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Posted on Monday, 22 January 2001
"William, you are exaggerating. It has only been two days since I saw you last. Truly darling I have to return home. I told my grandfather that I was exercising my horse and I would only be one hour."
"I wish you would just come with me to Scotland and then we could live happily ever after. We would no longer have to hide behind bushes or run into the forest for fear of our love being discovered."
"Darling, you know my feelings and my fears on that subject. I am so afraid of what would happen to my grandfather if I ran away with you."
"Yet you do not really know what he would do; you are just assuming he would take it badly. He does not even know that I exist; you never know he might even like me."
"You do not know him. He would not let a silly thing like affection cloud the fact that you are Protestant and he is a Catholic like me. That is not the only reason I will not marry you."
"You think I do not love you enough."
William turned his back on Anais; he did not want her to see the hurt look in his eyes. Suddenly he felt her small hand slip into his and lift it to her lips, placing the smallest kiss on it, making him turn around and see in her eyes what he had seen a thousand times before. In her eyes he saw how sorry she was for her beliefs but he knew that she could not change what she felt in her heart.
"William, my love."
With his hand still in hers she led him to the bench that they had been sitting on before.
"It is not that I do not believe that you love me because I know that you do feel something for me. Nevertheless, at sixteen we make mistakes and soon live to regret them. I do not believe that anyone could fall in love at sixteen including me. I just want us to be sure of what we are doing. I also want to know the consequences if I did marry you."
"Anais, no matter what happens I will always love you; that I promise to you. I will also promise that I will wait for you until such a time as when you are sure of your feelings towards me. As to the consequences of a marriage, I know that my parents will love you when they see you and welcome you at Pemberley if your grandfather disinherits you."
"Pray that he will not do that. It is not the money that I care about; after all, I will still have all the business that my mother and father left me. It is my grandfather's health that worries me. He is not a young man; he turned eighty on Monday. If I married against the church's wishes, it would most certainly kill him. That would kill me also."
Anais's eyes filled with tears and William pulled her into his chest. She loved being near him, feeling his arms rapped around her. This was the only place she felt safe, that not one single thing could harm her. She could not describe in words the love she felt for this person. From the first time she had seen him standing across a crowded room in Bath she knew that he was the one.
The fact still remained that she loved her grandfather. He had looked after her when on that fateful day her life changed forever, her parents were killed. She could not find it in her heart to disobey him. Another point to this tragic mess was that Anais had to be sure that William loved her and felt the same way she did. She had first hand experience about how easily boys of sixteen fell in and out of love. She did not want to see the day when William found out that he did not love her. She could not bear to see that look in his eyes, the look that blamed her for ruining his life. This was the only way to be sure. Make him wait, make him grow up and then he would know what he wanted out of life.
"I will not let that happen."
Anais looked up with a start. She suddenly realised where she was again. William took her cheek in the palm of the hand and kissed her with such passion that she had to put her hands on his arms to stop herself from fainting. After approximately fifteen minutes he pulled away not wanting to lose control of the situation.
"If we do not wish to be discovered, I have to leave now, William. I am sure my grandfather has the servants out looking for me now. It never takes me two hours to exercise my horse."
" I suppose the next time I will see you will be at your debutante ball. Will you save a dance for me?"
"Of course I will and I promise a few moments alone together."
"It must be only a few moments though, Grace is coming and she will be keeping a close eye on everyone."
"You are right, no matter how much I love your sister, or how close I am to her, I cannot but find in annoying that she has this obsession of having to know where everyone is and what they are doing. I am going to find it exceptionally annoying tomorrow night when I cannot get ten minutes alone with you."
"Well, I promise you, we shall have more than ten minutes alone together if I have to throw you over my shoulder and carry you out of there myself!"
"You will hear the sounds of hearts breaking all over the floor."
"I do not care; you are mine and you are staying that way."
With that William pulled her into another passionate kiss. After a further fifteen minutes Anais decided to take matters into her own hand and jumped on to her horse before William had a chance to kiss her again.
"Until tomorrow night my love."
"I am counting the minutes."
With that she galloped to the edge of the forest. William stood and watched as her figure disappear, thinking how tomorrow night seemed like a lifetime away.
Anais rode her horse, Chelsea, as fast as she could. She had to get home before her grandfather got suspicious. On the way home she thought about the time she had just spent with William trying desperately to remember every moment that they had shared. Trying to make it last longer than it had the time before. She remembered the fresh smell of his hair, the feeling of the soft material in his coat running through her hands.
When she finally reached home, she dismounted her horse and ran as quickly as she could up to her house. As soon as she got inside the door, she could hear her grandfather shouting for her.
In another one of your mood's grandfather? I must be kind to you I suppose if I want my ball to run smoothly. She thought to herself as she followed the sound of his voice to his study beside his bedroom.
"Where have you been?" She was asked abruptly as she entered the room.
"I told you grandfather before I went out I was exercising my horse" she went behind his chair and fluffed up his pillows but a swift hand stopped her.
"Stop that! Did I ask you to do that?"
"I thought you might like it. I always li......"
"You did not answer my question. WHERE WERE YOU?"
"I did answer you, I was riding Chelsea."
"Exercising a horse dose not take three hours!"
"It did not take three hours to exercise her. I had to talk to the vet about another horse that was lame and I also settled his bill and that took over an hour. I decided because you were sick yesterday, and I could not exercise her then, that I would take her for an extra long gallop today."
Her grandfather knew he had been beaten.
"Go get ready for dinner. Do not be late."
"Yes sir."
With that Anais left the room and walked to her room. She never paid much attention to her grandfather. She knew that his bark has worse than his bite. When Anais entered her dressing room, her maid greeted her.
"Good afternoon miss."
"Good afternoon Alice."
"Your bath is ready miss. Would you like some help?"
"Thank you Alice but I think I can manage. I shall call you to help me dress."
Anais wanted to be alone with her thoughts this evening and she knew Alice would only try to make conversation. Anais quickly got undressed and stepped into the bath and relaxed.
The first memory that came to her head was of how she came to England. Anais had been born in Ireland a few miles from a little town called Dundalk. Until she was five, she lived with her parents in their great estate Ballyhara which had been in her fathers family for eight generations. Six months after she turned five, her mother fell from her horse and died. Two months after, her father died of consumption, but she believed he died of a broken heart. Anais was left in the guardianship of her grandfather. Although Pierre Robillard had disinherited his favourite daughter for marrying out of the family circles, he could not turn his back on his little granddaughter who reminded him of someone he loved very much. He took her to America where he raised her as his own and grew to love her as much as her mother. When Anais was twelve, she was sent to school in England to learn how to become a proper English lady. This is where she had first met Grace Darcy a very talented piano player. Anais fell in love with her as soon as she met her.
Grace was everything Anais wanted in a sister. She was witty, funny, intelligent and sensitive. Anais and Grace would sit up for hours laughing, talking, and giving advice on gowns, balls and of course young men. They soon became very good friends. When Anais turned fourteen her grandfather suddenly became ill and Anais finished school early and returned to America. Her grandfather was soon well again but his illness weakened his heart. Anais knew he would never be in full health again. They suggested to Anais that she should take her grandfather away from his work and bring him somewhere he could relax such as the countryside. The last few months Anais had been pining for England and Grace, her newly adopted sister. Anais suggested to her grandfather's doctor that he be taken to Bath in England to take the water. When Anais asked her grandfather his immediate answer was no, but soon he gave in, there was nothing he could refuse to give Anais for long. They set of for England and their new home.
They bought a large estate not more than six miles from Bath called Westly Hall. It was soon arranged by Grace and Anais that Grace should visit her aunt Mrs. Mary Moore in Bath but things did not go according to plan. Grace's brother William, being the perfect gentleman that he is, decided to escort his sister to their aunts and look after her while she was there. The ladies arranged to meet at the pump rooms in the centre of Bath at 12.00 p.m. Anais arrived at 11.50 am Grace was not there so she sat and waited. She kept her eyes glued on the main door. All at once she felt tiny beads of sweat appear on the back of her neck and on her hands. She felt the blood rush to her face. She was staring at the most attractive man she had ever seen. He had the biggest deepest brown eyes, the cutest smile and the blackest curly hair she had ever seen. She felt her face getting redder and redder as he walked towards her and stopped in front of her. She suddenly realised he was not alone and that someone was talking to her. She tore her eyes away from him and there standing beside him was Grace. Grace, after tearing herself away from Anais, introduced Anais to her brother Fitzwilliam Darcy.
Anais and William were thrown frequently into each other's company. They found out that they had more than the obvious attraction for each other, they shared a love of the theatre, music, books and dancing. They soon fell deeply in love but decided to keep it a secret as Anais did not want to cause her grandfather any additional stress. She knew deep in her heart that he would not agree with the match. He was a French man and a Catholic to the very core and nothing could change that.
Anais decided she spent enough time in the bath so she got out and rang the bell for Alice. She got dressed quickly as her grandfather did not like to be kept waiting for his dinner. She entered the music room and was greeted by not a much warmer reception than before.
"You are two minutes late."
"I am sorry grandfather it took me longer to get dressed than I anticipated"
Addressing a servant he said.
"Pour my granddaughter a glass of sherry and then tell the cook that we are ready for dinner."
"Yes sir"
The servant handed a glass of sherry to Anais and left the room.
The next few minutes were held in silence until the servant re-entered the room the announced dinner.
Anais and her grandfather sat to dinner. After the second course had started Anais decided she could not take the silence any longer and tried to start a conversation no matter how painful.
"I think I must talk to Cook about the way we like our beef cooked."
Pierre decided to ask Anais something he had wanted to ask for months but had never found the right moment to. Pierre decided to break the ice with Anais. Looking at her he could see his wife Nadia looking back at him. Her eyes were deep brown and the flame of the candle danced in them. She had olive in them that glowed because of the candlelight that surrounded them. She had a button nose and the sweetest smile. Pierre knew that there were men in this world that would love to pick this delicate rose and spoil her but he could not let the same thing happen her that had happened her mother. He made a promise there and then he would not lose her like he had lost her mother and his wife before her.
"Anais, I was wondering did you ever notice the picture of your grandmother Nadia Robillard hanging in the picture gallery in America."
Anais looked up in surprise. She had not heard her grandfather talk so softly and lovingly to her since before she had left for school when she was fourteen. It was as if he were changing back into the grandfather she had loved for all those years.
"I always notice it, Grandfather, she was an extraordinary beautiful woman"
"You favour her in many ways."
For the second time that night Anais looked up in surprise.
"Grandfather did I hear you utter something that almost sounded remarkably like a complement."
Pierre reached over and took Anais's hand.
"Anais my love. I am most truly sorry for the way I have treated you. I was so afraid of losing you like I did your mother. I was afraid of you growing up. However, I am not afraid anymore because tonight I make a promise to myself, and to you, that I am never going to let you go."
"Grandfather you must let me go sometime."
"Never Anais. Never."
He raised her hand to his lips and placed the smallest of kisses on her hand just as she had done to William only that afternoon. Anais were truly scared, she had never seen him like this before, and something in his eyes told her that he was not joking.
William made his way slowly back to the hotel in the centre of Bath. His mind was filled with thoughts about Anais. What was she doing now? Was her grandfather scolding her for being late? Was she upset? What would his parents say if they knew? Nevertheless, he knew the answer to that question. Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy and Mrs. Elizabeth Darcy had always told their children that money did not matter in a marriage, the only thing that mattered was love. If they loved the person with all their heart then their parents would make sure everything was all right.
The next problem William had to face was trying to think up an excuse to explain to his sister where he had been for the last three hours. William did not think Grace knew what was going on between William and Anais but you could never tell with Grace. As Grace was Anais's closest friend, Anais wanted to tell her about their love, but William had talked her out of it. He hated lying to his twin sister. He had always been close to her, even closer than he was with his best friend Charles Bingley Jr, and felt he could tell her anything. Yet he did not want to leave anything to chance. He wanted to make sure that nothing could jeopardise his future relationship with Anais.
When William finally arrived at the hotel, an angry reception met him.
"Where have you beeeeen!" Grace asked William while patting her tiny slipper against the polished floor. Grace was sixteen just a few months older than Anais. William was quite taken back by this reception. He had hardly ever seen his sister angry. Her sapphire eyes were wide with anger.
"Grace! I was exercising my horse. I told you that. Why are you so angry?"
"Why am I so angry? Yes, you told me that you were going to exercise your horse but you neglected to inform me that it would take three hours. You promised to take me shopping to day to buy Mother and Father's anniversary gift."
"Grace, I am so sorry. I completely forgot about it. Forgive me?" He slowly stalked over to her and took up her hand and looked at her with his puppy dog eyes that nobody could resist.
"I really should not but I suppose we could postpone it until the day after tomorrow."
"Why not tomorrow?"
"William have you forgotten already? Tomorrow is Anais Butler's coming out ball."
"Oh yes I totally forgot," William replied slyly from behind his newspaper.
"You must remember tomorrow night. I cannot go unattended. Promise me you shall not forget. Promise."
"I promise, but you know how much I detest balls."
"You are so like father. You should learn how to enjoy yourself more."
"I do enjoy myself." More than you know.
"William, it is six o'clock. I will return to my room to refresh for dinner."
"Fine, I think I will follow your example."
With that William and Anais retired to their rooms to freshen up for dinner.
"Lord and Lady Chester."
"How delightful of you to come. Let me introduce my granddaughter, Miss Anais Butler."
"How do you do?"
"Thank you for your invitation. You have a very attractive home. I see you have a long line of visitors to receive but I am looking forward to having a little chat with you during the course of the evening."
"I will look forward to it, Lady Chester. Enjoy your evening, Lord Chester."
"Thank you."
The night had finally come, the night of her coming out a ball. It was supposed to be a joyous occasion -- the night she could dance with William -- but it was anything but joyous in Anais eyes. She wanted desperately to tell William about her grandfather so he could hold her and tell her everything was going to be fine and that everything would go according to plan.
Anais quickly scanned her eye down the long line of ladies and gentlemen, all coming to say the same thing as the last person.
"Lord and Lady Gibson," the Butler announced.
"Lord and Lady Gibson, how good of you to come. Let me introduce my granddaughter, Miss Anais Butler," her grandfather said sweetly, as if he could burst with admiration and love for these people.
"Miss Butler you look ravishing tonight."
"Thank you, Lord Gibson. That is very kind. Lady Gibson, it is very pleasant to see you again," Anais replied, trying to keep her mind on how to be the perfect hostess and off William.
"Mr. Darcy and Miss Darcy."
Anais looked up with a start, forgetting Lord and Lady Gibson. Suddenly she felt somebody nudge her and she noticed her mistake. "Forgive me, Lord and Lady Gibson I....."
"We understand, Miss Butler. I know how daunting your first ball can be."
"You are very kind Lady Gibson."
With that, Lord and Lady Gibson walked into the ballroom.
Anais turned around to see her grandfather staring at her curiously.
"What has got into my girl? Remember yourself."
"I am very sorry, Grandfather. I am afraid I will forget somebody's name and I was startled when the butler called out my friend Miss Darcy's name. Do you remember my telling you about her?"
"Yes, I understand your concerns, but I will be there to help you. Now just stay calm."
"Thank you, Grandfather."
William and Grace walked up to Anais and her Grandfather.
"Anais, the house looks marvellous and you look ravishing."
"Thank you, Grace .I'm so nervous I cannot think about anything," Anais replied, wrapping her arms around Grace. Anais was trying her best to act normally in front of Grace and her grandfather. She did not want her love for William and her annoyance over what her Grandfather had promised to shine though. She managed to tear eyes away from William and restrict herself to a few short sly glances. "Grandfather, may I introduce my best friend Miss Grace Darcy?"
"It is a pleasure to meet any of my granddaughter's charming friends."
"It is an honour to meet you, Mr Robillard. Let me introduce my brother, Mr. William Darcy."
"How do you do, Mr Darcy?"
"As my sister said, it is an honour to meet you, Mr Robilard. It is very nice to see you again, Miss Butler."
"I understand from my granddaughter that your family originate from Derbyshire, Mr Darcy."
"That is correct, sir. Our family owns an estate there."
"I hope your journey was not to tedious," Anais said trying to get a little attention from William to try to tell him that they would have to talk.
"Thank you for your concern, Miss Butler, but the roads were dry it was not so bad."
"I am sorry I have to break up this reunion but it is getting late and Anais and I have to open the ball. If you will excuse us."
"Of course, Mr Robillard."
"Grace, we will speak later. It was a pleasure meeting you again, Mr. Darcy," Anais answered with a last glance at William.
William watched as Anais walked away. Her eyes were wide with worry and she seemed to be shaking.
"Good evening, Mr. Darcy, Miss Darcy."
"Good evening, Mr Morgan, Mrs Morgan. I trust you are finding the evening enjoyable?"
Mr. and Mrs Morgan interrupted William's thoughts. Mr Morgan attended the same club as William's father, Mr Fitzwilliam Darcy.
"We are, Mr Darcy, thank you. I was not aware you were friends of the Robillard family," asked Mrs Morgan always digging for gossip. William always wondered how a decent man like Liam Morgan ended up marrying a gossip like his wife. In his opinion, they were not suited together at all but who was he to judge?
"Anais Butler is a great friend of mine, Mrs Morgan. We met while we attended the same school."
"How interesting."
"How is your father? I did not notice him at the club last week," started Mr. Morgan trying to draw the attention away from his wife who was about to ask another personal question.
"I am afraid my father was suffering from a head cold last week and the doctor persuaded him to stay indoors."
"Tell him I was asking for him."
"I will of course, sir."
"How are you enjoying the ball, Miss Darcy?" asked Mrs Morgan, getting tired of a conversation she had no part in and again angling for news.
"I am enjoying it quite well so far, Mrs Morgan. Thank you."
"Do you not think, Mr Darcy, that Miss Butler dances to perfection? How beautiful she looks in that ballgown. That colour suits her perfectly."
In an instant, William's eyes were glued to Anais. He forgot where he was and it was as if they were the only two in the room. Their eyes locked for a second and then Anais, realising how dangerous it was, broke the lock. Mrs Morgan was right, the cream gown suited Anais perfectly. It was in a new fashion and showed her elegant figure as she glided down the ballroom. William felt something tip his arm in an instant he remembered where he was. He tore his eyes away from Anais and realised that Grace and Mr. and Mrs. Morgan were all staring at him.
Mrs Morgan had a sly smile on her face as if to say "I know your secret and so will all of England." Grace was looking strangely at him.
"I'm sorry, I got distracted. I think it is time for a dance. Would you care to dance Grace?"
"I would love to. Excuse us."
William led Grace to the top of the ballroom where the second dance of the night was beginning.
"What is wrong with you? Are you sick?" Grace asked.
"I am perfectly fine. Grace, ask me no questions tonight please."
"If that is what you wish."
William was suddenly tired, Tired of all the pretending. Tired of not being able to see Anais when he wanted. Tired of not being able to hold her when they both wanted. Yet most of all, tired of lying to everyone. He had to talk to her.
When the dance was over, a friend of the family, Mr Casey, asking Grace for the next dance, approached William and Grace. Grace accepted and was led to the dance floor by Mr Casey, leaving William alone. He noticed Anais standing on her own surveying the dancing. This was his chance to talk to her.
Slowly William made his way over to Anais. He avoided eye contact with any of the other guests in case they tried to make conversation with him.
He finally reached Anais. "I wish you did not look so beautiful," he stated in a sly and devious voice.
"Why? And keep your voice down, or someone will hear you."
"Because then I would be able to resist the urge to pull you into my arms and kiss you, then carry you away to Scotland."
"How I wish you would," Anais replied, looking at William straight in the eye telling him that she would willingly consent to this plan in an instant.
"We have to talk tonight."
"I agree. If you walk out the main entrance to the ballroom you will see a large corridor opposite you across the hall. Walk towards it and enter the sixth door on your right. It is the library. I will meet you there in ten minutes."
"A perfect plan, but it seems that we are the centre of attention at this moment."
As they were talking in a very secret manner, it had drawn much attention to them that they were unaware of.
In a loud voice William said, "Miss Butler would you do me the honour of this dance?"
"I would love to, Mr. Darcy."
With that, William reached out his hand and with Anais's hand securely placed in it he led the way to the centre of the dance floor. The music started to play a very slow-moving song. About two seconds into the song, Anais's friend Claire Murtagh took her place on the stage and started singing.
Laugh and cry, live and die
Life is a dream we are dreaming
Day by day I find my way
Look you the soul and the meaning
Then you look at me
And I always see
What I have been searching for
I'm lost as can be
Then you look at me
And I am not lost anymore
People run, sun to sun,
caught in their lives ever flowing
Once begun, life goes til it's gone
We have to go where it's going
Then you look at me
And I always see
What I have been searching for
I'm lost as can be
Then you look at me
And I am not lost anymore
And you say you see
When you look at me
The reason you love life so
Though lost I have been
I find love again
And life just keeps on running
And life just keeps on running
You look at me and life comes from you
At the end of the song there was a large applause for Miss Murtagh. Anais and William were both delighted at the fact that Claire had sang, as the guests paid all their attention to her and not to Anais and William. As the song had progressed, Anais and William had become closer and closer together. By the end of the song if they had been any closer, Anais would have been in William's suit beside him. However, if they had thought it had gone unnoticed by everyone they were most certainly wrong. One lady was paying special attention to them; it was Mrs Morgan.
When Anais and William finally broke apart, William managed to sneak out of the room without Grace noticing but, again, Mrs Morgan was not so easily swayed. She also noticed Anais leaving the room ten minutes later.
Anais ran quickly down the darkened corridor, inpatient to see William again, to feel him again. She entered the library and quickly closed the door behind her. Without even time to let her eyes adjust to the darkness of the room, William swept her up into his arms and kissed her with such passion that Anais had only ever read about in novels. Eventually, the pair separated.
"Anais" "William" they said at the same time.
"William please let me speak first. I have something to tell you."
"You know I will always listen to you, my love."
With that, Anais told William all that her Grandfather had told her and promised her.
Meanwhile, in the ballroom Mrs Morgan was making trouble. "Miss Darcy, it seems that you have misplaced your brother."
"I am afraid you are right, Mrs Morgan. Maybe he has gone into the garden for a breath of fresh air. I think I will go on to the porch and look." With that, Grace left Mrs Morgan and went in search of her brother.
Mrs Morgan stood there in disgust. Her plan A had failed, but plan B would not. She strode over to Mr Robillard.
"It seems that everyone is getting lost at your ball, sir."
"How is that, Mrs. Morgan?"
"Well, your granddaughter is nowhere to be seen, and now Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy has gone among the missing."
"Maybe Anais is sick. I will go in search of her. If you will excuse me?"
"Of course. May I be of some help? I just happened to notice Miss Butler running in that long corridor opposite the entrance of the hall. It would be quicker if the two of us went in search."
"Maybe you are right...if it is not any inconvenience to you."
"It would be a pleasure. As you know how gossip starts, we want to protect ourselves. We should take someone with us. Ahh, there is Miss Darcy -- I am sure she would oblige us. I will ask."
"Off course, how wise of you."
Meanwhile in the library...
"Anais, calm down. I'm sure he did not mean what he said."
"He did, William. You do not know him like I do. He will do anything he wants. William, I have to confess something to you, but first you said you wanted to talk to me about something?"
William look straight into Anais eyes, trying to judge what would be her response to what he wanted to say. He did not see her response but something else, something more intense, more strong. He saw the love that they both shared for each other, even now as they sat on the floor in front of the great fire in the library of Anais's grandfather's house, both knowing that at any moment someone could walk in and see them in such a passionate embrace, but it did not matter. All that ever mattered to William, or would ever matter, was in his arms and he would never let her go, no matter what they would have to give up to be together.
"Anais, what I wanted to say is that I am so tired of all this pretending, all the lying to everyone, even your family and friends. All I want and all I will ever want is to be with you. I know how you feel about eloping but........."
"William, no buts. I love you. I only realised it when Grandfather said he would never let me go. The feeling of never seeing you again, never feeling you again, made me want to die. I never want to live another day without you. I need you. The only reason I get up in the morning is because there might be the slightest chance of spending at least one minute in your company. I love you."
All William could do was take Anais in his arms and kiss her. There are no words to describe the feelings both felt.
"William, we have to stop, my love. We have to make plans."
"If we must. We will go to Scotland when it is safe."
"It would be too much of a risk tonight. How about tomorrow night?"
"I will get the coach ready. Will I take Grace?"
"Could we? I would love it so, William."
"I do not see any danger in telling her now. What time does your grandfather go to bed at?"
"He would be in bed at 10 o'clock, but it would be safe for me to leave the house at 1 o'clock. We could meet outside the park at 1 o'clock. Would that be suitable?"
"That would be perfect. Now, how about enjoying our last few minutes alone together."
"Do I have a choice?"
"Not really."
William pulled Anais closer again into a loving embrace. They did not realise they had an audience until Pierre Robillard shouted, "Get your hands off my granddaughter you English b#@?/*% !!!!" Then he collapsed on to the floor.
Posted on Monday, 26 February 2001
"Grandfather? It is Anais. How are you feeling? The doctor has just left. He says you will be fine with rest. It is all my fault, Grandfather. I am so sorry."
Anais broke down in tears beside her Grandfather's bed.
"Anais, please stop. It was not your fault. I should not have let you come to England on your own. You were on your own without friends. I should have known that you would have been a victim for fortune hunters. It will be fine from now on. We are leaving today for America."
"We cannot, Grandfather. We will never have the house shut down and all our things packed by tonight," replied Anais, suddenly getting worried that she would not be able to leave her grandfather and go to Scotland with William.
"We will just take the clothes we need for the journey."
"What about your health?" Anais was steadily losing the fight. "The doctor said you had to stay in bed and rest."
"I can rest on the boat. Now be a good girl and tell the housekeeper to make the necessary arrangements. Then find my valet and tell him to attend me. Then darling, pack the clothes you will need for the journey. When we reach America, I will buy you new clothes."
"Yes, Grandfather." With that Anais left the room.
There has to be some hope. There must be something I can do, Anais kept saying to herself over and over again. Maybe I can run away now and go to William in the hotel, and we can leave for Scotland straight away.
Yet, Anais should have known better. Her grandfather knew Anais would not give up her love for William that easily. He sent Anais's maid, Alice, to stay with Anais through the whole course of the day to make sure that she did not do anything silly. Anais was trapped.
"This it so romantic, eloping. I never knew you were romantic, William."
"There are many things you do not know about me. I only hope Mother and Father will find it romantic."
"I am sure they will. They only have to take one look at Anais and see how much the two of you are in love."
"If they do not approve, I will have no choice but to take Anais away from England."
"You would leave England? You would leave Pemberley and your fortune just to make Anais happy?"
"Of course I would. I would do any thing for her. Pemberley and my fortune seem such a small amount to pay for spending the rest of my life with the only person I will ever love. Do you not think so?"
"You really do love her. I never realised. How was I so blind?"
"You are not the only one who did not see our love. Charles Bingley Jr. did not know until I told him."
"You told our cousin and you did not tell me or any of our other brothers or sisters?" replied Grace looking very hurt.
"I had to tell somebody, I was going mad. I had to talk to somebody. Bingley did not know Anais. I needed somebody with an unbiased attitude. Am I forgiven?"
"I suppose so."
"I will buy you a very big present when this is all over. I promise. Now we have to get ready."
It was a very dark night. The only light the groom had was the light of the moon showing the way down the narrow roads of Bath.
"Grace are you cold?"
"No, I am fine, William. Just a little nervous. What time is it?"
"Why are you nervous? I am the one who is eloping. It is 12.50 am. We are nearing Anais's estate."
"I am nervous in case Anais might not have been able to leave the house."
"Please do not say that."
"I am sorry. I am just worried."
"It is fine. We are nearing the place where Anais should be waiting."
The carriage pulled over to the side of the road but instead of Anais waiting there, her servant, Alice was there.
"Where is Anais?" William hissed.
"I am sorry sir. Miss Butler was unable to attend you. Her grandfather took her in a carriage to the port earlier this evening. Tonight they were boarding a ship for America. Miss Butler asked me to give you this letter."
William grabbed the letter and ripped it open.
My Darling William,Over the past year, William, we have written so many letters to each other but this, my love, shall be the last. At this very moment I am supposed to be packing my clothes and personal items and preparing for a long journey back to America where I will spend the rest of my life.
I am writing this letter to thank you for every moment you allowed me to spend with you. You will never know how much I will treasure for the rest of my life the memories that we made together.
I am also writing this letter to ask you to do one last thing for me. That is to forget me. To forget the promise you made to me two days ago when you said you would wait for me. I could not stand to live my life and think that you are living yours with me in the back of your mind. Just forget. Like I will try to every day.
I wish you every happiness in life, marriage and love. You will always be in my heart, no matter where you are. I hope you will be able to forgive me one day for not running away with you the very second we met because I know that I will never be able to forgive myself.
With all my love,
Anais Scarlett O'Hara Butler
"William, dearest, try even a little to look happy to be home. I know how heartbroken you must be but if you do not want our parents to be suspicious you must try a little."
"How can I, when everywhere I turn I see her? Did I tell you that I stopped a stranger in the street yesterday morning because I thought it was Anais?"
Grace looked at her brother, not knowing what to say. She had never seen him so melancholy. He was always so full of life and so happy. She did not even think that William was capable of such love.
"William, you are going to have to get over her and start a new life. It is what Anais would want. You have to face the truth that Anais will never return to England and even if her grandfather dies he will probably have her married beforehand to someone he deems suitable."
William was a little angry at his sister's honesty but he knew she was right.
"How can I get on with my life when I compare every girl I meet with the only girl I will ever love?"
The carriage suddenly pulled in to the gates of Pemberley.
"Give it time, my dear brother."
It had been four days since Anais's coming out ball. William was heartbroken, and Grace was very worried about him. It had been planned that there would be a party for Grace and William's parents' 17th wedding anniversary. It was not going to be a big party, but merely a gathering of friends and family to mark the occasion.
William and Grace's favourite cousin and friend, Charles Bingley, would be there and Grace hoped that having him to talk to would raise William's spirits. It was not that William did not have his other brothers to talk to, but they were all younger than he was. The next boy in the family was Edward and he was but 15 years of age. Over a year after Charles Bingley senior and Jane Bennet got married they found out how short a distance it really was from Longbourn to Netherfield and decided to move to the neighbouring estate to Pemberley, Westly Hall. Charles Jr. was 2 months old when this move took place and shortly after there was also two new arrivals to Pemberley. Charles, William and Grace grew up as close as brothers and sister and confided everything to each other.
Suddenly the carriage stopped. William stepped out and helped Grace.
"William!! Grace!! My loves, how I missed you so." Elizabeth wrapped William and Grace in a warm embrace. Like any loving mother she hated her children travelling and preferred to have them at home were she could supervise them at every moment of the day.
"Oh Mother, it so good to be home!! Bath is beautiful but it does not compare to Pemberley no matter what time of the year it is."
Grace was overjoyed to be home. She hated leaving her home and she knew how much her mother hated her to leave.
"Hello Father!!" Grace ran into her father's arms. She had always been her Daddy's little girl and could get anything she wanted if she asked him nicely enough.
"Gracie my love!!! Did you have a nice time? How was Bath? Did you......?"
While Fitzwilliam was greeting his daughter Elizabeth noticed how quiet William was.
"William? Did you have a nice time?"
"I had a very nice time." He kissed his mother on the cheek.
"And what about the ball you and your sister attended?"
"Both Grace and myself had a very enjoyable time." As he said this his face suddenly clouded over with emotion.
"I do love you, William, more than anything. You know that and I will do any thing for you."Images of the precious time he and Anais spent together passed though his mind."Elope with me, Anais, please."
"I cannot."
"William?"
"I am sorry, Mother. Will you excuse me? I am getting quite cold and I must go in and greet our guests."
"If you wish my love." With that William walked indoors forgetting to offer his arm to his mother and leaving her standing alone.
"Elizabeth, what is wrong? Have you had a falling out with William?" asked Fitzwilliam walking over with Grace on his arm and noticing the hurt and puzzled expression on his wife's face.
"I do not think so, my love. All I did was ask him about the ball he and Grace attended and he suddenly went quite peculiar. Did something happen at the ball Grace?"
"No Mama," replied Grace unable to look her mother in the eye.
"You would tell us if something was wrong, would you not, Gracie?"
"I would Papa," she said, unable to meet her father's eye either.
"Perhaps he is tired?" said Elizabeth searching for a reason for her son's bad manners and bad spirits.
After a few days had passed everyone was still noting how changed and preoccupied William was. Three days after the arrival of William and Grace, William and his cousin Charles Jr. escaped from the crowd and decided to do a spot of fishing on a river on the estate.
"As much as I love parties I do enjoy my time away from them just as much." Charles Jr. stated trying to draw William's attention. He had not said one word in the last hour.
"Hmmm."
"Is it not a glorious day?"
"Hmmm."
"I am running away with the parlour maid."
"Hmmm."
"William!!!!!" Charles Jr. reached over and pushed William with such force that he fell in a heap on the ground.
"What on earth did you do that for?" William said angrily as he picked himself up from the lush, green grass.
"You were in a world of your own and you have been ever since you arrived home. Everyone is very worried about you, your mother in particular. What is wrong?"
"I will tell you if you swear not to tell anyone. Grace already knows."
"I promise!!"
"Do you remember I told you about Grace's friend from school?"
"I think so. Was she American?"
"Yes. I fell in love with her Charles. I do not think I will ever get over her." A far away look came to William's eyes. He suddenly remembered the first time he met her. He continued telling Charles Jr. about Anais.
"I remember the first time I saw her. She has the biggest brown eyes you have ever seen. Her hair is so black and so thick. She has got the most beautiful smile and laugh. She is also intelligent and so kind and warm hearted, you would love her too."
"Is that all that is wrong with you? You miss her, is that all? I am sure you could see her any time you want. But why have you not married her yet? Is it an unacceptable match?"
"Not in the way you are thinking. Her family is very wealthy and she is the sole heir to a large fortune. There is only one problem. She is a Catholic. We planned to run away together but before we could her grandfather found out and took her back to America. I do not know if I can live without her."
"William, this is so unlike you. Pick yourself up. If she is that desirable then wait for her. Her grandfather can not live forever."
"Even if her grandfather dies, it is unlikely she will be still unmarried. He will force her to marry a man more suitable."
"Listen to me, William, if it is so unlikely that you will see her again, you should not throw your life away like this. I am sure this girl would not want that. How about if you accompany me to London and as Shakespeare says, "I will make thee think thy swan a crow".