Jump to new as of December 4, 2001
Jump to new as of January 2, 2002
Jump to new as of June 16, 2002
Chapter 1, Scene 1
From the distance, a regal, stately manor can be seen. Some say that this estate could be called beautiful *snort*, others would say pretentious *now that's more like it!*. All would have to agree that it seemed peaceful *peaceful my arse!*, that is until a screeching, "Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!," echoed through the air.
"Collins!!! Collins!!! Where are you!!!" shrieked a, more than usual, indignant Lady Catherine de Bourgh *I wonder how she pulled that one off!* as she sat shell shocked in her sitting room.
Mr. Collins made quite the scene *doesn't he always?* as he came scurrying into the room *just think of how a little annoying, yapping dog would make his entrance*. He was so preoccupied in hurrying into the room that he didn't even notice that the edge of the Persian rug was flipped up, that is until he tripped on it. He flew through the air and slid across the carpet *OK, it was more like rolled across the carpet*. His sliding *rolling* didn't stop until he reached Lady Catherine's feet. Looking up with a sweaty, carpet burnt face *HA!*, he began to pant an apology. "Please, huff, forgive, huff, me, huff, Lady Catherine!," he paused for a short breath of air *OK, so it was more like ten minutes* before he continued. "As soon as I heard, huff, your scream, huff, I ran here, huff, as fast as I could *Ha! Collins running! Oh wait! I just got a mental picture...I think I'm going to be sick...*. I would by no means, huff, try to upset you. You are, huff, the most humble, condescending patroness, huff, a clergyman like myself could have. You have my..."
"Collins, would you shut up before you pass out!" He was immediately silenced as he saw the deathly glare he was given. "Now, I have something that I need to speak to you about. I have just received a letter from my nephew Mr. Darcy. It seems that he is to be married to that upstart, pretentious girl, Elizabeth Bennet! This is not to be borne! *anyone else ready to b**** slap her yet?*"
"What do you, huff, plan on doing, huff, about it," asked a still heavily panting Collins, who was still on the ground.
"This is why I called you here *called, shrieked, same difference...this is Lady Cat we're talking about!*. I have a plan, Collins, and I'll need your assistance." Collins readily agreed to help his noble patroness *OK, I could bore you all with his answer but just the mere thought of it makes me roll my eyes*. Lady Catherine went on to tell Collins about her devious plan *I won't bore with these details either...wait, it just occurred to me some of you might want to know, oh well, it'll just be a surprise then* while the person spying on them went unnoticed.
Scene 2:
It was like any other day at Evil Twin Inc. Tabbi running around, shrieking madly about the world coming to an end...Amy looking through a catalogue for new commando gear...Julie sitting in the corner with a bottle of wine in hand...and Mortie shining her crystal ball. Yup, everything was normal *Snirt! If that is what you would call normal! : P*.
Everyone stopped what they were doing when they heard the phone ring. They unanimously yelled, "I'll get it!," as they all made a mad dash for the phone. Mortie was the first to grab the phone, but as she went to answer it, Tabbi hit her with a fish *I could have sworn it had 'Up Yours' printed on the side of it!* knocking the cordless out of her hand. As Tabbi bent down to grab the phone, Amy came up behind her and pushed her to the floor. Amy dived for the phone but missed as Julie swiftly picked up the, still ringing, cordless and answering it. "Hello, Evil Twin Inc. Julie speaking."
"Julie!"
"Sarah!" Amy, Tabbi, and Mortie just glared at Julie while they were rubbing the bumps and bruises they got from the phone fiasco. "How's everything going? I haven't talked to you for who knows how long!"
"Everything's fine, but this isn't a social call. I'm calling about business. Is everyone else there?"
"Business eh? Oh, yeah, everyone's here. Hold on, I'll put you on speakerphone."
Once Sarah *maybe I really should just say 'I', since it is after all me* was put on the speakerphone, Tabbi shrieked, "Sarah!!! Where's that story of yours? I can't even remember how long ago you promised to write and post it!!! I want to know where it is!!!"
"Tabbi!!! Don't you know that this is the story!!!"
"Oh yeah! Duh!"
"OK, if no one else has anything else to say, I need to discuss something with you all."
"I didn't do it!" exclaimed Mortie.
"Do what?"
"Um, nothing." Amy, Julie, and Tabbi eyed Mortie suspiciously. It didn't help her case that her eyes kept shifting left and right nervously.
"Spill!!! We know that you did something!" cried Amy.
"Guys, I really don't have time for this! As much as I would love for you three to give Mortie a trial, I need you to stop and be serious for a moment! *Ha! Yeah right! Like there's a single serious cell in their bodies!*"
A unanimous, "Sorry!" came as a response from the guilty group.
"Good. Now like I was saying, I'm calling about business. My employer, Mr. Darcy," Sarah *maybe I really should start to use 'I'* had to take the phone away from her ear when a collective scream came from the group. Once the screaming ceased, she began to talk again, "As we all know, Mr. Darcy is getting married to Elizabeth the day after tomorrow," there was a collective sigh. "He has it on good authority that Lady Catherine plans on trying to ruin and even try to stop the wedding! He has told me to employ your services to stop Lady Catherine's disastrous plan. What do you say? Will take up this mission?"
"You know we will!!! Anything for Darcy!!!" came Julie's response.
"Of course! I would kill for Darcy!!!" was Mortie's answer.
"Ha!!! This means I might be able to get my hands on the Colonel!!!" was Tabbi's only reply.
"Sarah, I don't even see why you bothered to ask. You know that we'll do anything for Darcy!" was Amy's answer.
"Good! I'm faxing you all the info you'll need. Good luck!"
Chapter 2
Scene 1 No matter how many times Sarah *OK! I'm dropping this issue all together!* saw Pemberley, its grandness would always stupefy her. The master of the house didn't help her senses in the least bit *hee! Well you just try to be near Darcy and see how much sense you'll have left!* Luckily Sarah would be able to gather enough of her wit to actually appear unaffected by Darcy *snirt! Yeah right! I would be putty in his hands! Unaffected my arse!*
"Mr. Darcy, I've hired Evil Twin Inc. for the Operation: Wedding assignment."
"Thank you Sarah. There is one thing I would like to know."
"And that would be?"
"How good are they?"
"They're the best of the best! They are very efficient and haven't failed an assignment yet! But, I won't lie to you, they can tend to be a little, ahem, crazy *snort! A little crazy?*
"A little crazy? How little is a little?"
"Mr. Darcy, I assure you, Evil Twin Inc. are the best at what they do. They won't fail you."
"I trust your instincts Sarah. If you say they are as good as they are, then I should have no reason to worry. You haven't failed me yet!"
Sarah thanked Mr. Darcy full heartedly for the compliment while blushing very becomingly *What? Can't I have a moment?* After she was able to regain her senses *So? You know you would have to regain yours constantly too!!!* she went on to explain the plan she had devised for Evil Twin Inc. to employ.
Scene 2:
It had been at least an hour since they had gotten off the phone with Sarah, and they were still receiving her fax.
"Gah! How much information can she be sending us!"
"Tabbi, calm down! You know how organized and informative Sarah will be when it concerns Darcy."
"Mortie's right. You know how much she loves the man! She would do anything for him!"
"Like I don't know that Julie! But, she doesn't need to be this instructive!" *shrug*
Julie and Mortie just rolled their eyes at Tabbi. Amy came bouncing into the room with lunch for everyone, stating the obvious. "So the fax is still coming in." Amy gave an enquiring look when Tabbi fell backwards onto the floor. *Ha!* Not waiting for an answer, Amy simply stepped over the clump, which is known as Tabbi, and began to set the table for lunch. Everyone, including the clump, went and sat down to delicious Chinese takeout *YUCK!* while waiting for the fax to end!
Three hours, five paper refills, seventeen bizarre jokes, nine prank calls, and thirty two fortune cookies later, they finally obtained the final page of Sarah's fax *shrug* They found that it was a very detailed *no surprise there* plan for them to utilize. Seeing as how they all knew they wouldn't be able to even remotely memorize any of it, they just threw it out, kept the needed information, and began to devise their own ingenious *insane* plan.
Chapter 3, Scene 1
All those who had seen Mr. Collins would have to agree that he wasn't the most *ahem* capable, mentally and physically, person around *understatement?*. However that's what he wanted others to think. Collins was a very accomplished man with many resources. He was a skilled martial arts expert with an incredibly high IQ. *OK! OK! I'll stop lying!!!* That was what Collins would like to think. In fact, he was worse then what people really thought. Nevertheless, Lady Catherine put her full faith in him for blundering up Darcy's wedding.
You would think that I would go and relate how Collins planned and prepared to ruin the wedding, but what can I say, I don't feel like it *shrug*. Just think of this as a chance for audience interaction if you really want to know what he planned. Wait! It can be a surprise! Yeah! That's it! Call it a miniature cliffhanger. The master, evil plan *rolls eyes* will come out sometime. *Finds herself relieved that she was able to cover up her laziness or inability to write about Collins.*
Chapter 3, Scene 2
*Sniff* The whole situation concerning the Vice President is a sad, sad thing. You would think that one of the four would be it, but I have to tell you otherwise. The Vice President of Evil Twin Inc. is none other than a common, off the shelf Snickers bar! *Cries hysterically* I know, I know, but someone *more like something* had to do the job. You see, at one time, Evil Twin Inc. had a real live person to be it's VP, and that person was Coleen. Sadly, the government *I can't say which, since I would end up being held captive in some rat filled dungeon in Cancun, being tickled to death by a feather duster. Not a very good fate. And if that happened then who would finish this story?* enlisted her for an undercover espionage job. That happened three and half years ago, and she has yet to return. From my sources, I can tell you she is alive and well. Coleen is just still trying to unearth all that she needs to know to take down the people *who I can not name* she was hired to take down. *Did any of that make sense? Probably not. But here's the true question, do I care? Not in the least!!!*
OK! Back to the point. Did I even have a point? Probably not. Oh yeah! Tabbi, Amy, Julie, and Mortie were each in charge of different divisions *whew!*. I'll just shut up and let the story continue down its natural course. *Rolls eyes*
Tabbi angrily slammed her fist on the desk. "This is not going to work. We're missing something, but what?"
Amy rubbed her eyes, due to the lack of sleep she had in the past two days and said, "I'm not sure. We only have 23 more hours before the wedding and if we don't get out plan together, we won't be able to stop Lady Cat and Collins." There was a collective gasp from Julie and Mortie.
Mortie burst out with, "We can't let that happen!" Julie, on the other hand, found that she could use a glass of wine to help calm her nerves. The phone rang to the surprise of the group. However, it was not a surprise that Sarah was the caller.
"Hey, how goes the mission?"
"Um, it's going."
"Yeah right. Well, I have good news for you all. Mr. Darcy has informed that he is sending four of his best men to assist you in the O:W mission."
Tabbi suddenly yelled, "We don't need some guys barging in here and messing up our plans!"
"Tabbi, just give these guys a chance. I think you'll be very happy with them. They should be arriving there any minute." With that, Sarah hung up.
As if by magic, there was a knock on the door. Julie slowly made her way to the door as Amy tried to calm down an irate Tabbi. "What is she thinking!?!? We don't need assistance! We're the best!"
As soon as Julie opened the door, Tabbi was immediately silenced. The four men that came to assist were none other than Colonel Anthony Lysander Fitzwilliam, his twin brother Captain Alexander Montgomery Fitzwilliam, Special Agent Mulder Fox, and the Houdini himself, Brandon. All four women stood there shocked, not uttering a single word.
Chapter 4, Scene 1
Tabbi, Amy, Mortie, and Julie were all torn between swooning *shrugs* and having an angry outburst. Of course, Tabbi chose the latter.
"Look! We don't need any men to come in here and try to take things over!!! We've done just fine without anyone else all these years! And you should also know..." Before she could make a bigger scene, Amy, Julie, and Mortie all jumped her. While Julie and Mortie held the hysteric Tabbi *surprising, I think not* down while Amy bound and gagged.
Wiping her brow, Amy said, "Sorry about that. Tabbi can be, er, well...there's really no way to explain it. Tabbi is Tabbi. Just ignore her."
As best as they tried, it was kind of hard to ignore her. She kept knocking her chair back and forth, making muffled, angry noises, which one can only assume to be curses. All the while she was trying to break free from her confine, Tabbi did not notice the amused look on Colonel Fitzwilliam's face.
"Um, maybe we should move into the conference room so we can actually get some work done. It'll give Tabbi a chance to cool down." Everyone agreed with Mortie's suggestion and made there way to the conference room.
"O.K., now that we have some peace around this place *peace around Evil Twin Inc. hardly ever happens, so you should be surprised!* we might be able to get some work done. Plus, we've never been properly introduced. I'm Julie, Amy is the one sitting by the window, Mortie is the closest to the door, and of course, the insane one tied up out there is Tabbi."
Speaking with his rich English accent, Captain Fitzwilliam said, "Sarah has already informed us who you all are. She's, ahem, informative to say the least." The three, somewhat, sane members of Evil Twin Inc. gave each other a knowing look.
"Wait a minute! Grace, is that you?"
With a smirk, Mortie said, "I've been wondering how long it would take you to figure out it was me." Forgetting everyone else was there, Brandon ran towards her and gave her a huge hug *grins...figure I would give you what you want*.
"Can we get to business already!?!?"
With a sheepish grin, both Mortie and Brandon said, "Sorry," to Amy. Everyone settled down in a chair around the huge mahogany table and went straight to work, talking about tactics and how the plan would all play out.
What can I tell you, the men became mesmerized with the women. OK, to put specific dwiggies out of misery, Colonel Fitzwilliam found himself to be incredibly attracted towards Tabbi, even though she was tied up in the other room, Captain Fitzwilliam was head over heals for Julie, Amy had Mulder tied around her little finger, even though she didn't know it, and last but not least, Mortie had Brandon thinking about how much he missed her and thinking that he needed to propose so he wouldn't lose her again! Yup, that's the way the cookie crumbled. Everyone in the room found it hard to concentrate, since they were thinking about a certain person.
With a big bang, the conference room door burst open to reveal an incensed Tabbi. However, Colonel Fitzwilliam couldn't help but think how lovely her eyes glowed when she was enraged.
"Seeing as how there is no way to get around this, I'll agree to work with you, only if you follow certain guidelines."
"Wait, Tabbi, how did you manage to escape?"
Shaking her head, she said, "You three need a lesson in tying ropes better. Just be glad I wasn't the enemy." Falling out of their chairs, they sat on the floor glaring at Tabbi, while she gave them a cheeky smile.
Colonel Fitzwilliam interrupted by saying, "I believe you said something about guidelines."
"Give the man a prize for stating the obvious!"
"Look, you don't have to be so rude. We came here to do our job and we won't leave until it's done! Hear this and hear it now. I won't take any more outbursts from you we will get along until this mission is over with."
"I don't know who you think you are buster, but this is my company," Amy coughed, making Tabbi correct herself, "I mean, this is our company and we don't need any men coming in here and helping us. We've gotten along fine without any assistance before and we certainly will get along fine without you!"
"Like I said before, we're here because we have a job to do."
"That's it! I'm calling Sarah!"
"It wasn't Sarah's idea."
"Then whose was it?"
"Darcy's."
Amy, Mortie, and Julie gave each other a mischievous glance, seeing as how Tabbi wouldn't be able to think of anything to say to that. Yes, it looked like Colonel Fitzwilliam could hold his own against Tabbi and it didn't go unnoticed to anyone in the room, besides Tabbi, that the Colonel appeared to be interested in him.
Hearing his cell phone ring, Captain Fitzwilliam took it out of his coat pocket and answered, "Hello, Captain Fitzwilliam speaking.....What!?!?.....You've got to be kidding!?!?.....No, thank you Sir."
Naturally curious, Mulder asked, "What was that about?"
A gleeful Captain Fitzwilliam answered, "I've just been promoted. I'm a Major now." *What? You all know that this story has never made sense, so why should it start now? Hope you're happy Julie.*
A collective, "Congratulation," came from the group.
It was decided that Amy would work with Mulder, Mortie would work with Brandon, Julie would work with Major Fitzwilliam, and Tabbi would work with Colonel Fitzwilliam. As much as Tabbi protested to the idea of working with him, she was ecstatic that he was to be her partner.
Scene 2
As much as Mortie, Julie, Amy, and Tabbi might like me writing about them, there are other characters in this story. *Mentally thinks about who she hasn't brought into this story yet....hmmm.....Wait! How could I forget! Lizzy hasn't been mentioned yet! What's a wedding without the bride?*
"Elizabeth!!!," shrieked a barely understandable Mrs. Bennet.
"Yes Mama."
"Hurry up dear, or we'll be late. Tomorrow is your wedding and you still have one last fitting. Jane already has her dressed prepared. Why can't you be more like you're sister? Oh! She will be so happy to be the mistress of Netherfield! I always knew she was bound for greatness! All that money! Oh! To be the mother of Mrs. Bingley! My poor nerves! I do not know how I will contain myself!!!" She said this while fluttering her hands through the air, making quite the spectacle of herself. *Snort! When doesn't she make a spectacle of herself?*
Coming in to rescue her sister, Jane said, "But you must remember Mama that Elizabeth is to marry Mr. Darcy. Just think of it. She will be mistress of Pemberley."
"Oh! You are quite right Jane. Of course Lizzy will be mistress of Pemberley. I know of no other who is more deserving of such a position." Elizabeth tried her best to stifle her laughter at how her mother made sound as she was taking a job position and not getting married. When they calmed Mrs. Bennet's raptures down to their normal level, they left to go to the dress makers shop.
Seeing that no one was inside, Collins opened the unlocked window and literally fell into the house, causing a loud thump. Finding what he came for, he left just as he came in, but this time he made for a more amusing sight. Instead of falling onto the grass, he fell face first into the rose bush. An even more loud, "Yelp!!!," could be heard. *LOLROTF!!! Begins to point at Collins while making fun of him* Dragging himself out of the bush, he picked up the wedding dress and made his getaway.
A.N. *speaks with an announcer's voice* Coming to a Writer's Guild near you, the wedding scene. It'll make you laugh. It'll make you cry. *gives up voice* Yeah right! Well whatever it does, I planned it. Yup, it was all planned out. *rolls eyes*
Chapter 5
Scene 1: Amazing Grace
"OK Brandon, Amy and Tabbi already assigned me my job and since you're my partner, you have to help. Our current initiative in this operation is to maintain knowledge of the enemy's movements and whereabouts at all times while devising defense tactics."
"Hmmm...Looks like this could take some time."
"Nah! This is going to be easy!"
"Easy!?!?"
"You forgot, didn't you?"
"Forgot what?"
Slapping her head she dryly replied, "You forgot that I'm the all knowing, all powerful, all seeing, the great, the mystic, the wise Mortiedamus!!!" *insert whatever special effects you deem necessary*
Grinning sheepishly he said, "Oh yeah."
Getting out her turban and crystal ball, Mortie began to chant, "Sugar, spice, and everything nice, this is what little girls are made of. Snails, gorilla hairs, and puppy dog hairs, this is what little boys are made of. Boil, boil, toil and trouble. Wait a minute! This isn't the right saying!" Stopping to think for a moment, she started again with, "Hey Melvin!!! *OK, so her crystal ball is named Melvin, you have a problem with that?* Wake up!!!" The ball began to glow and started to slowly rise in the air. It started to spin faster and faster until it stopped in mid-spin and shot off a light that made the whole room glow with the luminous light.
"Ack!!! Does Melvin always glow this bright?"
"Huh? Oh, whoops! I should have told you that you would need a pair of sunglasses. My bad. Oh well! Too late for them."
Melvin's glow went away just as quickly as it came. With the light gone, it fell to the table with a loud thud.
"Um, was that good for the crystal ball?"
"What? That!?!? That was nothing compared to some of the falls it's had in the past. OK, Melvin, show us where the enemy is."
Mortie could feel the heat rise up into her face when Brandon stepped close to her to look into the ball. Brandon, on the other hand, thought to himself that he could get used to being that close to Mortie all the time.
Scene 2: Insanity, Party of Two
"Listen you pompous jerk, we are going to do things my way!!! I don't care if you're a Colonel!!! This is my mission and it'll be done my way!!! So don't you even think that about trying to take over!!! Wait!!! Scratch that!!! Think about it!!! I'm looking for one good reason to kick your arse and this would be it!!!"
Slamming his fist on the desk he shouted, "Listen Tabbi, I didn't come here to be threatened, bossed around, or insulted!!! I very well know that this is your mission and I'm not trying to take over!!! How many times do I have to tell you that Darcy is the one who sent us here!!! He's the only reason why we even bothered to step foot into this rattrap you call a business!!!"
"A rattrap? How dare you call this place a rattrap!!! We've worked damned hard to make this organization as successful as it is now and nobody is going to bring it down!!! If you don't like it, you know where the door is!"
"Woman!!! I could hear your incoherent shouts all the way in you know where and thought I should come back and see what the hell was going on!"
"COLEEN!!! I didn't hear you come in!!!"
Grinning, she said, "I guess not! With the way you were screeching, I'm surprised you can even talk!"
Sheepishly grinning, Tabbi asked, "Why are you back? Not that I'm not ecstatic that you are back!"
"Well, Project: Hotdog Flavored Water is completed. It took me three and a half years, but I finally, single handedly might I add, took down Lord Wimble-Warble."
"Lord who?"
"Oh, that's their code name. I can't say anything else though. I've been sworn to secrecy. I swore on a stack of TV Guides."
Looking more confused than ever, Colonel Fitzwilliam spoke up in his toe curling English accent. "Could someone tell me what the hell is going on here?"
"Not you again! I though you left!!! Why can't my life go right for once? Why?"
Ignoring Tabbi, Coleen took one look at the Colonel and sweetly said to him, "I would tell what you want to know, but I can't. If I did it would be lights out for me. Oh! I forgot! I never properly introduced myself."
The Colonel watched in stupor as he watched Coleen prance around the room while she sang:
I am a girl of many names
There are so many
There's Lavender
Crazy Nut
Even Dr. Gold Noodle
There are so many
To go through the list
Would last for eternity
So to make it easy on myself
You can call me anytime
I'll be close to my phone
And when you call you can ask
Hey, is Col home?
"OK, I think that's, erm, a little more than what I wanted to know."
"What!?!? Don' you start in on Coleen!!! Ooohhhhhhh!!! Look at me! I'm some big shot with a title that thinks I'm better than everyone! Look at me, look at me!!!" Coleen could do nothing but laugh when Tabbi began to frolic in circles around the Colonel.
Grabbing one of Tabbi's arms, the Colonel forced her to sit down in a nearby chair. "Listen! I haven't been accustomed to such childish, inappropriate behavior and I'm not about to start!!! I've done nothing to you and yet you treat my companions and I like scum! You are going to stop this instant, we are going to work together and complete this mission!!! After this is over, I'm taking you out to dinner!!!"
Tabbi could tell that he meant business by the penetrating gaze he was giving her. Deciding it was in her best interest to not defy him, especially about the dinner part, she stuck out her hand and said, "OK, we have a truce, for now."
Grinning that dazzling grin of his, he said, "I think I can live with that."
All the while Coleen stood off to the side, watched, and wondered what she had missed since she'd left.
Scene 3: Ninety-Nine Bottles of Wine on the Wall
Sitting next to Major Fitzwilliam, Julie tried to think of new surprise tactics they could use when it was time to face their foes. Unfortunately, both Julie and the Major were so aware of the others presence that they couldn't think of any strategies at all.
"Would you happen to know what all the shouting is about?"
"It's probably Tabbi on another one of her rampages. Once she's on them, it's hard to get her off of them."
"Ah, so she's a, um..."
"Yeah, there aren't any sufficient words to describe her. Enough about her! We have work to do."
"You're right. A team of specialists can analyze her." Thinking for a while, he said, "I can't seem to come up with any surprise tactics. Have you thought of anything?"
Sighing, she wearily said, "Nothing has come to mind. I'm getting a glass of wine. Would you like one as well?"
"Yes, thank you." The Major silently watched Julie walk out of the room and began to think what the best way to ask her out on a date would be. Becoming frustrated with himself, he ran his hand through his hair and said, "Look at me! I'm acting like a schoolboy! This will never do!"
Bewildered, Julie asked, "What would never do?"
"Oh, nothing. I was just thinking to myself that this would never work if we don't devise a plan." Seeming satisfied, she handed him his glass of wine and took her seat by him again.
Ten wine bottles later...
"OK, so we're not going to think of anything. Luckily, I have Plan B for such emergencies. I was trying to avoid this though."
"Plan B?"
"Plan B is the filing cabinet over by the door. It is filled with surprise tactics that work. Most of them haven't been used yet. I was saving them for emergencies like this."
"This is a relief. I thought we would come up empty on our end." Coming to an instant decision, the Major looked Julie in her eyes and asked, "After this mission is over, would you like to have dinner with me?"
Blushing, she shyly replied, "I would love to."
Scene 4: World Domination Anyone?
Mulder watched Amy in amusement as she balanced herself on her head. Having to know, he asked, "Is there any reason why you're on your head?"
"Yeah, there is."
"Do you mind sharing?"
"The blood rushing to my brain helps me think."
"Really. I've never heard that method of utilizing concentration. I'm not sure where I've heard this but I heard that wine helps."
"Julie"
"What?"
"Some how, Julie was involved in you hearing that little piece of information."
Amy walked up to the window and began to look at the city below. Mulder looked at her still form and then turned his attention back to the table. He noticed an open notebook with writing and diagrams on it. Being curious, he picked it up and studied each page. He was surprised that Amy had ingeniously devised a plan to take over the world by only using a chicken feather, duct tape, a cherry sucker, nail clippers, a vase, and Chinese takeout. Every time he ran it through his head, the plan worked. There wasn't a single flaw in it.
"I never meant for another person to see that."
"I'm not sure if I should be impressed or worried."
"Just because the plan is there it doesn't mean it will be used."
"Then why did you devise it!?!? I wan the truth!"
"The only thing I can tell you is that the truth is out there."
"I'm tired of hearing that! Why won't anyone just come out and say it! Wait! I know!"
"Tell me Agent Mulder, what do you know?"
"It all makes sense now! Why didn't I see it before! I've read over the case and profile so many times it should have come to me sooner! You're the Pink Brain!"
"So you finally figured it out. I was wondering how long it would take. So, what do you intend to do now that you know my other identity?"
"For now, nothing. We have a mission to complete, but once it's over, you're coming with me. I'm warning you now. Don't do anything stupid. I'll be watching you closely."