that special night. No similar opportunities had presented themselves and Darcy knew to continue along in that way would be testing his resolve. He was only human, and he rightly judged his weakness for Elizabeth to be great. What they had shared together only strengthened his love but he meant it when he told her of his intentions and he would honour his word. He did not want her reputation compromised.
And yet simply stealing away and seizing time alone seemed innocent enough; they were harming no one with a few stolen kisses.
An engagement would go a long way in easing any furore over such activity. Indeed, it was his wish.
And a marriage would allow me to lock the door and send everyone away, except Elizabeth! And that was his goal.
With all that had happened, Mr. Darcy had come to a conclusion. My limit has been reached. He could endure no longer without Elizabeth as his wife. He had determined to wait only until after Lydia and Wickham's wedding and then again request his lovely Elizabeth's hand. I believe I shall ask her before she can leave the church.
It was not possible for him, however, to avoid the occasion to dine one evening with Caroline Bingley and Mr. and Mrs. Hurst, as their presence in London could not be entirely ignored. Thus they were received one evening at Mr. Darcy's home. Mr. Darcy was of a mind to raise a particular subject and waited until all were enjoying the fine meal that was prepared.
"I am afraid I have been remiss in my congratulations to your brother," he began, for Elizabeth had informed him of the engagement between Miss Jane Bennet and his good friend.
Caroline Bingley looked upon him with some confusion, "Why Mr. Darcy, whatever do you speak of?"
"Now Miss Bingley, you must be teasing me. Surely you know to what I refer." But he suddenly realised that she might not be unaware of the state of her brother's affairs.
"Sir, I am afraid you have the advantage over me. Pray, what is it? This is most mysterious, is it not Louisa?" Caroline found this to be quite amusing. But when Miss Bingley looked to her sister, she saw comprehension dawn on her face and with it a look of mortification and dejection.
Caroline looked to Mr. Darcy again and tried to remain composed, "Sir, enough of this jesting. I insist you explain your comment."
"I must apologise, for when I first spoke, I assumed you to be informed. I now realise that this must not be the case and that your brother has once again neglected his letter writing duties. I suppose one cannot blame him in this case for his distraction must indeed be great." He then looked to each of his guests before he announced, "It is not every day that one becomes engaged to Miss Jane Bennet."
There was an inability to speak from both sisters and while Mr. Hurst was silent, he continued to consume his meal without allowing any interruption. The sisters stared awkwardly at one another and found no words that would be appropriate to voice their thoughts at this moment. Mr. Darcy then continued on in conversation with Georgiana until his guests again ventured to participate. The mood of certain members of the party had deteriorated considerably, and an early night was made of the evening.
Enough days had passed that there remained but one before Lydia's wedding. When they were assembled for their morning meal, Mrs. Gardiner ventured to Lydia about her plans with Mr. Wickham, for they had kept to the agreement that the couple would spend no time alone, and Mrs. Gardiner was to insure today was no exception. Lydia then let it be known that Mr. Wickham would not be calling on her today as he had much to do with finalizing his preparations for departure up North to meet his new regiment. She intended to pack her trunks this morning so all would be in readiness for tomorrow. This news was initially met with no mistrust by any of those who heard it.
It was not until later in the afternoon that Elizabeth began to ponder some specifics. They came to her without any solicitation on her part; indeed the doubts they produced were most unwelcome. Once her concern was alerted she quickly sought out her aunt and found her supervising the play of her children.
"Aunt, please I must speak to you with some urgency. It concerns Mr. Wickham," she spoke with a measure of distress in her voice.
"Lizzy, what is it? I am always on guard when it comes to any dealings with that man."
"While I cannot give any evidence, his actions worry me." When her aunt looked unclear about her meaning, she continued, "It is only speculation, but, oh Lord, dare I say, I think that perhaps Mr. Wickham has the intention of abandoning Lydia."
Her aunt's face immediately took on a grave look. "Be careful Lizzy, for this is indeed too serious to be imprecise. Tell me exactly why you have come to this assumption." With this her aunt clasped Elizabeth's hand for the possibility was too much to bear.
"Yesterday, Mr. Wickham called very early. Do you recall? He was gone before morning tea. This was unusual; he always makes his visits later in the day and he usually extends them for lengthy periods. Yesterday's visit could not have been more than half an hour." Her aunt listened with growing concern. "I overheard his remarks when he said his goodbyes to Lydia. Both his words and his conduct were altered."
Mrs. Gardiner interrupted her here to interject quickly, "In what way Lizzy?"
Elizabeth looked to her knowingly and continued, "He has always spoken in a rather forward way to Lydia, one which I find somewhat inappropriate. Nevertheless, Lydia finds it charming. Upon his departure yesterday, he was formal, to the point of being rather distant and his words were odd."
By now her aunt was shaking her head for she knew that she would not like whatever was about to be disclosed to her.
"Let me recite this as precisely as I can, for I do not wish to make a mistake," and then , with great concentration, she slowly recited Mr. Wickham's parting words.
I must go now, Dear Lydia.
As it is said, "Parting is such sweet sorrow" and this moment is indeed that.
When we meet again, we shall regard each other very differently,
for our lives are at a crossroads, which will take us to new beginnings.
I can only say to you, my wish for the future, for you and I,
is that our choices bring us happiness.
Good Bye My Dear.
"When I heard him speak, I assumed he was just rambling on with more of his gibberish. I thought it a rather silly speech. But now, I see it could have a very different implication."
Mrs. Gardiner sat still and spoke not a word. Her eyes rested upon her children.
"If he intended to flee, he would by now have more than a full day's advantage. And, if we did not suspect, he would be gone a full two days before we would discover it tomorrow." Elizabeth paused, for all she said grieved her. "Perhaps I make too much of it all. My imagination is far too active, do you not think?"
Mrs. Gardiner looked grimly at her. "Indeed, your imagination may be working at a pace too great to suit us, but I think it best, because of our duty to protect Lydia, to insure Mr. Wickham has not left her." With that she rose, called for the maid and explained that her children would need to be supervised this afternoon as she and her niece had urgent business taking them away from the house. They spoke not with Lydia, leaving the maid to pass the message on to her. Within five minutes they were out of the house making great haste down the street towards Mr. Gardiner's warehouses.
Once Mr. Gardiner had been located, the story was quickly told to him, and it was agreed that they ought to confirm Mr. Wickham's whereabouts. But, while Mr. Gardiner had a general knowledge of where his rooms where, no specifics had ever been passed on to him. So, the group hastened in Mr. Gardiner's carriage to Mr. Darcy's townhouse as they found it necessary to garner the information from that gentleman. They could only hope he was at home.
Mr. Darcy was exceedingly surprised to find the assemblage that had gathered in his foyer. He allowed his eyes to meet Elizabeth's and perceived immediately that all was not well. Then he detected the mood of the whole party. Even so, he offered them refreshment, which was declined quickly by Mr. Gardiner, before the purpose of their visit unfolded. Elizabeth was made to repeat her speech, which she had already delivered twice in the course of an hour. She did it with anguish for she had already some premonition as to how this day might end.
Mr. Darcy received it in much the same way as her Uncle. And he agreed that it would be prudent to ascertain that Mr. Wickham was honouring his agreement.
After he had hastily grabbed his walking stick and hat, the party descended the steps of his townhouse. Mr. Darcy politely took Elizabeth's arm to guide her and asked discreetly, "Are you well Elizabeth?" Her appearance was more than subdued; she seemed wholly dispirited. She nodded her head as he handed her into the carriage.
Instructions were relayed to the driver whereby the carriage took off with some speed, now with Mr. Darcy in the party sitting quite comfortably close to Elizabeth. He gave her more than one look of open concern while they rode through the streets. When they at last stopped, the curtains were drawn and the ladies were admonished not to leave the safety of the carriage. The driver was instructed to guard the ladies through flood, fire or famine and then Mr. Darcy and Mr. Gardiner dashed down the lane with great speed.
The landlord lazed in the doorway of his establishment and recognised the polished gentleman that was fast approaching him. He straightened up to greet him but before he could utter a word, Darcy was upon him.
"We would like to speak with Mr. Wickham. Is he in his rooms?" Mr. Darcy was not going to wait for a reply; he began to enter the building. But the words of the landlord stopped him.
"Mr. Wickham? No Sir, he was gone yesterday morning. Bright and early. All his things gone with him. And before I could collect his back rent. He hadn't come back and I say good riddance." The man brightened somewhat when Mr. Darcy flipped a coin to him.
"Thank you Sir, thank you very much indeed," the landlord called.
As they made some haste back to the carriage, Mr. Darcy and Mr. Gardiner exchanged some remarks about Mr. Wickham that would have been highly improper to be repeated in front of the women.
Chapter 12
The driver had taken his duties to heart. As the ladies waited within the safe confines of the compartment, he had shooed away many a beggar child and curious passer-by, all of whom tried to get a closer look at the carriage or the occupants within. They were certain it was the property of someone wealthy and important; they witnessed the imposing men as they had hurried away.
The gentlemen were first seen returning by Mrs. Gardiner, who was looking for them through parted curtains. She spoke ominously under her breath, "Oh no!" She knew that Wickham had not been found simply by looking at the men.
Elizabeth's attention had been directed out of the carriage window on the other side. She had been absently watching as some men attempted to load barrels onto the back of a cart. But upon hearing her aunt, she looked the other way. Her heart fell for there could be no mistake in interpreting the look that her aunt gave her.
At that moment a most unpleasant feeling begin to overtake her, one of equal disbelief and hopelessness. She rightly sensed that this was plunging her into a deeper state of grief than she had experienced upon initially hearing of Lydia's plight while she was in Lambton.
Darcy could be heard instructing the driver once again. Then the carriage door opened and both gentlemen quickly climbed in. Before anyone could speak, there was a lurch forward and they were off.
"Oh Lord! Is it true then? Mr. Wickham is gone?" Elizabeth first searched Mr. Gardiner's face before turning to Mr. Darcy. Neither gentleman spoke. Mr. Gardiner gave a curt nod and looked upon his wife with the bleakest of expressions. Darcy's face was stern and expressionless masking the rage that was seething within him. He picked out a spot across from him, above Mrs. Gardiner's head and simply stared.
Elizabeth began to pull on the finely stitched edges of her handkerchief. Very soon she had broken a thread and was loosening it to making the end unravel. Her brow was creased in worry as she looked from one to the other in the carriage compartment.
It was not offered up where they were going and a tense silence descended over them. This time the ride was short, with one or two quick turns before stopping in the same general area, only a few streets down. The gentlemen alighted without ceremony and the women saw them get their bearings before Darcy directed Mr. Gardiner which way to proceed. Then the carriage door was closed and Elizabeth and her aunt were once again left alone.
As the gentlemen hastened down another lane, they brushed past two young women in dresses that were perched quite hazardously along the edges of their shoulders. The 'ladies' called out to them as they went past but their offers were fully ignored. It was to Mrs. Young's house they went to try and obtain any information that she would release.
Discovering the correct doorway, they rapped loudly and pushed their way inside when the door was cracked open. Mrs. Young stood off in a dim hallway giving the appearance of a trapped animal. They bombarded her with questions of the scoundrel Wickham. She was unhelpful in the extreme, professing no knowledge of his movements or whereabouts. As they knew her to be proficient with her lies, the gentlemen elected not to believe her and spoke to her as they would not to any other woman of their acquaintance. It was made very clear of the consequences that would come about if it were discovered she was concealing him. Still, she maintained her story and the gentlemen had no choice but to depart without gaining any information.
As they made their way back to the carriage, the 'ladies' in the lane goaded the gentlemen with vulgar promises, but were again rebuffed, as they swept past. More malevolent comments about Mr. Wickham were traded back and forth between the gentlemen as they began walking back and this time the man's poor mother was unintentionally slandered in the process.
Once they had begun to make their way back to Mr. Darcy's residence, the mood amongst them had descended even further, if it was possible. Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner exchanged their dismal thoughts without words, so well did they know each other. Darcy retained his impenetrable mask to disguise his fury.
Elizabeth did not need to question the gentlemen; it was only necessary to read their faces and ascertain the facts. She challenged the events of the last hours with incredulity. They are not to be believed. And yet, there was nothing else she could do but accept the nightmare that had unexpectedly been thrust upon her, her sister and the rest of her family.
Elizabeth withdrew into herself and gradually began to fall apart. The confined space of the carriage began to close in around her and she found it difficult to breathe. She endeavoured to hide this from the party by tucking her shaking hands under her legs, but it was apparent by the strain upon her face that she was experiencing some trauma. No one as yet understood the depths of her malice.
The obvious course to proceed with was to discuss the possibilities and the scope of action that might be taken. When they reached Darcy's home, Mr. Gardiner agreed to his suggestion to come inside where they might discuss matters further. At first Mrs. Gardiner felt the ladies should return to Gracechurch Street, but immediately that was vetoed for their anguish would be impossible to disguise and Lydia would be alerted immediately to the trouble.
So, as Elizabeth remained silent, it was settled by the other three that they should accompany the gentlemen inside. Darcy offered her his arm as the climbed up the steps to the entrance. As she slipped her hand through he felt her fingers tighten against him. He hand went to hers, covering it in a gesture that went entirely unnoticed by her. She set her concentration upon watching the steps as she took them slowly, one by one.
When they had gathered in the foyer, the butler approached Darcy and inquired about opening the main drawing room to receive the guests. Darcy made it known they would retire to his private rooms; he did not want to cross paths with his sister, for she had no knowledge about the business with Wickham and it would surely not do her any good to discover the situation.
They were led down one of the many hallways that wove through his house. He paused outside a doorway, politely allowing his guests to enter before him. Once they stepped inside, it was evident that this was his personal domain, a kind of combined study and library that had the signs of his daily use throughout. There were well-worn leather chairs and sofas arranged around a carved marble fireplace. A stack of books, each book-marked by the reader, was haphazardly arranged on an end table. Several broadsheets were on the seat of one of the chairs. Correspondence, both opened and unopened, lay in neatly divided piles upon a beautifully inlaid desk that stood in the opposite corner of the room. Thick carpets covered the floor and bookcases lined the walls, which were rich, dark wood; the entire atmosphere was intimate, secure and masculine.
Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner took it all in and felt they knew Mr. Darcy better from this rare glimpse into the realm reserved for his privacy.
But Elizabeth could not. Her distress had not decreased and she was barely aware of where she was. As her thoughts repeatedly anguished over the matter at hand she detected in herself signs of heightened emotional torment. She wished it were not so, but her attempts to reverse the affect that Mr. Wickham's disappearance had on her were in vain.
Darcy had succeeded in regaining some measure of his faculties that had been lost to him while in the carriage; he now attempted to make Mrs. Gardiner and Elizabeth comfortable as he fully understood the angst they must be experiencing. Each was pressed to have some wine.
Elizabeth suspended twisting her handkerchief long enough to reach out and accept the proffered glass. But she was unable to hold it so severely were her hands shaking.
"My God, Elizabeth, you are quite ill!" he exclaimed with no regard to the familiar form of address he used in the company of her relatives. Her condition elicited some great concern from Darcy. He quickly took the glass away and sat close by her, taking her hands in his to stop their shaking. He noticed that they were extremely cold. "Mrs. Gardiner, please, will you hand me that blanket?" Mr. Darcy indicated to a deep blue cashmere rug that was folded across the back of the one of the sofas. He placed it around Elizabeth's shoulders and wrapped her up. He then took up her hands again as he studied her in mute fretfulness.
The Gardiners traded looks across the room that displayed astonishment at Mr. Darcy's words and actions. But the welfare of their niece was foremost upon their minds and they now approached her and looked upon her with open concern. Mrs. Gardiner had moved to the other side of Elizabeth and placed an arm around her shoulders. She saw no response from her and the shaking continued.
It was clear Darcy was becoming quite agitated. Seeing Elizabeth ill affected him to the highest degree. He stood up and began to pace as he thought of what he might do. He saw she still shivered. After studying her for some moments Darcy insisted to Elizabeth's aunt, "I know not what to do madam, what might relieve her distress?"
"Lizzy? Are you all right, dear? Come now, this will all be sorted out. It is not for you to become so upset," Mrs. Gardiner looked at her with some concern before she rose and went to her husband's side. She was about to suggest that they return home with their niece when Elizabeth spoke.
In a voice so small that they could barely hear her, she said, "I know, but I cannot...." She broke off there and began to cry. Not with a wailing or a great burst of emotion, but in silent tears that began to roll from her eyes that increased in volume and would not cease to flow.
Darcy had returned to her side, and he had no sooner settled next to her before Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner saw Elizabeth's hand reach out from under the blanket and find his. Another look passed between husband and wife, this one questioning just what the current status was between the pair.
Her suffering was weighing heavily on the man who loved her. He automatically took out his crisp handkerchief with his free hand and dabbed at the tears on Elizabeth's cheeks, unaware and unconcerned as to how this might look to the Gardiners. His only thought at that moment was to comfort Elizabeth.
She raised her eyes and they looked at each other. Elizabeth leaned intuitively into him as he opened his arms and held her close. Darcy began to speak softly to her. Only Elizabeth heard his soothing words. It was apparent that his ministrations eased her distress to some degree; she had stopped crying.
Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner were extremely worried about their niece. She was not prone to such degrees of emotional expression. They were also most seriously interested in that which was exchanging between her and Mr. Darcy.
Once again husband and wife shared a silent thought. This one was of understanding as they watched him console Elizabeth with a kindness that spoke volumes of his feelings for their niece. His worry over Elizabeth was extreme, to the point of placing himself in an amount of agony. His gestures and remarks to their niece confirmed that he held a deep attachment for her and that they shared a certain closeness that was more that just friendship. The man's gallantry was evident and yet they knew it was not without some audacity that he proceeded with his ministrations.
Darcy was lost to all else but Elizabeth's well being. He repeatedly found himself drawing back from a natural urge to quietly stroke her hair or kiss the top of her head. He knew his actions to be somewhat daring and he could only hope that the Gardiners would view it as chivalrous rather than disrespectful.
The protective and responsible side of Mrs. Gardiner emerged and, as heart warming as it was to observe the gentleman clear partiality for Elizabeth, she now stepped in. "I believe Mr. Darcy that Lizzy has experienced some degree of shock from this business. It might be best if we were to take her home," she said looking towards her husband for his acquiesce.
Mr. Gardiner was still considering what had been disclosed by Mr. Darcy's actions towards Elizabeth. Whatever else might happen tonight, he wasn't leaving until they had a talk.
Mr. Darcy's attention returned to Elizabeth and they observed that he succeeded in getting her to nod her head in agreement to some suggestion he made. Mr. Darcy then announced, "I have offered the use of a room for Miss Bennet to rest. She has agreed to let me call for my physician. Perhaps we could let her retire while we wait and talk of the business at hand?" he offered. "I do not think it would be best for her to go anywhere just now. She is happy to rest upstairs where she can recover. Does this meet with your approval sir?" he asked Mr. Gardiner.
Neither Mr. Gardiner nor his wife could find any fault with this proposal.
They observed Mr. Darcy address Elizabeth and within his deep voice was the gentlest of tones. "Would you like to rest upstairs for a while now Elizabeth?" Not only had he again addressed her by her Christian name, he had quite smoothly taken over in matters concerning their niece's needs. While he had petitioned for their consent, it almost seemed as if Mr. Darcy would carry on whether he received it or not.
There was a very slight nod of her head and he was pleased to hear a faint, "Thank you Fitzwilliam."
Darcy continued, "Elizabeth, I'll be back in a moment." He quickly took charge of the situation and summoned staff to prepare a room. When he returned two maids who were to assist the ladies with whatever they might require trailed along behind him. Darcy would not permit anyone else to help Elizabeth upstairs; he insisted upon doing it himself. Had they been alone, he might have swept her up in his arms and carried her. As it was he placed his arm around her and supported her weight as she walked at a careful pace up a grand staircase to the second floor. Mrs. Gardiner was hovering at her other side, prepared to offer further assistance should her niece require it.
Elizabeth could scarcely believe that she was now being taken upstairs to a bedroom in Mr. Darcy's house. Yet, as unlikely as it seemed, she could not find the strength to object nor the will to argue about it. With the strong arm of Mr. Darcy around her and her aunt on the other side, she walked slowly, still shaking, up the stairs. She was thankful to see that she was led to a room very close to the top of the stairs for she believed herself in some threat of collapsing if she did not lie down soon.
When they reached the door, Darcy instructed the maids, "One of you will stay with Miss Bennet at all times when Mrs. Gardiner returns downstairs. I want to be called immediately if there is anything that is required." He grudgingly released Elizabeth, bowed to Mrs. Gardiner and disappeared the way they came.
As the maid turned down the bed, Mrs. Gardiner wrapped her arm around Lizzy to steady her. Then, with their help, her boots were removed and she was assisted under the covers, fully clothed and with the cashmere rug still around her. One of the maids brought a carafe of water and some glasses to the nightstand and then disappeared through the dressing room door.
Mrs. Gardiner smiled said, "My dear, it would do you best to close you eyes and rest. You have been greatly shocked by these events." Elizabeth tried to give her aunt a smile but she could not quite form one.
"Since you find yourself somewhat speechless, perhaps now would be a good time to make an observation." Her eyes were twinkling and she spoke in a lowered voice to avoid being overheard. "I am greatly impressed by Mr. Darcy and his actions towards you Lizzy. He cares for you deeply and desires to please you. I suspect there is nothing he would not do for you! There is no doubt that he is a man severely in love. I believe that he could make you a very happy woman." Her eyes narrowed somewhat although the sparkle in them remained. "I also believe that there has been some progress in your relationship with him than you have kept to yourself. I am pleased that you have discovered your feelings for him, but you must be mindful of the consequences of indiscreet behaviour. I know you are a intelligent young woman and will act accordingly."
While Elizabeth was being seen to upstairs, Mr. Darcy swiftly penned a note to his physician and had it dispatched immediately. Then it was left to the two men to endure an uncomfortable silence that lead to an awkward exchange.
Mr. Darcy began with, "Mr. Gardiner, sir, I---" but then he looked to the gentleman and knew not how to smoothly broach the subject. This was coupled with a case of nerves that had unexpectedly appeared.
Mr. Gardiner was compelled to try. "Mr. Darcy, sir, I believe that ... there ... is ... something---" he sputtered.
"Mr. Gardiner," he tried again, gesturing with the wine decanter. As he refilled his guest's glass and gained some seconds to regroup his thoughts, he began again hesitantly, acting against all his instincts to guard his privacy. "Sir, you may have noticed some degree of familiarity that exchanged between your niece and I."
Any unrealistic hope that it might have slipped by Mr. Gardiner was dashed when he saw the look on the gentleman's face. "Indeed Mr. Darcy, that was quite clear. As was your genuine concern for her well-being." Mr. Darcy tipped his head in deference to the observation. "However, unless I am mistaken, you have come to no understanding with Elizabeth and as such your actions could be deemed as improper. Perhaps you might correct me if I am wrong about your relationship."
"No sir, you are quite correct. But may I say, in confidence and in my defence," at with these words Mr. Gardiner nodded an agreement of secrecy, "that the only obstacle that has prevented me from securing your niece's affections and coming to an agreement is this business with Wickham. I have earnestly wished to speak to her about this matter but felt the timing was most inappropriate."
"I fully understand your logic, sir; there is no need to defend yourself to me. But if you feel the way you profess, which is worse? To proceed under less than ideal circumstances or to jeopardize Elizabeth's character by impulsive displays that, if I may be so bold, are acted upon first and thought about afterwards?"
"You are correct again. I greatly admire and respect Miss Bennet and I have no wish to put her reputation at risk. My actions were possibly careless in that regard. But my intent was genuine sir. I was, and am, worried about her." He looked earnestly towards the doorway that Elizabeth had left through as he rubbed his fist against the grim expression upon his mouth. When he again took up the conversation his voice was full of frank sentiment. "Sir, be not concerned that any actions like those you witnessed tonight would be repeated at any time in public. I would not normally consider such informal relations at all but that my concern for her superseded my better judgment. My intentions are nothing but honourable."
Would he not consider repeating such relations with Elizabeth? As Darcy he spoke, he felt the paradox between his admission to Mr. Gardiner and his actions. The night he had shared with Elizabeth at the gentleman's home was thrust into the forefront of his thoughts. They had been in much the same predicament on that evening; Elizabeth had been highly upset and he had reached out and comforted her. He believed Mr. Gardiner would view the events of that night even more severely than those he witnessed today. And yet, nothing could be more truthful when he said his intentions were honourable.
Mr. Gardiner smiled into his glass to see the great man squirming uncomfortably before him. It was not his desire to make Mr. Darcy uncomfortable; he only wanted to ascertain if the perceptions that he and his wife held were true. But I see no reason why the man should not contemplate his actions towards Lizzy. It can only serve to remind him of her vulnerability. And along with it put some caution into his relationship with her. "That, sir, was never in doubt. I'm certain I speak for Elizabeth's father as well as the caring uncle I am when I say that, for everyone's sake, it would be opportune to see this settled sooner rather than later." He observed Mr. Darcy for signs of assent.
"Indeed it was my intent to attend to these matters tomorrow, immediately following the ceremony. However, now it seems that my plans must once again be put aside until Wickham is found and made to honour his agreement."
"Mr. Darcy, sir, surely you must realize there is only so much you can do. You have long surpassed any responsibility that you might have held in this matter. I can see no reason for you to inconvenience yourself any further."
Mr. Darcy smiled ruefully and confided to Mr. Gardiner, "Were I able to feel that way sir, I would drop the matter now. But, it simply is not the case. I will hold myself personally responsible for finding the man and, if necessary, dragging him to the church by the scruff of his neck. Only then will I be freed of the duty I so strongly own."
Chapter 13
One of the maids returned with a damp cloth and Mrs. Gardiner placed it upon Elizabeth's forehead. As she sat with her she noticed that her eyes had closed and soon after her shaking had stopped. Her breathing was deep and regular; Mrs. Gardiner assumed she had fallen asleep. With whispered assurances from the maids, she left to return downstairs.
What passed between Mr. Gardiner and Darcy was a gentlemen's agreement and was respected as confidential; they spoke no more of it when Mrs. Gardiner was once again in their company. Wickham and his flight became the source of their discussion. It was a disjointed conversation; there were many points to ponder and in reality, little that could be done. Opinions of where he might have gone and by what means were greatly bandied about. Scotland and Ireland were considered. Darcy was of the opinion that he would flee the country entirely now, especially if he had somehow been able to secure much of the money that had been put forward to help him. So then the Continent and even America were suggested. When the matter of money came up Darcy was thankful Elizabeth was not in the room. He was not of a mind to have her understand just how all the financial arrangements had been sorted out.
In the end it was decided that Mr. Darcy would write to the regiment to see what had become of the commission that had been purchased for Wickham. Perhaps more significant, he would make a trip to the docks in the morning. While his focus would be on the passenger ships to see what could be learned of any passenger lists of ships that had sailed in the last two days, he would go armed with Mr. Gardiner's name to use as an introduction when he explored the possibility of freighters, for they could not be ignored as a mode of transportation for a fleeing man.
To Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner was left the task of revealing the news to Lydia.
In the midst of their discussion, they were interrupted by the announcement of the doctor's arrival. Elizabeth's condition was explained and Mrs. Gardiner accompanied him upstairs to conduct his examination. Once again, Mr. Gardiner and Mr. Darcy were left alone.
A substantial silence that graced the room. The thoughts of the gentlemen migrated not to the most recent conversation about George Wickham, but to the prior one regarding Darcy and Elizabeth. However, at some point Mr. Gardiner's thoughts strayed even further back, for when the quiet interval was broken, Mr. Gardiner's reflections took a turn that Darcy did not anticipate.
"Pray sir, there has been something on my mind for a good while. I would hope that you might be of some service in putting my curiosity to rest."
"Indeed, I will do whatever I can."
"Did I not see you in the lane at Lambton when our carriage was quitting that fair village?"
Mr. Darcy hesitated only for a split second before he nodded. "In fact it had been my intent to call upon Miss Bennet that very morning. I witnessed your departure." He reply was tactful and discreet.
Mr. Gardiner wasted no time in making a point. "Mr. Darcy, my niece is a very bright, intelligent young woman. Surely, I need not tell you that!" Her suitor shifted his gaze down to his glass, uncertain of what it was that Mr. Gardiner was pursuing with the direction of the conversation. "She is level headed and sensible. Most importantly, she has an equable personality and is not prone to emotional reactions. May I assume that you witnessed her unwell state as we departed that morning?" Darcy nodded in concurrence. "I can only conclude that the source of all of this," and here they exchanged looks expressing their shared loathing for a certain gentleman, "initially touched something inside her and now, as it looks again to be unresolved to the satisfaction of her family, especially her sister Lydia, she has let it overcome her normal disposition and taken it much too close to heart."
Mr. Gardiner hoped that Mr. Darcy already shared an insight into the points he touched upon regarding his niece. He suspected as much; he believed the reticent nature of the gentleman was simply the surface of an intelligent man who had the resources to make sound judgments on his own accord. In any event, his point had been made; an uncle had done his duty and spoken in support of his beloved niece.
Mrs. Gardiner preceded the doctor into the study and there began a discussion of Elizabeth's condition. His examination had uncovered no physical symptoms to imply any malady. Darcy's physician was under the impression her affliction was a temporary condition, one that would resolve itself with rest. It was recommended that the young lady be left to sleep undisturbed and that she avoid those matters that had set off her distress.
With this advice he bid those concerned adieu to hurry off a few streets away where a pair of twin boys, it was suspected, had come down with the measles.
With the diagnosis of Darcy's physician quite clear, he offered what was only appropriate for Elizabeth's best interest. "If Mr. Gardiner and yourself, as her guardians while she is here in London, would permit Miss Bennet to stay here overnight, I am of the opinion that it would be best to follow my physician's advice. She would be best served left undisturbed." Elizabeth's well-being was foremost on his mind.
Mr. Gardiner hesitated and cautiously looked to his wife.
She was thinking, "Would it due to allow Lizzy to remain overnight in the home of a gentleman who was so hopelessly in love with her?"
While he was thinking "Is it proper and will there be any risk for Elizabeth?"
It only took another appraisal of Mr. Darcy's face to conclude that he was as worried for Elizabeth as they were. There was no doubt his motives were sincere and they realised that to even entertain notions concerning her welfare were unwarranted.
If the distressed expression Mr. Darcy wore wasn't enough, Mrs. Gardiner need only remember her words a short while ago to her niece:
"I am greatly impressed by Mr. Darcy and his actions towards you Lizzy. He cares for you deeply and desires to please you. I suspect there is nothing he would not do for you! There is no doubt that he is a man severely in love. I believe that he could make you a very happy woman."
Indeed, she believed that Mr. Darcy would in no way abuse the trust they might place in him by allowing Lizzy to rest there until the morning. She made her approval known and when Mr. Gardiner agreed as well, they received assurances from him as to the safety and care their niece all the way through the hallways, across the foyer and down the steps of the townhouse entrance until they were secured in their carriage.
Once they were on their way home, Mrs. Gardiner made her thoughts known to her husband, "I am not mistaken my dear or has Mr. Darcy formed a certain attachment to Lizzy? What say you?"
"Do you think so my dear?" his eyes twinkled merrily concealing knowledge had been disclosed to him alone. Mr. Gardiner relished the unusual position he was in; rarely was he privy to intelligence unknown by his wife.
"Husband, the poor man is beside himself with a violent love for her. I only hope they can come to some resolution soon." She smiled and patted his hand.
"Perhaps they will then," he said mysteriously. "But what of Lizzy? Has she spoken of her feelings towards the gentleman?" he fished.
"Well, if I am not mistaken my dear, I believe that Lizzy may have formed a certain attachment to Mr. Darcy."
A satisfied grin spread across Mr. Gardiner's face. He knew now his niece was destined to a happy life with a good man. "You know my dear, Mr. Darcy is an astute man," he replied to his wife with a pat of her leg.
"In what way? Because he appreciates the excellence of our niece?"
"Well, that too I suppose, but I was actually thinking, he has volunteered to do the easier of the tasks that must be done. He searches for Wickham while we talk to Lydia!"
As the young lady began to stir, the maid remaining in the chamber quickly went to the bedside. She watched carefully until her eyes fluttered open. A reassuring smile greeted Elizabeth. "So, how are we feeling now ma'am? Much better I hope."
It was through a fuzzy head that Elizabeth recalled where she was, and then she inwardly winced. She was most displeased with herself. To have fallen so ill in front of Fitzwilliam, and in his home, was a dreadful business.
Elizabeth pushed herself up so she was sitting upright. The cashmere rug was crumpled under her and she pulled it free. She looked at little out of sorts and the maid offered some water. "Don't get too busy there so quick now, just sit 'til you get your wits back."
This was sound advice. She laid her head back down, closed her eyes and actually dozed off for a moment or two before opening them again and asking, "What time is it?"
The maid went to a long dresser against the wall and looked at a timepiece. "It is just after ten o'clock!"
This news stirred Elizabeth to action. My heavens, I must get myself together for my aunt and uncle will need to return home. She swung her legs over the side of the bed and stopped as she felt the room sway back and forth. Quickly the maid came to assist her and she implored, "Please, you must help me get downstairs."
Mr. Darcy was still working in his study, for he had been coming up to the room quite regularly every twenty minutes to check on the young lady. Each time he softly knocked on the door, the maid would open it a crack, observe his worried face and assure him that the young lady was resting peacefully. "She is sleeping very soundly. She has not stirred a bit." The maid found his obvious partiality for this young woman most endearing.
Addressing the young lady she said, "Very well ma'am but you must take it slowly. And, if you don't mind me suggesting, perhaps we should take you into the dressing room and help you freshen up." Lizzy thought this was an excellent idea as she could only imagine what she must look like; the other maid appeared and the trio proceeded to the adjoining room.
Elizabeth descended the stairs very slowly with the maids hovering next to her. Her head had cleared and it was her aim to allow her aunt and uncle to get back to Gracechurch Street. Standing alone at the doorway to Fitzwilliam's study, she saw him sitting at his desk, head down in deep concentration, with papers scattered about. He was in the process of writing in a ledger and did not notice her. He knew not he was being observed.
This was another side to the man that she had never before witnessed. She found the scene before her captivating. Her aunt's words about the responsibilities he held and his maturity came to her at this moment.
Belatedly, she scanned the room for more people. Where are my aunt and uncle?
Mr. Darcy had been going through correspondence and attending to matters that he had left for too long. He had delayed some pressing business and he had been of a mind to attend to it tonight. It only served to remind him that his presence was required at Pemberley for there was business there that had been set aside when he departed for Netherfield. It was not a thought he welcomed.
He suddenly felt compelled to look up and was caught by surprise to see Elizabeth in the doorway. He jumped up quickly; pushing his chair back so hard it very nearly tipped over. Striding rapidly over to her side, he took her arm protectively and addressed her.
"Elizabeth, what are you doing down here? My Lord, you should not be up." She was gently but firmly led over to one of the sofas. When she had been seated to his satisfaction, Mr. Darcy stood before her, looking at her, and scolded her, "You should be resting. Are you of a mind to repeat what happened this afternoon? I knew you to have more sense than this." But his voice was not too stern as he could never really be angry with her.
"Please, where are my aunt and uncle?" Elizabeth found it strange not to see them.
"Miss Bennet," he addressed her as such only for the benefit of the maids, who were just outside the doorway, "they returned home hours ago. It was under my physician's advisement that you rest undisturbed until the morning." Then he looked at her in mock disapproval, "And now see what you have done? You have disrupted the plan."
He could not help but smile at her and he caught sight of one of the maids close by and had her approach. "Miss Bennet will require some tea and something to eat."
Turning to Elizabeth, he asked, "What would you like? It matters not, I will have the cook prepare whatever you wish."
"Oh no! Do not go to such a bother for me. I would like the tea, thank you. But, I am not really hungry."
"Nonsense, you must eat or you will only fall ill again." He then turned to the maid and said, "See what the cook can arrange. Some meats and bread perhaps. Are there still have the strawberries from Pemberley? Tell the cook I want a plate of fruit as well. And bring Miss Bennet her tea immediately." The maid curtsied and quickly set about her task.
Mr. Darcy then sat next to Elizabeth and looked at her closely. "I am afraid you have me quite worried by your turn this afternoon. How do you feel now?"
As he searched her face tenderly his arm found its way to rest behind her, draped causally on the back of the couch. His fingers, brushing against the fabric along her shoulder, were distracting in the extreme and Elizabeth found herself envisioning what it would feel like were they to venture slightly higher onto her bare skin.
"I am well now, thank you. I am sorry to have caused everyone this inconvenience. And I fail to understand why I would have reacted as I did." She wanted him to understand; she felt foolish about the entire episode. "I am not one to allow my emotions to overcome me in this way."
He did not believe that she was fully recovered but he addressed instead what was causing her present angst. "Indeed, but you have not just had one afternoon of anxiety; it has been many days, even weeks, of this trouble. I think you reached your limit this afternoon." Then he told her truthfully what he had already known but was reminded of by her uncle, "I know you are not one of those young ladies prone to swooning and fainting!" Then she was blessed with one of his striking smiles and she could not help but relax even now with his hand more firmly on her shoulder.
The maid then returned with a tray of tea things and Mr. Darcy relieved her of it to assist Elizabeth himself and insure their privacy.
While he was preparing her tea, Mr. Darcy thought about the determination he had to propose again to Elizabeth. Asking her tomorrow, now with all that had happened, will not be possible. There would be no time for them alone. Even time together was highly unlikely. These thoughts nearly crushed him. He did not realise that his irritation showed upon his face.
But Elizabeth immediately saw his look change. She was uneasy, for she thought that she might be the cause of some irritation. To be sure she was, but not for the reasons she suspected.
"Fitzwilliam," she said to him, "this must be your private study." When he acknowledged it was, she continued, "It is a comfortable room. There is a certain atmosphere to it that is very pleasing. I find that it suits you well."
"I spend a great deal of time here. Very few people of my acquaintance have actually been in this room. Georgiana and my cousin of course, your future brother in law Bingley and now you." She held that he was making a point here and was flattered.
"You forget my aunt and uncle," she reminded him.
"Ah yes, Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner also," he handed her tea and sat back to watch her. Perhaps I will ask her now! What a thought! Lord, he did not know if was prepared. But he wondered as to her emotional state. She seemed fine, but what if she accepted, only to discover later she was somewhat deluded and had answered against her wishes. Under such circumstances one ought not proceed.
Elizabeth saw upon his face the strangest of looks. She recognised it, for she had seen it upon him before. She was about to remark as to his health when the maid returned with a tray bearing more food than Elizabeth could eat in a week. Mr. Darcy thanked her, and requested that she remain in the kitchen until summoned, as Miss Bennet would need help returning upstairs when she was tired.
Once again they were alone. Mr. Darcy would not allow Elizabeth to help herself. He prepared everything she desired and even held the plate for her until she reminded him she was not an invalid.
As she ate, he once more deliberated about asking her now. The moment might not be better. He need only gather his thoughts, for he had been rehearsing for tomorrow, and plunge forward with it.
Unfortunately, another doubt crept into his mind. She might not be emotionally upset any longer, but what about her physical health? She was still pale and seemed drained. Perhaps she would agree to his offer and realise later he had caught her in a state of unwellness and found she was revolted by her answer. His mouth became dry and his skin clammy upon these deliberations. He again was unclear about how to proceed. Such possibilities make the matter something of a dilemma.
Watching Fitzwilliam, Elizabeth noticed again the strange look upon his face. Obviously, something was on his mind, quite possibly his work that she had interrupted. He suddenly stood up and began to pace around the room. By George, he is an excellent pacer!
"I am afraid I have disturbed your work, Fitzwilliam, for that I apologise. If you would like to resume, I will gladly retire."
But this produced a degree of agitation from him. "No, Elizabeth, certainly not! I could not think of another way to pass the time more agreeably," admitting rather sheepishly, "I receive some satisfaction in however little I may be able to help you."
He cleared away her plate and cup, for she had all she wanted, and called for them to be removed. As the maid left with the tray, he closed the doors, secluding them away from prying eyes.
Fitzwilliam again settled next to her. She looked quite fragile sitting there and his instinct to protect her surfaced once more. He put his arm around her shoulder again but this time drew her close as there was no chance of their being disturbed. He felt her sigh and then relax. "When you want to retire, you need only tell me and I will call fort the maid."
"I am quite content here with you Fitzwilliam."
She bestowed upon him a look filled with warmth. Her eyes were shining at him with what could only be described as open affection.
"Those words are sweet music indeed; I am glad to hear it. Perhaps you would be more comfortable to rest against me." He leaned back into the corner of the sofa and waited for her to follow his example.
She studied him openly; this was the first time such an offer had ever been made to her. It was an extremely intimate proposition. She looked around uneasily. But when her gaze returned to Fitzwilliam she saw only an expectant look of tenderness. It was an inviting prospect to let him comfort her with his embrace. When he stretched his arms out, beckoning her to come to him, she could find no reason nor will to resist.
Elizabeth reclined effortlessly against his chest. She contemplated the feel of his body and concluded it was marvellous. As she tucked into him more snugly his hand slipped down and draped along her waist, rising and falling with her rhythmic breathing. His other hand reached for hers and he tentatively played with her fingers.
Darcy enjoyed this to no small degree and he understood his contentment to be great. He judged himself a fool if he did not take this opportunity before him to secure the woman he loved. He nervously began to gather his words together.
Elizabeth was becoming very tired again. When Fitzwilliam had embraced her, she welcomed his soothing touch and she submitted to him gratefully. She wanted to fully appreciate the setting she currently found herself in, savour it and let it continue as long as possible, but her eyes were so heavy. They would not cooperate and began to droop.
She did understand an unusual undercurrent running through Fitzwilliam. He is in an strange mood tonight. And the way he suddenly began pacing around the room. It reminded her so very much of something. She hoped it would come to her. Maybe tomorrow, she thought sleepily.
Darcy took a deep breath and committed himself to action. But then he stopped short, for Elizabeth had moved her hand to his chest and burrowed closer to him. Stray fingers found their way inside his vest, slipping into the seam where it buttoned. What's this? I can only take this as an encouraging sign of her true affection. Her head rested on his shoulder and he could see the thick dark lashes of her closed eyes. The full implication of their closeness momentarily distracted his purpose while other thoughts gallivanted through his mind.
Allowing them to play out with some gratification, he wasted no more time with guarded hesitations; Darcy hastened himself into action.
"Elizabeth, you have made me very happy with the time we have spent together these last weeks. I believe you have enjoyed it as well." He paused, for he was unsure he was pleased with this discourse. He regrouped his thoughts.
Elizabeth was drifting off very slowly. How nice to hear that Fitzwilliam took as much pleasure in their time together as she did. She was still thinking though about the look on his face.
And the pacing. The pacing. She had a revelation as she fell asleep.
Pacing, pacing, pacing. Hunsford!
Darcy had now decided on the direct approach. "Elizabeth, you overwhelm me. I am lost when I am not with you. I cannot imagine my life without you in it. It is not possible for me to describe how deeply I love you. Please, dearest Elizabeth, will you be my wife?" And then he held his breath while he waited for her reply.
But, eventually, he had to release it when still he had no reply. He ventured to look down at her and say, "Elizabeth, can you not answer me?"
Still no response came from her and he then knew what had happened. All his courage and attempts at eloquence had been wasted for his sweet Elizabeth had fallen asleep before she could hear it.
Oh Lord! He was inclined to be exasperated but it melted away as he gazed down upon her. The poor woman has suffered through more than she could bear. He reluctantly acknowledged that it was best she did sleep again, regardless of the untimely manner in which his proposal had been thwarted. But, instead of calling for help to have her taken upstairs, he settled lower on the sofa and allowed her to recline even further into him. I am no fool. This opportunity will not be interrupted. Darcy had every hope that there would be nights like this between them for the rest of their lives. Still, with her hand unsecured, he had no way of knowing it to be the case.
If this be the only night in my life that I might hold her close, by God, I will have my night.
Chapter 14
Darcy was dozing. There was a weight upon his body that was hindering his movement. As he emerged from his slumber he was engulfed by sensations of warmth and tranquility the likes of which he had not experienced before. One fact was evident; a feminine body was draped around him, agreeably resting upon him.
This met with his complete approval.
He was extremely comfortable and couldn't bear the thought of opening his eyes. The spell would be broken and action would have to be taken once he allowed himself to fully wake up. As long as he kept his eyes closed he reckoned the moment might last forever.
Indeed I have had my night and it has served a purpose. It has only confirmed that I can never live happily without Elizabeth. I must have her as mine, to love and care for as my wife and the mother of my children.
He was prepared to wake her at that moment and ask for her hand. Darcy was also concerned that, were she to say yes, he would lose all control. He could feel down in the depths of him a weakness that only needed an excuse to surface. Laying here as they were, he judged this might well be the situation that could do it. In the end, they would have no choice but to make haste to Gretna Green.
That will never do.
It was at this moment that Darcy reined in his highly intuitive feelings that were aroused by Elizabeth sleeping against him; he pulled himself together. The responsibility he felt for her overtook what he deemed his own selfish interests. The promise he gave to the Gardiners was fresh in his mind. They had his word.
Oh why can I not be a dishonourable man?
Darcy was committed to do what he must. He would free himself from her embrace and let her rest until morning in peace. Safe from his deep love and the physical longings it produced. There would be no risk to her from spending the night in his home. Elizabeth would be safe.
As he took inventory of the situation on the sofa his heart began to pound. Darcy immediately questioned his judgment when he ascertained the full implications of their repose. I might not ought to have had my night. Elizabeth was no longer simply tucked into his side with his arm around her. Were things that innocent he would breath easy.
In fact the woman had managed to curl herself around him in the manner of an exotic snake. A leg was flung over his and her foot linked around his ankle. Most of her torso rested upon his, with one of her arms in a space behind him while the other was up to the elbow under his vest, which had somehow become partially unbuttoned. She was much more dangerous than a poisonous reptile. Indeed, she could be deadly in this situation.
If it was within his power to keep Elizabeth from knowing they had lain like this he felt it might be in his best interest. She may not view this in a light-hearted way. And keeping their intimacy from the servants would best serve them both. Thank God they dare not to enter a room where I have shut the door.
With these goals in mind he tried to come up with some way of getting off of the sofa without waking her. Once that was achieved, he wanted to settle Elizabeth comfortably in bed and freshen up in his rooms.
It is best to advance one step at a time.
He couldn't reach his pocket watch so he craned his neck up to read the clock on his desk. With the room still partially lit he could make out the face
4:20!!! Good Lord! It will be dawn soon and the household will be up and about.
Darcy was not prone to panic although if ever there was a time to go to pieces he suspected this was it. However, he forced himself to deal with this in a calm and rational manner.
Slow and easy man.
He tested the depth of her sleep by shifting slightly away from her. She did not appear to rouse but it had the opposite effect he had hoped for; Elizabeth pursued him to remain close. Her arms tightened around him in an effort to keep him next to her. Darcy could not but smile at this. Ah, the pleasure of such intimacy between a man and a woman is now known to Elizabeth. She seeks it out even though she sleeps. His confidence in their relationship grew with her cuddling and as his imagination began to go to work, Darcy paused to reflect with some satisfaction on the images that flashed before him. Suddenly, the south of Scotland didn't seem so unappealing.
Unfortunately, it is out of the question.
This situation had to be resolved now. He bent his head down and placed a kiss on her head. He began to play with the strands of her hair that fallen loose and spread across his chest as he decided how to proceed.
First things first. Disentangle.
He quickly found that, if he was to keep from waking her, this was much more difficult that it might seem. With considerable dexterity he extracted her arm from underneath his vest and in doing so immediately felt a void. He sighed, knowing there was nothing else to be done. As soon as he set it along her side it came gravitating right back to his chest.
Right, Let us approach this another way.
Using her hold on him to his advantage, he rolled them both ever so carefully to position them side-by-side. Darcy perceived a much better chance of success in disengaging himself from this position. She now had an arm trapped under him and, lifting his weight up off the sofa, she moaned simultaneously as he removed it. But still she did not wake.
Well done Darcy. Carry on!
Inching back away from her body he suddenly faced resistance. He could move no further away from her. Looking down between them he saw the source of the problem. The loop of a ribbon in Elizabeth's dress had twisted round a button on his vest effectively binding them together. Deftly, he unwound the offending ornamentation until he was free.
Now he slid back in an unhurried pace to put more distance between them. As he reached the edge of the sofa the smoothness of the leather rapidly increased his progress and, before he knew it, Darcy had slid over the side and landed flat on his back. The floor was heavily carpeted and there was only a muffled thud as he landed.
Bloody hell. He bit his lip to hold back a curse.
It became apparent his feet had not followed; they had become entwined within the hem of Elizabeth's skirt and slip. Silent thanks were sent up to the ancestors from whom he had inherited his long legs. He was able to liberate his feet, still in their boots, with a series of stealth movements that before tonight he might not have thought possible to execute while lying prone on his back.
And through it all Elizabeth lay with her cheek resting against the palm of her hand, sound asleep.
I need a brandy. As Darcy stood up he wiped his damp brow with his handkerchief and stole across the room. He had his drink and contemplated his options from here. But he wasted little time for he knew he must make haste.
Elizabeth woke up slightly confused as to her surroundings. She found that she was once again in the bedchamber where she had rested previously. There was sunlight coming through a gap in the draperies. She decided she felt much better and rose to stretch; as she did she looked down in confusion for she was no longer in her dress, she now wore a nightdress.
She recalled what she believed to be a dream for surely nothing in life could be so wonderful.
Elizabeth had been cradled in Fitzwilliam's arms, sleeping contentedly. At some point his voice floated down to her and he told her to wrap her arms around his neck. His words had been filled with gentle affection and she did as he requested. Then she felt him lift her effortlessly and she was safely in his arms as they walked up the stairs. Her eyes remained closed but as she rested her head against his shoulder, she sensed him hold her even closer although she was in no danger of falling. Too soon the softness of the bed was underneath her. His embrace did not break off immediately and she felt herself drift asleep in his arms as he softly nuzzled her ear.
She did not recall how she got into the nightdress and with some trepidation began to go through her dream again to see if any answers came to her. She could recall nothing in that regard. Other thoughts came readily into her head though, including Hunsford and Mr. Darcy's first proposal. Very strange!
Soon one of the maids from last night cautiously peeked into the bedchamber and upon seeing the young woman awake, entered and offered to assist her with her morning toilette. During the course of her bath, Elizabeth discovered that it was the maid who had helped her to change. After she put on her dress, which was freshly pressed, and was having her hair arranged there was a knock upon the door with word that Miss Darcy and Miss Annesley were waiting for her in the dining room.
Georgiana and Miss Annesley both fretted over Elizabeth when she appeared, for Darcy had informed them of her sudden illness yesterday. When pressed by the ladies for details, Elizabeth was guarded with her explanations; it would not due to mention Wickham.
As she accepted tea Elizabeth could not help but sneak frequent glances to the doorway at the possibility of seeing Fitzwilliam enter. Each time a servant was spotted, her heart sank. Having no knowledge of the plans made the previous evening, she could not know that he would not appear. At that moment he had reached the Thames and was making his way along the waterway in the hope of gaining information about Wickham.
With her second cup of tea finished, she was about to inquire about returning to Gracechurch Street. Before she could raise this subject to her hosts, Mrs. Gardiner was announced. As she has not made the acquaintance of Mr. Darcy's sister some introductions were made. Mrs. Gardiner had to refuse the hospitality that was offered and gathered up Elizabeth to accompany her back home. It was with some reluctance that Elizabeth made her farewells to Georgiana.
Immediately when they were in the carriage, Mrs. Gardiner studied Elizabeth to ascertain if she had recovered. Feeling somewhat satisfied with her inspection, her aunt thus began to enlighten her to all that had occurred when they had returned home the previous evening.
She began, of course, with the events that unfolded when Lydia was told of Wickham's disappearance.
Lydia did not gather that anything was amiss when confronted with the facts from the day. Upon the particulars being repeated and expanded upon, she still did not fully grasp the significance of all that had passed. She was of the opinion that Mr. Wickham would never leave her and that, in fact, he must have made other lodging arrangements for the last two days. She would not accept any conclusions that had been drawn by others, and became quite irritated with her relations when they tried to press the point with her. She fully expected him to arrive at the church at the appointed hour. To that end, Mr. Gardiner had agreed to be at the church in case Mr. Wickham did turn up. Lydia claimed that it would be a disgrace if she were not at the church, but her aunt and uncle would hear none of her arguments. It would not due to have Lydia dressed in her wedding gown, waiting at the church, with no groom to meet her.
The Gardiners had also wisely determined that they would wait to send any news to Longbourn about what had occurred, until they were one hundred percent certain that Wickham had indeed fled.
So it was that they had to hurry back to Gracechurch Street, as time for the ceremony was drawing near, and Mr. Gardiner wanted the carriage to take him to the church.
When Elizabeth and Mrs. Gardiner entered the house, a departing Mr. Gardiner quickly greeted them. Before he left, his eyes glanced towards the stairs and then he raised them to the heavens. But, he smiled at his wife and even managed to give her a kiss before he left.
Immediately, they saw what he referred to. For Lydia had dressed herself in her full wedding outfit and was coming down the stairs with a look of some displeasure on her face.
"There you are! A fine thing you holding us up this morning Lizzy. After all, we will have some trouble today as it is, for my uncle will have to come all the way back here to fetch us for the ceremony when he discovers Wickham at the church. Your visit to Mr. Darcy's house could have made us late." She paused only to get her breath. "I dare say, you seem to have made a rather permanent guest of yourself. Staying the night? What will Mama and Papa say to that I wonder? Hmmm!" One of Lydia's bug-eyed looks crossed her face.
Elizabeth rubbed her fingers across her forehead and willed herself to remain silent. She knew it would be but a short time before her sister would have to face the truth about Mr. Wickham and she felt that was going to be cruel enough without any harsh words from her. They are hardly necessary at this point.
But Mrs. Gardiner would not tolerate her outburst and proceeded to remind the girl of her sister's illness. Lydia merely listened in silence with a look of disbelief upon her face.
Mr. Darcy had left his townhouse early that morning. Before he left, he could not help but sneak a look into the room where Elizabeth was sleeping. He only got a quick glimpse at her form resting under the covers, for the maid quickly came to assure him that she was well.
He had accepted the irony of his aborted proposal and had vowed he would speak to Elizabeth again to ask for her hand. Regardless of the outcome of today's events, he was determined to find an opportunity before the sun set on another day.
A smile played upon his lips at the recollection of last evening.
So desperately did he desire to be near Elizabeth, he had been unable to let her retire. When finally he did take her upstairs he had held her close while he carried her to bed. He found he was unable to break off the embrace immediately. His hand caught a bit of her hair that rested against her cheek. Between his fingers it felt like velvet. In her slumber he studied her closely; his face was so near to hers that they were almost touching. Her dark lashes were so long and thick that they came to rest on the top of her cheeks, now glowing and flushed from her sleep. She looked very tranquil as she rested. Before he rose to leave, he placed his lips next to her ear spoke words to her that would caress her heart if she had but heard them. "Sleep well sweet Elizabeth. I will declare my love to you again and on that day I will never let you go." Then he felt the warmth of her cheek as his lips lightly kissed her good morning. Then he had left to get the maid to see to her needs.
He was jarred out of his recollections when the carriage abruptly stopped. Darcy had reached his destination: the Port of London. He had crossed the Thames and was on the south side of the river. From where he sat he had a view across the water. The London Bridge was to his left and the Tower was far down and on his right. He was facing the West India Import Docks with their huge warehouses and wet docks that extended a half a mile along the north side the river. It was this side of the Thames where he would concentrate, in the Pool of London, a stretch of river below the bridge that was crammed with hundreds of lighters, barges and hoys, colliers and finally, great ocean-going ships moored in the deepest waters.
It was a daunting task. The wharves of the riverfront stretched for some miles down to the Isle of Dogs, and there were ships moored in the waterway all down the river. The activity was frantic with people coming and going, for the Port of London was immense by any standards and it was a sight that both native and foreign visitors most wished to see.
Suddenly, Darcy spied a group of boys, none of whom could be more than twelve years old, loitering off to one side. He astutely reasoned that these youngsters would know their way around the docks and get further faster than he would, so he struck a bargain with the gang. After giving a thorough description of Wickham, he offered payment to any boy who could find a trace of the man having either been around the docks or departed on a ship over the last two days. He agreed to meet them again in the afternoon.
Deciding not to leave any possibility unexplored, he directed the driver to cross back to the north side of the river and he then spent the next few hours questioning anyone he could engage at the West India Docks, for the rogue Wickham could have hopped a trade ship departing for the East.
Mr. Gardiner stood out in the warm sunshine. It had turned into a fine late summer day. He looked at his pocket watch for the tenth time and decided he had waited long enough. It was nearly three-quarters of an hour past the time the ceremony had been scheduled. Time enough for Wickham to have arrived if he had intended to. Now it was left for him to return back to Gracechurch Street with this news.
Elizabeth had changed her clothes and sat with her aunt while Lydia walked from room to room. She was unable to sit still. She glanced frequently at the windows facing the road and hurried to look outside whenever she heard a carriage pass by. As each one brought no Mr. Wickham to her, she grew a little less bright and cheery. A look of some worry had begun to creep upon her face.
Finally, Mr. Gardiner's carriage did pull up to the house and all the ladies rushed to the windows. They could see quite clearly that Mr. Gardiner was alone. With this, Lydia turned and ran up the stairs whereby they heard a door slam.
When he entered, Elizabeth's uncle confirmed that which they already knew to be the truth; Mr. Wickham had fled.
He was a rogue who, under the pretext of eloping, had stolen away with Lydia and lived with her as husband and wife. He was an underhanded sneak who made an agreement with the family to marry her. He was a ne'er-do-well who had run from his duty, probably a richer man for his trouble.
He was the worst of men.
Elizabeth excused herself to go up to Lydia. She knocked on the door and when she heard no answer, she opened it ever so slightly.
"Lydia, please, may I come in?" She did not wait for her reply. Lydia was out of her dress and changing into the clothes she had laid out to wear for the trip to Longbourn after the wedding. She looked up miserably at her sister. She spoke not a word but broke down in tears. Elizabeth guided her to the bed and let her have a good long cry without saying a word.
When she had calmed down, Lydia announced, "I want to go home, Lizzy, today, now, in the coach that we have hired. You will come with me, won't you? Please, Lizzy?" She stared pleadingly at her.
Her sister did not want to deny her this request. Yet the idea of leaving London now was most disheartening to Elizabeth. She found that she desperately wanted to see more of Fitzwilliam. To leave now would not even afford her the opportunity to say goodbye. Her heart was beginning to feel as if it was slowly being ripped out and she quickly excused herself on the pretext of discussing the situation with Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner.
Elizabeth fled to her own room where she sat for a good while and recited all the reasons why it was best that she go with Lydia. She knew her own regrets about leaving London would have to be put aside. As she went to speak with her aunt and uncle she reasoned that she was quite like a sacrificial lamb. She returned to the Gardiners who, upon hearing Lydia's request, agreed that perhaps it would be the best course of action.
But neither aunt nor uncle for a moment forgot about what had developed between Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy. Mrs. Gardiner offered to help her pack her trunks and when they were alone, she spoke to her niece.
"How do you feel about leaving London just now Lizzy?" she began gently. "I had come to believe that perhaps you had settled upon your feelings in certain matters." She smiled furtively at her.
Elizabeth projected the appearance of outward calm and seemed to be unaffected. Her words, however, revealed her true feelings. "I sincerely desire to stay Aunt. I am most clear about my regard for Mr. Darcy." She turned away from her aunt to place some garments in her trunk but continued, "I have come to know him quite well these weeks and I recognise that he has gone to great lengths to change what I criticised about him." Her aunt heard the reasoning of a mature young woman as Elizabeth spoke. "But, there is more. Mr. Darcy is a man very different from what I believed him to be. Regardless of the attention he paid to my remarks, had the excellent qualities not always been within him, he could not have shown me who he really was. I judged him unfairly. My prejudices were equal to his."
For a brief moment, Elizabeth let all the heartache she felt overtake her features; she told her aunt with some force, "I was so very wrong about him." Then she regained control of herself and locked her emotions away.
"Lizzy, we can talk to Lydia and see about you staying for a while longer if you wish."
After a long silence her aunt heard her hushed reply. "I think Lydia should go home."
So it was that not more than an hour later Elizabeth and Lydia were settled in the coach. Their trunks had been loaded onto the back and their goodbyes had been said. The driver pulled away and they moved quickly along the street. It was not too long before Elizabeth noticed the turn to take to go to Fitzwilliam's townhouse. But the coach went on past that street and too soon it had disappeared from her view.
The road to Longbourn was longer than either could ever remember experiencing. It was littered with regrets and dashed hopes. The ruts and potholes along the highway could be avoided no less than the emotional pain they contemplated. The carriage bounced relentlessly over the hurt they suffered.
Each was lost to understand just where their lives were headed from this point.
Chapter 15
Darcy had spent a good many hours searching the West India Docks and had found not a trace of Mr. Wickham's movements. The time was growing late so he thought it best to proceed back to the other side of the river where, he acknowledged, his best chances for success lay. When his carriage slowed it was rushed upon by the eager boys. As Darcy got out, they all started shouting to him at once.
"Whoa, hold on! It is impossible for me to understand you. I shall take you one at a time," and he pointed his walking stick to the left for the farthest child to begin, listening with care to each of their stories and interjecting a question now and then. While several did speak of men that could have been Mr. Wickham, each story had a futile end. Just when he believed he had heard from all the boys, the smallest child of the group was pushed forward, for he had been overlooked in the excitement. Darcy kindly looked down upon him and asked to hear what he had learned.
The boy was quite frightened, for never before had he been in the presence of such a gentleman. He spoke solemnly as his dirty face peered up to Darcy. But what the boy had to say immediately caught his attention. As the other children were dispatched with a farthing each, given by the driver, Darcy was led a short way to the river by the small boy. There, the boy pointed excitedly to a large passenger ship."
There was much activity here; Darcy concluded the ship was preparing to depart soon. Along the dock were stacked any assortment of crates and barrels full of every kind of provision necessary for a lengthy ocean voyage. They were being ferried over to the ship in a continuous stream. Darcy found that he had stopped next to several crates of squawking chickens and immediately moved away.
He watched the child approach a dockworker, pulling on his sleeve to gain his attention. The man was in fact a sailor on the ship and was led back to Darcy. After repeating what he knew and answering some specific questions, the tale he wove confirmed to Darcy that he should next speak to the captain of the ship, who was identified as one of the men seated in a small vessel currently crossing the river. Darcy once more showed his gratitude by reaching into his pocket and procuring a coin. A gapped-toothed smile was returned in appreciation as the coin disappeared into the sailor's pocket with some speed.
When the boat reached the dock, Darcy saw that the captain had the careworn face of a man who had spent his life out in the elements. He imagined him to have battled gales and endured arctic temperatures as well as the tropical heat of the South Seas. He appeared to be in something of a rush when Darcy stepped forward and blocked his path. "Excuse me, sir. Might I have a minute of your time, please?" And with that, the two men entered into a conversation that enlightened and satisfied Darcy immensely. Certain facts were made known to the captain, who readily agreed to help the well-spoken gentleman before him.
His business for the day finished, Darcy turned towards his carriage but paused as he spied the small boy standing off to the side. Motioning for the boy to come to him, he reached into his pocket. The only coins he had left were of a much greater value than was necessary to give to the child, but so pleased was he with this turn of luck that he placed a sixpence in his palm. The child's mouth flew open with surprise at his benefactor's largesse; he glanced up briefly while closing his hand tightly around the coin and running off to disappear amongst the crates, barrels and wagons in search of his friends.
As his carriage pulled away Darcy leaned back into the comfortable seat. He knew the ship that Wickham had booked passage on was to sail with the tide the next day, but it was highly unlikely that Wickham would now be on it.
The Bennets had been anticipating the arrival of Mr. and Mrs. Wickham for the entire afternoon. Mrs. Bennet was in a high state of anxiety and her family found it impossible to share the same room with her and difficult to even be within the confines of the same house. Mr. Bennet was fortunate to have his study to use as a retreat, but for his daughters there was no such escape. Jane, Mary and Kitty all sat and listened to her ramblings. Jane, with some astuteness, had wisely advised Mr. Bingley not to call Longbourn today.
When the afternoon had worn on to the point that the light was about to fade and they thought they might never receive the happy couple, the crunch of wheels rolling upon gravel was heard. The approach of the carriage was confirmed and everyone rushed from the house to stand expectantly in the drive. Lydia's profile was visible from the window but she had not turned to greet them with her usual exuberance. A man set a step for them to climb down and Lydia was first out to be greeted warmly by her mother, who in her excitement, failed to notice the downcast mood of her daughter.
Ignorant of the new misfortune that had befallen their family, she scurried up to Lydia and cried, "Oh, there she is! And how beautiful you are, Mrs. Wickham!" She smiled to her other daughters to show her approval and then gave her youngest daughter a big hug. "But where is my son-in-law? I must give him my congratulations." She began to look past Lydia to locate her husband, as had all the other Bennets.
By now Jane had spotted Elizabeth alone in the carriage. She spoke for everyone when she asked simply, "But where is Mr. Wickham?"
Kitty and Mary peeked inside and saw that the carriage was indeed empty, save for their sister; no other had travelled with them.
Mr. Bennet displayed a look of annoyance with the entire affair and replied, "Indeed, Jane, I do believe that is the question of the day."
All eyes turned toward Lydia, who burst into tears and fled inside the house. This left Elizabeth alone to face the family with the explanation they all awaited.
Watching all of this from the interior of the carriage made Elizabeth wish vainly she might stay in the compartment indefinitely. She was greatly tempted to instruct the driver to just keep going, preferably all the way back to London. With a powerful reluctance she climbed out and looked around at her family. Their faces wore an assortment of emotions: confusion; disbelief; worry and wonder.
She had received no welcome at all from any them for it was not she they had expected. Everyone stood waiting for another to begin when Mrs. Bennet turned to her daughter and allowed her emotions to spill over. "Lizzy, Lizzy! What has happened? Where is Mr. Wickham?" her mother trilled. "Oh, Lord, I fear the worst. Where is Mr. Wickham?" And as she attempted to gain some relief by fanning herself with her hankie, she began to whimper.
"Mrs. Bennet," her husband said rather sharply. "Please! Let us go inside." He wanted no scenes acted out in front of the servants that might be repeated with loose tongues. He continued to his daughter, "Lizzy, am I correct in assuming that Mr. Wickham has not travelled with you today?" When he saw her nod her head he told her, "Very well, perhaps you would like to come into the study." Mr. Bennet took his wife, who was now sobbing quite openly, by the arm and led her into the house as he felt certain she was about to collapse onto the drive. Jane quickly went to Elizabeth's side, while Mary and Kitty joined Lydia upstairs.
"Lizzy, please tell me the worst has not happened." Jane appealed to her.
"Oh Jane," came her rushed whisper, "it is true! Lydia and Mr. Wickham are not married, for he disappeared two days ago." They had reached the study door and Elizabeth gave Jane a rather pained look before she repaired to the room to face her parents.
"Close the door, please," her father instructed as she entered his sanctuary. Her mother was sitting over in the corner, sobbing rather sedately. "Now, Lizzy, sit down." Without further delay he instructed her, "Please tell your Mother and I exactly what has happened and leave out no details."
"I have a letter here from Uncle Gardiner, if you would like to read it." She pulled the sealed correspondence out of her pocket and passed it to him.
"Thank you, I will read it later, but now I would like to hear from you."
Looking across his desk, she studied her father's tired features. It was with a heavy heart that she broke the news. "Well, father," she began with a deep breath and thus unfolded all the details of the last days, from Mr. Wickham's last visit to Gracechurch Street to her concerns which then led to the discovery of his disappearance up to and including his absence at the church today. She was left to tell her tale uninterrupted although Mrs. Bennet would let loose with intermittent wails, varying their pitch higher and lower, softer and louder, depending on which particularly dreadful part was revealed. Sensibly, Elizabeth chose to leave out of her narrative the part about her taking ill and falling asleep in Fitzwilliam's arms as they lay together on his sofa.
"So, the unthinkable has happened. Mr. Wickham has tipped his hand and it is now certain he never had designs to marry Lydia."
Mrs. Bennet did not try to contain her emotions. From her corner she lamented over the fate of her daughter, meted out liberal invectives against the fugitive Wickham, and complained of her own mistreatment and suffering throughout this ordeal.
First addressing his wife, Mr. Bennet declared, "Mrs. Bennet, I daresay your babbling is nothing but useless racket. Quiet Madam!" She looked a bit like a naughty child, but her husband's admonishment had the desired effect; it did quiet her down somewhat.
"Lizzy," he turned his attention to his daughter, "there are three things I wish to put to you, and you may answer them in any particular order. Firstly, what is being done now to find Mr. Wickham? Secondly, why was I not informed when his disappearance was exposed? And, finally, how has Mr. Darcy come to be involved in this matter?"
"Papa," she looked to her father for some moments as she formed answers to his first two questions. "I believe that my aunt and uncle did not want to give you the occasion for any further grief should Mr. Wickham have appeared at the church today. There was some small chance that he might have been there."
Before Elizabeth could continue, her mother interrupted. "Oh, I knew we should have never allowed Edward to handle this. Look what has become of it all. Mr. Wickham has gone. Lydia is not married. Our family is disgraced. But who will find him now? And fight him to make him marry her? Whatever shall we do?" She returned to her wailing.
"Mrs. Bennet!" her husband scolded her again, "I am afraid that you will have to leave if you cannot contain yourself."
Elizabeth turned to see her mother hiccupping as she tried to calm down. As she returned her gaze to her father, she saw him looking expectantly at her to continue. She was slightly embarrassed with her next admission.
"I am sorry to tell you that I am not certain what is being done now to find Mr. Wickham. I know that my aunt and uncle discussed this with Mr. Darcy but I know not what plans had been formulated. When the news was broken to Lydia that Mr. Wickham had failed to arrive at the church, she insisted on leaving for Longbourn immediately. I admit in my rush to pack I neglected to inquire," she finished lamely.
Offering up no further narrative, she waited in silence for a response from him. Her father peered over the top of his spectacles at her with a stern look upon his face. Elizabeth was unsure if any of his displeasure was directed at her.
"And...?" he prodded as if he held a large stick.
"And...?" She was quite sure of his meaning but had held out some hope he might have forgot the last point he had raised. She was trying to avoid the topic of Fitzwilliam with her parents.
"Mr. Darcy, Lizzy."
"Oh, Mr. Darcy." She blushed somewhat as his name escaped from her lips and averted her eyes to avoid her father's scrutiny. "Well, um, I am unsure of this also. Although, from Jane's letter, I know that Mr. Darcy was here at Longbourn the day Mr. Collins called. According to Jane, Mr. Collins was quite zealous in relating the events about Lydia to Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy. Perhaps we should call for Jane to explain."
She began to rise when her father told her, "Stay where you are. That will not be necessary." Mr. Bennet offered up suggestion. "Perhaps some speculation on your part will produce a theory for us."
"Oh well, maybe Mr. Darcy felt he had some knowledge about Mr. Wickham that would assist in locating him."
"I fail to see why Mr. Darcy should inconvenience himself in our family business, Lizzy," Mr. Bennet said. "Do you?"
"Papa, he grew up with Mr. Wickham. Perhaps he felt some sort of, oh, responsibility for the man's actions," Lizzy suggested.
Doubt spread across Mr. Bennet's face at this idea. He arched his eyebrows and inclined his head towards her. He looked as if he was waiting for her to carry on.
Lizzy sat across from her father, looking at him before admitting, "Papa, it was actually Mr. Darcy who located Mr. Wickham and Lydia in London."
"Mr. Darcy!" her mother shouted from over in her corner. "Is this true, Lizzy? That horrible man was responsible for locating my daughter?" Mrs. Bennet came over to where Lizzy sat and glared down at her.
Once again a rosy hue flourished across Elizabeth's face; this time she was unable to hide it. She could barely manage to reply with a simple, "Yes," to her mother's question. Elizabeth was reluctant to discuss Fitzwilliam with her parents, she believed her feelings for the man would be easily read were they to enter into a discussion of his character; she knew that this was neither the time nor the place for any such discovery.
"I find this entire situation unacceptable!" continued Mrs. Bennet, who seemed to lose any appreciation she might have with her role in the current matter, which was none. The part she had played for the previous sixteen years was never examined; her extreme deficiency in recognising her own ill-judged indulgence of her daughter was a point never raised in her own conscience. "And I agree with your father. I see no reason why that terrible man, so full of pride, should have any concern for our family's trouble." Mrs. Bennet was fanning again. This time the hankie was aimed at her bosom.
"Mrs. Bennet, I have not slandered the man. I am simply at a loss to see why he would make our business his." He was staring quite frankly at Elizabeth now.
"You need not voice what we already know. Mr. Darcy is an awful, arrogant man."
Caught up in the moment, Elizabeth rose from her chair, compelled to defend the man she loved. She blurted out, "Fitzwilliam is not a terrible man. Why he took the best care of me when I was ill." She abruptly shut her mouth when she realized what she said and sank back into her seat. Her colour grew a deeper shade of red that matched the roses on her mother's favourite bush.
Elizabeth believed that there had never been a silence as heavy as that in her father's study at this moment. Her mother's eyes were glazed over; her fanning had been abandoned entirely as she now swayed back and forth in the manner of one who might faint.
"Mrs. Bennet, please return to your corner before you collapse. I would hate to have the floorboards damaged." With the spell broken, she once again focused on Elizabeth but before she could speak, her husband said, "I for one would be most interested to hear you expand upon your last statement Lizzy. Proceed."
She watched her mother return to her seat and, with a squeak as she settled down, she dared a glance at her father. He was sitting back in his chair, fingers of both hands resting against each other and a direct gaze levelled at her.
Resting upstairs, resting upstairs, UPSTAIRS! Elizabeth was petrified she might say something that would be less than well received by her parents. And his name is Mr. Darcy, Mr. Darcy!
"With all that happened yesterday," she paused, considering that it had only been but one day ago, "I allowed the strain of events to get the better of me. We had returned to Mr. Darcy's home to discuss what action might be taken when I became so ill it was necessary for me to be taken to room upstairs. Aunt Gardiner sat with me and later Mr. Darcy's own physician came and examined me. At his recommendation, I was left to rest there until the morning."
Mr. Bennet looked to be absorbed in her story; his faced showed not disapproval but something that bordered on amusement. "And pray, Elizabeth, you are well now?" His voice lacked a serious degree of concern.
"Thank you, yes I am."
"I would hope that the amenities of Mr. Darcy's home met with your approval?"
"Certainly, sir."
"And, as you stated, Mr. Darcy behaved most suitably and saw to whatever you required in your recovery?
"Indeed he did." She looked up then and seemed to not see her parents but to look past them, perhaps all the way to London, as she spoke with some emotion, "He is a decent and honourable man who has done us a great kindness in helping with Mr. Wickham."
Elizabeth was unexpectedly touched by the sadness she carried with her from quitting London prematurely. She reached in her pocket for her handkerchief and dabbed at her eyes. She then spoke to her parents in a very subdued voice. They had to strain to hear, for she was looking down into her lap. "He is the very best of men." Elizabeth then begged to be excused and left the study.
Mr. Bennet responded dryly, "Well, it certainly looks as if more has happened in London than we anticipated."
Darcy wasted no time reaching Gracechurch Street. When he discovered that Mr. Gardiner was at his warehouses he decided to hasten there without delay to speak with him. He was quite impressed with Mr. Gardiner's business, for it was a vast enterprise. Were the circumstances for his visit anything other than the distasteful affair at hand, he would have requested a tour of the facilities.
He put to Mr. Gardiner what he had learned during the day and they once again discussed how best to proceed. It was during this conversation that Mr. Darcy learned that which gave him considerable pain; Elizabeth had returned to Longbourn with her sister. He did his best to hide his disappointment, although he succeeded poorly. It was clear he was crestfallen, although he made a valiant attempt to hide it. Mr. Gardiner made no comment, although he felt deeply for the young man. They agreed upon a course of action and Darcy bade Mr. Gardiner farewell.
That night, Elizabeth and Jane had a long, sisterly talk that allowed both young women to catch up on all that had happened over these many weeks, for letters can only convey so much. Both had missed these talks; Elizabeth found that the hours passed with Jane, sharing confidences and secrets, did much to restore her natural spirit. She cautiously kept some particulars about Fitzwilliam to herself, although Jane was left in no doubt about her sister's changed partiality for Mr. Bingley's best friend.
The young ladies talked until the early hours of the morning and had only just extinguished their candles when there was a loud knock upon the door. The entire household was roused, finding at the front door an express from London.
As Mary held a candle close, Mr. Bennet opened it; many pairs of eyes were upon him, anticipating news they were sure would be about a certain missing fiancé. As Mrs. Bennet held her dear child close, Mr. Bennet looked upon her and announced, "Lydia, it looks as if you will be returning to London tomorrow to attend your wedding. And this time, I will be travelling with you."