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Chapter 16

Posted on Friday, 1 November 2002

It was with pleasure, Darcy thought, that Mrs. Younge herself opened the door after his loud knock. Once again, she seemed fearful and uncertain. This insecurity he would do nothing to abate.

"Come in, sir."

"Thank you, Mrs. Younge."

Mrs. Younge seated herself as a signal to Mr. Darcy to sit down. She did not speak. She would not be prevailed upon to begin this conversation.

"Will you tell me where Mr. Wickham is?"

"Why should I?"

"You mentioned that he is in the company of a young lady. That young woman's family has not seen her for several weeks. She disappeared with Mr. Wickham, unwed, in the night, with no forwarding address; she has eloped with him. Her note to her favorite sister indicated they were to go to Gretna Green to be married. As you well know, they are here. She has not written to her family to announce any marriage. It is imperative that you allow me to see Mr. Wickham that I may endeavor to correct this situation."

"Why you, Mr. Darcy?"

"The family is in mourning for the loss of another of this young woman's sisters to serious illness six months ago. They have not the means nor ability to locate Mr. Wickham and bring about an honorable end to this elopement. I have taken their troubles upon me, as a friend of the family. You must see the injustice of this circumstance. You must help me remedy this situation and allow me to be of use to the young woman and her family."

"I do not trust you," she said hesitantly. She was actually beginning to believe him, but could not so easily let go the means of getting money from him.

"How can I persuade you?"

"How will I know you will not hurt him?"

"I suppose there is no way for you to know that, unless you want to accompany me on my visits to him, and see the girl for yourself." Darcy tried to imagine himself allowing this to happen, and could not.

"No, I do not want that." She was letting him get away. She had to be more direct. "You know, the cost of maintaining such an establishment as this is quite a burden, on occasion, when improvements need to be made."

"Oh, and are you planning any improvements?" The conversation was finally going in a direction that he could do something about.

"Yes, a room or two could use some new furniture. And some pictures, for the walls. Little things make a room so much more pleasant." She felt dirty, but she would get something, that was for sure.

"Well, Mrs. Younge, perhaps when I come back this afternoon, you could have Mr. Wickham's directions for me and I could be prepared to make a contribution to assist in your improvements. Do we have a bargain?"

"Yes, Mr. Darcy, we do."

Dinner that evening was at the Gardiner's in Gracechurch street. As Darcy, Bingley, Elizabeth and Georgiana drove through the London streets, Darcy was able to explain his business of the day.

"Well, I do have some good news. While I was out this afternoon, I called on Mrs. Younge for a third time, having seen her last night, and again this morning. She has provided me with Mr. Wickham's directions here in London. His lodgings are located on the other side of London." He had been addressing himself to Elizabeth. "After breakfast tomorrow, when it is not too early, Bingley and I will ride over in the carriage and call on Wickham and try to see your sister. We have not discussed this, Miss Bennet, but what would you like me to do? I had always imagined that he should marry her. Is that your wish?"

"I ... I had not..." what could she say? She had assumed that Mr. Darcy knew what had to be done. "I cannot imagine my sister having a great deal of happiness in her life attached to that man, but the impact to Kitty and Lydia will be ruinous if he is not made to marry her."

"And what of yourself, Miss Bennet?" asked Darcy.

"I do not care to think of myself, sir."

"I am sorry, Miss Bennet, I did not mean to distress you. I..."

She reached out and brushed his arm with her fingertips. "No, you did not! I mean, I am not distressed, about that. I believe they should marry, sir. There is nothing else to be done."

"With your permission, I will consult with your uncle tonight, after dinner."

"Yes, please, Mr. Darcy. Georgiana and I saw my aunt yesterday, and anticipated your desire to speak with him." Her lip quivered. "Mr. Darcy, you cannot imagine the shame and embarrassment I suffer knowing what mortification you bear on behalf of my family. It is beyond anything. I cannot thank you too much, and cannot express to you my heartfelt gratitude in such a way as to communicate what I feel when I consider all that you have done and yet will do before this miserable business is concluded. My family can never repay this debt to you.

"Miss Bennet, I pray you, please let you be the only member of your family that knows of my assistance and be assured that my thoughts are only for your happiness, and that such is the only satisfaction I require for my troubles, if they can be called such." He hoped he had not said too much. He did not want her gratitude, but her love, and he did not want to trifle with her. It was a risk he was forced to take, however. She deserved to be here, on the spot, in the hunt for her sister, rather than remaining at Pemberley, wondering what was happening, not understanding his absence. Maybe he should have left her, until he was certain of the outcome, but he was selfish, too. He could not be away from her. There was no doubt he could make Wickham's life with Miss Lydia very much more agreeable than life without her. All he could hope for was that Mrs. Younge had not lied to him, and that there was a small shred of decency left in Wickham.

Mrs. Gardiner's hospitality was comfortable and pleasant for the small party. She had kept her children up to meet their cousin and her three friends. The children had acted shy and darling, as small children of tender ages ought to, and they were particularly pleased with Mr. Darcy who found room on the small sofa for all five of them: himself and the four little Gardiners. Somewhere out from under the laughter could be heard Darcy's low growls and grunts that seemed to stir up even more screams of delight. Georgiana, standing next to Bingley, was happy to see her brother let his guard down with these little children. She rarely saw him behave so freely. Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner were quite pleased with their children, as all proud parents should be.

Elizabeth was filled with many emotions, most of which were shocking to her. She had never considered herself a lover of children beyond the affections she felt for her young cousins. But here, seeing Mr. Darcy, a man she had openly avowed to herself that she loved, playing with these small children, created in her heart such feelings of longing for a child, his child, in her own arms, that for a moment she was forced to look away to avoid a tear that threatened to break out of one eye. She had to admit to herself that she felt jealousy. She wanted Darcy to put off propriety and decorum and hold her in his arms and say things to her that would make them laugh with delight. If she could, for just a few minutes, she wanted to have the pain and anger of the past six months lifted from her body, and spend that time with Darcy. She never loved him more than she did right now.

The lightness of the moment with the children passed, and with dinner came the politics of dinner small talk - what to say and not to say while everyone became acquainted. The Gardiners wanted to talk to Elizabeth about Mr. Bingley, and she wanted to talk them about Jane. Darcy, however, wanted to begin about Lydia, and Bingley would have been grateful to hear the Gardiner's feelings for Jane, but he would not approach the subject for the world with Georgiana present; and she was pleased to be anywhere with her friends, and hoped that the Gardiner's would like her and remembered her embarrassment from yesterday morning when she said a little more than she should have about her brother's feelings for Elizabeth. She noticed Bingley's discomfort and wondered at it, but then recalled that Elizabeth told her that she and Jane used to come to visit the Gardiners frequently, and maybe he was uncomfortable because of that. Thinking about Jane caused Georgiana to remember the death of her father. You never get over it. All you could do was decide how you are going to change from it.

After dinner, the ladies separated to the drawing room. Mr. Gardiner helped the gentlemen to port and decided to start the conversation. "Mr. Darcy, I understand that you have come to town with the intent of searching for my missing niece, is this correct, sir?"

"Yes, it is."

"And what does Elizabeth say to this?" Mr. Gardiner wanted to get an idea regarding this young man's feelings for his other niece. She had been a long time under his protection, and as things stood, would be for quite some time to come. It was no good to have her some place where she was not respected and appreciated. Mrs. Gardiner was fairly certain that some kind of attachment was forming between the two of them.

"She has suggested that if I can find Wickham and Lydia, that I report this information to her father and then do no more."

"Do more? Do you not feel that any efforts on your behalf are officious, to say the least?"

"I am not concerned with what Mr. Bennet's opinions of me might be. His treatment of Miss Bennet leaves me with no patience for him or his family. I proceed solely interested in Miss Bennet's well-being and happiness," said Darcy, his tone of voice reflecting his impatience.

"I am sorry, Mr. Gardiner," finished Darcy.

"No, do not be. I cannot account for Mr. Bennet's tolerance for this treatment of Elizabeth, and frankly, I have very little patience with it, either. As they are all of them my family, I must have a little more understanding to avoid a complete rift with what remains of them."

"I understand, sir, I would act similarly, if in your place."

"Mr. Darcy, what do you intend to do about Lydia and Mr. Wickham?"

"I have been able to locate Mr. Wickham's directions. In the morning, Bingley and I will go see them. I share Miss Bennet's opinion that the only honorable termination of this elopement is their marriage. It will take more influence and money than Mr. Bennet has at hand. I willingly supply both, but I need you to assume the responsibility for the transactions. I do not want my influence in the family known to them. I do not believe that Mr. Bennet would accept or want my help, yet he must accept it because I cannot bear that this pain be upon Eliz...Miss Bennet any longer than necessary."

"I see. Very well. I do not know how Mr. Bennet would look upon your interference in his affairs. On the other hand, how relevant is that when there is nothing he can do, anyway? After all, you are only looking after the welfare of two of his daughters. One, we need not add, he seems to have done very little for." Mr. Gardiner would allow himself to like Mr. Darcy, for he was obviously in love with Elizabeth, which meant she would be taken care of. Mr. Darcy did not seem to hold too high an opinion of Mr. Bennet, however. Well, why should he? But should Darcy still not ask his consent to marry Elizabeth? Then again, why should he ask Mr. Bennet anything? Elizabeth nearly fled to Mr. Darcy with nowhere else to go. Is not that consent enough? Mr. Darcy would be very welcome to the family, but whether or not Mr. Darcy would welcome anyone beyond Elizabeth remained to be seen.

The next day, Darcy and Bingley left their carriage in front of the lodgings to which Mrs. Younge had directed them. They went inside and asked the landlord for Wickham's room, and were sent upstairs. Darcy knocked on the door, which Wickham answered.

"Darcy, welcome to London."

"Wickham, this is my friend, Mr. Bingley. We have come to see Miss Lydia Bennet."

"Lydia?" Not 'Mrs. Wickham.' That confirmed that they were not married, Darcy thought. Wickham said, "You have just missed Lydia, she has gone out to buy a few things."

Bingley asked, "You sent a lady out unescorted in this part of town?"

"Oh, she is not a lady, Mr. Bingley," replied Wickham with a laugh. "How is your little sister, Darcy? I daresay she liked me very well. We would have made a very happy couple, but she was just too nice, though I suppose I did not quite get the chance to find out how nice. Too bad about the dowry. Did she get over the heartbreak? Thank you for coming. I was counting on it, by the way."

"Be careful, Wickham," Darcy growled.

Bingley could not believe what he had just heard. Never in his life ... How did Darcy just stand there and take such abuse from this man?

"So, Darcy, these Bennet girls can be quite a handful. You have one for yourself now, I hear. Too bad one of them is dead. But that leaves two others. Maybe you would like one, Bingley?"

Most individuals, man or woman, or even Bingley, can absorb a considerable amount of pressure when it is gradually exerted on them, but when it comes upon them all at once, in many cases, just like a dry twig, they will snap.

Several things were happening all at the same time to Mr. Bingley. He was unable to breathe. He was unable to see colors. He had a piercing ache in his head. He lost control over his body. From some point in the air, he watched himself quickly cross the room towards Wickham in huge strides, his fists clenched dry of blood. He saw his arm pull back and suddenly Wickham double over with an expression of discomfort, hobbling backwards. Before Wickham had a chance to stand up again, Bingley saw himself reach out and grab Wickham's head and thrust it downwards on his on knee. And then he stepped back. For just an instant, Wickham hung there, in the air. Then, there was the sound of a body hitting the floor.

Bingley quickly inhaled and staggered back, falling into a chair. Tears were pouring down his face. Every memory of Jane was passing through his mind at that moment, her memory having been irreverently invoked by the mouth of the greatest evil Bingley had ever known. His whole body was shaking.

Darcy was shocked. He had witnessed such things in his days at school, but to see such violence come from Bingley was unthinkable. Not that he disagreed with it. He went to check on Wickham, who, Darcy decided, would wake up stiff but alive. Wickham would undoubtedly be more talkative tomorrow.

Darcy took Bingley the long way home, allowing him time to compose himself before they got there. When they entered the townhouse, Bingley went straight up to his room. Darcy could not blame him. Either Wickham's remarks about Georgiana, Jane, or both obviously upset him. He walked into the drawing room, where Georgiana was sitting alone with her work.

If Darcy's long ride home was an effort to allow Bingley time to recover himself, it had pretty much failed. He was unequal to anybody's attention. If he were to speak, he felt as if his voice would falter, so he said nothing. If Darcy did not ask him questions that could be answered with just a nod of the head, he did not answer him at all. How was he to face Georgiana? He had stood by and listened to Wickham speak very ill of her. Yes, it had angered him, but he had born it with patience, but when Wickham had mentioned, even in reference, Jane Bennet, Bingley had come completely unwound and committed what were, for him, unspeakable acts. Never in his life had he behaved in such a manner. Is this one result of loving a woman? Perhaps it was better to be alone.

He opened his door and hailed a servant to bring him some brandy and water. He had not decided which it would be. Dining on ashes with Jane or dining on hope with Georgiana. Brandy for Jane, water for Georgiana. He should have stayed at Pemberley. He was starting to feel better there, resolved to the past and reconciled to the present and hopeful to a happy future with Georgiana and Darcy. And now Wickham had to ruin his peace of mind. He felt guilt over his behavior towards Wickham. He would have to face him tomorrow. He would never let Darcy near him alone, not after what he himself had done with so little provocation. And guilt over Jane. Yes, he had loved her and he did love her. And guilt over Georgiana. He was beginning to love her. Had Jane never died there would never have been a Georgiana. But Jane did die and he needed to love. Darcy was right. He would always love Jane, but he would love Georgiana, too. All hope for Jane was gone. He had seen Jane placed in her coffin, had seen the lid bolted down, had seen her lowered into her grave and had seen the floor of the chapel rebuilt over her head. All hope was gone. There was not a possibility of mistake.

"Welcome home, brother, where is Mr. Bingley?" Darcy smiled. Georgiana is always thinking about him now. She reminds me of Bingley when ... well, enough of that for today.

"He went up to his room. He was not feeling well. He is perhaps a little overheated." Darcy would never tell her what happened. He would not mention any details of Bingley's involvement with Wickham. Everything in her life was being stained by that man.

"But it is not hot today."

"I am sure he will be fine. I will ask him later if he intends to come down to dinner."

At that moment Elizabeth came in from the library with a book. "Hello, Mr. Darcy."

"Hello, Miss Bennet. We had a brief conversation with Mr. Wickham this afternoon. I am afraid it was not too productive. He asked us to stop by again tomorrow. Unfortunately, Lydia was away or we would have spoken with her as well. I know you are worried about her. If it were at all possible to have seen her, we would have, please believe me."

Elizabeth looked at him with an arched brow. What was he hiding? He sounded like a convicted man. She had not said a word about her sister, and here he was apologizing about not seeing her? She could not very well ask him right in front of his sister, and so she would approach him later, if possible. It would be possible. She had to know.

The servant returned with Bingley's brandy and water. He took a small glass of brandy. 'In memory of Jane,' he said. It would be his last sad memory. From now on, he would only remember her in death as she had lived in life, as a happy woman. He took a small glass of water. 'To the future,' he said. He drank this water slowly, allowing it to purify his body as it coursed down his throat. 'To the future,' he repeated. He stood up, washed his face, straightened his cravat and coat, and went downstairs to Georgiana.

The next morning, Darcy addressed Elizabeth with, "Miss Bennet, you should know that Mr. Wickham had a little accident yesterday. Unfortunately, he made some very disparaging remarks about Jane, my sister and you. Something happened to Bingley, something set him off. Before I knew it, he had laid Wickham out on the floor. Bingley cannot explain his own behavior to himself or to me. If Wickham should make some reference to it today, I do not want you to be surprised."

"Very well, Mr. Darcy. Thank you for telling me. Is Mr. Bingley recovered from this?

"Yes, Miss Bennet. He is doing much better than I imagined. I had anticipated he would not join us for dinner last night, but he came downstairs almost happy."

Bingley joined them in the carriage and they were off across town to Wickham's lodgings. Elizabeth was surprised at the condition of the neighborhood. It did not appear to be a very safe place at all, and she wondered that Wickham would bring Lydia here, until she realized that Wickham did not care at all for Lydia. It brought a tear to her eye. Darcy saw her distress and could only imagine what she was thinking. It was only going to get worse for her.

Chapter 17

Posted on Thursday, 7 November 2002

They arrived. Darcy asked Elizabeth to remain in the carriage until they ascertained that Lydia was home and had separated her from Wickham. Darcy did not want Elizabeth spending any more time in Wickham's company than absolutely necessary. Elizabeth agreed with a silent nod.

Wickham opened the door, but immediately stepped back on seeing whom it was.

"Are not you going to invite us in, Wickham?" asked Darcy.

"Certainly, I suppose," he replied, clearly not wanting either of them in.

Bingley looked around the apartment, seeing more than he had yesterday. It was one room, with a single bed in it, against the right side. Lydia was sitting on it, smiling at him in a coy kind of way, blushing as if she were a new bride. The room was very cluttered with their belongings scattered about. There was a chair by the window on the far side of the room, a desk and chair on the left side. The desk was littered with empty wine bottles. It was not well lit and what light it did have came from cheap candles that were smoking. It was an eerie, uncomfortable room. It was difficult to believe that Lydia would exchange the relative comfort of Longbourn just for this.

"Wickham, Miss Elizabeth Bennet would like some private time with her sister. Would you please join Bingley and I downstairs so that we can continue our conversation there?"

The gentlemen began to move through the door.

"Where are you going, George?" asked Lydia.

"Downstairs to talk to Darcy and Bingley. Please remain here. I believe your sister, Miss Elizabeth, is coming up to visit you."

"Oh, that will be wonderful. How I have longed to see her."

Darcy followed Wickham downstairs, where he had procured a private room. Bingley went out to the carriage and escorted Elizabeth up to Wickham's room and remained outside the door.

"Lydia, what have you done? Do you not realize the pain you are putting your family through? They do not know where you are, if you are well, or if you are coming home, anything!"

"Oh, there is nothing to that. You can tell them everything."

"You know very well that I cannot. Come home, Lydia. Mr. Darcy will take you to Longbourn this very day. We will tell Papa that this whole affair was Mr. Wickham's doing and that you should be forgiven and allowed back into the family."

"There is nothing for me to be forgiven of, Lizzy, for I have done nothing wrong. I love Wickham, and we are going to be married at some time, and until then, it does not signify if we live together a little ahead of time. It is not as if anybody cares about those sort of things these days."

"People care about those sort of things very much, Lydia. You are bringing quite a scandal upon our whole family. You are ruining the marriage prospects for the rest of us, and making life very troublesome for Papa."

"Mr. Darcy will marry you no matter what I do, I own..." Elizabeth could not but help blush at this "...and Mary is too ugly to be married, and Kitty is too jealous of me. Nobody ever thinks about me and what I want."

"And just what do you want, Lydia?"

"To marry Wickham, brush out his red coat every morning, polish his buttons and be happy."

"Do you think someone who takes you away from your family without marrying you first will love and take care of you and truly make you happy?'

"He did not take me away. I left."

"Why?"

"Because he was leaving and I did not want to stay at home. Papa and Mama have done nothing but argue since you went away. I cannot bear the noise. No one cares about what I have to say anymore. Everyone is cross and angry. Even Hill does not attend to me anymore. She just squints at me, tells me to behave and runs off to Mama."

"What do they argue about?" Elizabeth was starting to feel afraid.

"About you. Papa says Mama is being unreasonable in sending you away, that it is not your fault that Jane died. Mama says that it is either you or he must go and then what a scandal will that cause and could he possibly do such a thing to his daughters."

Elizabeth whipped her head around in surprise. "What? She wants him to leave the house?"

"No. Only if he insists that you be allowed to return home. She says she will have none of it."

Elizabeth sat on the bed and leaned against the bedpost. "Oh, Papa," she said quietly.

"What, Lizzy?"

"Um, oh, nothing, Lydia." Elizabeth reflected on her last moments with her father, beating on his chest, screaming at him, then the darkness. "Lydia, how soon would you be willing to marry Mr. Wickham, if it could be arranged?"

"Tomorrow, of course."

"Please come and stay at aunt Gardiner's until the arrangements can be made. This cannot be a comfortable place for you. Please?

"Very well, Lizzy."

"Please pack your things. Mr. Bingley will assist you in taking them downstairs. I will await you in the carriage." With that, she stepped out in the hallway.

"Miss Bennet, you do not look well. Let me call for Darcy and we will take you home."

"I will be well enough. We will be taking my sister to my aunt Gardiner's until a marriage between Mr. Wickham and her can be arranged. If you would be so kind as to assist her with her things, I will await her in the carriage."

"Of course, Miss Bennet. I will escort you down to the carriage."

After Bingley had shut the door on her, she moved to the far side of the coach and leaned her head against the glass.

"Oh Papa." She cried. "Oh Papa." And all efforts to contain her tears quickly failed.

In response to Darcy's first question, Wickham said, "I have no intentions towards her. She is an amusement for me. You know very well I must marry for money, and she has none."

"So what did you intend to do with her?"

"Just leave her when I grew tired of her, which would be soon, as I believe she is growing tiresome. How about your Miss Bennet, Darcy, is she growing tiresome?"

"If you do not want a repeat of yesterday, you had better confine your remarks to Miss Lydia Bennet."

Wickham opened his mouth to make another comment, "Miss Elizabeth is..."

Suddenly, Wickham found himself on the floor, rubbing his eye.

Bingley could not agree more. "Bravo, Darcy!"

"I told you, Wickham, that this conversation does not extend beyond Miss Lydia. I will no longer tolerate your abusive language towards my sister or any of the other Miss Bennets. Sit back up in the chair!"

Wickham pulled himself back into the chair, a humbler Wickham than he was. "What do you want, Darcy?"

"I want you to marry Miss Lydia and put an end to this elopement in an honorable fashion. I want you, for once in your life, to exercise a shred of decency and do the right thing. What is it going to take?"

"Well, Darcy, it will take something you have that I do not."

"Which is?"

"Money."

"How much?"

"My debts sum up to a pretty penny, over £1000 in Meryton, an additional £200 here in London. I certainly will not marry Lydia on her dowry of £50 per annum after her parents die. No, I figure that to marry her I will require at least £7500."

"Wickham, be reasonable!" Bingley shouted.

"I am being reasonable. I do not have the luxury of magnificent wealth and a grand estate like my friend here, something which I deserved to have at least a portion of, and hope yet to get. If he really loves his Miss Bennet and wants to avoid a scandal in her life, he will provide for me."

"Darcy, may I speak to you outside for a moment," asked Bingley.

"Certainly. Please excuse us for a moment, Wickham." They departed the room into the hall, shutting the door behind them.

"Miss Elizabeth has finished her interview with Miss Lydia. She seemed rather upset and has retired to the coach. She did persuade Miss Lydia to remove to her aunt Gardiner's home until a wedding arrangement can be worked out with Wickham. Miss Lydia is gathering her things and I will help her to the carriage when she is ready. I think we should take the ladies home, Darcy."

"Very well, Bingley. Let me have a little more conversation with Wickham. Help Miss Lydia out to the carriage."

Bingley went upstairs and helped Lydia finish her preparations and get loaded in the carriage. Elizabeth heard them coming. She did not want Lydia to see her crying, so she had pulled herself together the best she could.

"Wickham," said Darcy, "I am prepared to spend a certain amount to cover your debts so that you can come out of hiding and marry Miss Lydia. I agree that more money should be settled on her. I am not prepared to turn you into an idle, independent gentleman. You must have a profession. What shall it be? A clergyman? I hardly think you fit for looking after the spiritual needs of other people, let alone yourself. The law? You long ago decided that was not an option for you. The navy? You are too old to enter that respectable field. I see that the only real place for a gentleman like you is in the army. You can no longer stay with Colonel Forster. So it remains to be seen where. I will contact my cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, about using his influence to obtain a commission for you in a regiment he is connected with in the north. It is a regiment that is part of the regulars, so you will take your chances of being sent abroad should there ever be war on the continent or in America, but it is a place for you, and the regulars have more respect and honor that a commission in the militia, which may hold some attraction for you. What do you say, Wickham?"

"How much money will be settled on Lydia?"

"That we will have to decide another day. I will return tomorrow. Lydia has agreed to remove to her aunt Gardiner's until the wedding between you two. Tomorrow, I will provide you with the directions and tonight will ensure that you have access to their home when you wish to see her. It will take a week or so to get word on your commission in the north. Until that is finalized, your wedding cannot proceed, of course."

"Why are you doing all of this Darcy?"

"Because I am a friend of the Bennet family, and I am trying to be of use to them, that is all. This will all work out for your benefit. Having your debts paid off, marrying Miss Lydia with some money settled on her, a new commission in the north, all of this is to your advantage, so please do not go running off and cause me to have to go looking for you again."

"I will be here, Darcy. I will see you tomorrow."

Darcy went off to the carriage wondering if Wickham would really care that he would not be with Miss Lydia tonight, or if it would really bother him to not have her around him as he had grown used to during the past weeks. Darcy thought that in his own situation, he would find it unendurable to be separated from Elizabeth. He was determined that she would not leave his household until they were married, at which time she would never leave it anyway, a thought which gave him a great deal of comfort.

Lydia talked the entire way to the Gardiners. She spoke of what a great deal of fun she had running off with Wickham, and how excited she was about the wedding. Elizabeth, on the other hand, said not a word, but looked blankly out the window. Darcy was becoming concerned. What had happened in Lydia's room to cause this turmoil in her mind? Surely she was prepared to some degree to see Lydia's situation. She cannot be that surprised. What happened? Bingley did not say much, either. He was disgusted with Lydia and Wickham and would say nothing to her. Darcy tried to play the polite host and humor Lydia the best he could. Fortunately, she did not need attentive listeners. She was content just talking away about her adventures.

The Gardiners were pleased to see Lydia and welcomed her into their home. Elizabeth helped her get settled in upstairs while Mr. Darcy explained the situation to Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner. They were horrified to learn of the conditions in which she and Wickham had been living. Darcy assured them that he would find better lodgings for Wickham once the financial arrangements had been worked out.

Elizabeth was coming down the stairs from Lydia's room when she overheard the following conversation:

"Mr. Darcy, thank you very much for all that you are doing for Lydia. You are really taking too much upon yourself," said Mr. Gardiner.

"No, sir, I am doing whatever is required to ensure Miss Elizabeth's happiness and peace of mind," replied Darcy.

"You must care for her a great deal, then.

"Yes sir, I do, a very great deal."

"She is very lucky to have gained your friendship."

"Thank you. I am very fortunate to have gained hers."

Elizabeth was blushing when she decided to finish her trip down the stairs, fearful of being caught eavesdropping. Lydia was settled in. They could leave now.

Elizabeth walked over to Mr. Darcy, placed a hand on his shoulder, leaned against him and whispered into his ear, "Mr. Darcy, I am not feeling well, could we please return home?" She gently pushed off of him to stand straight again. Mrs. Gardiner noticed this little intimacy with a smile.

"Mrs. Gardiner, I need to return back to my townhouse to finish some business I have been neglecting, and to send an express off to the north to see about a commission for Wickham. If you will please excuse us, we must be off now."

"Yes, of course. Please come again sometime when you can all stay for dinner."

"We would enjoy that very much."

Elizabeth kissed her aunt and uncle goodbye, and they were off.

That evening, Darcy penned a note to his cousin in the North.

London, Friday, May 22nd 1812

My dear cousin,

This note concerns our friend George Wickham. He has once again invaded my life. Do not fear, he has done nothing to Georgiana. My present involvement regards his elopement with a young lady by the name of Lydia Bennet. Her sister, Elizabeth, is currently staying with Georgiana and I during her period of mourning for their late sister. Lydia does not share the sense of her sister and ran off with Wickham several weeks ago. I have found them in London, unmarried, with no intention to marry. To save Miss Elizabeth from further pain of scandal, it is my desire to bring about a marriage as soon as possible, but I need your help. I need to acquire a commission for Mr. Wickham in a regiment in the north, away from his acquaintances here. I will pay the cost, whatever it is. Time is critical. They cannot be married until I have obtained this commission for him.

You may ask why I am doing this for him after his behavior to my family and me. In response to that I can only say, I am not doing it for him, but for Miss Elizabeth.

I will look forward to hearing from you at the earliest possible moment.

Fitzwilliam Darcy

He posted it express and could do nothing now but wait.

On Saturday, Darcy and Bingley went back to talk to Wickham. He greeted them a little more solemnly at the door.

"Hello Darcy, Bingley"

"Good morning, Wickham," said Bingley, while Darcy said nothing at all. He was already doing enough; he did not need to exchange pleasantries as well.

"Wickham, I have sent a note off to my cousin in the north to obtain his assistance in procuring a commission for you in a regiment there. I expect to hear back from him soon, the only delay being that of the express post, which takes time to travel between here and the north.

"Well, thank you, Darcy, I am much obliged. So, I take it then you are going to pay off my debts in Meryton and London, which are about £1200, then purchase the commission for me, which is £200. We will need money for traveling, setting up a dwelling place, new clothes for Lydia and the like, which I would imagine would be another £100. That is £1500. We can ask her father for her cost of bed and board at Longbourn, which is, what do you say, £100 per annum? You can settle another £6000 on her, which at the 4 percent, would be £240 per annum, plus the hundred from her father, would give us £340 per annum to live on, plus my income from the military, which, you know, is not much. That totals £7500, just like I told you yesterday."

"Darcy, that is an incredible sum," said Bingley. "How can you possibly afford that?"

"Oh, the master of Pemberley can afford much more than that, Bingley," said Wickham. "I am being generous. I am only trying to claim what should have been mine all along."

"Why yours?"

"Because I should have had the living. My father did more for Mr. Darcy than what he honored me with in his will. I attended him almost constantly when I was at Pemberley. I deserve more. Now, with Miss Elizabeth tied around his little finger, he has no choice but to comply, or the scandal becomes public, the Bennets become further pained, Lydia is abandoned on the streets, and I walk away laughing."

"You are a monster, Wickham," said Bingley.

"I know, but I hope to be a comfortable monster, and not have to live day to day wondering where my next meal will come from. And I figure that the Darcy's have so much money, they can easily provide that for me."

"What assurances do we have that you will not mistreat Miss Lydia?"

"You have none. I do not love her. She is pretty enough, but she talks too much, like her mother. Perhaps being taken to the north, away from her, humbled by marriage, she will learn to hold her tongue," boasted Wickham. "Unfortunately, you are giving her the money, not me, so I will have to keep her with me, at least."

Poor Lydia. Poor Elizabeth, thought Darcy. There was no chance of happiness for Lydia, and Elizabeth knew it.

"Wickham, this is the last time I will allow you to interfere with my family and those that I love."

"Ah, so you are in love with this Miss Elizabeth are you? All the better for me. Tell me, how shall you prevent my further interference?"

"I shall challenge you to a duel and kill you, regardless of the consequences to myself."

Wickham's blood went cold and drained from his face into his stomach, which immediately started to ache. He had never imaged Darcy would be this angry. He figured he could blackmail Darcy against his emotions at almost anytime. Perhaps it would be best to stay away.

"Wickham, you and I are both very aware that I am more skilled at any weapon you could chose. And it would be my pleasure."

In his mind, Wickham had to agree.

"Wickham, I will not settle £6000 on Lydia, but I will settle £4000 on her, providing you with £160 from her settlement, £100 from her father. After her parents' death you will receive another £50 per annum. That is a total of £310, which is the best you are going to do from me. A total of £5500."

"Very well, Darcy."

"Pack your things. I am moving you to a better lodging place closer to my townhouse. I would imagine that the wedding could occur in about two week's time. I will apply for a license for you. The Gardiners have agreed that you may call on Lydia, but she is not to leave their home. Make sure you are kind and gentle with her and do nothing to offend either her or the Gardiners or you will have no further privilege. Do you have paper and ink?"

"Yes.

"Then before we leave, please address a letter to Colonel Forster resigning your commission in his regiment."

The letter was written, and Darcy posted it after Wickham was moved to his new lodgings.

Chapter 18

Posted on Sunday, 10 November 2002

Elizabeth went early to Georgiana's room and knocked on the door.

"Come in, Lizzy."

"How did you know it was me?" asked Elizabeth.

"Because nobody else comes to visit me in my room at such hours except my maid, and she knocks at my dressing room door."

"Am I disturbing you?"

"Oh, no. I am always very happy to see you, Lizzy."

"Georgie, today is May 26th, the end of my deep mourning. Jane died six months ago today. I have very different feelings."

"Oh, Lizzy!"

"I am fine, Georgie," said Elizabeth thoughtfully, "I am so glad to have known Jane. She was my model as to what was right and good in a person. I am so happy to have been able to be the one to care for her in the last days of her life. I was completely consumed in loving and nursing her. That was one advantage to being at Netherfield - I would never have been allowed to do that at Longbourn."

"Why not?" asked a surprised Georgiana.

"My mother would have required a large majority of my time, since she would have been ill due to Jane's condition, and unable to exert herself. I would have been called on to care for my mother, and Jane would most likely have been left to the care of the housemaids."

"That is awful, Lizzy. Is your mother really like that?"

"Oh, yes. Any time anything happens that is not to Mama's liking, she fancies herself ill or nervous and complains until one will do almost anything to silence her. My father pays her no attention, but hides in his library, and she is left to the care of her daughters. I have tried to be patient, and for Jane's sake I bore it the best I could, but I would have resented Mama's behavior a great deal if I had known that Jane was gravely ill and that I was attending to my mother and not to Jane. Now, after Mama's treatment of me, I wonder why I put up with her at all."

"Because you are a loyal, loving daughter, just as much as Jane ever was. Do not let resentment and anger eat away at the love in your heart."

Elizabeth laughed, "You sound just like Jane."

"Well, Lizzy, then you can trust me, right?"

After dressing, the ladies went down to breakfast, where a buffet had been set out on the sideboard. The gentlemen soon joined them. Darcy looked up at Elizabeth, trying to gauge her feelings, wondering if she would accept the gift that he planned to give her today day. He was fully aware of its significance to her. He knew he was putting himself forward, but he felt deeply on this occasion and wanted to express his feelings. Elizabeth had stepped away to a window for a moment so Darcy took this chance to approach her:

"Miss Bennet, if it is not inconvenient or undesirable to you, would you please visit me in my library during the course of the morning? I have something I would like to give you."

"Mr. Darcy, it shall certainly not be inconvenient or undesirable to visit you on any occasion," replied Elizabeth. She favored him with a shy smile, then brushed past him to her place at table to finish her breakfast. This was indeed a surprise.

Elizabeth and Georgiana went into the drawing room after breakfast to attend to their embroidery. Elizabeth was feeling a little nervous. Just when she should go to him? Should she appear eager or calm, or, she wondered, in love. How could it not be love?

Well, it must be time. Elizabeth excused herself from Georgiana, set down her work, and with the appearance of a decided calm, walked towards the library. Elizabeth decided it was a good decision to be calm but a hard thing to do. Elizabeth had rarely been in the library, his room, but Darcy had asked to see her. He had something to give her. She knocked on the door, gently and with some hesitation.

"Come in, Miss Bennet."

Elizabeth entered the room, shut the door and leaned against it. "You are the second person today who seemed to be able to look through the door and know it was me just by my knock."

"Who was the first?"

"Your sister. I went to her, early this morning. I knocked at her door, and she said the same thing, 'Come in, Miss Bennet.' She said I would be the only one to come to her at that time of day, but that her maid would ..." Elizabeth colored and looked down at her feet, twisting her hands.

"Miss Bennet, please continue."

"I am sorry, sir, I was rambling."

"Not at all. I enjoy hearing whatever it is you might have to say. Indeed, few things can give me greater pleasure." Now it was his turn to blush.

"Thank you, Mr. Darcy."

"Miss Bennet, I want you to know that I am aware that today is the end of your deep mourning for your sister. This has been a difficult six months for you, and the treatment you have received from your family has been unconscionable. I am deeply distressed whenever I think on it. My heart is deeply hurt when I see you in such sorrow. I feel overwhelmed. I do not know what I can do to relieve your suffering, and feel helpless that I cannot. Your happiness and peace of mind has been my primary interest almost since I met you. To be of service to you has been my greatest pleasure. Anything I can do for you, I will do."

Elizabeth was stunned. Such an open avowal of what he felt for her; she had not expected it so soon. Her heart was rejoicing. "Mr. Darcy, thank you, I ..."

"Miss Bennet, please, you need not say anything. Perhaps I have been too forward. Indeed, I could say more." Darcy took a deep breath, exhaling slowly. "I have a gift for you."

To Elizabeth's ears, he might have said 'I love you..."

Darcy went to his desk and brought out a small box, prettily wrapped. He carried it across the room and put it in Elizabeth's hands.

She took it and examined it on all sides, savoring the feeling of having in her hands something that belonged to him. She could still feel the warmth of his hands on the sides of the box where he had held it. She imagined what it would be like if he were to hold her. She walked towards his desk and sat down on a chair in front of it. She saw him join her on a chair next to her seat. She caressed the ribbon and looked at him. He returned her glance with a look that seemed to burn through her. She felt her skin tingling. She looked down at her gift, then back to him again, glancing upwards through her lashes, gently biting her lower lip. She could feel her heart pulsing throughout her body, her breath seemed to be caught in her throat. She gave a loud sigh, giggled, then turned her attention back to her gift. She set the ribbon aside and took off the lid.

If Elizabeth had meant to be surprised, then she could not have been more so. Inside was a small mourning brooch, about an inch long and a half-inch wide. In the center was a rectangle of glass, behind which was a lock of hair. Surrounding this glass, all around it, like a fortress, were faceted stones of jet, like shining black sentinels in the candlelight. On the back of the gold setting, the following words were engraved: In Memory of Jane Bennet 26 Nov 1811. It was beautiful. It was the most beautiful thing Elizabeth ever had seen. And she had received it from Mr. Darcy.

"Mr. Darcy, I do not know what to say. This is a beautiful piece of jewelry. How did you get some of Jane's hair?"

"I was able to acquire some from the jeweler, with the permission of your father, though he seemed impatient with my request, and just wanted me to be gone from his presence, so I do not know if he knew what he agreed to. Do you like it, Miss Bennet? Will you accept it?"

"I love it very much, as I love y..." Elizabeth cleared her throat. "And yes, I will accept it with pleasure. When I look at it, I will remember what you told me, sir and I will remember you, as well as Jane. Thank you very much for thinking of me."

"You are very welcome. I am glad that you like it." He reached over and took her hand. It was so warm. To be held by those hands! She was incredible. Did she know what a treasure she was to him? How could he tell her? He raised her hand to his lips. She was wearing lavender today, as she did nearly everyday. Her skin was soft against his lips, so soft, so gentle, so delicate. The passion she stirred in him. How he wanted to reach out and hold her and protect her from all the pain in her life. She belonged with him, at Pemberley, at the townhouse, or wherever he was. His mind began to wander around the grounds at Pemberley, by the lake. There they were, the two of them, with a picnic basket on a blanket, the cool breeze moving the air, a bird calling from a tree, a mother duck with a small family of ducklings...

"Mr. Darcy..."

He felt Elizabeth pulling her hand out of his grasp.

"I am sorry, I..." He was quite embarrassed. How long had he been daydreaming, holding her hand to his lips?

"Please, do not be sorry, Mr. Darcy. I do not know where you were just now, but thank you."

"You are too kind, Miss Bennet."

She laughed. "It is you who are kind, Mr. Darcy."

Elizabeth felt weak all over. Why did she take her hand away? She could have stayed with him forever. How could she tell him? She set down the box, took up the brooch and pinned it to her gown. She looked at him squarely in the eyes, took one of his hands in both of hers, raised it to her mouth and brushed it lightly with her lips, stood quickly and ran from the room. She stopped in the hall outside the drawing room. She was hot, flushed and confused. She could not let Georgiana see her like this. Elizabeth went to her room for one-half hour to compose herself. Her only hope at composure was not to think of him, and not to think of the last quarter hour with him in his library, not to think of the brooch proudly displayed on her shoulder. And to not think of him was impossible.

On Saturday, Darcy received the following letter from his cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam:

Newcastle, Tuesday, May 26th, 1812

Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy,

I am not certain who you are, but you seem to have the same name as my cousin. But I know my cousin has a profound hatred of George Wickham, so I know it could not be you that is requesting my help in purchasing a commission for Wickham, so you must be someone else who is using his name. That being the case, I intend on traveling to London on my next leave from the regiment and drinking you under the table until I gain a true confession.

A woman, Darcy? Who is Elizabeth Bennet, that she can tame the lion? You, Darcy, fallen in love? I congratulate you, and I will love her for it, though I would much rather face Wickham with pistols than provide him with a commission.

To your satisfaction, General Rothwell is seeking an officer of few talents and no ambition. I have told him that I knew of a man from the Hertfordshire militia that would suit his purposes. Without exerting myself too much, I have convinced the dear General to take on Wickham, and have pledged the £200 for the price of the commission. He will need to report for duty in Newcastle on Monday, June 22nd. I have told the General of his upcoming nuptials, and the General wishes me to offer his compliments to the new Mrs. Wickham, and to assure her that she will find the officer's lodgings very comfortable for ladies such as herself, and hopes that she and her husband will dine with him and Mrs. Rothwell and other of the officers and their wives on the Thursday night after their arrival.

The General is a very complicated man. He will give Wickham something to think about for a long time.

There, I have done my duty to you, the General, Wickham, Miss Lydia Bennet, and I dearly hope to Miss Elizabeth Bennet, as well.

I wish you the best with Miss Elizabeth. She must be a very special woman if she causes you to go to all this effort on behalf of George Wickham.

Yours, &c.

Richard Fitzwilliam

Folding up the letter, Darcy went in search of Elizabeth.

"Miss Bennet, I have been looking for you. I have good news from my cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam."

"Well, I hope I was not too hard to find, sir," Elizabeth teased. "Pray, what sort of good news is it?"

Darcy laughed. "Wickham shall have a commission in General Rothwell's regiment in Newcastle, which is in the north. He is to report there on June 22nd."

Elizabeth colored and looked down, "Sir, I do not know how to thank you again for your kindness to my family. I know that they will never be grateful. I know that Lydia is particularly undeserving and does not realize the great advantage you are providing for her. And I cannot be grateful enough. I am sorry, Mr. Darcy."

"Miss Bennet, this is wonderful news. Monday a week, June 8th, should be the day of the wedding, allowing them full two weeks to get to Newcastle. Perhaps they will be invited to Longbourn." Darcy stopped talking and looked at her until she met his gaze. "Miss Bennet, you must believe me, you must trust me, that everything I do, I do for your happiness. To see you smile is all the thanks I desire." Elizabeth could not help but smile at that. He continued, "There, I am well paid. Thank you." And he turned and went to his library, wondering how the smallest gesture of affection and kindness from her could cause such happiness in his heart.

Elizabeth was all gratitude. She was very mindful of the tragedy facing her family should Lydia's situation become generally known. All chances of a favorable marriage for any of them would be lost forever. Perhaps even Mr. Collins would break his engagement with Mary. At best, they would all be dependent on Mr. Collins for the rest of their lives. Elizabeth thought back to Georgiana's offer to remain with her after her mourning. It was so tempting. How she loved Georgiana. But what of Mr. Darcy? Would he ever condescend to become Wickham's brother? How could she bear staying in the same house with Mr. Darcy under any other circumstances? Her eyes started to burn. 'Oh please, Lizzy, no more crying.' But it made no difference, no difference at all.

Wickham wrote back to Darcy that he would be prepared to marry Lydia on the 8th, at eleven in the morning at St. Clement's. Darcy wrote to Mr. Gardiner, apprising him of Colonel Fitzwilliam's news and the wedding date, time and place. Although pleased, no one was happy about it except Lydia, and she did not seem to require anyone else's good humor. She was looking forward to being called 'Mrs. Wickham,' and signing her name 'Mrs. Wickham' and being able to chaperone Kitty at the balls in Newcastle when she would come to visit. She was sure she could get a husband for her. But not for Lizzy - she was too old and serious these days. She took this mourning business too much to heart. She looked ugly in those dark gowns, and who would want to marry someone ugly, except for Mr. Collins, who was to wed Mary. Lizzy's only chance was Mr. Darcy, and what was all the money in the world to a man in uniform?

For their part, Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner felt inadequate to their calling. In their home was a wayward niece. Yes, Lydia was not their favorite, but still she was family, and in need of help, which they were happy to be able to provide. They wanted so much for her to realize just for a minute all the pain and anguish that she had brought upon her parents and the potential loss faced by her sisters because of her action, but she would hear none of it. They were completely frustrated. They would talk to Lydia, and she would completely shut them out. She would later tell Elizabeth that she had not heard one word in ten. Only for Elizabeth's sake could the Gardiner's retain any amount of patience with the unworthy girl who deserved none of the attention she was getting from Mr. Darcy. One thing that had Mr. Gardiner worried, though: was the extent to which Mr. Darcy was aware of how completely ungrateful Lydia was for all that he was doing in her behalf? Would he change his mind upon noticing her ingratitude?

"My love, this has nothing to do with Lydia or Wickham. He is doing this for Lizzy," replied a gentle Mrs. Gardiner to an upset husband.

"If that is the case, Lydia and Wickham shall get from him more than they deserve," laughed her husband.

"Please, dear, this is a serious matter. Lizzy has six months of mourning left before they could possibly think of marriage, even if they should defy the usual custom of not even seeking an engagement during mourning. So how does he tell her that he loves her, what can he do to attach her affection, how does he confess the full feelings of his heart at this delicate time in her life?"

"How does he, Mrs. Gardiner?"

"He does everything he can to make her life happy. He has taken her into his home when she has been cast out of her own. He has brought his sister back from London, her usual residence, to be with her. He has kept Bingley with him, one of her friends throughout Jane's death. She lives in luxury in his household. She has huge apartments, a personal maid, and servants at her beck and call. Now, a problem arises in her family. It becomes his problem, and he throws his entire stock of resources at it. He was able to find Wickham within a week, work out a financial deal with him within another, two weeks later he had a commission for him in the north, a week after that they will be married, with time enough for a visit to Longbourn, if Mr. Bennet gives his permission, or a lovely honeymoon on the way to Newcastle. No one else could have done this, and none of this mattered personally to Mr. Darcy until it involved Lizzy. And as soon as it did, he spent every available minute working towards a successful resolution. He could have left her at Pemberley and conducted this business alone, but he brought everyone to be with him so she could be on the spot and not have to wait for information. Do you not see, Mr. Gardiner, he is treating her as if she was his wife already. And what a wonderful husband he is. Indeed, he is the second most wonderful I know."

And with that, she went over and sat on his lap. He gave her a surprised look, but recovered enough to ask whom the most wonderful husband of her acquaintance was. She snuggled up next to him, wrapped her arms around his next and began to kiss him. He responded to her kiss by holding her closer, rubbing his arms along her back, thinking it was wonderful that the children were in bed already, and hoping that he was the most wonderful husband of her acquaintance. Shortly thereafter, with her hands gliding through his hair and along the skin of his neck, he was unable to maintain any semblance of rational thought.

Chapter 19

Posted on Saturday, 16 November 2002

The wedding was five days away. Mr. Bennet was so angry with Lydia that he would give her no money for wedding clothes, but Mrs. Gardiner thought she should have at least a new dress for her wedding, so she, Lydia, and Elizabeth were at a modiste Georgiana recommended to pick out a new gown. It was to be simple and elegant, but useful for wear after the wedding at dressier occasions, such as the forthcoming dinner with General Rothwell. Lydia was quite nervous and was chattering away with every thought that crossed her mind. Elizabeth was glad she insisted that Georgiana stay at home. Elizabeth could not have endured having Georgiana hear Lydia's nonsense. Lydia liked each fabric they looked at; she thought they all were to die for, the more expensive the better, and she wanted her gown to be heavily trimmed in lace. Elizabeth tried to reason her down a little, but it did not seem to be working too well, until Mrs. Gardiner, frustrated with all the noise and time it was taking, decided to take matters in her own hands.

"Lydia, this is what I shall get you." Mrs. Gardiner then proceeded to choose a simple white muslin gown, with a very modest cut on the bodice, something Lydia tried to argue against but Mrs. Gardiner insisted upon, and lace trim around the neckline and sleeves. She also purchased for Lydia a matching bonnet, and a shawl and gloves made of the same pattern. The ladies went to a shoe seller and bought slippers that went perfectly with the ensemble. Elizabeth was pleased. Lydia's outfit spoke of simple elegance and would be something Elizabeth might have picked out for herself, but then Elizabeth and her aunt had a similar taste in clothes. Indeed, Elizabeth had her aunt buy gowns for her in London and send them to Longbourn for her without ever seeing them before, knowing full well that she would like them very much.

On Saturday morning, they went back to pick up the gown. Lydia dressed quickly and just the hem needed some work. In no time, they were on their way to lunch, listening to Lydia's exclamations over how beautiful her gown looked, and was she not very clever for having picked something out that was so pretty, and slightly different from her usual style? Elizabeth's patience was gone by the time she arrived back at the Darcy's townhouse.

Today was Monday, June 8th, the day of Lydia's wedding. Mr. Bennet had given his permission for the Wickhams to come to Longbourn after their marriage, so it had been decided that a carriage would be let for the day to convey Wickham to St. Clement's and then take him and his bride on to Hertfordshire. This carriage arrived at the church just before Darcy's carriage did at 10:30 A.M. Wickham, dressed in his best blue coat, greeted the other party.

"Good morning, Darcy. Good morning, Bingley. Hello, Miss Bennet."

"You seem to be in a happy mood today, Wickham," remarked Bingley.

"A man should always be happy on his wedding day, Bingley."

"And you are happy?"

"I am very happy, Bingley."

Darcy cleared his throat. "Shall we go in?"

The party walked down the main aisle of the church towards the altar. Elizabeth took Darcy's left arm with her right hand.

"I suppose I should thank you for arranging for the special license, Mr. Darcy. There has not been three weeks for publishing the banns." Darcy did not respond. "So, Miss Bennet, how shall you like attending your sister's wedding today?"

"I had always imagined that she would be married from Longbourn church, and that her whole family would be there to see her. I cannot help wondering how she shall feel about getting married quite alone."

"Alone? Why, you are her favorite sister, I am sure."

"Hardly. But come, Mr. Wickham, let us not argue. We are about to become brother and sister, you know."

Elizabeth sat down by herself on the left side of the church. Wickham and Darcy sat down on the right side, with Wickham at the aisle. Bingley sat down a row behind them. Just before 11:00 A.M., Lydia and Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner came into the church. At the same moment, as if he had been watching, the priest came and stood at the altar. Lydia, on Mr. Gardiner's left arm, moved down the aisle gracefully in her new gown. Wickham seemed visibly struck by her beauty, Elizabeth observed. Elizabeth had never seen Lydia looking so well. If only it could have been under the best of circumstances. Elizabeth's only comfort today, she supposed, was that the marriage was happening at all. How Lydia would be able to endure what was coming next, Elizabeth hardly knew. Wickham joined Lydia in front of the altar, where the priest stood.

As a priest, he was disappointed. Only five people attending this wedding. Five! He did not delude himself about his calling. It was a living. He could hire a curate and do nothing if he chose, but he loved the people in his congregation and wanted to do the right thing. He did not know Wickham. He met Darcy briefly who told him that Wickham needed to be married right away. Darcy had produced a special license for this couple, something the priest rarely saw, so he did everything he could to help. He had a general rule in mind when he viewed attendance at wedding services. Too many people attending, and the wedding was a sham. Not enough people attending and it was a hushed up affair. In either case, there was little chance of a successful marriage. Was this always true? No. He had married plenty of people from out of the area who were coming to visit their loved one to be married in town, and had only a handful of acquaintances. But he knew that Wickham was supposed to be an officer in a militia regiment. He should have plenty of friends. Where were they? He knew that Miss Bennet was staying with her aunt. His friends could make it even if her family could not. Something was wrong with this marriage and he foresaw only sadness and misery for this couple.

And he would have to say it was Wickham's fault. She looked up at him with a child-like eagerness that was almost pathetic, while he appeared to be bored. Normally, he had difficulty keeping a couple's attention off each other and on the service. Now he would give half his pay for the day just for a few glances between the two, any mark of affection on his side.

Reading from the Book of Common Prayer, he began: "Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of God, and in the face of this congregation, to join together this Man and this Woman in holy Matrimony; which is an honorable estate, instituted of God in the time of man's innocency, signifying unto us the mystical union that is betwixt Christ and his Church; which holy estate Christ adorned and beautified with his presence, and first miracle that he wrought, in Cana of Galilee; and is commended of St. Paul to be honorable among all men: and therefore is not by any therefore to be enterprised, nor taken in hand, unadvisedly, lightly, or wantonly, to satisfy man's carnal lusts and appetites, like brute beasts that have no understanding; but reverently, discretely, advisedly, soberly, and in the fear of God; duly considering the causes for which Matrimony was ordained."

That was the problem, was it not? This marriage was doing nothing more than satisfying man's carnal lusts and appetites. That man's lusts right there. Wickham's. And her problem is that it is being enterprised, taken in hand, unadvisedly, lightly and wantonly. Wickham knows exactly what he is doing, and Lydia has not an idea.

While the priest was wondering these things about Wickham and Lydia, Darcy's mind had traveled across the aisle to Elizabeth. He was contemplating what he had just heard as if he had been standing up with her and was trying to determine his own sincerity. While he could not admit to not feeling some form of lust for her, he was not seeking to marry her in order to satisfy it. He truly loved her. He wanted to be with her. He was ready to enter into commitments with her that were reverent, discrete, advised, sober, and in the fear of God; duly considering the causes for which Matrimony was ordained.

The service continued: "First, it was ordained for the procreation of children, to be brought up in the fear and nurture of the Lord, and to the praise of his holy Name."

The priest felt sorrow here for the unborn children of this couple. Wickham would not raise them in the fear and nurture of the Lord, if he would even raise them at all.

Darcy was confident regarding this first point. He had had a lot of fun with the Gardiner children that night, and while he was not up to that on a routine basis, he knew that most couples started out with one child and he would grow to love them as he loved Elizabeth. Elizabeth was so full of love. Her children would be beautiful, just like she was. He had no doubt that they would have her fine eyes.

The serviced proceeded: "Secondly, it was ordained for a remedy against sin, and to avoid fornication; that such persons as have not the gift of continency might marry and keep themselves undefiled member's of Christ's body."

Lydia plastered an emotionless expression on her face, and hoped the preacher would quickly move on. The priest, however, enjoyed a little pause at this part to see who became uncomfortable, to find out what had really been going on with his young couples. Wickham looked down and rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet for a moment. Lydia just stared. Yes, he thought, they were guilty. It was sad. It they had no self-control now, how easy would it be to surrender it at every other important time in their lives?

Darcy looked at Elizabeth again, and was not quite sure why life without her would be considered such a higher level of living, in God's eyes, than life with her. She was the best thing He had created. How could she be accounted for sin?

"Thirdly, it was ordained for the mutual society, help and comfort that the one ought to have the other, both in prosperity and adversity, into which holy estate these two persons present come now to be joined. Therefore if any man can show any just cause, why they may not be lawfully joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter forever hold his peace."

Elizabeth looked over at Darcy, who caught her glance, smiled at him, and quickly turned away.

The priest thought that there were many reasons why they should not be joined together, but none of them lawful reasons. Either way, he knew all would hold their peace.

Darcy received her smile with gratitude. Little did she know he was pledging his life to her in the middle of Lydia and Wickham's wedding. Or did she? If he represented prosperity, she certainly had suffered adversity in the past year. Yet he knew that he was no closer to happiness than she was. The only hope he saw for himself was in her mutual society, to receive her help and comfort. And oh, how he prayed that she thought the same thing of him.

To Lydia and Wickham the priest said: "I require and charge you both, as ye will answer at the dreadful day of judgment when the secrets of all hearts shall be disclosed, that if either of you know any impediment, why ye may not be lawfully joined together in Matrimony, ye do now confess it. For be ye well assured, that so many as are coupled together otherwise than God's Word doth allow are not joined together by God; neither is their Matrimony lawful."

He gave them the customary five heartbeats to respond, but they were silent.

"Fitzwilliam Darcy, wilt thou have this Woman to be thy wedded wife..." Darcy snapped out of his daydream.

"...to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?"

Wickham said, "I will."

Darcy looked at Elizabeth and whispered, "I will."

Elizabeth looked up suddenly. She thought she had heard an echo, another "I will." She looked over at Darcy, who was staring at her. She turned away and looked at her hands.

"Lydia Bennet, wilt though have this Man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou obey him, and serve him, love, honor, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?"

This is what Elizabeth wanted to hear. This was the desire of her heart. She looked over at Darcy and whispered, "I will." She watched him for a moment, his head bowed, as if he was contemplating the words being spoken. What could he be thinking? Was he thinking about her? He looked so beautiful.

Lydia broke the moment. "I will," she said meekly. Lydia was afraid.

The priest saw her fear. It was about time, though a little late, he thought.

Wickham began to speak the words that were taught to him by the priest. Darcy turned to Elizabeth and she to him. The distance across the aisle seemed to narrow. He wanted to reach out his hand to her.

"I, Fitzwilliam Darcy, take thee, Elizabeth Bennet, to my wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth."

Darcy and Elizabeth were swallowed up in each other's eyes.

"I, Elizabeth Bennet, take thee, Fitzwilliam Darcy, to my wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, cherish, and to obey, till death us do part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I give the my troth."

Elizabeth was holding her breath. Darcy could not move. Wickham's voice was heard through the church as he spoke to Lydia,

"With his Ring I thee Wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow: In the Name of the Father, Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen. "

At the end of what always seems to be a long service, with all the Psalms and scriptures and prayers, the unhappy couple, who were married that day, entered their carriage and were off to Longbourn. The happy couple, who was not married that day, but had exchanged their vows unspoken, returned with Bingley to the Gardiner's home for dinner. It was a quiet afternoon and evening.

In what seemed like a repeat of last winter, a servant came to the door of Elizabeth's sitting room to announce that a gentleman was waiting on her in the drawing room. When asked who it was, he answered, "Mr. Thomas Bennet of Longbourn, ma'am."

She had not seen him since that day he brought her the mourning jewelry, since that day she had beat her fists on his chest, asking why she had been cast off by him and her family. And now he was back. Since then, she had learned some things from Lydia. She had learned that her parents argued over her, that her father was threatened with having to leave the house if he allowed Elizabeth to come back, that her father was not the problem, that he was only looking after his other daughters, and in some way herself, that the true responsibility for this rested with her mother. Elizabeth felt tears in her eyes. How she missed him. She had misjudged him. She slowly descended the staircase and went to him in the drawing room.

She paused at the entrance to the drawing room. His back was to her.

"Papa?"

He turned to face her. "Elizabeth, my child."

She ran to him and threw her arms around him and cried into his chest. He held on to her with tears in his own eyes.

"I am so sorry, Lizzy, so sorry."

They stood that way for what seemed like forever, until he released her and held her at arm's length. "You look good, Lizzy. Mr. and Miss Darcy must be taking good care of you."

"Oh yes, father, they are. I could not have better friends. They love me," she paused, "and I love them."

"Mr. Darcy is a very fortunate man, then. I hope he deserves you."

"He is the best man I know, father. The kindest, the most generous, the gentlest, the most tender man I know, and I love him dearly."

"Have you come to an understanding together?"

"No, we have not spoken of it, but I know he feels the same for me. I believe he is hesitant because of the delicacy of my mourning. I feel great hope in the face of my sorrow over Jane's death. He loves me, Papa."

"I am so happy for you. You deserve some joy in your life."

"How is my mother and Mary and Kitty?"

"As you know, Mary is to wed Mr. Collins in December. We see him about once a month, for the better part of a week. I do not know what she sees in him, but she really likes him. When a father gives away a daughter in marriage, it is more important for his daughter to like the man than himself, so if I have secured her happiness, I am satisfied. It is a good match for her, though that would not matter if she did not like him. I give her every chance I can to change her mind, but she will not. They whisper and talk and read sermons together and write summaries of what they have read in a book. I have to say that he truly loves her. It has been months now since he has been coming, and he has been faithful to her. Their affection has stood the test of time. Of course, your mother could not be more pleased. Mary is by far and away her favorite daughter now.

"Kitty is settling down. She is no longer as wild and as unrestrained as she was when Mrs. Wickham was living at home. She is disappointed, though, that I have refused permission for her to travel to Newcastle to stay with Mrs. Wickham for the summer. Unless the Wickhams come to visit, Kitty will never see Lydia again, as far as I am concerned. I have learned my lesson, and Kitty will feel the effects of it.

"There is nothing to say for your mother. She fancies herself ill at the slightest provocation. She blames you for Jane's death, and will not cease to mention her feelings to any and every person that will listen to her. I take as much refuge in my library as before to avoid her ignorance and insipidity."

"Papa, Lydia told me that I am a cause of disagreement between you and Mama. Please do not argue over me. I am resolved to my situation. And I do not find it at all bad. I know you must think of Mary and Kitty, and even me, and must avoid any type of open disagreement between you, like Mama threatens. You are doing the right thing." Elizabeth wiped away another tear. "Why did you not tell me? It would not have hurt me so much."

"What was I supposed to say, Lizzy? That your mother hates you? Would that have hurt less? I did not think so. I took the blame on myself, as much as I could anyway. I had hoped to write to you someday, after you were settled, when your mother could not hurt you anymore. I am hoping that I am not pre-judging your situation now."

"About what?" asked Elizabeth.

"I was caught by your mother, in what appeared to be a compromising situation, with one of Mrs. Long's nieces. She threatened to expose me to the neighborhood as an adulterer if I did not cast you out of the house. Indeed, I was doing nothing with the young lady, but I could not allow you and your sisters to be tainted by a scandal. I knew that Mr. Bingley or Mr. Darcy would accept you into their household. My only fear is what would happen after Jane's year was over. I did not want to hurt you, Lizzy, but I had no choice. You do not know how it pained me to see you cry that afternoon when I walked out of Netherfield the last time I saw you. If I was violent, I could have killed your mother."

"Oh, Papa, do not say such things, do not distress yourself. You can see that I am well now."

"It should never have happened. It was my own stupidity."

Chapter 20

Posted on Monday, 18 November 2002

Mr. Darcy invited Mr. Bennet to remove from his rooms at the Knight's Inn to the townhouse, where he stayed for a week. During this time, Mr. Bennet carefully observed Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy together. While they did not exhibit any outward signs of attachment, there was enough eye contact and lingering touches that left Mr. Bennet with no doubt of their mutual affection. On the last day of Mr. Bennet's visit, he was able to encounter Mr. Darcy alone in his library. He approached him thus,

"Mr. Darcy, may I have a few moments of your time?"

"You are very welcome, sir, please come in." Darcy had come to like Mr. Bennet, despite his objections over his treatment of Elizabeth. He had a dry sense of humor that seemed to spare nothing that was ridiculous, and he was quite frank and open with his opinions, a trait that was refreshing to Darcy, who was used to the guarded conversation of the social circles of London, who took great care not to offend anyone of significance.

"Port or brandy, Mr. Bennet?"

"Please make mine brandy, and perhaps you should join me."

"Oh? I will then. What is on your mind, sir?"

"I would like to talk about Elizabeth," Mr. Bennet said, watching Darcy carefully, "and you."

Darcy nearly choked on a swallow of brandy.

"Of Miss Bennet and myself?"

"I am probably violating her confidence, but I feel I have no choice. She has spoken to me at length regarding the affection she feels for you. She also told me that she is aware of strong feelings of attachment that you have for her. Apparently, during an illness she suffered from in the spring, you opened your heart to her at a time when you thought she could not hear you. Well, she did."

"Mr. Bennet, I do not know what to say."

"You do not have to say much to me, but you will need to say some things to Elizabeth. Talk to her openly of how you feel. She believes that you have not spoken to her out of respect for her mourning. I appreciate that very much. She, however, grows tired of it, I believe. She loves you very much." Mr. Bennet stepped over to the table by the wall to refill his glass. "It is not easy for me, as her father, to see someone else become the most important man in her life. She describes you as the best man she knows."

"I love your daughter very much, sir. I have loved her since the time she was at Netherfield caring for Miss Jane. I believe I have done everything in my power to assure her happiness, as much as it could be secured given the circumstances, since her time at Netherfield. It is my intention to go on in that manner for the rest of my life."

"Mr. Darcy, the reason for my visit to you this evening is to give my consent to your marriage. I know you have not asked for it, but I do not know if it will be in my power to see you at any other time. You cannot come to Longbourn on her behalf. You certainly cannot bring her there. Take care of her, Mr. Darcy. Love her. Cherish her."

"I will, Mr. Bennet. I will do all of those things."

"Please excuse me now, Mr. Darcy." Mr. Bennet took a lonely walk up to his room. He knew he had just parted with Elizabeth forever. Certainly, he would see her again, but when? And when he did, she would not be his. He had just given her away to Mr. Darcy, a man he knew by reputation only, a reputation almost entirely based on the words of the very woman he was to marry, his daughter, hardly an impartial discovery. Well, he would certainly like Elizabeth's husband better than Lydia's or Mary's.

Darcy watched the door close on Mr. Bennet. He sat back in his chair, almost unable to support his own weight. Elizabeth loved him so very dearly, enough to speak of him to her father? And then her father would speak of those things to him, and give his consent to a marriage, without being asked? He knew without a doubt that there was an attachment between them. He knew of his own regard for her, and he knew that she was beginning to show some signs of an affection towards him, but all this? Incredible! Wonderful! It was all he could do not to run up to her bedchamber and throw himself at her feet right now. Of course now was not the time, but what happiness would be theirs when they could share together their feelings for one another! He would never have said such things to her in the spring if he had known that she could hear and understand him, but how grateful he was now. It seemed as if this was the basis for the understanding that would soon be theirs. Looking ahead, he knew they could not be married until after her mourning period was over, but that did not matter. He had known that all along. She was to be his. How could any man be more fortunate than he was?

Recovering, Darcy sat down with a clean sheet of paper to write to his solicitor, instructing him to begin drawing up settlement papers for his upcoming betrothal to Elizabeth Bennet, and to send over his mother's engagement ring. After folding and addressing the missive, he retired to his room. He was satisfied that he could look back over the course of their relationship and feel that he had done everything he could to make her life easier, to work to her advantage, to serve her, that everything he had done, he had done for her. He loved her so much. If only he could have taken away the pain of the last few months. She did not deserve to suffer so much. Darcy could not think of another person more harmless than she, yet all these struggles had been heaped upon her. Well, he would spend the rest of his life trying to ease her burdens and restoring her to happiness. It would be no struggle for him. It was exactly what he wanted to do. He was glad he had given her the brooch. It was a tangible sign of affection given to her before her father came, a testament of his affection for her before her father kindled the fires. There would be no question in her mind of his love for her. He was so full of excitement that he was unable to sleep for hours. And when he did, his mind was happily employed with dreams of the new Mrs. Darcy and all of the things that would make their lives happy together.

The next morning was a melancholy one for Elizabeth. She had finally come to an understanding with her father after all these months, yet he could not be persuaded to stay with them longer and had to go, so she must say goodbye to him. Darcy and Bingley left them alone.

"Oh Papa, I wish you could accept Mr. Darcy's offer and stay longer."

"As do I, child, but I must return to your mother at Longbourn. I told her I would be gone a week on business in London, and if I delay my return, she will grow suspicious of my having seen you. She believes you to be at Pemberley now."

"Did you not also?"

"Yes, until Mr. Gardner wrote to tell me how Lydia had been found and married. I knew he could not have done that. I did not know who could have, though, so I immediately set off to their home and confronted them. They could not long deny the truth to me. I came here immediately. Mrs. Gardiner first told me of your attachment to Mr. Darcy, and the kind manner in which he treated you, and that I should be careful in my treatment of him, or I would hurt you, which is something I will never do again."

"Oh father, this must have distressed you greatly."

"Indeed it did, at first, until I realized that a young lover must have his way, and of that I am resolved. I do not know when I can see you again." He smiled at her, "My love, you should know that I related our conversation regarding Mr. Darcy to the man himself over brandy last night.

"Papa! You did not!"

"Indeed I did. He had a similar story to tell me about you. Lizzy, I have given him my consent to marry you. He did not ask for it, but I know that sometime he would have, but I do not know if, at that time, he will be able to see me. He cannot come to Longbourn on your behalf, and he cannot bring you there."

"I see."

"Lizzy, he loves you, and has promised me to always love you and cherish you. He has not spoken to you yet out of respect for your mourning. I told him that he must not wait for that."

"Papa, how am I to go back in the house and face him now?" Elizabeth asked fretfully.

"Easily. He loves you, and you love him. Go to him and express your love for him."

"Oh, Papa!" She blushed, then said, "You have a safe journey. I do not know how much longer we shall remain in London, but I will leave you word in Meryton. Give everyone my love, as you are able."

"Indeed I will, sweetheart." With that, Elizabeth pulled his head down and kissed his forehead and he kissed her hand. He stepped quickly into the waiting carriage. The servant put up the stair, and he was off. She knew not when she would see him again, and she left him with a tear in her eye.

Not knowing what she would find in the house, or who awaited her there, Elizabeth slowly turned and walked through the threshold, tears glistening in her eyes. Mr. Darcy was standing there waiting for her. She could not meet his gaze, but walked over to him. He could see that she was about to cry, and assumed it was because she was missing her father. Elizabeth looked up at him.

"Mr. Darcy, thank you for the kindness you have shown my father. I know you have had no respect for him because of his treatment of me. You must understand that he had no choice, that it is all my mother's doing, and that I love him very much."

"I have enjoyed his company. He has a singular sense of humor which pleases me, and if you love him still, I will try to also." He smiled at her, took her hand and continued, "Your father gave you to me."

She stepped closer to him and put her other hand on his chest. "Has he?" Her lips curled into a slightly provocative smile.

"He has given me his consent to marry you."

She leaned into him. "He did?"

"Yes."

"Had you asked for his consent?" she asked.

"No, I had not. I imagined that this would come later."

"Later?"

"Well, it has been my intention to ask you to be my wife after your mourning is over."

"It was? And now?"

"Mr. Bennet said that I probably could not see him later, not on your behalf, at least. He told me about your conversation with him concerning me. He was fearful of violating your confidence, but felt I had to know your feelings."

"And?"

"And I told him how I felt about you."

"Which is?"

"I told him that I loved you. That I have loved you since the time you were at Netherfield caring for your sister. I told him that all I have done is to insure your happiness, as much as it has been possible, since I have known you."

"You told him that?"

"Yes."

"And what did my father say?"

"To love you and to cherish you. He also said that it was difficult for him to see another man become more important in your life than he was. He said that you told him that I was the best man that you have ever known."

"I did." She smiled at him. "And then?"

"I told him I would do all of those things for the rest of my life."

"What things?"

"To love and to cherish you."

She took her hand from his and began to trace the outline of his lips. Darcy was not expecting this, to be sure, though it was certainly not unwelcome. She moved her ministrations to his face, with a curious expression on her own face, mixed with love, happiness and sorrow. Darcy could not understand. Someday he hoped to understand her. He put his arms around her waist and drew her near to him. She was so warm, so soft. She took both her hands and framed his face and bent it towards hers and gently kissed his lips. She was the first to break the kiss. She had a happier smile now, one of relief and contentment. He bent down and kissed her gently. She reached up with both arms around his neck and drew him close to her. The kiss deepened as months of passion were unleashed, and volumes of silent communication suddenly became spoken between them. Darcy pulled away first this time, beaming in satisfaction.

"I love you, Elizabeth."

"I love you, Fitzwilliam."

"Elizabeth, my love, will you marry me? Will you marry me just as soon as we can?"

"Yes, my love, I will. I will marry you. I also promise to love and cherish you forever."

"I am so fortunate to have you. I have always wanted you. I could not wish for anything else."

She looked at him with tears in her eyes, with such a look of love and tenderness, as he had never seen from anyone before, as made him love her more than he ever felt possible.

He could not resist. He reached up and touched her lips. He caressed her cheeks and the soft skin below her ear. Elizabeth rewarded him with a sigh. He touched the tears that had fallen from her eyes. She turned her face into his hand, kissed his palm, and leaned against his chest. He felt so strong, she felt so secure in his arms. She knew she had found her home. He held her close, their bodies forming a single person, to be joined in love for the rest of their lives.

When the ladies went up to dress for dinner, Elizabeth followed Georgiana into her room.

"Georgie, there is something I would like to tell you."

"What is it, Lizzy?"

"Your brother and I are engaged to be married," said Elizabeth shyly.

"Oh, Lizzy, that is wonderful news!" Georgiana jumped up and gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "We are truly to be sisters, and you are not to move away. Oh, I am so excited. When is the wedding to take place? How did he ask you?"

"We cannot be married until after my mourning is over. I shall ask Mr. Darcy if we can be married on November 28th, a Saturday, at the Lambton church. As far as asking me? I confess, I believe we asked each other today in the entryway after my father left."

"Oh, Lizzy, you are not serious."

"I am very serious. My father has been playing matchmaker, with a little help from my aunt Gardiner. I love him so very dearly, Georgie. I hope you are not angry with me. I know he shall be giving me much of his attention."

"Lizzy, I am happy for you. I could not have chosen a better wife for him. My brother needs someone he can overwhelm with love. He has a big heart if he will risk showing it, a great capacity for love. He has been starving for it. I cannot supply it. Perhaps his wife can. Oh Lizzy, I know you can. You deserve such happiness in your life."

"Charles, do you have a moment to spare for me in the library?"

"Darcy, you never call me Charles. What have you done? Or what have I done, for that matter?"

"You have done nothing, yet. I am hoping that you will be my groomsman at my wedding."

"You are to be married? You finally asked Miss Elizabeth? Darcy, this is wonderful!"

"I cannot tell you how much I love her, Bingley. And coming to an understanding with her makes me love her that much more. It is wonderful. I have never been so happy."

Dinner that evening was a joyous affair for the friends and now sometime lovers.

The next day, Elizabeth and Darcy paid a call on the Gardiners so that they could share in their joy. Mrs. Gardiner was very pleased for her niece, who, for the first time in a long time, had a look of joy in her eyes.

Business seemed to be concluded in town, and by the beginning of August, the party had arrived back in the cooler environs of Derbyshire and Elizabeth's future home at Pemberley. Indeed, Darcy's motive for their removal from town was to give the future mistress an opportunity to redecorate her apartments and other rooms as she felt appropriate. It had been a long time since Pemberley had seen a woman's touch, and it was long overdue.

Elizabeth was glad to be back at Pemberley. She did not realize how much she had missed it. Being afraid to become attached to any place as her home, she was suddenly aware of the freedom that was before her. She was allowed to become attached to Pemberley. She went out everyday, sometimes alone, sometimes with Mr. Darcy, usually with Georgiana, to enjoy the walks, spending more time than usual viewing the house from different angles and at different times of day to enjoy the changing light.

"Georgie, I love this place. I am the most fortunate woman in the world to be able to call Pemberley my home. I have never seen a place more happily situated."

"Indeed, it is a beautiful place. I will miss it."

"Are you to be leaving it, Georgie?"

"I cannot stay here forever, you know. I do want a home of my own some time. And I do not expect that it could ever be as beautiful as Pemberley. I just hope I do not live far away."

"Georgie, has Mr. Bingley found a place yet?"

"Lizzy, I do not know about Mr. Bingley. He is kind and nice, but he seems afraid of me sometimes. I do not know if he thinks I am too young, or if he just loved Jane too much to ever be happy with another woman. He does not seem happy. It breaks my heart. I would do everything I could, I would spend every waking moment trying to make him happy."

"Georgie, you are too good, and if Mr. Bingley does not chose you, then some other young man will. You will always have a home with us. I could not be parted from you."

"Thank you, Lizzy. It is strange to think of you taking my place in that house. I am glad to release my brother to your care. I do not think I did a very good job of it. He thinks I am too young to confide in."

"Most men will behave differently with their wives than they will with their sisters, particularly one who is so much younger like you are."

The next day Elizabeth toured the mistress's apartments at Pemberley with her fiancé. Mr. Darcy had arranged with Mrs. Reynolds to have the rooms aired out and cleaned. Darcy had been in them but few times since his father had died. Formerly, he had accompanied his father into them to 'visit' his mother after she had passed away. Those were difficult memories. Soon he would share them with Elizabeth. She would understand. She would understand everything. Elizabeth also understood the implications of the one door along the common wall of the room that adjoined her bedchamber to Mr. Darcy's. She blushed to think about it, but anticipated its use just the same.

The room was fixed up with deep cherry colors and lighter wallpaper, with cherry furniture. Darcy told her she could make any changes she wanted to the rooms, and indeed there were things she thought she might like to change. But she also knew that Darcy had a lot of memories associated with these rooms, and until she knew what they were, and what kind of pain they held for him, she was not going to change a thing.

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