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Posted on Wednesday, 5 May 1999

My dear Caroline and Louisa,

Your brother is the happiest man in the world. The loveliest angel on earth has consented to be my wife. Miss Jane Bennet and I shall be married in several weeks' time. I know that you will be delighted to have her as a sister; she is sweet, amiable, unpretending, and incapable of malice -- everything that a gentleman wishes to find in a lady. And were you to witness the maternal delight and ease with which she guides and loves the children in the neighborhood, I know you would share my joyful anticipation for our family's happiness.

Incidentally, I was shocked to discover that Miss Bennet had been in Town throughout last season and had attempted to communicate with us, but that Darcy had obstructed her! He has explained his reasons, however, and although I was very angry at first, I have heartily forgiven him now. His motives were entirely with a view to my best interest, rather than any personal conceit, and since he has freely confessed all to me and admitted his mistake, I see no reason to begrudge him his temporary lack of judgment. It is concealment of any sort of vicious motives which I abhor, as I am sure you are aware.

There will be no need for you to assist in the wedding preparations -- believe me most fervently in this matter -- but I look forward to your attendance on my day of joy. Believe me to be,

Your most sincere brother,

Charles

Darling sister,

This letter is woefully brief as I have many pressing matters to attend to, but I must inform you that Charles Bingley has become engaged to Miss Jane Bennet of Meryton, the elder sister of that same Miss Elizabeth who visited us during the summer. You are, of course, invited to the wedding.

Dearest Georgiana, I hope this news does not take you aback. I will confess that I had hoped one day to see an understanding between the two of you, and did not scruple to manipulate matters -- I freely admit it -- in hopes of bringing about such an end. But what must be must be, and if you could but meet the charming Miss Jane and observe Bingley's joy in anticipation of a life of mutual respect and love, I know your heart would be as full as mine.

I hope you can forgive me for my past attempts to bring you forward to him. It was very wrong of me and I shall never allow my selfish feelings to cloud my judgment again. You are the loveliest of girls and the very best of sisters, and your future husband will have no choice but to regard you as highly as does

Your devoted brother,

Fitzwilliam

Dear Mr. Bingley,

I hope you will not think me presumptuous in writing you, but my relations tell me that on this occasion a private letter is entirely suitable. My dear brother has informed me of your engagement to Miss Jane Bennet. My felicitations; I am perfectly delighted! If she is only half as charming as her sister Elizabeth, you will be exceptionally happy. Please tell me the color of her eyes and hair so that I may present her with a suitable gift.

Yours most sincerely,

Georgiana Darcy

P.S. You need not carry on for pages about it unless you absolutely insist, but if you so wish, I would be eager to hear more about the lady.

My dear brother,

Louisa joins me in wishing you all the joy in the world. We have always spoken of the lovely Jane Bennet with great fondness. How we do miss our dear friend! She is a sweet, simple creature and does indeed suit you perfectly.

But how shocking to hear that Mr. Darcy concealed her presence in London from you! Had I but known, she would have been invited to our home in an instant! Interference of any sort is my abhorrence, as you know -- but then, perhaps such a man can be forgiven since he was taking your welfare into consideration, her relatives being what they are (but we are sure this makes no difference to US, if it is nothing to YOU).

I shall see you at the wedding. You might drop a hint to Mr. Darcy that I plan to wear my green silk brocade which he complimented last year. With my best wishes for your health and happiness,

Caroline

Dearest Miss Bennet,

My brother writes to inform me that you are to be his wife. I cannot begin to find words to express my feelings. How happy you must be! I am certain that your family's rejoicing can scarcely be believed. I myself am all astonishment at the remarkable turn of events that has led to my calling you my sister.

By the bye, I deeply regret being unable to extend greater hospitality to you when I saw you briefly in London last winter. You are probably not aware that I was suffering from a recurrent attack of -- the name escapes me, that terrible lung malady -- and I scarcely knew what I was about! Throughout the season it took every bit of my strength to conceal my true condition from my relations and carry on my social duties.

There is no need to mention this upsetting fact to Charles as he would fret excessively over my health and his brotherly concern might be distracted from your lovely presence. So please do not mention it at all, if you would be so kind. I know you may be trusted implicitly in this matter as you are a lady of the very highest principles.

Please do not hesitate to let me know if I may assist you in preparing your trousseau. My brother tells me you have everything well in hand but he knows naught about the joys we ladies share in assisting each other with matters of fashion. I remain with affection, your sister-to-be,

Caroline Bingley

My dear Mr. Collins,

I must trouble you for congratulations. My lovely eldest daughter Jane has become engaged to a gentleman of highest repute, Charles Bingley of Netherfield Hall. You may remember him as the young man who is the closest friend of Lady Catherine's nephew, Mr. Darcy.

As Jane's relation, you are of course invited to the wedding, but several weeks ago you made clear to us your deep abhorrence of being associated with anyone related to Mrs. Wickham, so please do not attend at all if you would rather not. Although certain persons of fortune and title will be present, there will be no one of Lady Catherine's unique social reputation. With deepest respects to your wife,

Mr. Bennet

Dearest, sweetest sister,

Words fail me, so I shall be succinct: I am engaged to Miss Elizabeth Bennet. She has accepted the renewal of my proposals and we are to be married on the same day as Bingley and Jane.

I do not deserve such good fortune. She is the loveliest, liveliest lady in the world, and I can scarcely catch my breath long enough to write.

Dearest Georgiana, do you realize that you are responsible for this happy outcome? Had it not been for your presence at Pemberley I would never have found the opportunity to reacquaint myself with Miss Bennet, for following my miserable attempt at a first proposal (which memory even now gives me the shaking horrors), she would certainly never have visited Pemberley only to dine with me. Your gracious manners encouraged her and gave her a far better impression of our family than I could have dared hope to accomplish on my own.

And may I express again what mature and ladylike presence of mind you showed in failing to respond to Caroline Bingley's repeated improprieties during her last visit. I can still see you enduring her insinuations, despite the fact that they were not meant for you, and then composedly playing Mozart. I have never had a prouder moment as your brother.

I shall float back home for a fortnight before the wedding to arrange various matters, and then return with you to Meryton for the ceremony. Would you do me the honor of wearing the jewelry that our mother gave you? The sapphires illuminate the sparkle in your eyes.

Before you ask, no, I have not yet informed Aunt Catherine, and please do not mention a word of the engagement should she write. I prefer to handle the matter in my own way. Sharing the news with the immediate household is quite acceptable, however; in fact, the sooner they know, the better.

I shall write more as our plans develop, but count on my return within a few weeks. My darling Elizabeth, who will soon be your sister, joins me in sending you love. Your most devoted brother,

Fitzwilliam

Dear Mrs. Reynolds,

I am delighted to report that Pemberley will soon have a new mistress. Miss Elizabeth Bennet, who impressed you so much on her visit last summer, has accepted my proposals and will soon become my wife.

I must thank you again for all that you have done for me, especially in tolerating my unfortunate moods over the last year. I must certainly not have been an easy master. Yet Elizabeth gives me to understand that it was your high recommendation of me which first served to turn her opinion after that unfortunate incident at Hunsford (someday you must tell me how you learned of it). What I may have done to deserve such praise I cannot imagine, but kindly refrain from carrying on in such a manner to future guests; they will suspect me of being over-liberal with the staff.

There is so much preparation that must be done to receive my lady at Pemberley that I scarcely know where to start, so I shall leave matters in your competent hands for several weeks and communicate by post. I will be returning for a fortnight before the wedding to see to things personally; until then I prefer to remain near my fiancee.

We will, of course, be residing in the same master suite that I currently use as my bedroom. Anything you can do to make it look less as though a bachelor has been living there for several years would be greatly appreciated. Tell Marcus to reorganize the closets to accommodate a lady's belongings -- and in the state I left them in, he would be well advised to begin immediately. Among other things, it would be wise to move the fishing tackle somewhere else.

Bingley has kindly offered us the use of Netherfield for our wedding night, but as it will be rather crowded, Elizabeth and I would prefer to stay at a small inn somewhere along the road between Meryton and Derbyshire. Have you any suggestions? The Crescent and Thistle comes highly recommended.

Elizabeth sends you her warmest regards, and as she has made me the happiest man alive, I am certain you will find me a much less difficult master upon my return. Although I am embarking upon the journey of adult life, the part of me that has known you since I was four years old will always remain

Yours devotedly,

"Wills"

Aunt Catherine,

I do not know an indirect way of phrasing this missive, so I shall come straight to the point. You have told me that you celebrate frankness.

I am engaged to be married in several weeks' time. I am not engaged to your daughter Anne. I am engaged to Miss Elizabeth Bennet. I am perfectly aware of your feelings for this young lady, so be advised before you do anything rash that I am determined that she shall be my wife. It was a long and difficult task for me to persuade her to accept the sincerity of my proposals, and I scarcely feel that I merit such a prize. She is a beautiful and intelligent lady of rare spirit, as well as a gentleman's daughter. She has already made me happier than I deserve, and she will be a superb mother to our children.

My beloved sister Georgiana has met Miss Bennet on more than one occasion and finds her to be generous and warm-hearted. She has expressed, with her usual shyness, that she would not mind in the slightest if Elizabeth were to become her sister. I was happy to inform her that her dearest wish has finally come true.

You are my mother's sister and are therefore due all the respect that a nephew may owe to his aunt. However, this respect does not extend to tolerating any improper language or behavior directed at my intended wife. Therefore, if you will kindly reconsider what you said about her at our last meeting, I would be honored to have you present at our wedding ceremony. In fact, should you wish to make her acquaintance on friendlier terms, you would be graciously welcomed. If these conditions are not acceptable to you, then it would be better for all concerned if you remained at Rosings rather than distress yourself further with Miss Bennet's presence.

I still retain the deepest fraternal love and respect for Anne and hope to see her during the London season after Christmas. I also beg to remain,

Your nephew,

Fitzwilliam Darcy

Dear Cousin William,

I hope you are not steeped in strenuous military preparations about six weeks hence because I dearly wish for your presence as best man at my wedding. I am happily engaged to Miss Elizabeth Bennet.

How this happened is rather a long story. Suffice it to say that it was a hard road to victory. At times I began to think General Wellesley has an easier life.

I would write more but my hand is cramping up for some reason. Best wishes and I hope to hear from you soon. Your cousin,

Fitz

Dear Fitz,

To be perfectly honest, I not only congratulate you, I am near green with envy. Miss Bennet is a true prize. You shall never be bored or unhappy in a marriage to such a lady, and I only pray that if by some miracle you ever come across her double, you will send her speedily on to me.

I would be honored to serve as best man at your wedding. I understand this honor also gives me the responsibility of throwing a small celebration for you and your male friends. Shall we do it military style or would you prefer something more tame? (Do not trouble yourself with a reply, I am merely being facetious.)

Owing to your absence, I am concerned for Georgiana's loneliness (as are my parents) and I would like to visit her at Pemberley until you return. Fortunately my current militia duties may be carried out by post. We may repair to my parents' house for a few weeks. I will let you know of our plans.

Once again, heartiest and warmest congratulations from your somewhat green cousin,

William

Dear brother,

I hope this letter finds you and Louisa well. Events are proceeding at such a pace that I scarcely have time to inform you that Darcy will soon be the husband of Miss Elizabeth Bennet. They shall join Jane and myself for a double wedding ceremony in six weeks' time. Owing to this turn of events, I would like to ask you to serve as my best man; Darcy's best man will be his cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam.

I am aware that Caroline still has her cap set for Darcy. While I have the greatest love for my sisters, in this one case I feel exhausted from repeated attempts to convince Caroline that she would be better off looking elsewhere. As recently as a few days ago, she wrote and asked me to tell him what she would be wearing to my wedding!

I haven't the faintest idea how to break the news to her. You do it. Many thanks. Your grateful brother,

Charles

Dear Master Darcy,

I received your missive with the greatest of happiness on the same day that Miss Darcy received hers. It was unnecessary for me to inform the remainder of the house, per your request. First I heard your sister shriek with joy; the next moment she came dashing out of the parlor and hugged me with glee, then rushed around informing everyone in the house.

If you will forgive me, sir, I asked Miss Georgiana's permission for a toast. She readily consented and the household staff opened a bottle of port and toasted the future mistress of Pemberley (one swallow only, I was very cautious). Thus fortified, we began making preparations.

Do not fear for the appearance of the master suite, all will be readied in time. Diggens informs me that the small white winter roses should be blooming just in time for the arrival of your bride, so we shall be using them throughout the house. A few small alterations to the general decor shall be all that is necessary to make the room more suitable to a gentlewoman's taste.

Oh yes, the closets. Marcus began attending to them readily. You were quite correct, it was wise to start at once. In addition to the fishing tackle, which was speedily removed and cleaned, what do you suggest we do with your Cambridge cricket bat, worn-out riding boots, a broken fencing foil, and eight boxes of souvenirs from your Grand Tour? (I must say I laughed heartily when Marcus presented me with the inventory. It was good to know that in some ways adulthood has not changed you.)

The Crescent and Thistle is an inn of the very highest repute. I have also heard nothing but exceptional praise for the Corinthian Rose some fifteen miles further north.

We were all delighted to receive the news and look forward to your speedy return. And fear not, I have always refrained -- rather against my will -- from singing your well-deserved praises to visitors, except in one critical and special instance. I beg to remain, sir, your most humble and obedient servant,

Mrs. Reynolds

Dearest Lizzy,

I am delighted to hear of your engagement and rejoice in your happiness. We all heard the news yesterday evening. Mr. Collins would join me in sending his regards; however, presently he is at Rosings coping with speaking to Lady Catherine.

I would write more except that I would rather discuss the latest news in person. As I scribble this missive, Emily is packing our trunks for our immediate return to Lucas Lodge. I do not yet know the duration of our stay; perhaps two or three months. A carriage is being readied at this very moment and we shall see which arrives first, ourselves or this letter. More upon my arrival.

Forgive my using the back of a household list, it was all I could grab on short notice. Yours in haste,

Charlotte Collins

Fitzwilliam,

This is a moral OUTRAGE! I made my wishes perfectly clear to you regarding your marriage, yet immediately afterwards you deliberately chose to snub me and become engaged to a pretentious nobody of demonstrable social inferiority! At the time you visited last Easter I was aware of your foolish favoritism from the very first, especially when that wily, selfish girl used her pathetic attempts at musical arts to draw you in, but I expected you to have the grace to grow out of such adolescent infatuation. I have always known the character of Pemberley to be less dignified than that of Rosings, but I hardly expected this deficiency to extend to its inhabitants.

I warned you that this sort of thing must inevitably happen when one makes friends whose family fortune arises from trade only one generation removed. Had your upstart acquaintances, the Bingleys, stayed in their place, you would never have been tempted to quit your proper sphere. It is fitting that HE should marry a pretty face with no breeding or character, but for YOU, one of the Derbyshire Darcys, to fall into the same trap...I can only attribute it to a lack of proper moral upbringing in your youth.

I send NO regards. You shall suffer the social repercussions of my scorn until you break off your engagement and come to Rosings personally to beg my forgiveness!

Lady Catherine de Bourgh

Lady Catherine,

My congratulations. You have managed to insult me, my fiancee, my fiancee's relations, my sister, my best friend, my best friend's fiancee, my home, and even my parents in the space of only two short paragraphs. My admiration for your efficiency knows no bounds.

Unfortunately, your actions effectively put an end to all communication between us until such time as you are willing to provide written apologies to every one of us.

To put it mildly, I am seriously displeased.

Fitzwilliam Darcy

My Dearest Brother,

I hope you and Miss Bennet have received the long letters which I recently sent to both of you. I pray I did not bore you too greatly, but several pages were insufficient to contain all my delight at your upcoming marriage.

I am writing again in slight distress to inform you that Aunt Catherine has written me an abominably rude letter which, in essence, accuses me of having engaged with you in a conspiracy against both her and Anne. How she ever arrived at this fantastic conclusion I know not. Initially I was mortified, but cousin Fitzwilliam (he is visiting, as I believe he wrote to you) reassured me that this problem was in no way due to any fault of mine, that this storm would eventually pass, and that Aunt Catherine was merely "blowing the lid off the kettle," as he put it.

He insisted that I write to inform you of this unhappy event so that you might be fully apprised of the situation. I do not know what to make of it and hope that you will know what to do. Incidentally, Anne does not seem to have been a party to this sudden turn of events. Perhaps we should ask her to London?

My special love to Elizabeth (who will soon be my sister!),

Georgiana

Dear Cousin Anne,

Destroy this letter after you have read it and reply at once. Georgiana, Colonel Fitzwilliam, my fiancee Elizabeth Bennet, and I are all deeply concerned for your health and happiness. Your mother seems to be having a terrible spell of anger and we would rather you were removed into more pleasant surroundings.

The four of us have discussed the situation by post and arrived at the following plan. Our good cousin the Colonel has some friends in London -- very respectful and titled people -- who would like to send you a letter inviting you to spend Christmas with them. Once you arrive, he can meet you there; Georgiana, Elizabeth and I will join you after the first of the year.

Do whatever you can to smuggle a reply out with the next post. I remain your devoted cousin,

Fitzwilliam Darcy

Cousin Fitzwilliam,

THANK YOU! I have been in a terrible state and am relieved to the point of tears to know that my relations care so deeply for my welfare. Please have your friends send the letter at once. Your most grateful cousin,

Anne de Bourgh

Dearest Charles,

Forgive me for taking so long to write but I have been rather preoccupied. Brother Hurst informed me of Darcy's engagement to Miss Eliza Bennet. I wish them both joy.

Both he and you seemed to be under the mistaken impression that I had taken a fancy to Mr. Darcy. I assure you nothing could have been further from my thoughts! I hope I have been better raised than to throw myself at a gentleman, especially one so clearly interested in another lady.

On another note, as a matter of purely academic interest, do you happen to know if Mr. Darcy's cousin Colonel Fitzwilliam will be attending the wedding? I only ask because I wish to ask him some questions about the current Napoleonic troubles, since a woman of true accomplishment must keep herself well-informed about current affairs.

My most delighted good wishes to your friend, and pray send love to Jane from her future sister,

Caroline

Dear Cousin Fitzwilliam,

I scribble this missive in great haste amid my other duties to forewarn you that there may be a certain complication involved in your attendance as best man at my wedding. I still wish for your presence, but Bingley has just received a letter from his sister Caroline, the one who set her cap at me so flagrantly for more than a year, and he advises me to warn you that...

Dearest daughter Lydia,

How do you do, Mrs. Wickham? And how is your husband, Mr. Wickham?

I can barely contain the news. Lizzy will be the wife of Mr. Darcy! I will be mother to Mr. Darcy of Derbyshire! I will be the matron of the great estate of Pemberley and a house in Town! I can scarcely write for shrieking!

The double wedding will be in a few weeks' time and do forgive me for not having written earlier, but there is so much sewing to do, so much lace and silk to be bought and assembled, that I have been quite distracted. I knew anyway that you would not be able to attend because of your husband's military obligations. By the bye, how is winter coming along in the North Country? Do you burn much coal?

Yesterday a carriage arrived bringing a bolt of cream silk from one of the finest warehouses in London, and do you know that Mrs. Long turned positively purple? It serves her right for the flagrant way she attempted to push her daughter at dear Bingley, who was so obviously intended for my beautiful Jane.

When you are expecting your first, do not hesitate to inform me at once. After five daughters I know all there is to know about raising children. And do not believe that old wives' tale about rubbing butter into your belly before committing your conjugal duties in order to conceive a son -- it turns out to be the grossest falsehood.

The shipment of satin trim has arrived! I must be off! Ta ta for now, write back very soon to

Your Loving Mother

Dear Brother Gardiner,

I thank you for thinking of my health during our current confusion. Ordinarily I would accept your offer to repair to London for a few weeks while the ladies of Longbourn prepare for the double wedding, but this will be my last opportunity to be with my little Lizzy before giving her away to the lifelong care of a better man than I.

In response to your questions, the wedding will be dull. Freed of the presence of Mr. and Mrs. Wickham and Lady Catherine de Bourgh, which promised quite a bit of amusement, I expect nothing but peace and joy from the participants and guests. Mr. Collins will be present but I confess I begin to find his value as an object of mirth to be somewhat repetitious.

Mrs. Bennet is safely amusing herself with fashion advice for her daughters' trousseaus, thus enabling me to read in peace. Mary and Kitty are assisting in the sewing.

I must scold you for failing to inform me earlier of the true facts of Lydia's marriage. I spent several days in a panic over how I was ever to repay you. Had a sudden attack of apoplexy carried me off, I would have been forced to hold you responsible for the care of my wife and daughters after the Collinses take hold of Longbourn. As it happened, though, I quietly informed Lizzy's intended of my desire to repay him; he ranted and stormed about his love for her and the matter was closed.

Yesterday morning brought a gorgeous blue sky and light breezes, and I happened to glance out my library window. There on the front lawn stood my two eldest daughters, beautiful and radiant grown women, talking with their handsome, fine young men. I must confess the sight quite brought a tear to my eye. Soon they shall be married in mutual respect and love and embark on a journey which I may observe, but not follow.

It is difficult to understand how God has seen fit to give me such joy despite my life's failings. Perhaps His ways are more mysterious and merciful than I had dared to hope.

But I shall close before I become sentimental in my old age. We all look forward to your family's arrival. I remain your devoted brother,

Bennet

Posted on Wednesday, 26 May 1999

To Colonel Fitzwilliam, c/o Pemberley House, Derbyshire

Dear William,

I have completed the letter and, as requested, am sending it to you for editorial advice before posting it to Rosings. Since you informed me that your Aunt stands on ceremony beyond all belief, it seemed expedient to invent a bit. Will this do?

"Your Most Estimable Ladyship,

Lady Sheffield and I send our respectful greetings to you from Hayward House, our family residence in Town. Although we have not had the pleasure of meeting your Ladyship, your brother, the Earl of Matlock, was introduced to us two seasons ago when we were at the Opera for "Orfeo ed Euridice" (I am certain a lady of your highly reputed musical taste is passionately fond of Gluck). Since then we have been graced with the pleasant society of your distinguished relations several times per year.

When my wife and I were in company at St. James yet again last week, I commented to the Marchioness Eastbrook that these endless court functions were becoming tedious without any new and youthful faces. Directly she replied, "But where is Miss de Bourgh, the daughter of Lady Catherine? I have heard so much of her breeding and manners. The court should not be deprived of such an exceptional ornament. You must invite her at once."

Of course I was deeply concerned for your daughter's health and responded, "Madam, her uncle the Earl of Matlock has told us that she suffers from a poor constitution and is incapable of travel." "Oh, a poor constitution, that is nothing to Doctor Robertson," the Marchioness answered. "You need only mention my name and he shall be speedily at your service. Miss de Bourgh shall benefit from his care while in London."

At that moment I dared to venture, "With all due respect, Madam, I have it on good authority that Miss de Bourgh has never traveled without the company of either her mother or her governess, and I fear..." But the dear lady would hear no such objections. I repeat her exact words: "There comes a time when every lady of breeding must spend a period independent of her immediate family, provided she is under the protection of proper guardianship. Indeed, to venture forth and stand in society on one's own charms is one of the hallmarks of true pedigree. Bring her at once to your home, Lord Sheffield, and let her be presented. I shall brook no dissent."

Naturally I could hardly refuse such a request, which has the added advantage of being consistent with my long-held wishes. Our social circle in London comprises numerous families of rank, including several young and titled gentlemen who wish to be properly introduced to Anne owing to her exemplary reputation. Would it be at all possible, or do we ask too much, to be honored with the company of your daughter at Hayward House for Christmas and the season to follow?

If your Ladyship finds this plan to be agreeable, please inform us by post at once, as we must make plans for Anne to be presented at St. James shortly after the New Year.

Yours most sincerely,

Richard, Lord Sheffield"

P.S. The bit about the Marchioness should trump her. I pulled a likely name from Debrett's. -- Edgar

Edgar,

You, sir, are a genius. I am returning the letter to you. Post it immediately.

Be assured that I understand completely if you and Christina have changed your minds, but if you wish to continue with this plan, your assistance is greatly appreciated. There are no people in London I trust more than you. It is impossible for any of Anne's relations to invite her to Town, for communications between her Ladyship and the rest of our family has been rather strained of late. The situation is somewhat similar to the difficulties across the Channel, only without the advantage of gunpowder.

Darcy's wedding takes place in three weeks. As soon as my duties as best man are finished, I shall escort Georgiana back to Pemberley and wait for Darcy and Elizabeth, who will be spending their first two nights at an inn. Once they arrive home and have settled in, I can leave directly for your home.

It would be best if I hold the fort at Hayward House while you and Christina fetch Anne from Rosings. You will need to tell Lady Catherine that your parents are indisposed and sent you in their stead. To allay my aunt's vexed feelings, I can provide you with a letter of introduction from my "father" -- my imitation of his handwriting is quite good -- or you can provide one from your "parents". Is it not astonishing, the informal lessons we learn in school that prove to be of use later in life?

On behalf of Anne's conspiring cousins, I thank you and remain your loyal friend,

Col. Fitzwilliam

First page

Dear Cousin Anne,

If your mother asks why I have written you, hand her the second letter that accompanies this one. We -- Darcy, Georgiana, Elizabeth, and I -- finally have the plan underway. We enlisted the aid of my old friend Edgar, the younger son of Lord Sheffield.

Very soon your mother should receive a letter signed "Richard, Lord Sheffield," inviting you to spend Christmas and the season in London. The letter is actually from Edgar. Lord and Lady Sheffield are in Lancashire, where their eldest son's wife has just given birth to their first grandchild, and they expect to be there some time. However, we felt it was necessary to be creative in these diplomatic matters.

Given the phrasing of the letter, we expect your mother to reply speedily and permit you to travel. Edgar and his wife, Christina, shall travel to Rosings to fetch you shortly after Darcy's wedding. I shall be waiting for the three of you at Hayward House, their family's home in Town, where we will have a splendid Christmas. Darcy, Elizabeth, and Georgiana shall all meet us after the New Year.

One little detail regarding your health. If I may be so bold, I would very much like you to see a specialist, Doctor Robertson, to see if he can offer any advice on your condition. His suggestions may prove fruitful.

Do not bring the poodle. Your cousin in stealth,

Col. Fitzwilliam

Second page

Dearest cousin Anne,

Greetings from Derbyshire. I simply must inform you that my favorite hunting hound's bitch has finally given birth to her litter. Six fine, healthy puppies. As promised, you are welcome to your pick of the litter when they are old enough.

We are all somewhat taken aback by Darcy's marriage but I feel I must show up as a matter of form. I hope your mother will forgive me. Please convey my humblest respects. I beg to remain your devoted cousin,

Colonel Fitzwilliam

Your Esteemed Lordship,

I send you my most respectful greetings from the time-honored estate of Rosings. Your attentions to my daughter Anne are indeed gratifying. Ordinarily I would insist on accompanying her to Town, but if the Marchioness Eastbrook wishes Anne to stand on her own merits at St. James, then I can brook no objections.

Your concerns for her health are most sensible and appropriate. It is true that Anne's poor constitution has, in the past, prevented her from assuming her proper rank in society. But I am certain that any doctor acquainted with the Marchioness shall be quite acceptable for attending to Anne's delicate condition while she is in London, provided he is of good family, of course. Not that I am implying that the Marchioness would employ the services of a doctor of low family; quite the contrary. But you take my meaning.

I must condescend to make a request, however. Since you are acquainted with my brother the Earl, you have no doubt heard that my nephew, Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy, is marrying in a few weeks to a wily upstart from a family of no pedigree in Hertfordshire. This abominable alliance has resulted in my justifiable severing of all communications between us. He shall richly deserve the misery he has brought upon himself, but in the meantime my daughter must be shielded from the pollution of all contact with that disgraceful family. I am certain that you understand.

How delightful that you should have met my brother at the Opera. Gluck is indeed one of the most eminent of composers, is he not? I have always spoken of the treasure he has given us with "Don Giovanni."

If you would be so good as to fix a date when you shall call, Anne shall be prepared. I await your reply. Yours most sincerely,

Lady Catherine de Bourgh

Nephew,

Although you may perceive this letter as a gesture of magnanimous intent, do not hope that I condescend to offer you any sort of reconciliation. I shall never forgive your reprehensible behavior towards my daughter Anne. I only write to have you know that although she may not have been good enough for YOU, her reputation alone was enough to attract the attention of the Marchioness Eastbrook and several titled gentlemen in Town. In consequence, I have decided that her health will permit her to be presented at St. James in the company of the highest of London society. I hope this development makes you realize what advantages you have thrown away in choosing a country girl of no breeding for your wife.

I await your apology.

Lady Catherine de Bourgh

Cousin William,

I must write to tell you that the famous letter arrived two days ago. Your plans have worked a treat! You should have seen Mama's reaction. She cried, "Ha, ha! Let him take THAT!" and fairly leapt from her chair (in a manner of speaking).

I have never seen her so excited. She and Mrs. Jenkinson are in a perfect flurry, fretting over my gowns and hair styles, and advising me on this and that method of improving my complexion. You should see the gown Mama has chosen for me to be "presented"; it is a horrible shade of orange. I shall pack it away and forget it as soon as I arrive, and throw away all the apothecary's face creams. This fuss is all so strange to me, since Mama never wished me to travel to Town before. We have indeed caught her at a fortuitous moment.

She is increasingly in a terrible state as Cousin Darcy's wedding date approaches. I believe she is still waiting for him to change his plans and become engaged to me! When she is not lecturing the maids about the only right way to pack my things, she rages and storms, and insists that I sit with her for several hours every day, now that the Collinses have fled for Hertfordshire. I have been pleading weakness and taking to my room merely to get away from her.

To answer your question, I should be willing to see your Dr. Robertson, although I doubt anything can be done. I seem to have been cursed with sickliness and see no hope of improvement. But since you have been so good as to arrange my visit, I shall oblige you by consulting his opinion.

This must be the longest letter I have ever written! My hand begins to hurt so I will close. Forgive the muddy fingerprints, I have been smuggling out my replies via the head gardener. The poodle shall remain behind. And I remain your immensely grateful cousin,

Anne de Bourgh

Express Post: To Col. Fitzwilliam, c/o Pemberley House, Derbyshire

William,

What would you say if I told you that Gluck, not Mozart, composed "Don Giovanni"?

Edgar

Edgar,

I'd say you've had a letter from Lady Catherine. Congratulations! There are very few messages I would enjoy receiving at two in the morning, but this was one of them. I knew you would succeed.

You shall never believe it, but Darcy returned home for his wedding preparations to find a letter from our Aunt awaiting his attention. Do remember Mrs. Ashton's infamous dinner soiree, when our hostess attempted one of her dramatic exits, caught her gown on a door hinge, and ripped the fabric straight down the back? You may recall that peculiar grin Darcy had on his face. Well, I have just seen it again.

Has the Foreign Office promoted you to ambassador yet? And if not, whatever are they waiting for?

Many thanks for your kind efforts. I shall see you in fewer than three weeks. Best wishes to Christina, and I remain your friend,

Col. Fitzwilliam

Dearest Jane,

Greetings from Pemberley. We arrived yesterday evening. I send you and your husband all the love I can spare from Fitzwilliam and trust you are settling down well at Netherfield.

We cannot delay further in thanking you both for your calm and composed presence during the six weeks of wedding preparations. The sudden descent of all ones' relations, however loving, is far more than two spirits such as ours can bear with equanimity. How I should have gotten through this period without your gracefulness in coping with Mother is more than I care to think. Where you obtain your reserve of goodness and patience I know not, but you must reach into that fathomless depth and send some on to me when it comes time to raise children.

Fitzwilliam was right, a two days' stay at the Crescent and Thistle Inn was an excellent plan, but your generous offer of Netherfield was much appreciated. Our room was somewhat small but very pretty, and the inn was blissfully peaceful. The brief delay also gave Georgiana and Colonel Fitzwilliam an opportunity to travel ahead of us back to Pemberley.

As for our first night as man and wife...oh, Jane! I never imagined it was possible! He is ardent and warm and tender beyond compare. Before our wedding I only loved him with my heart; now he is the keeper of my whole soul.

But I know that you have your own honeymoon fresh in memory, and so I shall proceed to my first impression of Pemberley as its mistress.

We arrived towards dusk. With what effusions can I adequately describe my first sight of Pemberley in winter? The red winter sun settling over the western hills, the oaks dusted with fine new snow, the lake covered with a delicate sheet of gray ice, smoke billowing from the stone chimneys. A thousand shades of orange and blue light reflecting off every surface: windows, icicles, and snow-covered branches. Fitzwilliam called for the carriage to stop and we disembarked briefly, standing in each other's arms and gazing at the sight for several minutes.

At length we proceeded to the main entrance, where the whole staff stood to welcome us! I was tired from the long drive and lacked somewhat for liveliness. Fortunately Georgiana and the Colonel were there to greet us. My husband helped me alight and then announced me to the household. The sincerity of true welcome evident on every face was a great relief. Fitzwilliam must have given everyone quite a mistaken impression of my character, a flattering deception I hope to prolong as much as possible.

We went at once to our suite so that I could refresh myself. I will try to avoid praising it in the style of Mr. Collins, but it is a beautiful set of rooms. The windows face full south with a prospect over the lake, the furnishings are elegant but not showy, and there is a lovely scrolled mantelpiece on which Fitzwilliam has placed some charming souvenirs from his Grand Tour.

We postponed staff introductions for the morrow, for I was too tired to remember everyone's names, but Fitzwilliam asked if I would like a fresh tour of the house, that I might be comfortable with it immediately. You may imagine how readily I agreed, for my sterling reputation will indeed sink quickly if I am forced to ask the footmen for directions.

The house is even more beautiful than I recall seeing it last, elegantly decorated with pine boughs and tiny white winter roses at every turn. There are several areas whose existence I had not guessed. One of the more interesting is a splendid sporting room with a billiard table like that of Netherfield, as well as a large assortment of fishing tackle, riding crops, cricket bats, and fencing weapons, all neatly arranged in racks along the walls. I did not know Fitzwilliam was in the habit of hosting large sporting parties, and could not help teasing him for keeping it a secret from me. He blushed charmingly.

I could effuse about the home's other delights for pages, but I shall refrain before I sound like Mama. To think that had it not been for the Gardiners, I would never have seen this exceptional place or been united with its exceptional master! Fitzwilliam has never stopped praising them, and the whole family shall arrive shortly before Christmas. We shall miss you but quite understand if you and Bingley wish to remain at Netherfield. Should you change your mind, there is no need for foresight; set out at once. Our home is always open to you.

Georgiana is even sweeter than I remember her last, and shall be residing with us rather than returning to the tutelage of Mrs. Annesley. She shall not be "out" for another year, but will be traveling with us to Town after New Year's. The plan is still to meet Colonel Fitzwilliam and (keep this a secret still!) Anne de Bourgh. We have no idea how this matter will turn out, and it will not be easy to counteract years of Lady Catherine's tutelage, but something had to be done. Wedded bliss has softened my archness towards Anne and she now has my sympathy.

Pray write to me very soon. I must close now as I have much household business to attend to, but your loving sister wished you to be the first recipient of a letter in which she signs her name

Mrs. Fitzwilliam Darcy

Darcy,

By now you and Mrs. Darcy will have arrived at Pemberley, and I finally have leisure to write. I hope you enjoyed well-earned quiet and privacy on your honeymoon.

I must ask, do you remember anything at all of the ceremony? All I could think of was the angel standing next to me and I scarcely heard a word the minister said. I simply agreed to everything.

Please do thank your uncle the Earl of Matlock for me. His experienced advice was most sound. We eschewed a formal dinner in favor of a quiet meal for two in front of the fireplace in the first drawing room, the one with the beautiful view of the park. Carter fixed up a table with flower garlands and ordered a soothing supper of game and white soup. However, as your uncle predicted, Jane was nervous about our wedding night and could scarcely eat a bite. Advising me to humor her was a splendid suggestion. If I tell you how I went about it you may find me silly, but I shall dare your disapproval.

During our meal I told Jane the Persian cat story. Do not scold me for giving us away; it was a great success. You should have seen her expression. Then, several minutes later, after the dishes had been cleared, I told her that I had prepared a serenade for my lovely bride. With a slight flourish, I sat down at the pianoforte and favored her with my rendition of "Fair Flaxen-Haired Maid." You cannot doubt the results, knowing what you do of my musicianship (a word I use only in the most general sense).

Darcy, would you believe it -- she laughed out loud, crossed the room, and kissed me as warmly as I could ever hope. I carried her to our room and will discreetly add that matters from that point exceeded my wildest dreams. I am extraordinarily happy.

My thanks for extending Pemberley to us for the holidays. For a brief period I thought of accepting, as it looked as though we were in danger of having both my sisters and the Bennets here at the same time. I love them all dearly but was anticipating some difficulties. Fortunately, Caroline and the Hursts have decided to return to Town for Christmas, so we shall only be seeing Jane's family, whom I find I can bear very cheerfully indeed.

On another matter, is your rescue plan for Anne de Bourgh still in effect? Let me know if I may assist in any way. And tell your cousin the Colonel that I apologize once again for Caroline's attentions at the wedding breakfast. I must say he took it in very good humor.

I miss your company and shall count on hearing from you very soon. My beautiful Jane joins me in sending love to her sister and yours. I remain your most grateful friend,

Bingley

Bingley,

Ceremony? Were we involved in a ceremony? Be so good as to describe it for me; I remember nothing but the dark-haired goddess to my left.

William says to tell you there is no need to apologize for Caroline; we had warned him well in advance. If you ever tire of running an estate, he suggests a career in military reconnaissance.

Our honeymoon at the Crescent and Thistle was perfect. We both enjoyed our privacy immensely. It was not necessary to for me to tell stories to Elizabeth, thank goodness; I have not your talent for talking. Besides, I learned during our courtship that it is rather too easy for me to make her laugh at me in any case.

I was wondering how long it would take for your wife to hear the cat story. I hope she does not think she has married into a family of lunatics. As for your serenade, I knew something was up when we all heard you practicing a few days before the wedding. Good God, man, you might have warned us. My nerves were already on edge and I was on the verge of criticizing your servants for torturing sheep in the drawing room. Georgiana heard it differently; she thought someone was yodeling. May I suggest that you take a cue from the operatic stage and retire your musical career while you are still at the height of your powers? (Delighted to hear the outcome, however.)

Pemberley looked even more fine than usual upon our arrival; Mrs. Reynolds and the staff outdid themselves. Elizabeth is settling in beautifully. She learned everyone's names faster than even I anticipated, and they admire and respect her. You may have heard that when a new wife arrives through the front door, the servants depart through the back. They have all heard terrible stories from their relations at other estates, and were naturally afraid of a hard or selfish mistress.

It was with great delight that I could prove they had nothing to fear. In fact, two days after we arrived I overheard one of the grooms say to another, "My God, isn't she something? I always knew he would do better on his own than his family was doing for him." I was proud fit to burst.

Astoundingly, Anne de Bourgh is definitely coming to London, without Lady Catherine, for the season. Her cousins jointly conspired in this matter, but it was William and his friend Edgar Sheffield who brought the plan to fruition. As with all successful battle campaigns, we ask that you do not breathe a word of this affair; it will work its way through Meryton's communication lines and fly straight back to my Aunt. The local intelligence leaks could prove fatal, although I smile to think that they did prove useful in one critical instance about two months ago.

Our invitation for Christmas still stands, but after all the recent excitement we quite understand if you wish to remain at Netherfield. We shall miss your presence in Town, but should you and Mrs. Bingley wish to -- apologies, but I hear Bach; Elizabeth and Georgiana must be playing. I am off. Your friend,

Darcy

My dearest Lizzy,

Thank you for writing me so quickly. Delighted as I am with my husband, I miss you and shall count on hearing from you very often. And you need not thank me for what you call my composure during the wedding preparations. I was simply in heaven the entire time. Such a joy to see so many loving family members come to wish us well!

I must thank you, as well as our Aunt Gardiner, for reassuring me about the wedding night. I was still somewhat nervous, although there was no need. Caroline and the Hursts most kindly repaired to dine by themselves, while Charles and I enjoyed supper at a sweet table for two in front of the fireplace in the drawing room. He told me such charming stories that I was laughing out loud.

I must confess things took an unexpected turn. After supper, my dear Charles sat at the pianoforte and announced that he had prepared a song in my honor, which he proceeded to perform. I am struggling, without the slightest degree of success, for words that accurately describe his singing. He sounds vaguely like an owl losing a fight with a Great Dane. It took me some minutes to regain my composure, and then, I blush to inform you, I crossed the room and kissed him. You know that I am unaccustomed to forward displays of affection, even with my own husband, but it seemed the only way to prevent an encore.

Lizzy, how he embraced me in return! He carried me upstairs and our wedding night was perfectly delightful. I cannot imagine why I was so anxious; he is the dearest man in the world. If only everyone could be so happy!

But I simply must share with you a priceless story he told me over supper, for it is too good to keep to myself.

It seems that two years ago, Caroline Bingley kept a female Persian cat in their London home and was adamant that it should not come into contact with other cats for fear of sullying its pedigree line. One spring day it was the height of the season for animals to...engage in activity that produces baby animals. Caroline and Louisa had gone to dine with friends, and the staff was under strict orders not to permit the cat to meander outside. But it was a warm evening and the servants opened the second floor windows. Apparently the Persian sat in a window and yowled, attracting the attention of a scruffy stray tomcat! A parlor-maid heard noises and discovered them together on the windowsill. She tried to shoo the tomcat but they only moved out to the narrow balcony.

The maid hurried downstairs for a broom, nearly knocking over Charles and Mr. Darcy, who had just returned from their sporting club. She related the problem and they ran upstairs. They were carrying fencing foils; Charles impulsively lunged at the tomcat, but it fled for the roof with the Persian hot on its heels! Charles was absolutely horrified, but I now have it on firsthand authority that it is possible for your taciturn husband to laugh out loud for some duration. The way Charles describes it, Mr. Darcy spent quite a bit of time leaning out the window, looking upwards towards the roof "with a satisfied smile on his face."

After Charles reassured the parlor-maid that she would not be dismissed, he set about recovering the Persian, which could not find its way down. He says he appealed for help to Mr. Darcy with the words, "Good God, what shall we do before Caroline comes home?" to which your husband merely replied, "Turn the broom closet into a nursery."

The only way to reach the roof was by extending a ladder up from the back balcony next to Mr. Hurst's suite. Charles was unwilling to risk the lives of the servants, for it was quite far above the ground, and was going to climb up himself, but fortunately Mr. Darcy prevailed upon him to stay put. They agreed that if they left the ladder in place, the cat would eventually climb down when it was hungry. Thus resigned, they repaired to their rooms to wash and dress for dinner.

While they were so occupied, Mr. Hurst returned home from his club. You may imagine the state that Mr. Hurst is normally in when he returns from his club. Consequently, not one of the servants thought to tell him about the ladder outside his suite. When he saw it, he thought a burglar was on the roof and, rather than simply removing the ladder or calling for assistance, he decided to climb up himself.

Charles was in his bath when he heard someone yelling for help. He and Mr. Darcy, still wet and in their dressing gowns, no less, raced from their respective rooms to the back balcony to discover Mr. Hurst on the roof. By some miracle he had managed to ascend without falling, but climbing down was quite another matter, since he had to look at the street several stories below. The Persian raced down the ladder and into the house, but when Mr. Hurst made to follow it he nearly fell. To save his neck, Charles and your husband removed the ladder and placed it inside. They shouted that they would let him down around midnight, when they calculated he would have come to his senses. Mr. Hurst bellowed in confusion for some minutes, but eventually resigned himself to his fate and settled in for a nap next to the chimney pot.

When Mrs. Hurst and Caroline returned home several hours later, they discovered our husbands reading in front of the fireplace with the Persian sleeping nearby, all three a picture of innocence. They inquired after Mr. Hurst and Mr. Darcy calmly replied, "He's out for the evening." After the ladies had retired, the men quietly extended the ladder back up to the roof, threw paperweights to wake up Mr. Hurst, and allowed the mortified gentleman to sneak back into the house. Caroline's cat was discovered to be expecting several weeks later, which resulted in one of the housemaids now owning a rather sullied feline.

I am most curious to hear Mr. Darcy's version of this tale. But now I must close and attend to the household; there is so much to learn. Charles joins me in sending you both love, and you are the first recipient of a letter signed by

Mrs. Charles Bingley

My dear brother,

The Hursts and I send you greetings from Town. This year's Season promises to be an exciting and colorful one indeed, and we are so very regretful that you and dear Jane feel you must spend the entire winter at Netherfield. But Hertfordshire seems very suitable to two persons of your particular dispositions. I shall be keeping you and your in-laws in my thoughts.

It was so charming to see Colonel Fitzwilliam at the wedding! What a delightful gentleman he is, and so knowledgeable about foreign affairs. Indeed, he so piqued my interest (about warfare, that is) that I felt obliged to learn more about the subject by visiting Mr. Delancey's bookstore near Mayfair. Fancy my surprise when I saw the Colonel there, perusing a volume of Gibbon. We had such a lovely chat that it was a pity he had to depart so quickly for his dinner with the General before I could ascertain his current location in Town.

Would you be so good as to contact your friend Mr. Darcy and ask him to write to the Colonel, advising him that we should be happy to receive him at our home at his nearest convenience? My thanks. Most affectionate wishes from your sister,

Caroline

Darcy,

I simply must write at once. You will never guess what has happened.

Edgar and Christina departed very early yesterday morning to fetch Anne. They report that Lady Catherine was disappointed not to meet Lord Sheffield, but our forged letters of introduction, as well as Christina's elegant appearance, smoothed over her resentment and she permitted Anne to depart with them.

The party arrived at Hayward House last night after a quiet trip back to London; the Sheffields did not wish to make Anne anxious by asking too many questions. Upon her arrival, Anne was subdued as always, but did not seem unduly ill. This morning I arranged for Dr. Robertson to come and see her, as I wished to ascertain immediately that her health would not be endangered by the visit.

He interviewed her for over two hours and emerged looking very serious indeed. I was certain the diagnosis was rampaging consumption and was frankly horrified.

Darcy, I hardly know how to say this, but Dr. Robertson says that Anne's weak constitution must be a mistake. She is indeed sickly but he can find none of the usual physical causes for such a condition. She coughs and sniffles, but her lungs are normal and she does not have a cold. He has little idea what to make of the situation, and is in high hopes that her health can be remedied with proper diet and activity.

Based upon something Anne wrote in a letter to me shortly before she arrived, I believe I may have an idea of the problem. It seems utterly incredible, but is it possible that Anne has somehow invented her sickliness in order to cope with Lady Catherine? I am not suggesting that she has done so deceitfully or intentionally, but Mrs. Darcy once told me that her mother fancies herself ill when she is discontented; could Anne be another such case? I am struggling with this vaguely formed idea, although I feel as though I am clutching at smoke.

In any case, the remedy is apparent. Dr. Robertson advises us that activity and fresh society are precisely in order, so we shall celebrate Christmas in merry style and gradually go about introducing Anne to our friends in Town. She is very quiet and we do not yet know whether her social manners are as condescending as her mother's, but with Christina to advise her gently, there is always hope of improvement.

One more thing. Completely unexpectedly, I have run into Caroline Bingley. Since we sometimes move in similar social circles I would ordinarily not be surprised, but my suspicions were aroused by the location: a bookstore owned by a military historian. Is there any possible way you could mention to Bingley that he might tell his sister that I have no interest in her attentions? Please reply as soon as feasible. I remain your cousin in domestic strategy,

Col. Fitzwilliam
c/o Hayward House, Mayfair

My dearest daughter Elizabeth,

I send my love and blessings to you, Mrs. Darcy, and trust that you and your husband are well. In these good wishes I am joined by our somewhat smaller family party at Longbourn: your mother, Kitty, and Mary. I am certain that Jane would also send love if she could spare some from Bingley. In fact, these days I find that I am frequently drawn towards that happy couple at Netherfield, so that I might hear a few words of sense spoken together.

But do not pity me. I may yet relieve my feelings of being a neglectful father by coming to visit you at Pemberley, or perhaps assuage your boredom by sending Kitty to you for some tutoring in social graces. (In this last matter, by the by, I am perfectly serious; how soon would be convenient?)

Now to the main point of my letter. In her latest missive to your mother, Mrs. Wickham writes that she is eager to visit your great estate and may descend upon you at any moment without advance warning, another one of her "good jokes." Since none of us shall ever forget the results of her last "good joke," I felt obliged to warn you. Although I am certain that you are sensible enough to handle the situation, I am equally certain that, much like a barrel of water during a rainstorm, there is a certain limit at which Lydia's relations have their tolerance of foolishness filled to the brim, and beyond which her presence causes disaster. I believe your husband's attendance to her in London fulfilled his limit for the rest of his life.

There is, I will confess, one more point to this letter. Your wedding, my daughter, was the proudest and happiest moment of my entire life. Please convey my respects to your husband, and I remain,

Your Devoted Father

Dearest Lizzy,

I am sending this letter by express as it is a matter of some urgency. I have received a letter from Lydia requesting financial assistance. No doubt you have received one as well. As we discussed before the wedding, this situation was entirely to be expected, and we must resolve at once how best to handle the problem as she sounds rather desperate.

Lydia is too young to be married but I believe that as she grows older, she shall grow more sensible. Wickham must realize his errors and make amends of character, now that a wife is dependent upon him for support. But perhaps I should send them some money immediately as a temporary measure. What is your advice? Your loving sister,

Mrs. Jane Bingley

Dearest Jane,

I am scribbling a hurried reply on the back of your missive and returning it by the same express. Do NOT send money to Lydia. Allow me to make her an answer on both our behalves. I shall give you my views on this matter at greater length tomorrow. In the mean time, send her love, joy, and news of Netherfield, but absolutely no financial assistance.

Yours in urgent sincerity,

Lizzy

My dearest Jane,

Now that I have caught my breath and have leisure to write more on the matter of Lydia, let me reply in greater detail to your express letter of yesterday.

Sweetest sister, your judgment reflects more credit to your character than to those of Mr. and Mrs. Wickham, for I see no evidence that they shall ever become sensible in matters of money. If depriving them of assistance would teach them prudence by forcing them to live within their means, I would refuse aid of any kind. But in such a case I see no hope. SHE will always be reckless and HE will always be extravagant -- but for all that, Lydia is our sister and must not be permitted to starve.

However, it would be the utmost folly to send them money whenever requested, no matter how desperate they may sound. It can hardly be mere chance that Lydia's letter to me sounded less urgent; she knows full well that you have a more trusting heart than I.

I have written to inform her that she may not expect my husband to make Wickham's fortune. I have also asked her to send me an accounting of their monthly living expenses, so that I may ascertain the real cost of an elopement with one of the most worthless young men in England. I phrased it more politely, if less accurately.

This measure at least will force her to put pen to paper and do a reckoning of figures, no doubt for the first time in their marriage. With her accounting in hand, I shall reply with some suggestions as to reducing her expenditures, and later may send relief from my own purse if I deem it suitable. Permit me the dubious honor of the initial gift; I want to see how they spend it before they apply to you.

On a more refreshing note, thank you for the tale of the Persian cat. I am exceedingly well pleased with it. In fact, last night I surprised Fitzwilliam by asking him to describe exactly what Mr. Hurst looks like descending a ladder. He was reluctant, but I insisted that I would refuse to retire with him until he satisfied my curiosity. I shall leave his response to your imagination (although I must say, I never knew how quickly he could carry a load from the dining room to the first floor). I remain your loving sister,

Mrs. Elizabeth Darcy

P.S. Were you able to determine whether your husband is a baritone or tenor?

Dear Mr. Darcy,

I thank you for your exceedingly generous offer to leave my current establishment and travel to Pemberley to become Miss Georgiana's private tutor. However, despite the fact that she is the most delightful young lady of my acquaintance and the wages you offer are quite extraordinary, I prefer not to leave my present situation, which has the advantage of being located within walking distance of my elderly parents. I am certain you can understand my decision.

Be assured that I am gratified by your confidence in my abilities, and by Miss Georgiana's high praise of me, which I know that I scarcely deserve. If you so wish, I would be happy to recommend for you at least three other ladies who are most eminently well qualified to give guidance to your sister in the last year before she comes out. Perhaps if you were to interview them, you might find a tutor who meets your high standards.

Please contact me if you would like me to provide you with proper introductions. I beg to remain sir, your most humble and obedient servant,

Mrs. Annesley

My dear Darcy,

Forgive my writing you again so soon, but there is a small crisis at Netherfield and I request your advice. It seems that some of the crops have withered from the early frost and a few of my tenants are in danger of starving. It would be easy to offer them immediate assistance, but I am having difficulties calculating the correct method given the current tax laws. Also, I just discovered that another tenant will probably fail to pay his rents this quarter owing to a premature birth in the family, and there is a little problem with Caroline which I must also mention...

Dear Cousin William,

I apologize for not replying to your missive earlier. It was quite a shock to receive the news of Anne, as I am sure you are aware. What is more, at about the same time we received a few other interesting pieces of news, so that I have been somewhat pressed for time. I shall address the issue of Anne's health directly after the New Year, but for now let me sum up the present situation to see if I have put my thoughts together correctly.

Anne's welfare depends upon her being kept away from her mother. But her mother will take her back to Rosings if she is in contact with our branch of the family. So we cannot permit Lady Catherine to hear rumors that we are seeing Anne in Town, nor can we permit your father to discover that you forged a letter of introduction in his handwriting.

Mrs. Wickham requires financial aid of some kind (Elizabeth is coping with her), and either she or Catherine Bennet could arrive on a moment's notice, possibly accompanied by my father-in-law. Bingley needs estate management advice, Georgiana requires a new tutor, and you have to be saved from Caroline. What is more, the Gardiners and their four small children arrive for the holidays at the beginning of next week.

Thank goodness for dearest Elizabeth, whose lively humor is a constant source of joy in my life. For I was married only a few weeks ago, Christmas has not even arrived yet, and already I am considering signing my name

Fitzwilliam Darcy
Director, Pemberley Rescue Mission

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